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Friday Night Rage #18; 5.23.14
Topic Started: May 25 2014, 03:02 PM (178 Views)
Brutalikus
Member Avatar
The Unremarkable
Posted ImageLive from St. Louis, Missouri.
Friday, May 23rd 2014

----------------------------------
The show opened with fireworks, smoke and a light display set to the tune of "Runnin' Wild” by Airbourne.


The crowd cheered as cameras panned the arena, picking up several of the more memorable signs on display:

"Bless Em By Guillotine Leg Drop!"

"J-Mo For Rage Champ Brah!"

“Don't Kill Me Deathstalker! D:"

As always, the B.E.A.R.D. boys are also in attendance.

The show begins by the cameras swinging to ringside to show Tom and Dexter and a quick shot of the capacity crowd as “Immortal” by War Of Ages hits and the crowd goes crazy for the emerging Justin Moreno, who looks fired up as he makes his way to the ring.

Tom Hartman: “Justin Moreno, one happy guy tonight, wouldn’t you say, Dex?”

Dexter Finch: “Must be something in his Happy Meal.”

Tom Hartman: “Well, maybe. But it could also be his big win on last Rage which catapulted him to the top of the heap here on Rage as far as title shots are concerned.”

Dexter Finch: “They didn’t use a real catapult, did they? That sounds dangerous, Tom.”

Moreno slaps hands with fans before entering the ring, a huge smile on his face.

Cordelia Stewart: “Ladies and gentlemen, the new #1 contender to the St. Louis Rage Title, JUSTIN MORENO!!”

Moreno nods in approval, soaking in the ovation from the crowd before getting a mic, “Immortal” fading out. The crowd has already begun a “MO-REE-NO!” chant as Justin raises the mic to his lips.

Justin Moreno: “Bros..and ladies, what a difference a few weeks make. At one point, I was out here, fighting for life against that monster Deathstalker and that pain in the ass Vincent Delerious, and now, now I’m the #1 contender to the Rage Title! I couldn’t believe it myself at first!”

Moreno pauses to take in some more cheers before continuing.

Justin Moreno: “But if I may be serious for a moment, I never thought I’d ever reach this point again. I’ve gone through hell and back, but I’m glad, damn glad, that through your love and support, I have my redemption I’ve been seeking in my life and career. Thank you very mu-“

HOLD UP, WAIT A MINUTE, PUT A LITTLE LOVE IN IT!

“Luv Addict” by Family Force 5 brings out the St. Louis Rage Champion, Leonard Luv, along with Inga Lovegood and Brutus. Luv surveys Moreno before Luv Strutting down the ramp to the ring. He plants a kiss on Inga before entering the ring. He surveys Moreno again, this time with a chuckle, before grabbing a mic, his music fading into the chorus of boos from the crowd.

Leonard Luv: “I’m sorry, did someone touch the dial on their television? Is this some kind of Hallmark movie moment I interrupted? I hope so, because I’m sure all of these people, MY people, were about 10 seconds or so away from puking up whatever greasy slop they bought at the concession stand.”

Justin Moreno: “Hello, Luv.”

Leonard Luv: “Yeah, whatever.”

Justin Moreno: “Have a problem with what I said, broseph?”

Luv just looks at Moreno, shaking his head in disgust.

Leonard Luv: “First off, speak English. Second, my problem with you is simple, Moreno. You think you can come out here and fool these people into having sympathy for you, trying to gain as much support as you can, but these people, they don’t know the real Justin Moreno. He’s not this born again Christian, Youth Minister asshat he claims to be.”

Justin Moreno: “You have a problem that I believe in God? I say get in line with the rest of the haters.”

Leonard Luv: “Hey now, this is America, you can believe whatever you want to believe, but all of us in the back, we know you’re not this squeaky clean guy. I mean, when you think about it, Moreno, your life, it’s all been about failed saves. You couldn’t save your mediocre career, you came here because your goofy fruit loving friend told you to. Hell, it took the man upstairs to save your girlfriend. Then again, I’m sure that wasn’t the first time she’s been left disappointed by you, right? You left her hanging a few times I’m sure, right “broseph’?”

Moreno grits his teeth.

Justin Moreno: “Luv, you keep my personal life out of this. This is about you, me, and that championship.”

Leonard Luv: “Ooh, touchy I see. Speaking of this title, how did it feel when your skull collided with it at the end of the last show?”

Justin Moreno: “Is that the best you got, Luv? I’ve made a career out of proving people wrong, what’s going to make this time any different?”

Leonard Luv: “Because you’ve never faced anybody like me, Moreno. Your life, inside this ring, out of it, its fair game as far as I’m concerned. Hell, maybe when this is all said and done you’ll go back to your old ways, maybe shoot up with Allison, or maybe drink some booze with your pal Riley.”

Justin Moreno: “Don’t make this personal, Luv.”

Leonard Luv: “A little late for that, isn’t it? Let me ask you, Mr. Holier Than Thou, you want to flaunt the fact you were saved? Well who is going to save you from me?”

Justin Moreno: “I’ve got all the help I need on my side.”

Leonard Luv: “Really now? Let’s test that theory, shall we?”

Just as it seems the two men are about to come to blowswith Brutus seemingly getting ready to back Luv up, “Cochise” by Audioslave brings out Darius Jackson, who stops midway down the ramp to the ring.

Darius Jackson: “Goddamn it, it seems like every show I’m out here breaking up some kind of fight. Pisses me the hell off. I’ll make this simple. Tonight, as a fellow black man like myself might say “Holla, playa” because we’re going to have ourselves a tag team match involving you two tonight!”

The crowd roars with approval.

Darius Jackson: “You guys have until later tonight to choose your tag partners. Until then, I suggest you both get ready, and have yourselves a fine evening.”

“Cochise” hits again as Darius turns to leave, Luv smirking at Moreno before raising the championship high. As Darius begins up the ramp, his music stops and the Jumbo-Tron lights up to show a video:

Quote:
 
The video shows a younger Darius Jackson competing in Japan a few years prior and he appears to be celebrating a victory with a smile wide across his face as he shouts about going back to America to become a world champion. Most importantly, both of his eyes appear to be working properly. Then when Darius turns around, a young paint-less Kokushi is right behind him and sprays a black mist straight at Darius! The audience reacts in shock as Darius instinctively turns, the mist only catching one of his eyes as he falls to the mat screaming in pain. Medical officials run to the ring to aid him as the young man later known as Kokushi smiles malevolently and exits the ring. This moment would be the last time Darius would appear as an active wrestler.


Darius' one good eye contorts in rage as he screams out loud, grabbing the nearby camera man's camera and tossing it across the stage in anger as he begins to uncharacteristically yell about how he is going to kill that "Mother f*cker."

Tom Hartman: We apologize for the reaction from our commissioner Darius Jackson folks. That disturbing video we just witnessed seems to have touched a nerve, so I think now is a good time for a commercial break...

_____________________________
***COMMERCIAL BREAK***
_____________________________


The heavy breathing of Billy Way is audible to the fans as the camera zooms in on the distortion picture of his face in the titantron as the song, "Dressed to Digress"(Nero remix) blares out of the speakers. As soon as the verse is heard, Billy Way comes out of the curtains with a sadistic smile imprinted on his face and another briefcase in hand. He starts running his fingers all over the curves of his body before pelvis thrusting. Billy licks his lips, anxious to get into the ring before dancing(yes dancing!) his way to the ring. Once he's close to the ring, he gets a running start and slides under the ropes like Edge before humping the mat. He then gets up and tries to "interact" with the referee and the announcer, both of them just pushing him away as he snags the microphone away from the ring announcer an begins to breath into the microphone.

The Billy Way: Heh...heh...hehehehehe! You are probably wondering what I am doing out here tonight after receiving one of the most ORGASMIC beatings of my life from that big sexy beast Komodo a couple weeks ago. But as much as I'd love to stay forever and dance with him, it has come to my attention that there is plenty more “talent” on the Rage roster that I am just itching to have a dance with! After all, THE Billy Way is not a one beast man after all baby, especially when you have so much delighful anger and aggression on the roster from people like Josh Hominick, The Gentlemen of Fortune, The Sisters of Salvation, Elite, DDV and oh so many more! And I've been told that Mr. dark chocolate himself Darius Jackson has an interesting opportunity in store for me should I win tonight, so tonight, I've got a briefcase with the sum of $5000- don't ask me how I got it- just for you Komodo if you want to show me one more good time for old times sake- for now that is hehe. What do you say baby? Want to get weird?

It takes several long seconds, but eventually ‘Welcome To The Masquerade’ by Thousand Foot Krutch blasts out and Komodo walks out and stands at the top of the ramp. He stands there and stares out at the crowd in an intimidating fashion before screwing his face up at them and slowly walking down to the ring. On his way to the ring the crowd throw insalts at him but he doesn’t react at all. He gets to the ring when suddenly The Billy Way comes diving through the ropes like a maniac, slamming the briefcase straight into Komodo's face with the force of a makeshift suicide dive!


