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| Prism Sakuru; Hoop Blade | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: Jan 14 2013, 07:23 PM (348 Views) | |
| Eyelusion | Jan 14 2013, 07:23 PM Post #1 |
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Fresh Meat
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Character Name: Prism Sakuru Age: 17 Gender: Anatomically, Prism is a male. However, his appearance is too androgynous to tell. Type: Weapon Partnered? Yes- to Markus Image: Weapon Form Clothing and description: Prism is 5’11” with a feminine, athletic build. He doesn’t quite have the breasts of a female, yet his soft features make it difficult for onlookers to identify his gender. His skin is silky pale and flawless. Prism has long silvery white hair falling just past his shoulder blades and bound together with a yellow ribbon. His eyes are a warm orange yet hold the composure opposite of intense. He wears and old fashioned poet’s blouse with ruffled cuffs and collar. The blouse is white with pearly dark blue buttons. The belt prism wears to keep his brown pants up is as green as the grass and his shoes a royal purple. For parties he wears a Pink kimono with red dragons, not because he wishes he were a girl, but because it flatters his figure. Weapon form Appearance: In weapon form, he takes the form of a ring/hoop blade. On the inside is a white steel hoop where the wielder holds. The outside of the hoop is a blade that looks as if it is a glass blade. The glass appears to be stained with various colors (orange, yellow, green, blue, and purple) fading in and out of the each other. When looked at closely, the colors appear smoky in nature, but never seem to mix completely. History: Darkness and light. Thus is the difference between right and wrong. Darkness and light. Thus is the difference between good and evil. Or at least that is what Prism once thought… Not anymore. Everyday since he was a child it was Prism’s job to fetch the water with the white pail for drinking and pull the weeds with the black gloves from the garden. Such was his roll in his family. His mother used to say, “The light brings the life. And the darkness destroys.” Prism was never really comfortable with this indoctrination, but it was what it was. Why question? Then one night, Prism was sent to fill a bucket of water. When he returned he saw the mess that was left. His mother and father were hunched over dead at the table. A white cup over turned, his father spewed a liquid from the mouth, as black as black could be. White worms crawling on his mother’s plate, her eyes were blanch as if they had been bleached. Above the table floated a being. It wore a mask, half white, half black. It stared at Prism as he stood there silently. Prism was never sure why he was left to live. Such acts were unlike the Kishin. Prism was left alone. He was only 14. After three years of grieving, Prism had made the decision to become stronger. He must. There was no question. This poor bastard actually thought he could become a Death Scythe and do right for the world. There was no better way to do that than to move to the City of Death and join the school. He traveled by train and soon enough found himself enrolled at Shibusen. You see, Prism comes from a long line of weapons like himself. But the shape of his weapon, The Hoop Blade, is distinctive to his family. This unbreakable glass hoop blade has got some some weight to him to throw around, sharp enough to slice straight through stone should it be wielded with that much strength. In human form, it was passed down to fight as if it were a dance. To move as if to compliment the opponents movements and strike when the opportunity arises. The style of dance would be chosen by the offender. As a weapon, Prism was well versed in his talents of transformation due to his father's indoctrination. These lesson, however, was a very different learning environment. In Shibusen, it was no longer a one-on-one training, it was a classroom. However, the Kishin had taught him a lesson. You can’t trust the light and darkness to always be as they seem. The dark poison killed his father, yet the white poison killed his mother. After seeing so much ugly and traumatic destruction, Prism was fed up with the terrible world. He had to reclaim beauty! (A bit dramatic, but he really doesn't seem that way around school) In the end though, the Kishin did leave a mark. With Prism's disturbing past ringing in the back of his brain, he has since suffered from emotional imbalance. Though he appears to have a sound mind and a sound body, he still struggles with having a sound heart and knowing truth from false. He cannot come to terms with, and takes full responsibility for his parent's deaths. He knows that the Kishin had done it... but Prism carried the water in the while pail... and pulled the destroying forces from the garden with the black gloves. The Kishin was sending a message. A message about Prism and his family's failures. Personality: On a regular basis, Prism is quite the pansy. Jumping