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Friday Night Rage #4; 08.16.13.
Topic Started: Aug 16 2013, 10:15 AM (125 Views)
Ricky
Member Avatar

Posted ImageLive from the Excelsior Hotel and Casino. Las Vegas, Nevada.
Friday, August 16th 2013

----------------------------------
The show opened with fireworks, smoke and a light display set to the tune of ‘Crazy Train” by Ozzy Osbourne. The crowd cheered as cameras panned the arena, picking up several of the more memorable signs on display:

"Bird Killing is High Class!"

"Where's Leland?"

"The CWCW: Citrus World Championship Wrestling" (accompanied by a picture of a world title with a kumquat on it)



The show begins with Mr. Rick Leban, EWS/NWA Senior Manager of Alliance Relations and Senior VP of Talent Relations for EWS, in the ring, holding a Microphone.

Rick Leban: Ladies and Gentlemen, as promised I have the unfortunately duty of addressing the Commissioner Position on RAGE. Ms. McGowan is currently on leave from EWS, for an undisclosed period of time. As such, we need someone at the helm. But I do not want to rush things at all. I will seek out a suitable replacement, and if Ms. McGowan cannot return to her duties on the first RAGE following our Snake Eyes iPPV, I will announce the next Commissioner on the show following. But for tonight, I will turn to expertise much like we did last week. Ladies and Gentlemen, the Commissioner of FURY… Steve Corman.

"Sabotage" by the Beastie Boys plays as Corman emerges onto the stage. He stands there a moment to soak in the fans applause and some jeers. Corman heads to the ring as some fans cheer and some fans along the aisle do the "Icon" worship wave as Corman nods, points, and smiles. He reaches the stairs, climbs up and steps over the ropes entering the ring.

Steve Corman: Leban, that’s the smartest move you’ve made since you’ve been here! Let’s get down to business shall we? Tonight we’re going to establish a few things. First, we’re going to establish three men that will compete at Snake Eyes for the New Junior Heavyweight Title through a series of Semi Final Matches tonight. And second, we’re going to establish a true number one contender to that 3’7” midget of a joke champion The Kandy Krush Kid. And in that match will be DANNY DE VRIES… (POP) … REX RIOT… (BOOS mixed with some POP) … SENTINEL (BIG POP) … and finally… (Corman Smiles) LEONARD LUV! (OVER-WHELMING BOOS) Oh and one more thing… Ryan Lewis (Corman says with a serious face and then cracks a Smile)… You got the night off bub. Why don’t you do something with your kid tonight, you know, something on a level you can both enjoy. Chuck E Cheese maybe?

Corman laughs as he tosses the mic to Cordelia as the cameras pan to Tom and Dexter.

Tom Hartman: Hello everyone and welcome to another action packed night of Friday Nite RAGE! I am Tom Hartman and alongside me as always, the ever, umm, Lively, Dexter Finch!

Dexter Finch: Lively, like a LIVE WIRE Babeay! It’s gonna be E-Lectric Tommy!


MATCH 1 – JR. HEAVYWEIGHT SEMIFINAL
Malcolm M. Mitchell v. Vincent Thorn
_____________________________


Mitchell and Thorn started with a heated staredown. Tommy commented on how competitive these two guys really are. A Handshake followed, but neither one would release the hand shake, which Dexter commented on the obvious. Finally Mitchell kicked Thorn in the gut, a top wrist lock arm drag, spinning back elbow and a dropkick on the button. Slowly it down with a side headlock, Mitchell kept him grounded for several moments. Tommy mentioned that both of these guys would make excellent first Jr. champions to which Dexter basically repeated Tommy, looking for validation. Back to their feet, Thorn shoved Mitchell into the ropes and floored him with a shoulder block, then mounted him with a flurry of punches! The referee broke Thorn off, and Thorn ducked a clothesline from Mitchell and nailed a leg sweep to the back of 3M’s leg and a leg drop for a two count. Tommy mentioned that it was close, and Dexter followed that with “But no Cigar!” A whip into the ropes was reversed and Thorn rebounded and Mitchell locked in a sleeper! Thorn flailed around fighting it for several moments, before breaking it with a Jawbreaker, then went for a VTS… which Mitchell expertly countered into a ZigZag for a LONG two count. Mitchell set up for the Faceplant, but this time Thorn dodged and DID connect with a VTS, when the GONG of “For Whom the Bell Tolls” hit the speakers and the lights flickered to the music. Dexter inquired what this could mean, even as the mini-tron kept flashing the name PREACHER. Thorn looked all around waiting for the attack that never came. When Thorn finally refocused, Mitchell kipped up and caught Thorn with a superkick that stunned him long enough for Mitchell to nail a Sleep Tight Busaiku Knee Kick

…One!

…Two!!

…Three!!!

Cordelia Stewart: Ladies and Gentlemen, your winner of the match… and advancing in the Jr. Heavyweight Tourney… MALCOLM M MITCHELL!!!

Leaving the ring right away, Preacher entered through the crowd, carrying an object in his hand. As Thorn was trying to get up, Preacher clobbered Thorn with the hand held object and Thorn dropped to his knees. Preacher took a mic and challenged Thorn to a match at Snake Eyes, but not just any match… he then held the metal object to Thorn’s head, which was finally revealed to be a cheese grater, then said the words “FIRST BLOOD” and briskly swiped the metal object across the mans face! Thorn dropped to the mat, holding his face, blood tricking through his fingers as Preacher laughed manically.