MATCH 1 – No DQ Match
The Billy Way vs. Komodo
_____________________________


Tom Hartman: Woah look at Billy go! I'm being told that this match has been ruled a no disqualification match with no count outs as well.

On the outside The Billy Way is having a hell of a time as he slams the metal briefcase over Komodo's back several times and then places it under Komodo's face and lands a knee drop across the back of the hulking man's neck that drives him face first into the briefcase! The Billy Way then runs over to the barricade and runs back towards Komodo looking to drive his face into the briefcase with a running DDT, but Komodo catches him and slams him back first into the briefcase instead with a big time spear! The Billy is cackling in pain and delight as Komodo shakes out the cobwebs and starts to stomp away at him and then picks The Billy up effortlessly onto his shoulder and rams him face first into the turnbuckle post nearby! Komodo then reaches over into the audience and swipes one of the chairs away from the fans at ringiside and then drives it straight into The Billy's back a couple times before standing it up on the outside and looking to throw The Billy into it with a fallaway slam, but the Billy slips out the back and lands a hangman's neckbreaker on Komodo. Komodo starts to get up with the aid of the chair, but he doesn't get far as the Billy Way has climbed up on the apron by this point and dives off the apron with a leg drop that drops Komodo face first on the chair as the remains of the chair are absolutely decimated on impact!

Tom Hartman: Good lord what a leg drop! Komodo may be a beast, but I don't think he can even withstand the assault that The Billy Way is delivering tonight. For once, it looks like he is aiming to actually win instead of just to satisfy his unusual vices.

Dexter Finch: HEY! That's a waste of a perfectly good chair! I could have sat on that you know! You owe me! So maybe I should just take a look at that fancy briefcase....

Tom Hartman: Sit down Dex... that isn't your money in the briefcase, so hands off.

Dexter Finch: Wait,. What? There is money in it? I just was going to take the briefcase because I like how shiny it is.

With Komodo down, The Billy Way starts rooting around under the ring, pulling out a variety of objects including a table, a crate filled with all sorts of weird crap like a taxidermied squirl statue, a couple of action figures of the Billy Way and Komodo, a pair of nunchuks made out of legs of all things, and another weird maniquen with it's body parts all mismatched in distrubing body horror. By the time he is done however, Komodo grabs the frame of the broken chair and wraps it around The Billy Way's neck, yanking him backwards and bludgeoning him with stiff clothesline to the back of the nect. Komodo slides the table into the ring and then goes to the mystery crate himself, pulling out a Mr. Potato Head toy and slamming it into The Billy Way's skull as soon as he rises to his knees! Komodo then decides to add insult to injury by grabbing one of the potato head ears after the parts scatter all over the place and he tries to jam it violently into the Billy Way's ear, succeeding at first at the Billy cries out in pain, but The Billy Way manages to reach inside the box and pull out a glass ant farm case and slams it against Komodo's face! All sorts of glass, dirt and ants rain down onto Komodo's face as he suffered the impact but luckily his mask prevented a lot of the damage. The Billy Way presses his advantage by grabbing the lego nunchuks as he starts to whip them around his body like a kun fu star and then slams them on Komodo's back several times before wrapping them around Komodo's neck to strangle him. Komodo eventually fights him away with backwards headbutts to The Billy's face and then he whips The Billy over his head to make him land back first on the box full of assorted crap, destroy the taxidermied squirrel and a bunch of other stuff in the box.

Dexter Finch: Toys! Alright! This is quite possibly the best match ever!

Komodo then rolls Billy back into the ring and slides in with the manequin, slamming the weird object over Billy's back a couple of time and then he sets up the table Komodo picks The Billy Way up and attempts to drive him through the table with a powerbomb but The Billy Way counters with the Simply Awesome Buster (sitout facebuster) in the center of the ring! Billy is rolling with the momentum now and runs the ropes to hit the Feel This (corkscrew flying forearm smash) and then runs at Komodo to do it again, but Komodo catches him and drives him down onto his knee with the Thug 4 Hire (chokeslam backbreaker)! Komodo again shakes out the cobwebs and goes for the pin!

… One

… Two

… Th-No! The Billy Way kicks out!


Komodo sits up with his hands on his hips and drags The Billy Way up with him, pressing him into the air with a gorilla press and looking to launch The Billy Way out of the ring mercilessly like he did last time they fought, except this time The Billy Way slips out of his grip and clocks Komodo in the head with a Billion Dollar Kick (roundhouse kick) and then another one that finally gets Komodo to lay down on the table near the upper right corner in a daze. The Billy Way slams the manequin on Komodo's chest a couple of times and then lays it across his stomach as he gets a sick look in his face and climbs the turnbuckle, diving off and landing the Way of the Future (shooting star leg drop) driving Komodo through the table! The Billy goes for the pin!

… One

… Two

… Three!


Cordelia Stewart: Here is your winner, The Billy Way!

Tom Hartman: He did it! He beat Komodo!

Dexter Finch: I guess he really is good at wrestling when he tries to actually win.

The Billy Way straddles Komodo's body for a moment before celebrating his victory in the ring while Komodo slowly rolls to the outside and grabs the briefcase left near the ramp, taking his money and leaving.


_____________________________
***SCENE FADES TO BACKSTAGE***
_____________________________


We open in the Gentlemen Of Fortune locker room, which that in itself draws the ire of the crowd. Deacon Black and Charles Williams are drinking tea, as AUB sits talking with Jessie Rae. Black puts down his cup of tea as The Brutalion enter the scene.

Deacon Black: “Gentlemen, allow me to discuss business on behalf of my colleague, James Galleon.”

Keith Battle: “Where is Galleon anyways? Let’s hope this includes something for my friend here.

Oti Amalu: “I want at that bastard, Hominick, for eliminating me from that battle royal.”

Deacon Black: “I can assure you, Galleon knows of this, and I sympathize with your feelings, as I too was eliminating by that foul mouth breather, Hominick, but we don’t just get revenge around here, Oti, we destroy whoever is foolish enough to stand in our way.”

Oti Amalu: “Sounds interesting.”

Deacon Black: “I figured you’d say that. That’s why tonight, we’re assigning the US Air Force to join you during your match.”

Battle and Amalu look pissed.

Oti Amalu: “We don’t need their help.”

Keith Battle: “Yeah, we’ve got this handled. Kind of a little ticked off you don’t feel the same way.”

Deacon Black: “Listen, gentlemen, while I can respect your decision, this is final. You do want Hominick to pay, don’t you?”

Keith Battle: “Definitely. Tell Galleon when you see him, we know the deal.”

Oti Amalu: “Just have a bit more faith in us next time. You guys employed us to do a job and we don't need any of those other morons to help us.”

Deacon Black: “Noted, yes, very well.”

The Brutalion leave as Black returns to his tea and some conversation with Williams.

_____________________________
***VIGNETTE***
_____________________________


We open with the sounds of ringing phones, PA systems calling for doctors, as we’re inside a hospital, late at night.

We round a hall, where a mental health worker sits with a man, who is shaking, his suspenders and boots covered in blood. She tries to comfort the man.

Mental Health Worker: “My name is Shirley Wells. Tell me, what is your name.”

Man: “Frank..Frank Sherman.”

Shirley: “Now Frank, tell me again, what did you see?”

Frank: “I..I can’t. T-t-too gruesome. Too awful.”

Shirley: “Frank, if you don’t tell us, we can’t help you.”

Frank: “I..I was just hunting with my friend, Todd. It was going alright..until IT showed up.”

Shirley: “It? What do you mean?”

Frank: “You wouldn’t understand. It was a hideous creature, grabbed my friend by the throat, and..”

Shirley: “And?”

The man really begins to shake, his eyes darting back and forth. He lets out a scream.

Frank: “I TRIED TO SAVE HIM! I DID, I REALLY DID! BUT THIS THING, IT WAS JUST TOO BIG, TOO MEAN, TOO SCARY! IT THROTTLED HIM, KILLED HIM IN FRONT OF MY VERY EYES!”

Shirley: “Calm down, Frank. It’s ok.”

Suddenly, the lights in the room flicker and go out, as we hear screams outside.

Frank: “What was that?”

Shirley: “Must be a thunderstorm.”

Frank turns and suddenly begins screaming yet again, as nearby sits a bloody mask. The lights return to normal as Shirley tries to comfort Frank again, calling for male nurses to hold him down for a shot as his screams are muffled under the blood that begins flowing onto the screen. We see the words as they form in deep purple.

UMBRA IS COMING.


_____________________________
***COMMERCIAL BREAK***
_____________________________


MATCH 2 –
Sierra Starr vs. Blaze
_____________________________


Ahahahahahaha!