at anything and overly freaking out when faced with society, a perfect life for Prism would be of a hermit. Seeing as how he must become a Death Scythe, that dream train was long gone. Instead he is tormented by the ever so necessary social interaction that he must endure everyday at Shibusen. Having experienced such a traumatic experience, Prism has had to block himself emotionally from disturbing thoughts and rebuild his personality completely. Because he could not see past the lies of the both light and dark to see the poison, he doubts himself, unable to make peace with himself. However he is so new and different from his old self that he has all but forgotten the past. Prism had changed from a very sheltered and innocent life in the country with few friends, to an independent school boy trying to fit in as well as become a great protector. A whole new scenery. He likes to socialize but has to work on being sociable. Reformist Loner. Prism is very empathetic. In fact, he puts the 'pathetic' in 'empathetic'. He speaks with a soft tone and rarely raises his voice to a shout. Although Prism has a past of sadness, he rarely shows it. But when he does, he can't help but to break down into tears. His tenderheartedness is one of the qualities that make Prism who he is. With the exception of the "Two-toned Kishin" Prism doesn't hold grudges and doesn't care about getting even. This is most likely due to the fact that he has felt true pain in his life. Should he get bullied by someone, he would brush it off and think, "They must be really hurting to desire to inflict pain on someone else." This also ties to how empathetic he is. Having said that, Prism is very protective of his friends. If he cannot dissuade the offender, he will instead attempt to turn their attention onto him. He has two overwhelming goals that drive him though. First, to kill the “Two-toned Kishin” to avenge his parents. Second, to experience beauty that has been so very hard to find in this world. In classes, he puts in a lot of effort and heart, but he requires a lot more practice. He has learned from his teachers that he has great potential with building soul resonance, however it could take some work to unlock this potential. Abilities: Transformation, Glowing Tracers Technique Name: Transformation Effects/Description: Prism bends his back and arms to form a "C" shape and he quickly shifts into a weapon. A circle hoop, the weapon style of his family. This unbreakable glass hoop blade has got some some weight to him to throw around, sharp enough to slice straight through stone should it be wielded with that much strength. Partial transformation isn't one of his tricks. In weapon form, he takes the form of a ring/hoop blade. On the inside is a white steel hoop where the wielder holds. The outside of the hoop is a blade that looks as if it is a glass blade. The glass appears to be stained with various colors (orange, yellow, green, blue, and purple) fading in and out of the each other. When looked at closely, the colors appear smoky in nature, but never seem to mix completely. Technique Name: Glowing Tracers Effects/Description: An ability that happens, upon activation, most often when Prism is moving in his hoop form. As Prism moves, the colors given off by his hoop form start to glow and, in fact, leave tracers that slowly fade. Spin him on Y-axis and he leaves a sphere. When Prism is moved during Glowing Tracers he leaves tracers on where he has been (perceptionally). This move isn't like sub-zero from Mortal Combat where it leaves a single imprint, but instead like running your sight across several lights and watching them turn into lines. This could mean that if you saw the ability from the side (say someone was hooping in a circular pattern in front of the wielder, you could only see the tracers that went up and down. Field of vision with this ability plays a factor. The stronger the resonance, the longer the tracers stay. As Prism is, at max strength(has yet to happen), these tracers could build a complete wall of light. This wall is built by using a lot of the tracer light (that would take a while to fade) to block others from seeing through to the other side. For example, if a person used a smoke bomb to conceal what was going on within the smokey area, so could Prism use this wall to conceal whatever is on the other side. But like tracers you see from your sight running across a light in the dark, this wall does eventually fade. The duration of this ability could last a few seconds, but while I describing maximums, I might as well state that this ability could last up to two minutes. This ability, however, does not seem to take an affect on the wielder, and is most often used to distract targets or block vision in close combat. Tracers: Any space that the object passes through will continue to be occupied by light for a short time. Extra Note: Prism, doesn't usually, but can use this ability in his human form. However, only his fingernails glow and leave tracers, not his entire being like in weapon form. Combat Style: Due to the nature of the Hoop Blade, the most appropriate style for his wielder would be very dance related. Smooth and quick strikes, as well as weight redirection is his fighting style. Rarely does he go on the offense without the opponent striking first. In human form, though he doesn't like to fight like this, Prism uses both his Glowing Tracers ability on his fingernails as well as a dancing style stance to throw off his opponent's focus and attack when available. When Prism isn't close enough for this to work, he either attempts to close in, or get's screwed. In weapon form, he chooses to hold a tactical approach. While he can be thrown to ricochet as well as use his Glowing Tracers ability, he likes to watch how the battle progresses and plan as he goes. He tries to put himself in the situation of the opponent and counter act from there. Miscellaneous Information: He chooses to look androgynous because he doesn't feel gender is important. Rather, he calls it “One of life’s greatest delusions.” Prism lives in an apartment by himself paid for by the money left by his family (a small apartment). He does all of his own cooking. Prism is a good cook. Due to his past, once Prism gains a friend, he will go to no end to protect them. Even at the cost of his life. Strengths:
Weaknesses:
*Due to the concentration required in his combat style, if he were to get distracted by his emotions, Prism is likely to forget about the dance and step wrong. In such a situation, Prism could be very easily overtaken. Roleplay Sample: Prism squinted his eyes, the light too bright to see anything. “Where did that light come from?” he questioned to himself. He started walking forward, his left hand covering his eyes from the light. The light started to dim as he realized that he had stepped out into a courtyard. “Where am I?” now more puzzled than ever. He searched his surroundings for a clue. To his left were a few yards of grass that sloped into a wall of shrubbery, some 8 feet high. To his left was the same lush green sight. In front of him lay a path way, with large green arches overway. The arches were decorated with bright red roses which yet again caused Prism to question his whereabouts. He then began to follow down the path. To his surprise, he couldn't see the end. Yet, with nowhere else to go, he continued. It was about this point that he started to let his mind wander. To wander. To wonder. To bounce, to boil, to blunder. Miss Thunder, did you say, that you carried yourself away, from the place of the space you did once sunder? “Oh why yes,” said the lass, “What else was there to grasp?” As she toiled and her fingers seemed to slip. “You see I nearly fell to my death! So of course there is nothing left. You understand I just needed something to grip.” Then they made their depart, so consciousness restart. And the first thing to hear- “WHO!?!” The voice was loud and seemed to wake Prism from his day dream. “YOU? STOLE!! MY TARTS!!?!” Suddenly, to Prism’s dismay, his pupils readjusted to the scene as he realized that the road had ended. Oh yes, the road had ended and he was now standing at the podium across from a very livid aristocrat, her face as red as the roses he’d past. “M-mm-me?” You see, Prism lacks confidence when he is taken by surprise, and at this exact moment, he was very, very surprised. Her face cooled and turn smug and accusing. “Hmhmhm,” she chortled, “me?” she mocked, “WELL OF COURSE YOU!” she blasted. “Who else would I ever be talking to?!” “I-I-I don’t know” “I, I, I! IS THAT ALL YOU CAN SAY FOR YOURSELF?” She grunted, “Then you admit to stealing my tarts! OFF WITH HIS HEAD!!!” But that had been it. Prism wasn't sure what had just happened, but he had had enough time during this banter to gather enough of what was going on. “Wait!” he protested, “I did no such thing!” “WHAT?” Her face now steaming with smoke as if a cartoon, “You vile creature DARE to call ME a LIAR?!!” “Hmph!” He grunted as he crossed his arms, “I do indeed!” “OFF WITH HIS HEAD!!!” Suddenly a deck of card soldiers came out of nowhere, surrounding him with halberds and pikes. All at once they jumped and attempted to pile on him, but he had dodged. He started to run. He was unsure of his direction, but he knew he had to run. He searched for an escape as he did. There were rose arches and giant chess pieces, but nowhere to hide. But just when he thought there was nowhere else to go, that is when he saw the carriage. Across the back of the carriage written in beautiful French writing, “Lady Thunder.” This had to be his ticket home. He ran as fast as he could, hearing the crowds of card-people just on his heels. Louder and louder. Boom, boom, boom- BOOM-CRACKLE!! Up from his bed Prism jumped with excitement, his heart racing a million a second. The thunder from the storm outside had startled him awake. It had only been a dream. He wiped the matted down white hair from his sweaty forehead, and lurched out of bed to grab a glass of water. partnering Tats edit [2/16/2013] Mod Thread Edited by Tatsuken, Feb 16 2013, 12:10 PM.