_____________________________
***SCENE FADES TO BACKSTAGE***
_____________________________


The scene opens with a very 1980s Federation style backdrop of The Luv Connection logo in hot pink. Much differently from times past, Mistah Falcon is actually front and center, smoothing out his hair, with GQ Money seemingly staring forward from underneath his shades, showing off his iced grill. Behind them, seemingly in deep thought, in an over-exaggerated thinking pose, is Leonard Luv in a suit and tie.

Mistah Falcon: “Ladies and gentlemen, fine honeys everywhere, welcome to passion, welcome to excellence, welcome to The Luv Connection babeay! You know how we do it, and we do it well! You know, there’s something bothering Mistah Falcon tonight guys, and it’s really simple, we’re hungry, hungrier than that fat ass Goddess champ at a Vegas buffet, sweet thang, and yet, we don’t have a match tonight. Tell me, playas, where’s the fun in that?”

GQ walks over, clapping a hand on the shoulder of Falcon.

GQ Money: “That’s right homie G! We gots tha style, we gots tha talent, and yet, we’s being wasted yo. Waz tha deal, homies? You really wanna go and pollute yo airwaves with these wankstas when you’s got the free (three fingers) most talented individuals on yo roster sittin on tha sidelines? Sheeet son, yous guys are wack. And I’s mean like Nicolas Cage wack, yo!”

Luv walks slowly towards the front, standing right between Falcon and GQ Money.

Leonard Luv: “Let’s set the stage for you. Rage, once ran by some two bit whore in a skirt, now seems to be without leadership, it seems to be without an appropriate authority figure. Steve Corman wants to bring his tacky suits and no class to the table and run this joint, but I say no way Daddy-O because The Luv Connection have this party locked down tight! You want one person running this show? How about 3? Think about it, The Luv Connection, commissioners of Rage! Has a nice ring to it, doesn’t it?”

Mistah Falcon: “A firmer truth has never been spoken!”

GQ Money: “Top of the world, dawg!”

Leonard Luv: “Oh and Darkness, sweetheart, babycakes, if you want a closer look at The Luv Doctor, all you have to do is ask for the hotel key, darling, because I’d rock that ass aaaaaaaaaaall night long and party evvvvvvvve’ry day, yeeeeeeoooow! It’s too bad The Luv Connection has to come to the next big NWA show and rip your pretty little faces off, because truth be told, we could make some SERIOUSLY beautiful music together! Oh yeah!”

Mistah Falcon: “The Luv Connection is at your door, honeys, now tell us, what are you gonna do about it? Go cry to your mothers? Text a friend and tell them how scared you are? Because you 3 hoes messed with the wrong bros, and that’s the GOD’S honest truth, if you know what I’m sayin’!”

GQ Money: “Beotches!! Dem titles… theys be comin’ home wit us! Y’all know what I’m sayin? We’s not tha ones to be trifled with, ya hear? ‘Cause we’re the O.G.’s, dats original gangstas! Never to be duplicated son, talent straight up undeniable, ya heard me?! BEOTCHES BEWARE, cause we’re puttin dem tittahs in the ground! BRAAAAT BRAAAAT!”

Luv takes off his shades, a stern look at the camera.

Leonard Luv: “Don’t hate us because we tell the truth ladies. Although without hate, there is no love. The Luv Connection that is!”

Luv puts his shades back on as we’re left with the lasting image of GQ and Falcon standing back to back, with Luv behind them, once again striking that thinking pose, a huge smile on his face.

_____________________________
***COMMERCIAL BREAK***
_____________________________




MATCH 2 – JR. HEAVYWEIGHT SEMIFINAL
Three vs. Justin Cabrera
_____________________________


Cabrera made his entrance to a TON of heat from the EWS crowd. Cabrera to his credit, managed to keep his cool, but it was obvious that it was bothering him, telling his crew to make these people stop booing him. As such, THREE received a massive pop from the crowd, which grew ten fold as he came right in the ring and caught Cabrera off guard with a double leg tackle, bringing the fight right to the young MMA artists front door with big soupbones. But as this domain was definitely Cabrera’s most comfortable, he quickly countered and assumed the dominant position, taking a full mount and tee-ing off as THREE covered up. The referee exhausted his break count and tried to physically intervene which caused Cabrera in the heat of the moment to shake off the referee, almost shove him, receiving a stern warning of disqualification. The distraction allowed THREE to return and catch the man with a Belly to Belly Suplex, to which Cabrera no selled, popping right back up and into a Uranage from THREE! Cabrera again no sells, although rises somewhat slower this time, and THREE drives him to the mat with a jumping neckbreaker, and a neck and leg cradle pin for one a one count, when Cabrera breaks the cradle pin and tries his damndest to lock in an arm bar as THREE is forced to struggle to the ropes. The referee again warns disqualification as Cabrera rides the break count. Popping back up Cabrera hits a spear/spinebuster like throw down, and a flurry of punches followed. The crowd started getting on Cabrera’s case with some “YOU CAN’T WRESTLE” chants that Tommy commented on, and Dexter wondered to whom they were referring. Cabrera decided to show his technical wrestling prowess and followed his attack with some very pro-wrestling moves hitting; a belly to belly suplex, Samoan Drop and a backbreaker in short order. Finally he attempted to lock in his Kimura submission, when suddenly THREE forward rolled and caught a surprised Cabrera in a DEEP One-Winged Butterfly (Omoplata Crossface). Wide eyed and in shock of his predicament, Cabrera found himself dead center of the ring, unable to move, when Suddenly GQ Money ran down to the ring and hoped up onto the apron, where he was immediately met by a headbutt from the masked THREE and a pop from the crowd. Unfortunately, THREE turned into a devastating jumping kick to the head that knocked him out as Cabrera covered…

…One!

