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Jez 'Kicker' Teabag
Topic Started: Aug 25 2009, 10:07 PM (165 Views)
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Character Name: Jez Teabag
Nickname: Kicker
Race: Human
Class: Sword Wyvern
Gender: Male
Alignment: Prospero
True Age: 20
Apparent Age: 20
Height: 6'1"
Weight: 195lbs

Physical Appearance: Kicker has permanently windswept blonde hair and bluebell eyes. His face is surprisingly smooth for a swordsman, and he has never been in danger of growing any real bodily hair. He is really quite pretty; the only regular complaint about his appearance is his frequently gormless expression.

Personality: dim-witted and accepting, Kicker's goals in life include sex, fighting and alcohol, although he shares Prospero's love of a tall glass of semi-skimmed milk. He is affable, if objectionably narrow in his perception of feminine good looks (which occupies a good deal of his conversational line). His customary observation upon arriving at any new places is 'Some chicks.'

Biography: Kicker was named Jez Teabag Junior after his father, but soon earned himself the nickname 'Kicker' among the wretches of Mackily owing to his muscular legs and penchant for breaking shins. He did this roughly as often on Prospero's orders as not, and only once on Prospero himself. He was forbidden milk for a week, and never did it again. The name 'Prospy' has also been banned in public under this penalty.

An unfortunate incident at the hands (et al) of a giant lumberjack scarred Kicker's childhood years when he was fourteen. The loss of his father barely registered, although he retains a nagging suspicion that it was his own fault; Prospero never confirms this, but never denies it either. In fact, the point is never raised, but Kicker feels the logic still applies in theory. Kicker has strong recollections of his mother and her colossal anger whenever he stole a cookie, or Prospero blamed it on him, and this alone is enough to stop him feeling homesick in their lower moments on the road.

Kicker has one feature which he feels detracts significantly from his pulling abilities: a certain female wyvern, which Leonard considerately named Suzanne, has an unbreakable and terrifyingly strong infatuation with him. Nobody knows how this came about; he woke up one morning and the wyvern was crooning over him. He batted her away, but she follows them wherever they go. The most unsettling thing is her automatic reaction to when he is in danger: Suzanne swoops down without warning and scoops Kicker onto her back, sometimes putting his valued regions at severe risk with her neck action. This effectively removes him from danger, and it is only with very strong urging that Kicker persuades her to descend to such a height as he can use his long sword as they pass by. Thus Kicker is an 'accidental' wyvern rider; he would love a tough, obedient male wyvern as a showing-off tool, but all he has is a sexually confused and exceptionally clingy female who refuses to allow him to show off his swordplay. Execution has been considered, but Prospero considers Suzanne such an asset to their hireability that he has expressly forbidden this. And if Prospero forbids, Kicker does not do.
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