The evil laughter of Sierra begins to blare across the speakers of the arena acompanied by “Strike Back” by We as Human. Once the vocals start at the 9 second mark, Sierra then pushes through the curtain and makes her way onto the top of the ramp followed closely by Kendra Rayne, their titles securly around their waists and the Legion of Doom-esque shoulder pads on as well. Both women walk down to the ring paying little attention to the mixed reaction from the crowd when “Psychosocial” by Slipknot starts and Blaze comes out with a lighter in her hand, flicking it on and off as she walks down the ramp and avoiding people's gazes followed by Gemini who is bouncing around all goofy-like and telling the audience about how Blaze is going to kick “that blonde bimbo's” ass. Climbing up on the apron she finally looks at the crowd and places the lighter up by her mouth. Tilting her head up she spits something from her mouth, which catches flame and makes it look as if she breathed fire, but this time Sierra isn't intimidated. Once the spectacle is over she puts the lighter in her pocket and enters the ring to meet Sierra while Gemini is already spouting trash talk at Kendra, on the outside trying to get under her skin right from the word “go”.


Sierra and Blaze walk up to the center of the ring and Sierra starts to laugh, saying, “This is my opponent? Really? Don't make me laugh! This is an insult” but her cockiness causes her the early disadvantage as Blaze suddenly takes Sierra over with a side headlock takedown! The two start chain wrestling with Sierra snapping on a headscissors, but Blaze rolls into a jacknife pin, then Sierra rolls out from under her with a gutwrench applied, looking for a gutwrench suplex bu the surprisingly agile Blaze does a bit of a cartwheel flip out of it and then ducks a clothesline attempt from Sierra and then jumps onto Sierra's back for a sleeperhold as the audience applauds their technical abilities. Sierra stumbles in the sleeper for a few seconds before slamming Blaze over her head to the mat with a high impact snapmare and then a snap kick to the back before running the ropes and clobbering Blaze in the back of the head with a vicious running knee! Sierra is getting mean now as she grabs Blaze by the hair and yanks her to her feet, putting her into a side headlock and then spinning around and going for a german suplex, but Blaze rolls through into a victory roll for a quick pin!

… One

… Tw-Kickout!


Sierra lunges back at Blaze, but Blaze gets in an arm wrench instead and quickly runs up the lower right turnbuckle with Sierra's and jumps off the second turnbuckle looking for somwhat of a flying arm breaker tornado DDT combo, but Sierra counters, dropping Blaze to her back and looking to lock in the Queen of Mean (sharpshooter), but Blaze quickly shimmies to the ropes, forcing Sierra to break in frustration.

Dexter Finch: These ladies can wrestle! I bet they could even kick your butt Tom!

Tom Hartman: Thanks Dex and I'd rather not deny that out of fear for my own health. Blaze especially is impressing me knew Sierra is quite possibly one of the best technical wrestlers around, but I'm pleasantly surprised to see Blaze holding her own so well and wait a minute, what's this?

Gemini and Kendra are now getting into dangerously close proximity on the outside near the announce tables as they are both cheering for their respective team mates and it eventually desolves into an argument between the two that causes Kendra to clinch her fist in anger. Inside the ring, Sierra goes to grab Blaze's feet, yanking her upwards with authority, but Blaze lands on her feet! Sierra looks surprised by how agile Blaze is and goes for a big time Broken Dreams (discuss clothesline), but Blaze ducks and drives her shoulder into Sierra, flipping her over the top rope! Sierra lands on the apron however and when Blaze turns around, but Sierra pulls her into a knee to the gut and weaves Blaze through the top two ropes and hits a modified cutter to Blaze that guillotines her off the second rope! Blaze slingshots back holding her throat while Sierra drops to the floor right in front of the arguing Blaze and Kendra and she starts to participate in the argument as well while Gemini puts up her dukes and starts spouting claims, “I'll take ya both on ya big blonde bimbos! Put up your dukes, unless you is chicken!” Sierra and Kendra start advancing on Gemini when suddenly Blaze comes suicide diving through the ropes, knocking both of the Sisters of Salvation back into the announce tables!

Kendra especially is growing very impatient with the Daughters of Darkness and starts advancing on Blaze this time, only to lunge backwards when Blaze suddenly whips out a lighter and spits mist into it, making it look like she is breathing a fire ball straight at Kendra! The audience goes into awe as the small pyro display keeps Kendra at bay, but it doesn't help with Sierra who then comes in and spears the hell out of blaze on the floor! Gemini gets close and starts insulting the hell out of Sierra which causes Sierra to get fed up this time, shoving Gemini backwards! Sierra then rolls Blaze back into the ring and then hits the rockSTARR (lifting double underhook facebuster) on Blaze in the center of the ring, going for the pin!

… One

… Two

… Th-No! Blaze kicks out!


Tom Hartman: I don't believe it! She kicked out!

Dexter Finch: I still can't believe she's not butter! You see what I did there Tom?

Sierra is clearly growing frustrated with Blaze's reilience as she goes to lock in the Barbie Breaker (Modified inverted surfboard into a double wrist lock), but Blaze counters out and before Sierra knows it, she is locked in the Raging Flames (crossface) instead! Sierra screams out in pain, though she still has plenty of ring awareness as she shuffles her legs around and eventually gets her leg onto the bottom rope with the assistance of Kendra who puts it there. The referee goes to admonish Kendra, but he doesn't even have a chance as here comes Gemini hitting a thesz press out on the floor! In the ring, Blaze goes for a stinger splash on Sierra in the corner, but Sierra dodges and runs the ropes looking for her Starry Knight (bicycle kick) off the rebound but Blaze somehow manages to grab her and roll her into a small package!

… One

… Two

… Three!


Cordelia Stewart: Here is your winner, Blaze!

Blaze quickly slides out of the ring to meet Gemini over by the ramp as Sierra returns to her knees and starts slamming the mat in anger while Kendra holds her head on the outside and gives the Daughters a deathstare as they move back up the ramp, choosing to live to fight another day.



_____________________________
***SCENE FADES TO BACKSTAGE***
_____________________________


We cut to the South Texas Bulldogs, Ricky and Bobbie Tisdale, walking backstage. They come upon The Hitmen and The Super Anime Squad, snickering to themselves about something. The Bulldogs step right in between them, sizing up The Hitmen.

Ricky Tisdale: “Find something funny, chump?”

Bobbie Tisdale: “We some kind of joke to you?”

Cormac Cobbs: Now that you mention it, I do find it kinda funny how you guys are the laughingstock of the tag team division. I mean how bad do you need to be for those pricks in the Gentlemen of Fortune not to want you anyways, right BB?

BB Damage: Sort of. I hear the rich Southern boy who married his whore sister did hire these guys, but that makes things that much funnier!

Rickie Tisdale: What did you just say punk?!

Just then the Ramos brothers jump to their feet and get inbetween the South Texas Bulldogs and the Hitmen.

Kalei Ramos: “Man, you guys are as intense as a boss battle in Earthbound.”

Kalino Ramos: “No, they’re far more intense, like when you first see Sephiroth in Final Fantasy VII.”

Rosario Lopez: “Guys, listen, chill, there’s no reason to go all Parappa The Rapper up in here.”

Ricky Tisdale: “What the hell are you 3 idiots talking about?”

Bobbie Tisdale: “Go back to your grandma’s basement, our problem isn’t with you anyways.”

They turn their attention back to The Hitmen.

Ricky Tisdale: “You two like to laugh so much, how about next Rage we give you two something to laugh about.”

Bobbie Tisdale: “Like your mangled bodies at the bottom of our boots!”

BB Damage: “You guys are on!”

Cormac Cobbs: “Yeah, what he said!”

Ricky Tisdale: “It’s your funeral. Let’s go, Bobbie.”

With a sneer to everyone around them, the South Texas Bulldogs continue on their way. BB Damage to turns to the Super Anime Squad.

BB Damage: “Thanks for helping us out back there, big help.”

Cormac Cobbs: “Yeah, we “really” appreciate it.

Rosario Lopez: “What were we supposed to do? There’s no Konami Code for life, boys.”

The Squad leave as the debate over Earthbound and Final Fantasy VII begins, leaving The Hitmen scratching their heads.


_____________________________
***VIGNETTE***
_____________________________


Screams of excitement from a red carpet crowd. The flashbulbs of the paparazzi. A stretch limo pulls up as the crowd builds with excitement.

Narrator: “There have been blockbusters, truly legendary films over the years.”

The limo door is opened as we see the driver standing there, the crowd going crazy.

Narrator: “There have been leading ladies, leading men, action heroes, and villains that have been created through the beauty of the silver screen.”

We see a pair of designer shoes planted onto the red carpet before this figure stands up, the crowd really going nuts.

Narrator “Stallone. DeNiro. Nicholson. All of them Hollywood legends, but none can hold a candle to the one who simply calls himself..”

Fixing his hair in a small mirror, giving himself a ravishing look through pursed lips is Mikey Mitchell. He turns to us with a smug look.

Mikey Mitchell: “Marvelous.”

Mitchell continues his walk down the red carpet as flashbulbs go off and the screen has the following on it:

“MARVELOUS” MIKEY MITCHELL ARRIVES ON THE NEXT RAGE!