…Two!!

…Three!!!

Cordelia Stewart: Ladies and Gentlemen, your winner of the match… and advancing in the Jr. Heavyweight Tourney… JUSTIN CABRERA!!!


_____________________________
***SCENE FADES TO BACKSTAGE***
_____________________________


The scene comes back with Velvet Valentine and Zoey Valerie standing by with Freddy Morris. He adjusts his spectacles and begins.

Freddy Morris: Hello EWS fans, Freddy Morris here bringing you all the news and happenings right here on RAGE! I am standing by with two lovely ladies, Zoey Valerie and Velvet Valentine! Ladies tonight you have a big six man match with The NWA Ladies Champion Cailin Dillon taking on the NWA World 6 Man Tag Champions, the Daughters of Darkness. One would have to imagine that if you three can manage to defeat these ladies that you would move straight to the top of the line in terms of titles shots…

Freddy sticks the mic into Zoey’s face.

Zoey Valerie: That would definitely be high on my scale of accomplishments Freddy but as you can see looking around here, we’re down a man, or girl as it were…

Freddy moves the mic to Valentine.

Velvet Valentine: Oh where oh where is our champion? Seems she moves to the beat of her own drum lately.

Freddy Morris: Off topic for a minute, how is Leland doing Velevet?

Velvet’s look of confidence fades for a moment to sadness and concern, but she forces a faked smile.

Velvet Valentine: He’s a fighter. He’s stronger than anyone I know. He’s out of hospital now and is recovering at home. I love you baby!

The sound of clapping can be heard as Cailin Dillon walks into the shot.

Cailin Dillon: Isn’t that just touching?! Sweetheart, word of advice to you… to both of you actually... Worry about yourselves and your careers and not what your little boy-toys are doing. Cause while you two are playing house at home, neither of you is doing anything of substance here. Look at me. I came here and started worrying ONLY about me, and I am the N-W-A WORLD WOMAN’S CHAMPION. I walk alone and this belt means that in my craft, there is no one greater. You could both learn something from me. So, pay attention out here tonight, cause you will most definitely learn something!

With that, Cailin whips around and she’s gone. Velvet and Zoey look at each other shaking their heads as they follow.

Freddy Morris: Well there you have it! Stick around folks cause coming up next is the ladies 6 WO-man tag! Freddy out!

_____________________________
***COMMERCIAL BREAK***
_____________________________




MATCH 3 – SIX MAN TAG
Cailin Dillon/Velvet Valentine/Zoey Valerie
v.
Daughters of Darkness
_____________________________


The team of Dillon, Velvet and Zoey seemed doomed in this match from the word go, as Velvet and Dillon seemed to argue over who was going to start this match, with Zoey trying to play peace keeper. And almost as a coordinated attack from Mary’s direction, the DoD swooped in an brought the fight to the bickering Divas, with all Six Ladies scraping it out! Clearing Zoey and Velvet from the ring with a set of violent dumps, the three Daughters of Darkness went to Work on Cailin; hitting a Double inverted DDT (Blaze / Gemini) followed by Mary’s throat thrust and trapping headbutts, then immediately followed by a Superkick/spinning leg sweep combination by Gem and Blaze! Gemini covered but it was broken up by Velvet, who then single handedly tried to take on the DoD hitting Mary with a kick to the thigh, and short DDT! A ducked clothesline from Blaze into an atomic drop/neckbreaker combo! But Gemini answered back catching Velvet with a Tornado DDT, then went up to the high rent district! But Zoey would trip up Gemini and climb up there with her, looking for a superplex! But Mary blocked that, stepping between Zoey’s legs and with a heave, a tower of doom was completed with Zoey suplexing Gem, and Mary nailing a powerbomb to Zoey… but the action didn’t end there as Velvet cactus clotheslined Mary and the two fell to the floor, as Cailin came off the top ropes with a timely phoenix splash to the already downed Gemini! The crowd chanted HOLY SHIT as Cailin pulled back on Gemini’s leg bending her in half for the loooooong two count, only broken up by Blaze! Blaze and Dillon traded forearm shivers, with the scrappy Blaze getting the better of the blonde bomb shell, until Cailin took advantage of the referee being out of position and LOW KICKED Blaze in her Lady Parts and hitting the Texas Twister (Twist of Fate!) At that moment, Velvet, sliding back into the ring, whipped Cailin around asking her “WHAT ARE YOU DOING?”, question the champions underhanded actions. Cailin flashed the ‘talk to the hand’ gesture in Velvets face, to which Velvet shoved Cailin back… and Cailin responded with an Eyes of Texas (sweet chin music)!! Cailin again flashed the ‘Talk to the hand’ gesture, and rolled from the ring, yanking away her title, and primping her hair in the reflection. Bloody Mary crawled back into the ring and caught Velvet before she could rise with the Bloody Mary Ankle lock! Mary screamed for Velvet to scream her name, and Velvet held on for a moment until Mary dropped into a grapevine version and Velvet quickly tapped out. Mary kept the hold on, screaming for Velvet to scream her name, but broke the hold at the beckoning of the referee and her partners as Zoey Valerie checked on Velvet.

Cordelia Stewart: Ladies and Gentlemen, your winners of the match… The NWA Six Man tag Team Champions… THE DAUGHTERS OF DARKNESS!!!


_____________________________
***SCENE FADES TO BACKSTAGE***
_____________________________


The camera cuts to a close up on the face of none-other than the future challenger for the NWA Sin City title, Eddie Morgan's face, shrouded partially in some sort of shadows as if the light from the moon is peering through a window onto his cheek. The camera zooms out very slowly as he starts to speak, a consistent “beeping” noise ringing out in the background every few seconds.