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Prism - Prince of Color Purple - The Wordsmith
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| Lammy | Jan 15 2013, 03:24 AM Post #2 |
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Magical Moderator
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Hey there, and welcome to the site, Eyelusion! My name is Lammy, and I'll be your moderator for your first character! Although you've done a great job with the profile so far, there are some things that deserve a closer look. Let's both give it our all! History: This is a good start, but I think you could go into a bit more details in some areas. Did Prism have any childhood friends, or was he mostly a loner? Where exactly did he live? And upon his arrival at Shibusen (just how did he wind up there, exactly? This should also be furthered upon!), did he find the classes difficult and challenging, or relatively easy? What classes does he really excel in, and where could he use some improvement? In short, where is he passing and where is he failing? Or is he your average, run-of-the-mill student? Plus, how did he awaken as a Weapon? This is a big part of your character, and should really be explained upon. And just for clarification, how exactly did the experience teach him not to "trust the light and darkness to always be as they seem"? Also, what did he do for those two years? Just grieve? From what you've put into Miscellaneous Information, it sounds like he learned to care for himself, which should definitely be included in this section; providing a good explanation of his cooking prowess and financial independence. Personality: Again, a could start, but I think a few things should be explained more in depth. For example, what exactly was his old self like? I get the feeling he was rather innocent, but you should definitely clarify this! As a student at Shibusen, is he very sociable, or does he tend to keep to himself around classmates? Also, the motivation to find the Kishin Egg that killed his parents is very obvious, but could you perhaps explain the second goal, to find beauty? Strengths and Weaknesses: Could you explain a little bit about how being easily started might be considered a weakness? Abilities: While you've certain fleshed out what your character is capable of, I think that you forgot to include transforming into a Weapon as one of these abilities (called Full Transformation), which is crucial to the character! In that section, you should describe just how strong this form is, how much it can endure, etc. Many Weapons also have the ability to transform parts of their body into their respective Weapon when fighting own their own, referred to as a Partial Transformation. For example, a whip-type Weapon might transform his or her right arm into a whip, or a sword-type Weapon might transform his or her arm into a blade. Though some of our members have chosen to exclude the ability to Partial Transform in order to make room for more starter abilities, (For Weapons, generally two or three, with at least one being Full Transformation) we might have to be more strict depending on which abilities you choose to keep. So we'll cross that bridge when we get to it. For now, describe the Full Transformation, and include a Partial Transformation if that is what you desire. In the second round of modding, we'll focus more on balancing out this section. But all in all, a great job! Keep up the good work, Eyelusion, and tell me when you've made the necessary changes! Edited by Lammy, Jan 15 2013, 03:25 AM.
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| Eyelusion | Jan 15 2013, 06:29 AM Post #3 |
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Fresh Meat
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Edited to accommodate your requirements |
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Prism - Prince of Color Purple - The Wordsmith
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| Lammy | Jan 16 2013, 03:59 AM Post #4 |
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Magical Moderator
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Great job, Eyelusion! You've managed to fix up the profile really well, but I think that there are just a few more things that should be done before we accept the character! I'm not really seeing the part where he awakens as a Weapon; maybe this happened sometime during his childhood? And could you define just how strong his Weapon form is? Can he cut through steel like hot butter, or can barely slice through wood? Other than that, I applaud how balanced your Abilities section is! Just so we're clear, all that Ultraviolet does currently is leave O-shaped traces of light behind, right? And how long is the duration of Infrared? And I think that's it! But I think you might have meant "The dark poison killed his father, yet the white poison killed his mother." rather than "The dark poison killed his father, yet the white poison killed her father."; or am I mistaken? If it was just an error, I would clean that up as well! Edited by Lammy, Jan 16 2013, 06:56 AM.
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| Eyelusion | Jan 16 2013, 05:43 AM Post #5 |
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Fresh Meat
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Alright, I have given some weapon background. And now about the abilities. Ultraviolet - Yes, kinda, but it isn't restricted to and O-Shape. The weapon doesn't have to be moved so that it leaves a Ring of light. Spin him on Y-axis and he leaves a sphere. When Prism is moved during Ultraviolet he leaves tracers on where he has been (perceptionally). This move isn't like sub-zero from Mortal Combat where it leaves a single imprint, but instead like running your sight across several lights and watching the turn into lines. This could mean that if you saw the ability from the side (say someone was hooping in a circular pattern in front of the wielder, you could only see the tracers that went up and down (I hope that makes sense). Field of vision with this ability plays a factor. Infrared - This move works a lot like Steins ability "Soul Thread Sutures" Where it can last for long periods of time, but take a great deal of concentration. To balance this out and not make it too long, I would draw your attention to his weakness - "Easily Startled." I have also revised the abilities a little bit to make them more defined. That last mistake was because I might have been too sleep deprived to realize that I typed the wrong thing, oops! Do these things meet your expectations? |
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Prism - Prince of Color Purple - The Wordsmith
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| Lammy | Jan 16 2013, 06:54 AM Post #6 |
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Magical Moderator
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Looks all good! Just add that part about Ultra Violet to the actual character sheet and I'll move it to Accepted Characters! Thanks for the cooperation; you've done an excellent job.