_____________________________
***COMMERCIAL BREAK***
_____________________________



MATCH 3 –
DDV vs. Sebastian Jankowkski vs. Acer Stone
_____________________________


As soon as the drum hits the lights turn off, and we can hear the entrance of "Bulls on Parade" made by Rage Against The Machine. After the guitar riff solo starts, white and red lights start to turn on in the rhythm of a song. Finally, all the lights are on and we can see Sebastian Jankowski standing at the arena's entrance, standing and acting like he has a microphone, and yells with the fans:"Come wit it now!" He makes his way to the ring doing hand gestures that mimic the lyrics of the song and then goes to each of the turnbuckles, playing to the crowd and backflipping off them as ‘Invincible’ by Adelitas Way hits and Acer Stone runs out from the back looking pumped up and energetic. He heads down the ramp and punches the air three times as red pyros go off at the top of the ramp behind him. Acer heads over to the fans and slaps hands with them as he gets to the ring while the instrumental opening of P.O.D.s "Boom" rings through the arena as "Hoochiah" rings through the speakers as Danny De Vries pulls back the curtain and takes a few steps. He stops, stares hard at the ring and looks around at the crowd, then shouts ‘D-D-V!’ as he pumps his right fist into the air twice and then punches both fists into the air diagonally from his body, holding them in a ‘V’ shape for a few seconds. De Vries then slides into the ring meeting his opponents as all three men exchange handshakes and assure he each other that though they have a lot of respect for each other, they all intend to bring it tonight!

Dexter Finch: Triple threats are fun in bed and in the ring!

Tom Hartman: Not sure what you mean by that, but you are right that with these bright young stars all vying for the High Octane title that this one is going to be one hell of a treat. Speaking of which, Darius announced last week that this match would determine the order in which these three will get a High Octane title shot as they are all worthy of #1 contendership to him.I think it is safe to say that the winner of this match is going to be the first one who gets a chance to get even with Charles Williams.

The three young stars of the future circle at a quick pace waiting for the others to make a move. Sebastian decides to be the first to make a move, nodding to Acer briefly before thrusting a spinning back kick at DDV, but DDV catches Seb's foot and before he knows what is going on, Acer capitalizes with an enzuigiri to the back of DDV's head. Seb vaults off DDV's back and goes for a leg lariat but Acer ducks and goes to vault off DDV's back himself, but DDV suddenly rolls over and catches Acer's leg as he's falling transitioning him impressively into an STF, but it doesn't last long as Seb hits a springboard leg drop across the back of DDV's neck falling on the pile of guys there. Seb pulls DDV up and hits a russian leg sweep and then runs the ropes for some sort of grounded attack on DDV when Acer cuts him off with a crossbody for a short one count pin before Seb rolls through it into position for a powerslam on Acer. Seb tries to reorient himself for a moment once he rolls back to his feet, but that moment is a moment too much as DDV gets back up and punts Acer so hard in the stomach that he launches up out of Seb's arms, flies over Seb's head and lands crotch first on the ropes! Acer falls down to the apron in pain as DDV charges Seb, but Seb pops DDV up over the ropes with his shoulder, causing DDV to land on the apron right next to Acer. Seb goes to punch DDV, but DDV blocks and pulls Seb out to the apron with them, putting DDV in the middle between Seb and Acer. DDV kicks Seb in the gut and goes for an apron DDT, but Seb shoves DDV back towards Acer who hits a front dropkick with so much force that it launches DDV into Seb with an inadvertant spear to Seb that drives both of them off the apron and to the floor hard! With both Seb and DDV on the ground, Acer pumps his fist into the air and ascends to the top of one of the ramp-side turnbuckles, waiting for DDV and Seb to reach their feet before diving at them and taking all three out with a beautiful corkscrew plancha!

Dexter Finch: Woo-hoo! That Acer guy looks like an action figure flying around like that!

Tom Hartman: Wow! We knew this one was going to be a high flying spectacle and these guys are demonstrating why they have all the potential in the world to be champions!

Acer is the first back to his feet, pumping his fist into the air a couple times to a nice cheer and then he slides the lighter of his opponents, Seb, back into the ring and climbs the turnbuckle once again, measuring Seb up for a leaping Stone Cutter (axe kick), but Seb catches him in mid air and drives Acer down with a powerbomb that has enough force to stumble Seb back as well, causing Acer to bend his back in pain! DDV slides back into the fray and hits a running STO on Seb and then pulls him onto his shoulders, dropping him for the Breathless fireman's carry gutbuster! Seb falls to the mat in pain as DDV motions to the sky, showing that he is intending to fly now too! He climbs the upper right buckle and readies for a the Stargazer (shooting star press), but Acer runs the ropes, causing DDV to fall crotch first on the buckle and then runs to the lower left corner where he then runs full speed across the ring and jumps off Seb's back this time in a somewhat poetry-in-motion style front dropkick that catches DDV square in the chest! DDV is rocking really badly after that hit and almost falls backwards to the outside the ring, but he manages to keep himself rooted just enough ontop of the top turnbuckle. Acer stumble back to his feet right into Seb who hits the Polish Stunner (back kick into stunner) that launches Acer back a DDV and drapes Acer's arms off the same turnbuckle DDV is sitting on. Seb then gets a smirk on his face and then runs at Acer, pretty much walking up Acer's chest and leaps onto DDV's shoulder for an incredible frankensteiner- but DDV catches him and throws Seb across the ring with incredible strength with a Strong Bomb (sheer drop powerbomb) from the top turnbuckle!

Crowd: Holy Shit! Holy Shit!

Dexter Finch: Holy Sh*t is right! Did you hear that impact?

Seb rolls to the outside in a heap after getting the wind knocked out of him on impact and Acer flips at DDV, nailing him with a pele kick that once again has DDV teetering on the top turnbuckle. Acer then climbs the turnbuckle gingerly and goes for the frankensteiner himself, but again DDV manages to catch him in a powerbomb position! This time it is different however as DDV wraps Acer's legs around his head and then hops down to the mat, walking to the center of the ring and locking in the Boston Stronghold (elevated cloverleaf stretch muffler)! DDV sits on Acer's back with this vicious hold applied as Acer tries to fight out of it, but he has nowhere to go! He doesn't see Seb sliding back into the ring to break it up, but he is just a smidgen too late as Acer reluctantly starts to tap out!

Cordelia Stewart: Here is your winner, DDV!

“Boom” kicks back up as Seb puts his head down on the mat, knowing how close he came to saving the match and when he looks up, DDV is offering him a hand in sportsmanship. Seb looks at it for a few moment before allowing DDV to help him up as the two shake hands and then help Acer up, shaking hands with him as well before Seb and Acer reluctantly leave the ring, allowing their friend to celebrate his victory, but with a twinge of disappointment that they weren't in his shoes.


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***SCENE FADES TO BACKSTAGE***
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We go backstage to find the camera centered on resident reporter Ricky Diamond clad in his reporter gear.

Ricky Diamond: Ladies and l-adies (winking), my guest tonight is a dashingly handsome specimin that hails directly from my 2nd favorite Slim Jim commercials... no he is sadly not the Macho Man- may he rest in peace- but he is still damn sexy. He is single by the way ladies, he is El Jimo la Sasquaaaaaastch!

The camera moves over to find Jim decked out in his sombrero and pancho as he begins to make gutteral noises as subtiles appear on screen to translate(the subtitles also continue long past the time Jim stops talking as he sits and looks at his watch).

El Jim: ¡GRRRRR! ¡Guroff gee orph groff! Ooorgrok grrrroff goff snofff mcgofffff!
-Translation from Sasquatch to Spanish to English then to Japanese and then back to English again:- (Nakagainan Zilla, my old nemesis! How dare you show your face on my show you villainous curr! I thought you learned your lesson when I struck you down from the heavens with a mighty blow from my hammer of grand delusions, but I appear that the guardian of the underworld has set you free once again you slimey fiend! But no this lizard; I am El Jimo la Sasquatcho! Me and my simian companion Ricardo the Diamondo will put an end to your villainy and send you to the depths of Hades itself! )

Ricky Diamond: Well said, El Jimo.

Jessie Rae: Oh Ricardo….

As if things couldn’t get more strange, next Ambrose Ulysses Beaurreguarde’s wife, “The Darlin’ of Dixie”” Miss Jessie Rae.

Ricky Diamond: Holy BOOBS-I mean, hello Miss Jessie (jn a corny manly voice). I think you are looking for my Half Mexican Step Brother Twice Removed and three times divorced…. Long story.

Jessie Rae: Oh you ahre a funneh one aint you? Ah em sorry about the way I have treated you and your equally handsome brotha lately. Ah had to keep up appearances in front of mine mean old husband Ambrose, ya understand? In fact, I think you and y’are “brothah” are devilishly handsome with those fine chizzeled abs, manly beards and of course (reaching down below the camera to touch apart of Ricky that makes his eyes go wide with pleasure) your other fine appendages. What do you sayh to goin’ back to y’are room and havin’ a lil’ fun?

Ricky Diamond: (Squeeling in delight) I think I love you! Take me my sweet! Mind the interviewing El Jimo!