Eddie Morgan: I'm usually a man of few words, but in this case I'll make an exception. For those who don't know yet, Eddie Morgan is the name and reviving pro wrestling is my game. Even before we met in the High Stakes match awhile back, I've followed Magnum Wolf's career for many years before that. Many consider him a legend of this sport and the man who deserves that shiny piece of NWA gold around his waist more than anyone else in the world. But me (shaking his head in disapproval)? . . . No, not anymore. When you were in your prime Wolfy, no one could touch you. You would have deserved to hold a belt like the Sin City title one-hundred times over. But you know what Wolfy? You've gone soft!

The camera has now backed up far enough by this point to reveal that Eddie Morgan is sitting on a small chair next to a hospital bed outfitted with various medical equipment including the heart monitoring apparatus that was revealed to be the source of the consistent beeping throughout the promo. On the bed lays a human-shaped figure covered in blankets with a tag at the foot of the bed reading, “Magnum Wolf”.

Eddie Morgan: You used to be one of the most ruthless and feared men in the history of pro wrestling and you could be again, but do you know what's stopping you? Your bloody little conscience. I'm here to revive pro wrestling because it is dieing thanks to weak men such as yourself who value your consciences more than your careers. This sport deserves better than that. If it is to survive, I will cast out archaic ideas like, “respect” and “honor” and replace them with the raw, unhinged violence and aggression that pro wrestling should have had from the very beginning! No holding back! No mercy! No morality! You want to be the Sin City champion Magnum Wolf?! Well prove that you are still as cold-hearted and ruthless as you used to be! Prove that you will stop at nothing to earn and defend that title, because I sure as hell won't mate! You can bet on that. I'm going to make an example of you Wolfy and when I'm through with you . . .

Morgan stands up and yanks the chord out of the heart monitor machine, causing it to flatline with a long loud “BEEEEEEEEEEPPPPPPP”!

Eddie Morgan: You're going to flatline!

Eddie Morgan walks off camera as the machine continues to flatline until the camera cuts back to the arena.

_____________________________
***COMMERCIAL BREAK***
_____________________________



MATCH 4 – JR. HEAVYWEIGHT SEMIFINAL
GQ Money vs. Charles Williams
_____________________________


The match began with GQ verbally chewing out, in only the way that GQ can, Williams for his actions last week and abandoning the team. GQ pointed to the mini tron and it lit up with this:
Quote:
 
Williams then grabs Three in a full nelson, yelling for GQ to take him out. GQ charges at Three with a Spinning Heel Kick, but Three rolls out of the way and GQ decks Williams instead. Holding his jaw and looking irate as GQ inaudibly mouths the word “Fuck!”, he goes to find Three, only to get a modified Enzuigiri kick to the back of the skull from Williams who give his team the middle finger and walks out still holding his jaw and a ROAR from the crowd!

The video ends and Williams can be clearly seen laughing about the video. GQ having had enough of Williams making fun, went for a clothesline that Williams avoided and began peppering GQ with snapping jabs! Williams connected with Arm wrench hammerlock followed by repeated kicks to the exposed shoulder, really working over Money. He followed it with the England Driver (Pumphandle half nelson driver) and locked on the British Figure Four Leglock (Reverse figure four leglock) for several long painful moments before GQ managed to crawl to the ropes. GQ would take control off reversing a whip attempt and catching Williams with a Sling Blade clothesline, and then quickly nailed a seated superkick to flatten out Williams. GQ Runs and bounces on the bottom, then middle, then moonsaults off the top, hitting his 3x's the SWAGG, Triple Jump Moonsault catching a Loooong two count before Williams managed a kick out. Even Tom commented that he thought GQ had just won the match, to which Dexter confirmed it was only two and you need three! GQ went for his ‘SUUU'Plexin Yo Ass!’ suplex quartette, hitting the German suplex, rolled into a Tiger Suplex, rolled into a Dragon Suplex, but as he tried to finished with an Exploder Suplex, Williams slipped the leg and rolled GQ into an inside cradle that almost won Williams the match. But due to the beating, he could not make his feet first and GQ resumed his lead catching him with a Running Swing-Out Neckbreaker! GQ began telling the audience that he’s about to ‘ICE DIS FOO’, when Williams suddenly nailed an Ode to Wyndham (Superkick) out of nowhere! Charles Williams, with the crowd behind him began heading towards the top ropes, looking to end it, when Mistah Falcon came hauling ass down to ringside… but Williams leapt at Falcon with a standing version of the High Class (Shooting Star Press)! As the referee turned his attention to the chaos at ringside, GQ reached into his tights and pulled out some blinged out knucks, and slid them onto his hands, but THREE came through the crowd, nailing his 3DT behind the referees back! Charles returned to the top ropes and nailed a The London Fall (630° senton, sometimes while performing a corkscrew)!

…One!

…Two!!

…Three!!!

Cordelia Stewart: Ladies and Gentlemen, your winner of the match… and advancing in the Jr. Heavyweight Tourney… CHARLES WILLIAMS!!!


_____________________________
***SCENE FADES TO BACKSTAGE***
_____________________________


We open outside the arena. There, with her back against a wall, is Ambiance, clad in a black hooded sweatshirt and matching leather pants, those all too familiar heeled boots, this time a deep red, and a lit cigarette in her hands, looking forward, seemingly paying no mind to us.