Edited by Lammy, Jan 16 2013, 06:55 AM.
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| Eyelusion | Jan 17 2013, 12:06 AM Post #7 |
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Fresh Meat
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Aright, totally edited Ultraviolet with the added bonus of Prism's weapon form. I busted out the crayons for this one my friends. ---So maybe drawing isn't my best talent. |
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Prism - Prince of Color Purple - The Wordsmith
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| Lammy | Jan 17 2013, 01:35 AM Post #8 |
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Magical Moderator
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Well, I'd like to accept the character, but after some suggestions and a bit of input from some of the other moderators, I'm afraid there are just a few more things we need to do! Personality: Is there anything that makes Prism really angry or sad; and if so, how does he show these emotions? Telling us what really makes him tick can help give us a better idea of Prism as a character. Abilities: Infrared isn't allowed since it's labeled as a Soul Resonance and Prism doesn't have a partner. Soul Resonances have to be created and agreed upon between Meister and Weapon; because Soul Resonances aren't strictly the ability of either. For example, Maka and Soul's Soul Resonances come from Maka's desire to become a traditional Scythe Meister like her mother, but if Soul wasn't there, then she couldn't use Traditional Scythe Craft: Witch Hunter. An example of this in practice is given by the differing Soul Resonances with Liz and Patty when partnered with Kid and when partnered with Killik/Fire/Thunder. Liz and Patty, with Kid, can use the Soul Resonance "Death Cannon". But when partnered with Killik, Fire, and Thunder, they maintain their gun forms but shoot out a giant beam of fire and electricity. But Soul Resonances aren't always Meister specific! In the case of Black Star and Tsubaki, their Soul Resonances are taken more from the inherent abilities of the Fey Blade they received from Masamune, as well as Tsubaki's own abilities. Infrared is also potentially overpowered since there are no disclaimers of any other possibilities traditionally seen with ghost-like phasing powers, like if Prism can walk through walls or not. Though this shouldn't be a problem since you're not allowed to have a Soul Resonance without a partner. There is also no mention of any cool down or how many uses it has. As for Ultra Violet, you mention it can be used to light up dark areas, but you also mention the ability has no affect on the wielder. Do other people have to guide them along their path if they were in a pitch black room? There is also no range of time for how long these tracers would last either. And what exactly do you mean by "a wall of light"; does it eventually reach a point where it's so bright that it blinds people that try to look at Prism from a distance? There is also no description of Prism's Weapon form in his abilities section, which is definitely needed; most people only read the Abilities and maybe one other section (most often Personality) when looking at a profile while searching for a partner. You are allowed to just copy and paste the description from the description section and put it into the Transformation ability; though you seem to have put specifics of his Weapon form in his history rather than in the ability where he transforms into the weapon! Be sure to fix this. And remember! Whatever isn't written down in abilities you cannot do. Combat Style: A little bit too short; while it's good you included how his Meister should be using him, there's not really a keen description as to how he interacts with his Meister while in Weapon form, or how Prism fights on his own, other than the fact that he will not attack first. For example, you mention he can be ricocheted in the Strengths section, so that should be reflected here. You've also done well to include that a recommended fighting style would be similar to a dance, which adds in movement that might be distracting to an opponent, and with the added glow of Prism's Weapon form, this might even make an opponent have quite a tough time staying focused. Talk about this! I think that once you've been very clear in adding in these changes, we'll be ready. Thanks for being so patient! |
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| Eyelusion | Jan 17 2013, 03:35 AM Post #9 |
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Fresh Meat
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Alright, how did I do this time? |
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Prism - Prince of Color Purple - The Wordsmith
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| Lammy | Jan 17 2013, 04:16 AM Post #10 |
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Magical Moderator
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Accepted! Thanks for being so patient with us, Eye. It's obvious that you've tried your best on this application. |
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