With that, Ricky walks off with Jessie Rae, leaving El Jimo to shake his head and growl some more.


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***Vignette***
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We open on a peaceful and beautiful zen garden. There, sitting Indian style is Togo Oni, clad in a dark brown hooded cloak, his blonde hair blowing gently in the spring breeze. He has his eyes closed as we hear his voice narrate the scene.

Togo Oni: “A true warrior must make more than just physical preparations for battle, but also mental and even spiritual preparations before going off into war.”

A rustle in a nearby wooded area. We see another cloaked figure, moving silently, carrying a katana blade.

Togo Oni: “For we never know when we will be tested, until the moment arrives. We are made of the universe, of stars that are born, as well as those who have died and left this place. We are pieced into the image of what a warrior is meant to be.”

The figure moves in, moving in behind Oni.

Togo Oni: “With silence comes great vigilance, in order to obtain true oneness within ourselves and with our ultimate weapon, our mind. For one never knows..”

The blade is about to come down on Oni, but he acts fast and connects with a serious punch, a thrust, right to his opponent’s jugular, who drops the blade and is then taken out with a swift roundhouse kick. Oni turns to the camera with an intense stare.

Togo Oni: “When one must act. I await your challenge, St. Louis Rage.”

Oni thrusts the blade into the ground as another gong goes off, the words forming..

TOGO ONI. COMING NEXT RAGE!



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***COMMERCIAL BREAK***
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Brutalikus
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The Unremarkable
MATCH 4 –
Josh Hominick vs. Oti Amalu
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White smoke and low lighting fill the entryway as “Room A Thousand Years Wide” by Soundgarden picks up... big Oti Amalu making hisway to the ring. Amalu wears a red leather trenchcoat and sunglasses... he smirks at the crowd and acts rather arrogant as his partner Keith Battle follows behind spitting on the ramp and expressing his distaste for the fact that they are followed and flanked by both members of the US Air Force who don't look like they like this situation any better, making sure to tell Battle, “We are only following orders maggot! Be thankful we are here to save your asses!”.

Tom Hartman: Both of these teams and the Gentlemen of Fortune as a whole are looking to get some manner of revenge against Josh Hominick who went into berserker mode after the Gentlemen made their prime strategy to eliminate him from the match. They don't seem to be enjoying each others' company however and you have to wonder what Deacon was thinking by sending the US Air Force out to back up the Brutallion.

Dexter Finch: Too many cooks in the kitchen I think, but then again, how can there ever be too many cooks when they make such delicious food? Unless of course the good cooks hate the bad cooks or are totally jelly of better cookes. Speaking of jelly, what are the odds I could get a sandwhich down here?

“Fire It Up” by Black Label Society kicks in, and "Juggernaut" Josh Hominick walks out from the back- but he isn't alone! He is flanked on either side by the Rage and PWR tag champions, Southern Comfort! Hominick is looking in a foul mood as is just about everybody in and around the ring as there is no love lost between these guys.

Tom Hartman: Smart move by Josh Hominick bringing Southern Comfort down to keep US Air Force and Keith Battle from interfering. Southern Comfort also has plenty of issues with these guys, particularly the Brutallion who have set their sights on the champions and arguably should have won the titles that night instead.

Big Oti is pacing around waiting for Hominick to get into the ring and as soon as Hominick slides into the ring, the two big thugs immediately start lighting into each other with big time haymakers to the delight of the crowd! They start dead even for a bit, but the larger Amula eventually starts winning the exchange until Hominick switches up his tactics and drops him with a double leg takedown. Hominick wraps Amalu into a sideheadlock with punches until Amalu works them to their feet and then shoves Hominick away, looking for a big back body drop on the rebound, but Hominick kicks him in the face instead and then hits a spinning clothesline lariat taking the other big man off his feet! Hominick rebounds and hits a nice leg drop across the throat while on the outside the US Air Force, Keith Battle and Southern Comfort are all getting pretty rowdy and threatening to fight each other. Hominick tries to do the unthinkable by then trying to lift Amalu for a deadlift gutwrench suplex and almost succeeds with his immense power, but it takes too much time and Amalu gets his feet back on the mat and then counters with a big impact scoop slam. The big brut than lifts Hominick up onto his shoulder as soon as Hominick rises and nails the snake eyes turnbuckle drop, and then comes flying at Hominick for a big boot, but Hominick catches the big man in somewhat of an exploder suplex position and the speed of the collision causes both of them to tumble over the top rope to the floor right near the announce tables!

Tom Hartman: Holy chrimeny! These guys are hitting each other like speeding cars and now look at this... it seems the teams have drawn a line in the sand, just daring each other to make a move!

Dexter Finch: Wait, where is the sand? I want to build a sandcastle and make some sand-wiches. My own special recipe. Guess what's in it Tom?

Tom Hartman: Please don't say 'sand' Dex.

Dexter Finch: No! Why would I put sand in a sandwich? That's just gross. My special recipe calls for ketchup. Now you know!

On the outside, Southern Comfort has gathered near Hominick while Battle and USAF have gathered near Amalu until Amalu actually tells them to back off because this is his fight which actually gets a smirk of respect out of Hominick as he motions for Southern Comfort to back off as well. The two big bulls then charge back at each other in a tie up on the outside as Hominick manages to drives Amalu back first into the steel turnbuckle and then starts smashing his face with forearms until Amalu kicks his knee out from under him and then roars, lifting Hominick up and driving him down back first on the floor with a thrusting spinebuster! Hominick's meaty hide hits hard and Amalu swipes his hair back before driving a ravenous set of stomps and elbow drops into Hominick before deadlifting and rolling all 255lbs. Of the Juggernaut into the ring, clearly straining Amalu. Meanwhile on the outside, the US Air Force is clearly conspiring on the outside saying amidst their conversation that their mission was to punish Hominick, not to stand idly by and let this contest go on like it is.

Inside the ring, Amalu is looking confident as he sets up Hominick for a pumphandle slam, but Hominick slides off his shoulder and throws the big Hawaian back with a thunderous german suplex, followed by another and another! Hominick staggers up to his feet with that exchange taking the wind out of him when he is clocked straight in the face with a springboard beautiful disaster kick from Randy Shaw of the USAF!

The referee doesn't see it as Jason White is busy distracting the referee and Shaw slides out of the ring smirking at his handiwork, only to realize that he slid straight out in front of Southern Comfort who grabs Shaw and whips him back first into the barricade and starts to stomp on him! Meanwhile on the other side of the ring, Amalu's partner Keith Battle pulls Jason White off the apron and the two start arguing with each other and as it looks like the two hired teams under the Gentlemen of Fortune are looking like they are about to start slugging it out, out of th crowd dives Kaz Hashimoto as he nails a flying shoulder tackle to White!

Tom Hartman: It's Kaz Hashimoto! The US Air Force continued to stir the brewing feud between these two teams when hurt Kaz' partner Yoshi in the preshow match and it looks like Kaz is back for revenge!

Battle looks like he is about to get involved with the brawl with Kaz and White but decides against it and runs around the ring to get him some of Southern Comfort who is working away at Randy Shaw! In the ring, Battle looks pissed after noticing that USAF interfered in this match, but he measures Hominick up regardless and goes for a spear, but Hominick hits a desperation Toothless yakuza kick square in the face! The audience is solidly behind the Juggernaut as he takes the straps down from his singlet (a la Kurt Angle) and readies to blast Amalu with a big Meat Hook lariat and hits it! Amalu falls against the middle ropes from the force and then Hominick rolls with the adrenaline and grabs Amalu by the leg and chest and uses all the strength he can muster to lift the near 300lbs-er over his head and then he slams him HARD to the mat compling his Juggernaut Press Slam! The move obviously taxed the hell out of Hominick, but it did the job as he hooks the leg and goes for the pin!

… One

… Two

… Three!


Cordelia Stewart: Here is your winner, Josh Hominick!

The crowd cheers while Southern Comfort slides into the ring, leaving Shaw beaten down on the outside and going to congratulate Hominick while Amalu rolls out of the ring and Battle helps him to the back. Kaz Hashimoto also heads to the back after leaving White laid out near the ramp while Hominick calls for a microphone.

Josh Hominick: (panting) Deacon! Your ass is mine after you cost me my shot at the Rage title! You can bring all the kings horses and all the kings men, but once I'm through with you, there is nothing on earth that will be able to put you back together again! When you grow a set of balls, come face me like a man!

Hominick drops the microphone as the crowd cheers and Southern Comfort raises his hands in victory.


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***SCENE FADES TO BACKSTAGE***
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We go backstage to find Brandon Laux and Alex Hawke in Brandon's dark and messy room, conspiracy diagrams lining the walls, books, papers, pictures and all manner of things laying ascew across the room. Brandon paces like a hyena back and forth while Hawke sits their casually and then Brandon slams his hands on the table that Hawke is sitting at and begins to shout sweet clearly dampening his hair as if he has been at this for awhile.