Ambiance: “For years I have made a living, simply being who I am, whether people liked it or not. I was unapologetic to anyone who crossed paths with me, and I earned everything I worked for, anything I wanted. I am an authority on women’s wrestling. I am a fixture. I am a fucking icon. And yet here I stand, at a crossroads in my career. What the fuck is this shit?”

A drag of the cigarette, sensually blowing smoke into the night sky.

“If I cave into the demands of the NWA, become what they deem appropriate, title shots, opportunities, fame and fortune, it all comes to me, and I know I deserve it. But if I choose to do that, I lose everything I am. All of you in the NWA, EWS, you don’t get it, do you, fuckers? I can’t lose who I am, not a single piece. I can’t walk through my life, through my career, feeling incomplete. Maybe you all live miserable lives where you can’t be who you really are, and that’s fine for you, a bunch of corporate suit shitheads, but not this woman, no, not at all.”

She flicks her cigarette into the night, drawing back her hood, revealing her wavy brown hair. She casts an icy cold stare at us.

“Now word on the street is, because I bashed in a secretary and caused property damage that I’m banned from the next NWA show. Are you for real, Ricky? Don’t you realize that your own fucking inabilities as a VP of Talent Relations is what caused all of this? I’m a disgruntled employee you son of a bitch, and if you don’t give me what I want, I’m not going to strike, oh no, I’m going to do something far worse. How? Why a lady of my attributes doesn’t reveal her secrets, but you’ll know soon enough.”

A smirk forms on her face.

“Oh it will be glorious. It will be fucking delicious!”

Looking pleased with herself, she puts her hood back down, gazing out into the night.

_____________________________
***COMMERCIAL BREAK***
_____________________________




MATCH 5 – ONE ON ONE
Darkness v. Vasuki
_____________________________


The match began with Vasuki standing in her Crucifix pose, but still wearing her long robe. She removed the head dress and opened the robe revealing a long sword! Vasuki locked eyes with Darkness and DRAWS THE SWORD! Darkness takes a cautionary step back as Vasuki points the sword towards Darkness and takes up a fighting stance to which the referee, bravely, considering how crazy this broad clearly is, steps in front of Vasuki, waving his arms, telling her to put it away. After several long moments of convincing, and a lot of ‘will she? Won’t she?’, Vasuki finally sheaths her sword and turns to the ring girl, threatening to harm her if she does anything to bring dishonor to her weapon. Meanwhile, Darkness has taken up a fighting stance behind Vasuki as the referee calls for the bell. Vasuki turns and does so SMACK into Darkness’ Kill The Light (A brutal kick to the head) finisher! The crowd OHHHS loudly and pops as Darkness smirks and drops into the lateral cover…

…One!

…Two!!

…Three!!!

Cordelia Stewart: Ladies and Gentlemen, your winner of the match…

…When suddenly "You Call Me A Bitch Like It's A Bad Thing" by Halestorm kicks in an a surprising pop from a large portion of the crowd as Ambiance walks with a purpose directly to the ring as Darkness waits, clearly seeming to know what’s coming next. Ambiance gets right into the ring and wastes no time as the two women walk right up to each other and throw caution into the wind and just start trading huge bombs with each other!!! The crowd explodes as Ambiance and Darkness literally tee off on each other! The top ladies in EWS stand toe to toe, going shot for shot, not even trying to block any blow or play and defense, when Cailin Dillon walks out onto the ramp, laughing at Darkness and Ambiance tearing into each other, when suddenly she’s SPEARED by Velvet Valentine to a huge pop from the crowd as officials rush out looking to separate Darkness and Ambiance and now Velvet and Dillon.


_____________________________
***SCENE FADES TO BACKSTAGE***
_____________________________


We open with the words “Recorded Earlier Today” seen before we find ourselves in front of a building marked “Family Fun Center.” Inside we hear loud arcade machines, running and screaming children, and parents trying to keep their kids from destroying the place. There, sitting in a ball pit, is Freddy Morris, looking somewhat out of place, yet happy to be there.

Morris: “Hello Again EWS fans, Freddy Morris here! Today we’re at Family Fun Center, just outside of Las Vegas, to talk to the current Rage Superstar Champion, “The Kumquat Kid” Ryan Lewis! Now if I could only-“

As if on cue, Ryan bursts forth from under the ball pits, startling Freddy. He’s wearing full scuba gear, but we can still make out his championship wrapped around the suit, still covered in Fruit Roll Up and various action figures. Ryan removes the snorkel mask and waves to us.

Kumquat Kid: “Sorry about that Freddy! I was doing my best to honor Shark Week by investigating these bright colored waters to make sure it was safe for everyone. You never know when a plastic shark might attack this late in the summer season.”

Morris: “Well, uh, thank you, Ryan. Tell me, how has it been since becoming champion?”

Kumquat Kid: “Oh it’s been terrific. The guys in my own personal Perkin’s give me free kumquat pancakes every morning, I love getting stopped at airport security with all this metal around my waist, and my son, Huey, he didn’t even throw food or pee in my face today. Life is good!”

Morris: “Well one has to wonder how great life will be once you have your very first title defense. Tell us, do you have any favorites as to whom you’d like to face?”

Kumquat Kid: “Gee, Freddy, I haven’t really put much thought to it. I mean, it could be anybody! It could be my best friend Sentinel, the ghost of Fred Rogers, Ben Savage’s agent, the popcorn vendor during the Rage shows. It could even be Super Shredder and his SWEATY MAN BOOBS OF DOOOOOM!”

Ryan echoes that last part, giving Freddy a chuckle.

Kumquat Kid: “Say it with me, Freddy, SWEATY MAN BOOBS OF DOOOM!”

