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Participation Trophy Not Found
Topic Started: Apr 9 2017, 12:22 PM (169 Views)
Brian Stryker

The door opened as Brian Stryker walked into this annoying building, his son Richie in his arm. Brian had no idea why he was the one who had to take Richie to this stupid playgroup. He was the only dad here in a sea of women who all just loved to judge Brian.

BRIAN STRYKER: Alright Richie, remember what mommy said. No wrestling with the other kids.

He looked around to make sure as he checked to see if anyone was listening.

BRIAN STRYKER: But if you “accidently” spear someone I won’t get mad.

He grins as he pats Richie on the head and messes with his hair as Richie laughs. He turns tail and runs into the giant foam jungle gym room where all the kids could, in the words of this group, “play in a safe and nurturing environment”. Brian thought it was all a load of crap. He hated being with this new age parents. They were so annoying. Not only did they subscribe to that 2017 idea of parenting by being “your child’s friend instead of parent to instill a sense of friendship instead of blah blah blah.”

Brian thought they were all raising a generation of wimps and assholes who were gonna feel entitled. Brian looked at the group of moms, who almost in a Stepford Wives like moment, all turned to him and just glared daggers at him. He felt like they were trying to set him on fire. He hated every last one of these women, mostly cause they treated him like crap anyways. Saying condescending things about the fact he was a wrestler and he was the one bringing Richie instead of Brooke.

WOMAN in CHARGE: Ah Mr. Dougherty. Nice to see you again.

Brian looked over at the women who ran this little group. She was kinda nice to him but she still loved to give those back handed compliments. She annoyed Brian on the first day when she asked Richie “if daddy did anything at home that made him a bad man.” Literally grilling his son to see if he was drinking or whatever. Ever since then Brian just kept his distance.

BRIAN STRYKER: Hi Kathy.

KATHY: It’s just so nice having Richie around. He’s such a special little guy.

BRIAN STRYKER: Yeah he is.

KATHY: There’s just one thing…He seems to be a competitive child. And he in Playjubriee we try not to teach kids being competitive is not the way to go through life. That everyone deserves to praise even if they don’t exactly “Win”

This made Brian’s brain ooze out his head.

BRIAN STRYKER: Wait…you don’t want the kids to be competitive because…..you don’t want the kids to feel bad about losing?

KATHY: I know that may be hard for you to understand, given your….profession…but all the parenting magazines say that children who grow up without being taught it’s not about winning and losing are more accepting of others.

BRIAN STRYKER: Ah yeah, that article in Bullshit Magazine.

KATHY: Mr. Dougherty! You are aware we don’t allow that kind of damaging language in this building.

BRIAN STRYKER: I’m not the one who’s spewing the most ridiculous thing I ever heard, and that’s saying something.

KATHY: We are a nurturing environment Mr. Dougherty. We are in charge of making sure these children learn that it’s not about the things that separate us. That being number 1 isn’t the only thing in the world.

BRIAN STRYKER: So what happens when these kids are adults and are at a job interview for one job? You expect them to think the guy hiring is just gonna hire them all? What about if they get into sports in high school? You think they’re gonna stand on that field and accept a lose because hey, at least they tried.

KATHY: Now Mr. Dougherty, I know this may be hard to understand given your…..upbringing….but this isn’t the 80s or 90s. We have grown as people and as society. You just have to admit this is how kids should be raised.

Brian never thought about hitting a woman that wasn’t a wrestler. He never wanted to. But Jesus this idiot of a woman was pushing that limit.

BRIAN STRYKER: My upbringing? You mean growing up without a father? Growing up poor? Growing up knowing that this world doesn’t care if you “tried your best”?

KATHY: You know there’s more to life than just winning.

BRIAN STRYKER: Yeah, like being one of these mindless spoiled bitches of kids that think because someone doesn’t subscribe to their way of thinking they are dangerous and that all opposite opinions don’t matter.

KATHY: Well unless he learns the right way to look at things, it won’t. And seeing how you’re not exactly of sound mind, given the constant concussions your profession has, I doubt you could show him that anyways.

Brian walks up to the door to the playroom and whistles. Richie looks up and knows that whistle means he needs to go to his dad. He runs over without missing a beat.

BRIAN STRYKER: Come on Richie, we’re getting out of here before they start saying you are covered in Gluten or something.

KATHY: Mr. Dougherty, isn’t this a bit much?

BRIAN STRYKER: Oh insulting me, my job, my upbringing, and how I decided to raise my son, and me not wanting to hear/take this kinda of crap is much? You are raising of generation of peanut allergy, spoiled, idiots. I weep for the future when these kids are in charge of anything. My son is gonna grow up knowing that being competitive isn’t the worst thing. He’s gonna learn that to be the best you gotta work the hardest. No one is gonna hand him anything in life. Screw you, screw your participation trophy, screw this new age bullshit. I expect a refund check in the mail.

Brian shakes his head as he walks out of this god awful place and looks at his son.

BRIAN STRYKER: Who wants ice cream?

Richie raises his hands above his head and cheers as Brian laughs and walks back to his car.
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