Brandon Laux: TELL ME WHAT YOUR PLANS ARE!! I know you reptiles are planning something! Tell me what you know!

The camera then spins around to find James Galleon sitting at the other end of the table, tied to a wooden chair and with his mouth ductaped as he struggles to break free. Alex Hawke then casually says to Brandon...

Alex Hawke: It doesn't help that his mouth is taped shut. Why don't you sit down and let me do the talking for awhile?

Brandon sighs and takes a seat, being incredibly fidgetty as he shuffles through papers and stuff while Hawke gets up and removes the tape from Galleon's mouth. Hawke continues to casually stroll around the room, picking up random objects like a book and looking at them all the while.

James Galleon: (panting) What.. in the bloody hell....are you talking about? RELEASE ME... AT ONCE!

Alex Hawke: “Diamond” James Galleon, or should I say James DILBERT Galleon...

James Galleon: My middle name is not Dilbert! It is Diamond- DIAMOND!

Alex Hawke: I don't know who you are trying to fool and you aren't exactly in the position of power at the moment, are you? Anyways, you are the son of the wealthy billionare businessman Charles Galleon and the grandson of Alfred Avery Galleon. Your family has made a name for themselves by making investments in various companies across the UK and even into the United States and more. Companies that are linked to other companies that are linked to politicians and perhaps even the president of the United States himself. Whether or not you are reptillians from the fourth dimension as my friend here suggests is irrrelevant as you have ties to men and women around the world that can sway business, political offices, schooling systems and even knowledge itself. Either way you hold a key to the power to control the world.

James Galleon: What do the basement dwelling miscreants want with me? You must be out of your bloody minds! You're assumptions are absolutely ludicrous and how do you know the information you have been reading about me isn't false?

Brandon Laux: Oh no! The reptilian is right! These books could be lieing to us to throw us off the real trail!

Brandon starts to rip up one of the books when Alex calms him down.

Alex Hawke: Easy Brandon. Just relax. What do we want? Heheheh... we're asking the questions here and we won't release you until we are good and satisfied with the answers you give us.

James Galleon: When the rest of the Gentlemen find out about this, there is nothing that will stop us from breaking every limb in your pathetic little hides you contemptible miscreants!

Galleon continues to yell as the camera cuts out to commercial.


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***COMMERCIAL BREAK***
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MATCH 5 – EWS Goddess Title #1 Contender Mini-Tourney: Semi-Finals
Cailin Dillon vs. Rain Singh
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The drum beat of "Born free" by MIA starts off slow as the lights starts flickering in to the tune of the beat. Once the beat gets faster, the lights also starts flickering faster as Rain Singh comes out to the displeasure of the fans.Once we hear the, “WOO,” Rain lifts up the hoodie and allows the fans to see her face, a scowl imprinted on her face as she enters noticably without her manager Marco Cruze. She makes sure to be extra tempermental when she argues with the audience all the way down to the ring as the music to “Tornado” by Little Big Town begins with a video background of rain and a tornado with letters spinning around. The twister spins through and spells out “Cailin Dillon” Cailin enters to a mixed reaction as some fans are still behind her, but others dislike her association with Elite, especially since Marco Cruze IS accompanying her to the ring. Cailin gets to the ring and Rain begins screaming at Marco about why he is favoring Cailin and he tries to claim he doesn't favor either of them more than the other.

Tom Hartman: It seems like things have been volitile all night and it isn't getting any better right now as Rain looks to be upset about how her manager accompanied Cailin to the ring instead of her. To say that there is instability in the ranks of Elite is an understatment.

Dexter Finch: Speaking of unstable, how can Marco's stubby little legs hold up his big fat body? That is the question that keeps me awake at night.

Tom Hartman: Anyways, two of the five Elite women are squaring off right now for a chance to face Meghan Cross in two weeks for an EWS World Woman's title shot against Ambiance who is currently over in PWR promoting an upcoming match with a very bright up and coming talent. Of course that is if Ambiance is the champion by then.

Dexter Finch: Mrs. Finch #1 isn't here? I think I just died a little inside.... oh well, Mrs. Finch #2 is going to beat that scary crazy Rain, so I guess I can't be too sad.

Cailin and Rain are stirring around getting ready to lock up when a new song hits: "The Haunted" by Memphis May Fire. After a few seconds out steps the winner of the previous mini tournament match, Meghan Cross! Cailin doesn't look like she minds her being out there, but Rain however is absolutely livid and threatens to jump out of the ring to attack her as Meghan stops long enough to trade some trash talk with her and then moves over to the commentary booth, Rain still spilling slurs and vulgarity left and right, mostly directed at Meghan but then she turns and starts bitching Cailin out, accusing her of being behind Meghan coming out here.

Tom Hartman: Welcome Meghan, but it looks like you've already drawn some unwelcome attention in the short time you've been out here.

Meghan Cross: Can we say... paranoid bitch?

Cailin steps towards the middle of the ring and starts defending herself in the argument as the bell rings and Marco tries desperately to plead with them ton keep their cool but it falls on deaf ears as Cailin and Rain start trading rapid punches and end up rolling on the mat throwing everything they've got at each other to start things off! By the time both of them roll off each other and to their feet, but Cailin's hair is a desheveled mess complete with a couple noticable scratch marks across her cheek while Rain already has a busted lip. The match continues at a fast and furious pace with Rain running at Cailin, Cailin side steps and Rain springboards at Cailin for a tornado DDT, but Cailin catches her in a northerlights suplex instead! They get up again, but Cailin presses the advantage with some european upper cuts, a snap suplex and a big time knee drop and then pulls Rain back to her feet only to get a messy spear for her trouble that takes the both of them through the ropes to the floor!

Meghan Cross: Forget this being a wrestling match, this looks more like, as the late Gordon Solie would say, a Pier Six Brawl...

Dexter Finch: Amen to that sister. This looks what happens when I eat spaghetti- it ends up all over my face and then all over the floor!

Marco is nearby outside the ring, pleading for them not to kill each other not because he cares about them, but more because he cares about the money they can make him. Meanwhile, the fight continues to ensue as Rain hits a make shift shining wizard out on the floor, talking trash the entire time as she pulls Cailin over and attempts to bash her face into the stairs. Cailin counters and slams Rain's face on the stairs instead and then whips Rain around and throws her back into the steel knees first! Rain hits the floor near the commentary booth that Meghan is sitting at as Cailin climbs up onto the apron and measures up Rain looking for a diving clothesline, but Rain jumps up and catches her in the abdomen with a big time dropkick instead! Both women are already breathing heavily and having trouble getting to their feet as the referees count is growing a bit too high for comfort

… 7

… 8 (Rain rolls gingerly back into the ring)

… 9 (Cailin staggers back to her feet and goes to slide back in much to Rain's shagrin but Rain responds by hitting a baseball slide that drives Cailin back into the commentary table).


Rain slides back out of the ring and then nails Cailin flush across the face with her Rebellion bicycle kick, absolutely flooring her! Instead of pressing the advantage however, Rain decides to walk right up to the commentary table and starts to bitch out Meghan Cross once again as Meghan stands up while still talking over commentary and begins to argue back!

Meghan Cross: To put a spin on my mentor's catch-phrase, COME AT ME, BITCH!

Dexter Finch: (awkwardly) M-m-meghan? My name is Dexter!

Meghan Cross: I know who you are hun!

Dexter Finch: I just wanted to say that I think you are cute and uh, uh, uh....

Meghan Cross: Well thanks sweetie, but I should let you know that I'm taken before this goes further. Sorry.

Rain leans over the table looking like she is about to deck Meghan, but Cailin comes from behind Rain and grabs her for a german suplex, walking back a few steps and launching Rain back first into the ring apron! Rain screams in pain and crumples to the floor and Cailin wastes little time rolling Rain back into the ring and then punts Rain straight in the gut for good measure before ascending to the top turnbuckle. Cailin sets up and flies with a perfect top rope moonsault- only to hit Rain's knees as the audience is cheering the hell out of this highly physical contest! Rain takes awhile to get to her feet, but when she does, she runs the ropes and nails her Rain Over Me (springboard moonsault) and goes for the pin...

… One

… Two

… Th-kickout!


Rain is freaking out now and starts slamming fists into Cailin's face and then goes for the pin again, only to get the same result! Rain's frustration knows no ends as she pulls Cailin to her feet and goes for Rain Over The Slums (ultimo DDT), but Cailin pushes Rain against the ropes and Rain rebounds into a kick to the gut as Cailin sets her up for the Texas Twister (twist of fate) but Rain shoves her away too! Cailin rebounds and Rain goes for the Rebellion bicycle again, but Cailin ducks and counters by grabbing Rain and hitting an inverted headlock backbreaker that drops both to the mat in exhaustion!

Meghan Cross: Nice counter by Cailin, but I gotta wonder if she's gassed herself out from that big-time move?