Freddy agrees, but seems hesitant joking about Corman.

Morris: “You certainly sound confident.”

Kumquat Kid: “And why not? I’ve got my health, my kumquats, my faithful Kumquatians, and even this nifty ball pit to swim around in! It seems like very few people want to see me as a champion, and that just motivates me to stay champion as long as I can, all while sticking my tongue out at them, of course.”

Morris: “Awesome! Well that does it for me. I’m Freddy Morris-“

Suddenly we see what appears to be a shark fin rising above the balls. Ryan is suddenly dragged down under the ball pit. Dunk emerges, laughing maniacally.

Dunk: “Waspinator…TERRORIZE!”

Even though he’s clad with a shark fin, Dunk buzzes for some reason, before descending back into the pit, in a slow, dramatic fashion. Freddy just shakes his head with a smile.

Morris: “Signing off.”

_____________________________
***COMMERCIAL BREAK***
_____________________________



MAIN EVENT – RAGE SUPERSTAR #1 CONTENDER MATCH
DDV vs. Rex Riot vs. Sentinel vs. Leonard Luv
_____________________________


“HOLD UP, WAIT A MINUTE, PUT A LITTLE LOVE IN IT!”

"Luv Addict" by Family Force 5 continues as Leonard Luv emerges from the back. He does his patented Luv Strut as pink pyros crack and scream on either side of him. He struts down the ramp to the ring, paying no mind to the crowd that's booing his every move. He enters the ring and spins around, arms outstretched. Luv tosses his shades into the crowd and moonwalks into his corner, a smirk on his face as he waits for his opponents.

The opening riff of 'Thunderstruck' by AC/DC beings to play... the lights go low and Rex Riot appears on the stage, his back to the audience wearing his trademark long black trenchcoat with the initals #BAM on the back (which stands for Bad Ass Mofo). He extends his arms out, curiously with no Chloe St. Cloud at his side this time. He walks to the ring, and Rex stands on the apron arms outstreched before striking a muscle pose as white corner pyros shoot into the air.

Tom Hartman: Now isn't this interesting. I don't think we've ever seen Rex come out here without Chloe St. Cloud before.

Dexter Finch: Maybe she's sick? Wrestlers can get sick too, can't they Tom?

Tom Hartman: They sure can buddy. They sure can.

The arena is bathed in red and white light, and a spotlight highlights a silhouette at the entranceway. “Adrenaline” by Gavin Rossdale hits while red and white pyros erupt. Another spotlight comes on and reveals Sentinel, as the lights come up in the arena. He will always arrive wearing a black t-shirt (which he removes prior to the match) and either a pair of jeans or cargo shorts. As he makes his way to the ring, Sentinel will always be quick to greet fans and shake hands, and even go “above and beyond” now and then for children or fans with special needs. When he gets in the ring, he will stand in the center and raise his arms in a V and look to the sky with his eyes closed as though relishing the moment and, in turn, thanking the fans.

"HOW YOU LIKE ME NOW?"

The instrumental opening of P.O.D.s "Boom" rings through the arena as "Hoochiah" rings through the speakers as Danny De Vries pulls back the curtain and takes a few steps. He stops, stares hard at the ring and looks around at the crowd, then shouts ‘D-D-V!’ as he pumps his right fist into the air twice and then punches both fists into the air diagonally from his body, holding them in a ‘V’ shape for a few seconds.

Tom Hartman: Sentinel, Leonard Luv, Rex Riot and DDV are all set to do battle to see who will be the first one to challenge Ryan Lewis for his newly won Rage Superstar title and-... hold on, what in tarnation!

De Vries then strolls confidently down to the ring but abruptly stops when a thunderous noise cracks off the back of his skull and causes him to stumble forward holding the back of his head, revealing that the one who hit him was none other than Chloe St. Cloud with a chair in hand!

Dexter Finch: Hey she isn't sick after all! Yay!

Tom Hartman: It looks like that jezebell was waiting in the wings the whole time to get that underhanded sneak attack in and already Rex Riot is getting the edge on his rival DDV!

Despite the chair shot, DDV doesn't take too much damage from it, instead turning around towards Chloe still holding the back of his head in anger as he approaches her and she starts to back off! DDV continues moving towards her until all of a sudden he is blindsided with a mega clothesline from the running Rex Riot dropping him on the ramp as Riot starts to stomp away at him! Meanwhile, Sentinel watches from the ropes nearest the ramp, disheartened by the lack of honor in the way this match has already started when he is nailed from behind with a stiff low blow by Leonard Luv that causes him to drop to the mat instantly while Leonard Luv laughs at the toppled giant!

Tom Hartman: This match has just started and already all hell is breaking loose! These are fatal four-way rules, so it's all completely legal so far and these guys are doing everything they can to secure that title shot!

Dexter Finch: Hehe, Sentinel got hit in the balls Tom! Did you see that? Didya?

Up on the ramp, Chloe yells for Riot to continue the beatdown on DDV to which he complies by dropping to his knees and slamming his forearm into DDV as many times as he can, focusing the attack on the back of his head and his upper back while in the ring Luv stomps on the downed Sentinel a couple times and with the aid of the ropes stands on top of his back, using all the leverage he can muster to double foot stomp Sentinel's throat down into the bottom rope where he holds it and chokes the life out of Sentinel! The referee scolds Luv, but Luv waves him off since he can't be disqualified for it before stepping down of his own accord and running the ropes, coming back and dropping a running leg drop down on the back of Sentinel's neck that causes his throat to get pushed down into the bottom rope once more as Luv slides between the middle and bottom ropes to the outside of the ring seamlessly where he raises his arms into the air with a laugh to resounding boos from the audience! Sentinel drops back into the ring clutching his throat as Luv now notices the fight between DDV and Riot has only continued to escalate as they are paying no attention to the ring and he quickly scurries back into the ring for the pin on Sentinel!

...One!

...Tw-kickout!

While this is going on in the ring, out on the ramp, DDV and Riot are now on equal footing and trading hard punches back and forth as Chloe barks orders at Riot and slander at DDV. With DDV's back facing her once more, Chloe moves back up, chair still in hand and readying to swing when DDV notices her coming towards him and quickly grabs Riot's arm dragging him into the line of fire! Chloe accidentally hits Riot with the chair and Riot holds his arm in pain as DDV capitalized off the distraction and pushes Riot back first into Chloe, causing Riot to stumble back and fall down, squishing Chloe on the ramp as the chair went flying up the ramp! DDV raises his hands as the crowd cheers before picking Riot up off the now downed Chloe and dragging him back towards the ring. Meanwhile, Leonard Luv has pulled Sentinel to his feet as well and set him up for the Wild Luv Driver (cradle piledriver) only for Sentinel to explode upwards, launching Luv into the air with a big back body drop! Sentinel walks a bit wide legged, surely still stinging a bit from the low blow as he goes over to Luv who is now arching his back in pain only to pick him up again and whip him into one of the far corners followed by a striking spear that absolutely floors Luv as soon as he bounces off the turnbuckle and walks back towards the center of the ring!

Tom Hartman: High impact spear from the Rage title tournament finalist Sentinel and Leonard Luv might be a goner thanks to that hit!

Dexter Finch: Say Tom, what if Leonard Luv started wearing some really fancy gloves in his matches and he changed his name to, “Leonard Glove”! So then we could start saying, “Hold Up! Wait a Minute! Put a little glove in it”?

Tom Hartman: (After a rather awkward few seconds of silence) . . . That's an, er, “interesting” idea you have there son. . .

DDV whips Riot back into the ring and finally all four competitors are in the ring together for the first time all match. DDV attempts to hit a running knee trembler to Riot, but Riot manages to get out of the way and he shoves DDV hard this time into Sentinel who levels him with a quick clothesline before charging at Riot, doing the same thing to him! Riot quickly gets up and Sentinel catches him, raising him into the air for a backdrop but Riot counters in midair and falls on top of Sentinel for a crossbody that he holds for the cover.

...One!

...-No! DDV quickly dives in to break up the count!

DDV pulls Riot to his feet and nails him with a couple of european uppercuts and kicks to the gut, backing him into the one of the turnbuckles nearest the ramp where he raises Riot and climbs the top turnbuckle, looking for a superplex when out of nowhere Leonard Luv sprints across the ring and vaults off of Sentinel's back, landing a picture perfect dropkick straight into DDV's back, sending him sailing off the turnbuckle to the outside of the ring right in front of Chloe St. Cloud who has finally made her way to the ring! Luv falls back down to the mat, landing on Sentinel with an unplanned elbow drop as Riot reels back on the top turnbuckle trying to keep himself from falling after absorbing some of the shock of the dropkick and DDV almost taking him down to the outside with him while on the outside Chloe shrieks at the fallen DDV and throws a flurry of slaps at him for pushing Riot into her earlier! Luv is the first to his feet, noticing the teetering and dazed Riot sitting precariously on the top turnbuckle, and with a small smirk, he gets to his feet and quickly runs up the turnbuckle and wraps his legs around Riot's neck, tossing him back towards the center of the ring with an amazing frankensteiner that once again results in Riot landing on top of Sentinel!

Tom Hartman: Man, Leonard Luv is doing a great job of using his opponents against each other right now! If things keep going the way they are, he might be heading for a title shot by the end of this!

Dexter Finch: Luv shack baby! Luv shack!

All three men in the ring are down on the mat and Chloe has relented her physical attack on DDV, but not her verbal one. Of course Luv is the first to his feet having sustained the least of the recent damage and it doesn't take too long for him to move over to Rex Riot who is also staggering to his feet where he locks him up and attempts to land his Luv Handle (Spinning Killswitch) finisher, but Riot slips out and wrap his arms around Luv, tossing Leonard Luv back for a big german suplex instead! He maintains the lock and throws Luv for a second german suplex as well landing him hard once again and as he raises him to his feet for a third german suplex, Sentinel gets to his feet and grabs Rex Riot by the waist as well! With a mighty heave of strength, Sentinel lifts Riot and Leonard Luv, causing Riot to throw Luv across the ring as both Luv and Riot hit the mat for an incredible double-deckered german suplex and the fans are going crazy!

Tom Hartman: That was an incredible feat of strength from Sentinel! After coming up just short of the title against his good friend at Clash of the Titans II, you've gotta know how badly he wants another shot at the big one!

Dexter Finch: Don't we all Tom?