The audience is mostly cheering for Cailin or this contest in general now as she gets up in the nearest corner on raggedly legs, but she starts to stomp, indicating that she is going for the Eyes of Texas (sweet chin music) and then darts straight at Rain, only for Rain to trip her and lock her in the Struggle of Life (regal stretch)! Cailin is screaming in pain and looking like she is about to tap out, but she holds her fist in the air and then slowly starts to claw her way to the ropes! Rain puts everything into her finisher hold, but somehow Cailin still manages to get her fingers on the ropes before her arm drops limply to the mat- but it is enough and the referee calls it as a rope break! Rain is freaking out and actually grabs the referee by the shirt and almost gets disqualified as a result, but in frustration Rain walks over and shouts, “MARCO!” and Marco looks like he is in a panic, not knowing which of them to support before he slowly nods and starts to shout at the referee about his call to break the submission! Marco successfully ties up the referee long enough for Rain to slide to the outside of the ring and grab a chair! Rain slides into the ring with it behind the ref's back and goes to bash Cailin over the head with it when Meghan Cross jumps onto the apron and yanks the chair out of Rain's hands! Rain immediately starts cursing up a storm at Meghan, and when Rain finally turns around, she eats an Eyes of Texas superkick that lays her out cold! The referee's attention returns and Cailin flops on top of Rain in exhaustion for the pin!

… One

… Two

… Three!


Cordelia Stewart: Here is your winner and advancing in the EWS Woman's Title Mini Tournament, Cailin Dillon!

Meghan Cross: Kids, that's why you don't take your eyes off of who you're wrestling... I'm sure Rain will be chugging down the "Hater-ade" and experiencing massive butt-hurt, but karma's a bitch... like her.

Cailin celebrates in victory as Marco looks like he doesn't know how to feel about the result and Cailin points to Meghan outside the ring and indicates that she is going to be walking away from the mini tournament with that shot at the title. Meghan slowly nods as Rain has a death glare traced straight on Meghan as she struggles to a vertical base behind Cailin and Meghan simply shrugs and makes her way to the back.


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***SCENE FADES TO BACKSTAGE***
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The scene is back-stage as we see Ambrose Ulysses Beauregarde twirling his steel titanium cane decked out in an all-white suit with a black bolo tie as he approaches a stage-hand and starts to speak in his syrupy Southern drawl.

Ambrose Ulysses Beauregarde: 'Scuse me, mah deah suh, but might ah ask wheyah is mah darlin' Miss Jessie Rae?

Stage-Hand: Mr. Beauregarde, I saw her in the locker room labeled "The Diamond".

A.U.B.'s eyes start to narrow and his right eye twitches as he speaks in a stern tone.

Ambrose Ulysses Beauregarde: Thank ya, kind suh...

A.U.B. then finds Ricky's locker room and when he barges in, he sees his Miss Jessie Rae scantily dressed in a white bra and thong, giving Ricky a lap dance to the tune of "Lap Dance" by N.E.R.D on his prize golden throne. as A.U.B. whacks the radio off of the table as Ricky screams and so does Miss Jessie Rae as she jumps to her feet.

Ricky Diamond: (goofy girlish scream) AHHHHHHH! Give me three steps towards the door mister Huckleberry Finn!

Miss Jessie Rae: Oh my God, Ambrose, it was terrible... just terrible! He MADE me do it! He kidnapped me and wanted me to get naked for him!

Ricky Diamond: Unless this is some sort of kinky roleplaying you're into, that's not the way I-

A.U.B. then pulls off his white glove and slaps Ricky across the face with it hard on each side as he screams in anger.

A.U.B.: YOU, SUH, HAVE DIS-HONUHED MAH DEAH MISS JESSIE RAE... AND AH DUH-MAND SAT-IS-FACTION!

Ricky tries to run away as A.U.B. chases him around the room, knocking various "Beard of the Year" trophies, a desk full of fake beards and lots of other miscelanious crap on on the floor, then grabbing a nearby chair and tossing it right at Ricky and screams.

A.U.B.: GIT OUTTA MAH SIGHT, BOY!

Ricky runs out into the hallway, only to get knocked out by a massive boxing right hook from Freeman, who just snarls silently at an unconscious Ricky Diamond as A.U.B takes Miss Jessie Rae by the hand and screams in Ricky's face.

A.U.B.: Now you listen, an' listen real nice an' keer-fully, boy... if you evah lay yo hands on mah sweet Miss Jessie Rae evah a'gin, ah will place yo head on a plaque next to mah otha big-game trophies... an' even turn yo lil' sasquatch into a rug fo' mah rumpus room! So DON'T. TREAD. ON. ME!

A.U.B. walks right over the chest of Ricky Diamond, leaving him knocked senseless... but stops as he hears Ricky Diamond murmur something in a feint voice.

Ricky Diamond: Foghorn Leghorn, your wife has the best ta-tas I've ever seen!

A.U.B stomps back over to Ricky and gives him a big wack with his cane, putting him out cold for real this time as he walks away in anger as we go back to ringside.


_____________________________
***COMMERCIAL BREAK***
_____________________________



MAIN EVENT –
Justin Moreno & ??? vs. Leonard Luv & ???
_____________________________


The lights go out as spotlights circle around the arena as the spoken word opening to "Immortal" by War of Ages starts to play over the P.A. System. The spotlight finally focuses in the heart of the crowd with a spotlight on Justin Moreno, arms extended in the crucifix position. He then walks with determination through the crowdembracing the fans and then he jumps over the guard rail and then wraps his arms around a barricade and allows the crowd to slap him on the back (a la WCW babyface Chris Jericho).

Tom Hartman: So tonight’s main even is somewhat of a mystery as we only know two of the participants: the #1 contender Justin Moreno and the Rage champion Leonard Luv. Who will they each choose as their partners?

The fans wait in speculation while Moreno readies in the ring and then they all pop when “Einstein” by Tech N9ne starts playing. A few pyros blast off at the entrance as Billy Shaw walks out as he starts bouncing along and playing to the crowd reciting his “I believe that we can win!” callout and response with the audience to a thunderous ovation as Shaw then slaps hands with Moreno as the two ready for the match. Then...

HOLD UP, WAIT A MINUTE, PUT A LITTLE LOVE IN IT!

"Luv Addict" by Family Force 5 continues as Leonard Luv emerges from the back. He does his patented Luv Strut as pink pyros crack and scream on either side of him. He struts down the ramp to the ring accompanied by huis bodyguard Brutus and girlfriend Inga Lovegood, paying no mind to the crowd that's booing his every move and brandishing his Rage title right in front of all of them. He enters the ring and spins around, arms outstretched. Luv tosses his shades into the crowd and moonwalks into his corner, a smirk on his face as they all await the arrival of his partner. The arena goes dark as the drum beats of “Counting Bodies like Sheep to the Rhythm of The War Drums” at the 30 Second mark of the song fog fills the entrance. At the 42 Second mark of the song red lights flash in the arena with the “OW!” that are shouted, every time they are shouted in the song those red nights flash. At the 1:10 mark the words start.

Tom Hartman: Oh no....

Dexter Finch: It's the boogeyman! Please don't let him eat me Tom!

A red spotlight shines on the entrance come on as Deathstalker steps out with his executioners mask over his head not far behind him walks Vincent Delerious as Moreno looks like he has just seen a ghost- or two of them! Luv smirks as Delerious' appearance seems to have touched a nerve as Justin leans over the ropes and shouts that Delerious has no business being down here after he agreed to leave Justin alone when Justin beat Deathstalker a few weeks back. Delerious retrieves a microphone while Deathstalker enters the ring, the mask on his face being the only thing that is keeping him under control as Delerious snickers and addresses Moreno.

Vincent Delerious: Relax eXtremist or Justin or whatever the hell you want to be called these days. I'm a man of my word after all. Yes it is true that I promised I would no longer target you after our business awhile ago, but I am associated with the brilliant and wise Rage champion Leonard Luv now who sought to make a very smart business deal with me. And now, just because I can't actively seek you out to destroy you doesn't mean that I can't destroy you if you just so happen to be in the same place at the same time and that time IS RIGHT NOW! Hahahaha!

Delerious hops up onto the apron and looks like he is going to remove Deathstalker’s executioners mask when Luv goes, “Woah woah woah! Hold up, wait a minute! This beast isn’t going to attack me when you take off his mask, is he daddy-o?” to Vincent’s reply, “You had best steer clear Luv.” And Luv basically persuades Delerious to just command him for now instead of taking the mask off and unleashing Deathstalker’s unhinged side, though Delerious says, “You owe me!” thanks to how badly he still wants to destroy Moreno. While Shaw offers to start with the history between Moreno and Deathstalker, but Justin says that he doesn’t want to put Shaw in the line of fire from that monster and courageously steps forth to face him.

Tom Hartman: What’s this? It would almost seem like the Rage champion is scared of Deathstalker with the way he is trying to talk Delerious out of removing Deathstalker’s mask, the only thing that keeps him somewhat under control.

Dexter Finch: Luv is just being concerned for the well being of everybody around here, especially me. He knows that Deathstalker would kill me if he got loose!