With all three men down once again, the fans are cheering loudly for the effort all of them have put into trying to become the next challenger for the title! As loud as their cheering is, it only gets that much louder when Danny De Vries rolls back into the ring to become the only man standing! DDV surveys the damage looking for a place to start when Leonard Luv makes the decision for him by starting to stagger to his feet with his back turned towards DDV and as soon Luv turns around, DDV raises him onto his shoulders and drops him for the rest of the Breathless fireman's carry double knee gutbuster! Leonard Luv clutches at his stomach and rolls to the outside of the ring as DDV gets up still getting a huge ovation from the crowd and turns around only to be caught with a huge flying forearm from Rex Riot! Riot kips up immediately afterward only to see Sentinel up again and barreling towards him! Riot ducks the clothesline attempt and as soon as Sentinel rebounds off the ropes, he catches Sentinel with a jumping knee lift that drops Sentinel to the mat once again, which he immediately follows up by throwing the devil horns sign into the air and sticking his tongue out to a round of boos before turning back to face DDV! Riot shouts something right in DDV's face as DDV slowly gets to his knees, but DDV retaliates with a huge right hand to the face! DDV gets to his feet and the two begin traded punches back and forth once more in the center of the ring until Riot grabs DDV's arm and swings it around DDV's neck as he positions behind him and lifts him into the air in position for the Thunderstrike (cutthroat driver)! Riot sets up and just as he's about to drive him into the mat, DDV struggles out and lands behind him only to just as quickly grab Riot as he stumbled backwards, dumping him to the outside of the ring with a huge backdrop! Rex Riot falls back first onto the apron and rolls to the floor at Chloe's feet as DDV returns to his feet smiling only to get a boot to the gut as soon as he turns around by Sentinel! Sentinel raises him into the air for a vertical suplex, but once again DDV slips out the back and hooks Sentinel's head in a cravat and drops him to the mat hard with the DDV Driver (snapmare driver)! DDV goes in for the cover!

...One!

...Two!!

...Three!!!

No! Chloe St. Cloud grabbed the referee's foot and yanked him to the outside of the ring at the last possible moment!

Dexter Finch: How feisty! Me-ow! She can tug on my zebra stripes any day!

Tom Harman: Damn it all! DDV rightfully had this match won until Chloe saved the match for her current love interest! Wait, what did you just say?

Dexter Finch: I said she could tug on my-

Tom Hartman: -Actually, forget I asked.

Chloe urges Rex Riot to get up while DDV shouts at her from inside the ring for her interference when suddenly Ember Garfield bursts out of the back and down to ringside where she hits Chloe so hard with a spear that Chloe was literally speared out of her high heels (they went flying into the crowd too)! DDV smiles a little bit as Ember starts to hammer away at Chloe and Riot tries to get up on the outside of the ring, watching it all go down!

Tom Hartman: And now Ember Garfield is here too! This is pandemonium!

Dexter Finch: Panda-moan-E-um Tom!

The referee returns to his feet gingerly as DDV shouts for him to get up and count the pinfall when all of sudden he is blindsided by a high knee lift from Leonard Luv that sends DDV flying through the ropes and crashing into Rex Riot as both of them hit the floor hard on the outside and the referee slides back into the ring, overwhelmed by the chaos that he was charged with keeping order of! Luv tells the referee to get over as he tells the audience that he's about to ‘put a little luv into the Rage Superstar title match’ and when he's done with that, he moves over to Sentinel laying on the mat intending to go for one of his finishers when suddenly Sentinel snaps him downwards instead into a gogoplata submission!

Tom Hartman: Gogoplata! Gogoplata! Leonard Luv might have no choice to tap out!

Dexter Finch: (singing) Go--go go-go-plata! Sing it with me Tom!

Luv struggles in the hold trying to find any way to get out of the hold, but he's trapped in the center of the ring and both of their other opponents are down on the outside of the ring as Ember and Chloe are still brawling as well! Sentinel yanks Luv's neck down into his leg as hard as he can and Luv holds his hand high into the air, considering tapping when Sentinel rolls his shoulders down onto the mat without either of them realizing it!

...One!

...Two!!

Luv throws his hand down to the mat tapping at the same time the referee counts…

...Three!!!

The audience is in an uproar as the referee signals for the bell and Sentinel lets go of the hold and no one is sure who just won! The referee moves out of the ring and starts to explain the results to Cordelia Stuart while both of them roll over wondering what the official decision is!

Tom Hartman: By gawd was that a close call! The referee finished the pin count right as Leonard Luv started tapping out! How is this possible?

After a very suspenseful few moments, Cordelia Steward raises the mic to her lips and announces the official decision as the referee moves between them…

Cordelia Stewart: Ladies and Gentlemen, your winner of the match… and the new #1 contender for the Rage Superstar title. . . . . . . . Sentinel!!!

Sentinel raises his arms into the air in victory as Leonard Luv's eyes go wide immediately as he begins to furiously complain about the finish and how he should have won! “Adrenaline” kicks back in as Sentinel starts to celebrate his victory- that is until he is cut off by “Sabotage" by the Beastie Boys and out comes none other than Commissioner Steve Corman with a mic in his hand…

Commish Corman: That was a fantastic match gentlemen, you should all be proud. BUT… I just rewatched that finish twice and I am not in the habbit of overturning referee’s decisions… but…

Leonard Luv’s eyes and lips grow wide with anticipation…

Commish Corman: That tap out, was at the exact same time as the pinfall. Making both of these men legitimate winners of this match in my eyes. THEREFORE, at the SANKE EYES iPPV, it’ll be The Flying Rodent Pinky Lewis, putting his fruit roll up joke of a title on the line against Sentinel… AND ‘The Luv Guru Himself’… LEONARD LUV!!!!

Luv literally jumps up for joy, clicking his heels, then laughingly points at Sentinel rubbing it in that he has pinned Sentinel, two shows in a row! Sentinel then reminds Luv that he just made him tap out and WILL do it again at the SNAKE EYES iPPV! The two men continue to verbally joust as "Sell Out" by Reel Big Fish kicks in and Ryan Lewis walks out taking a sharp left in front of Corman and shoving the Fruit Roll Up/Action figure title into his face, to end this weeks show.


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