Tom Hartman: Why would he kill you of all people Dex?

Dexter Finch: Because I called him some very mean names that I can’t say on the air,,,,

Eventually Deathstalker steps ominously into the center of the ring to meet Moreno, eerily calm the whole time and looking very foreboding with the executioners mask on. Delerious barks orders from the inside as Moreno looks reluctant to lock up with the monster, but summons the courage none-the-less to try to grapple Deathstalker, but DS shoves him down effortlessly and then goes for various different big punches/kicks/stomps, but Moreno uses his superior agility to roll around, ducking and weaving the attacks until he starts building momentum by running the ropes and nails DS with a flying forearm- but he doesn’t go down! Moreno tries again, but all it does is stumble him back! Moreno runs at Deathstalker again, ducking a big clothesline, running the ropes to build momentum and comes back with one more top speed flying forearm smash that sends Deathstalker tumbling over the top rope with a little help from Billy Shaw who casually pulls the ropes down behind DS! The audience is roaring for Moreno as he motions to Luv to watch closely and hits a running cartwheel into a handspring moonsault that launches him all the way over the top rope into DS! Moreno beats his chest to fire up the crowd even more but then turns to see Brutus coming right towards him in a threatening manner! Moreno tells him to back off as Luv comes sneaking around the outside and shoves Moreno right into the arms of Brutus and when it looks like Brutus is about to slam Moreno on the ground, here comes Billy Shaw diving off the top turnbuckle and taking out Brutus (and Moreno by accident) with a big time whisper in the wind-style senton to them on the outside!

Luv hits a running boot to the face of Moreno and starts working him over with all sorts of stomps and furious strikes until the referee admonishes him for it and Inga Lovegood steps up onto the apron to start arguing with the referee, which is supposed to give Luv time to use some cheap tactics, but it backfires as Moreno hits a capoeira kick to the face and hits a highlight reel-worthy jumping tornado reverse STO that plants Luv face first on the barricade! Brutus gets back to his feet and looks like he is about to slug Shaw after the spill out but then the audience cheers as the referee ejects both Inga and Brutus from the ringside area, making the two of them clearly enraged! However, it does turn out in Luv’s favor anyways as the referee being preoccupied with getting them out of their gives Delerious to run across the outside to blast Moreno with a stiff clothesline to a resounding set of boos as he nonchalantly struts around like he didn’t do anything,

Tom Hartman: The referee says sayonara to Luv’s bodyguard and girlfriend, but unfortunately that dastardly Delerious is still waltzing around like he didn’t do a damn thing after hitting Moreno?

Dexter Finch: I didn’t see anything happen. Literally. My eyes were closed....-sniff- Oh Flying Spaghetti Monster, my lord and savior, PLEASSSE don't let Deathstalker kill me!

Deathstalker has now returned to his feet and is tangling with Billy Shaw who is throwing stinging kicks to DS’ kneed, but DS’ catches him by the throat and throws Shaw across the outside with a big time two-handed choke toss! He then returns his attention to Moreno, nailing him with a big boot on the outside and then whipping him viciously shoulder first into the steps before tossing pressing Moreno into the air and tossing him through the ropes back into the ring. Deathstalker continues to stalk the #1 contender, grabbing him for a tripezzius claw followed by several slugging forearms to the head and then throws Moreno across the ring like a ragdoll with a throwing vertical suplex! Shaw tries to tag in, but every time Moreno gets close, DS pulls him away executing a pumhandle slam, a chokebreaker and a t-bone suplex. Moreno is looking in bad shape as he goes for the tag once again, but this time Deathstalker pulls him into position for Death Becomes Thee (wheelbarrow dragon suplex)- but Moreno lands on his feet to a huge pop from the crowd! He lands near Luv's corner and Luv attempts to get a cheap shot in, but Moreno blocks his punch and then ducks as he senses Deathstalker barreling in behind him, causing DS to crash into Luv hard, knocking him off the apron- and worse yet for the Rage champion, Luv's hand slaps DS' shoulder on the way down, which causes the referee to call it a legitimate tag!

When DS turns around, Moreno hits a dropsault to the big monster followed by a tidal crush handspring kick to DS in the corner and then a ten punches count as the crowd gets fully behind Moreno! DS catches Moreno and goes to drive him to the mat with a sitout powerbomb, but Moreno leaps off his shoulders, running the ropes and hitting a sprinboard hurricanrana to the big man that finally gives him a moment to dive in for the tag on Shaw!

Tom Hartman: Billy Shaw is in but Deathstalker isn't the legal man!

Shaw immediately climbs to the top turnbuckle and dives off at DS with a 450 into a torando DDT that sends DS rolling all the way across the ring! Shaw still doesn't realize Luv is the legal man as Shaw goes for the Stuntin' 101 (sprinboard corkscrew moonsault) but is knocked off the ropes when Luv runs across the apron and blasts him with a big time knee to the face! Shaw goes down as the referee then walks over to Luv and tells him that he is the legal man, but Luv looks at him in shock, arguing that he never tagged in, but it doesn't matter! Luv kicks around about the decision, but finally steps into the ring as DS rolls to the outside at the command of Delerious. Luv takes advantage of Shaw's predicament with a sharp kick to the stomach and then one to the head as well, taunting Moreno all the while about how he will never be the champion and how he should just pack up and go home to his druggy-whore wife which almost gets under Moreno's skin enough for him to step in while Luv continues to work away at Shaw with a double underhook suplex, a couple of knee drops and then Luv uncharacteristically climbs up to the top turnbuckle for a diving elbow drop, but he spends too much time taunting Moreno and gives Shaw a chance to run up the ropes and to throw him across the ring with a huge top rope frankensteiner! Luv sells the hell out of the impact as Shaw gets to his feet and starts his, “I Believe That We Can Win!” call and response to the crowd and then hits a front dropkick to the face of Luv, a sprinboard leg drop and he rolls with the momentum hitting a standing shooting star press before signaling that he is going to the top ropes! That is until Delerious has had enough on the outside and removes the executioner mask from Deathstalker, causing DS to go berserk!

Tom Hartman: The mask is off! Delerious has unleashed the monster! What is to stop Deathstalker from attacking anyone in this arena when he is this dangerous!? Dex.... Dex? (Dexter Finch has clearly gotten the hell out of dodge in fear of Deathstalker as is nowhere near the commentary booth)

Deathstaalker slides into the ring and levels Shaw with a big time lariat and then he notices Luv and grabs him by the throat as Luv is trying desperately to convince him that they are on the same side! Delerious barks at DS to leave Luv alone, giving Luv enough time to weasel his way to the outside of the ring. DS then notices Moreno telling to come get a piece of him and runs to big boot Moreno off the apron, but Moreno pulls the ropes down, causing DS to fly back out to the floor at high speed! Shaw then stumbles over and tags in Moreno while going to the top rope and he dives off the turnbuckle into a corkscrew plancha onto Deathstalker! Meanwhile, Moreno and Luv get back into the ring and Luv starts fake begging for mercy and then gets a thumb into the eyes of Moreno, giving him a chance to go for the Luv Handle (spinning killswitch), but Moreno shoves him into the turnbuckle and then hits a lighting fast tidal crush handspring kick to the face! Meanwhile, on the outside of the ring, Shaw has gotten Deathstalker's attention and is leading him up the ramp and away from the ring. DS finally manages to almost spear Shaw on the ramp, but Shaw leapfrogs over him and continues to kite him around to keep him away from the ring when suddenly the Kumquat Kid bursts out through the curtain and begins to wail on DS with a chair!

Tom Hartman: It's Ryan Lewis and he's got a chair! You can just see the emotional power of his attacks after Deathstalker injured his friend Sentinel in the cage match two weeks ago!

Meanwhile in the ring, the referee doesn't see what is happening on the ramp as Moreno sets up in the opposite corner while the audience chants “O'le O'le” and Moreno runs across the ring hitting the running facewash in the corner to the champ! Luv stumbles forward a few steps and falls flat on his face (a-la Ric Flair) and then Moreno hops up to the top turnbuckle and soars with the Fall From Grace (corscrew 40 splash)! Moreno goes for the pin!

… One

… Two

… Three!


Cordelia Stewart: Here are your winners, the team of Billy Shaw and Justin Moreno!

Tom Hartman: Justin has pinned the champion! I repeat he has pinned the champion! If that happens in their title match a couple weeks from now, we could be looking at the future champion of Rage!

Moreno starts to celebrate his victory as Shaw comes back down to the ring and we can see a unusually serious Ryan Lewis standing over Deathstalker with the chair that he used to beat the monster down while Delerious shouts at him from a safe distance and Lewis points to him, telling him that he isn't going to get away with what he did to Sentinel. In the ring, Shaw has retrieved the Luv's Rage title and hands it to Justin Moreno who holds it proudly above his head to Luv who is looking on with a look of disdain upon his face outside the ring, indicating that he is coming for the title and that he could very well be the next Rage champion! Moreno lays the title down in the center of the ring and continues to celebrate as Rage fades to black.


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