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Nameless Road: Finale
Topic Started: Jun 13 2017, 07:25 AM (118 Views)
Nina Stokes
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Never in all of my life have I ever been so fucking happy that this is my personal journal. Why would I say that? Well, I say that because what I’m about write down would probably come as shock to many (well, I’m going to recite it...speech to text program...arm still hurts). However, I speak it out of personal experience. So, I just going to go ahead and let it out…

There is a grand feeling of liberation that come along with having a championship belt relinquished from you. And along with that liberation comes knowledge and further understanding.

There, I wrote it down. It’s out there. And yeah, I know that sounds kinda’ wild. However, I didn’t always think in that manner. Let’s say it’s the recent result of enlightenment.

Ha, enlightenment...

August 9th, 2015—Darkness Falls Pay-Per-View. That was an interesting day, to say the least. You see, that was the day that I lost the Hard Knox Wrestling Bloodlust Championship.

That seventeen minutes felt like two eternities. It was a deathmatch fan’s wet dream. Trash cans, plywood, steel chairs, barbwire, light tubes, death defying moves. What more could a person ask for?

It was a painful match. I felt that shit for weeks. However, truth be told, the physical pain didn’t linger as much as the emotional pain—

I put a great deal of pressure upon myself during my first year in professional wrestling. Some people say I wanted too much too fast—they were probably right. But, I wasn’t trying to be greedy. Wrestling had been a dream of mine all my life, and it took so many years to achieve it. It so many sacrifices to come true. So yeah, I fought with a great sense of urgency.

And one of the things that was truly urgent to me was winning my first championship. That happened when I won the Bloodlust title.

What hurt the most about losing the Bloodlust Championship (at the time), wasn’t that I lost it to a jealous friend. And it wasn’t that I was bloody and cut up. It was the fact that said championship, my very first title belt, the same belt that I had risked life and limb to defend, was suddenly out of my possession.

I felt naked. I felt lost.

Back when I won that belt, I wanted to hold onto it forever. The No Limits Championship had escaped me many times, but that one was finally in my grasp. I wanted to do so much more with the belt. I wanted to defend it more, take it across the world three times over.

It hurt me that I had lost the belt. And it also hurt me that I hadn’t done everything that I wanted to do with that first ever reign...

Those were my thoughts and feelings about losing the belt back then. Now though, I’m a bit older. I’m a bit more wise (a bit). Now, losing that Bloodlust title doesn’t bother me, because I fully realize that I did something special. I was the first champion, and I did the best I could to uplift it. I’m proud of that, you know?

The liberation occurs when I look back upon that time and reflect. It was easy to get caught up in the moment back then. But now I see how great it really was.

Besides, every champion losses eventually. No wrestler wants to admit that, especially when they are holding the belt. However, it’s merely the Circle of Life.

I also experienced that feeling of liberation after my run as the Fight One Fury Champion.

It’s been brought to my attention that I don’t mention that reign much. And honestly, it’s because I’m not sure how to. In truth, it was a championship that no one actually saw me winning in the first place. The champion at the time was a man named Victor Wylde. He’d beaten my girl Lyza to get the belt, and he was poised to skyrocket throughout the stratosphere…

Then I came along.

His major downfall was that he’d royally pissed me off with some comments he’d made about me. Couldn’t let that stand. When the championship match was made, I wanted to see him demolished.

Needless to say, I won that match.

I didn’t hold the Fury Championship very long. I won it, successfully defended it once, and then lost it in the next go around.

But, wait for it!

The liberating and revelation part, ready? Losing that belt helped me see a few things. In that short period of time, I proved to myself once again that I could thrive outside of HKW. I’d proven that already with other promotions, but it was another reassurance. I proved to myself that my reign with the Bloodlust title wasn’t a fluke, that I had the skill and talent to win the “big match”. And lastly, even though I had only one successful defense, I was told by many fans that subsequent champions sang praises of my dominance after I’d left the company.

—So, what do I take away from losing the Lionheart Championship? What’s the liberating part?

I’ve spoken and written the following many times, but it bears repeating. I had specific goal in mind for the division when I won the Lionheart Championship. In my third eye, I saw a division where competitors from all walks of life could thrive, as long as the talent and drive are there. And personally, I’d say I delivered in spades.

Hell, that fact that DeMarcus succeeded me proves that my vision has been implemented. In that past, a wrestler of his nature would have had his eyes solely focused on the Global Championship. But, that wasn’t his focus; he set his eyes on the Lionheart Championship—I think that’s something to be proud of.

I hope his reign is successful. He has all the skill, talent, and brainpower needed. The Lionheart Division is in good hands.

And now that I now longer have the belt, I’m free to relish and revel in what I’ve accomplished:


  • 371 Days
  • 3 Successful Defenses
  • Infinite Memories

I don’t usually brag to much about myself, or at least I try not to. However, I’m going to brag right now. I did some amazing shit. I did some shit that most people can’t do (there aren’t many year long reigns these days)—and I’m proud of that. I’ve got a right to be.

A couple more takeaways. It’s easy to slip up or break under pressure. During my Lionheart reign the pressure was always on, but I embraced it and held my head high. I continued to show that I thrive in big matches. And lastly, there should no question to my talent, as to how far I’ll go to get the job done...

/

Soooooo, I guess the major question is—what now, hmm?

Before I answer that though, let me give you some insight into something. Something that the cameras didn’t show.

It took a considerable amount of time before Marcus’ music faded. He beat me fair and square. He deserved that moment. But eventually, his music did fade, and he left the ring. It was around that time that I began to stir around a bit more. I sat up, and a whole bunch of pain hit me like a tidal wave. The referee came over and some officials entered the ring to try and help me up. I pushed them away. Call it stubbornness, call it being prideful...whichever. It wasn’t that I didn’t appreciate it, but I couldn’t accept their help. I needed to get up on my own, for my sake.

After a bit, I was able to get up on my own accord. My arm was hurting like hell. I was tired beyond belief. That’s when something happened. I heard this sound. I glanced upward as my ears perked up. It was deafening.

As I stared out at the crowd, I heard their cheers. I heard their claps. I heard their whistles. I know some of my words throughout my reign probably rubbed them the wrong way. But in that moment, it’s like that shit didn’t matter. They showered me in praise for the match, and for all that hard work. It was much appreciated.

My family was sitting ringside. My dad and bro were clapping; mom had tears in her eyes. It was one of few events that she mustered up the courage to come see live. Those tears were really flowing, but I gave her a live and let her know I was good. Then, I held onto my arm and walked to the back.

Some trainers gave me some ice for my arm. Then, I had to go speak with some HKW officials. I thanked them for the opportunities they’d given me. Then I signed a bunch of forms.

I’m sure one could guess what was written on them.

So, what’s next for Nina Stokes? Rest, recovery, maybe a little relaxation. Right now, my body is telling me that I need to rest. Therefore, I’m going to listen and give it the rest it deserves.

Naw, I’m not retired—there’s so much more that I want to do in this sport.

But for now, I’m going to sit my ass down and let myself heal. Hell, maybe me and Ryan will finally take that honeymoon (we both were working heavy last year, didn’t have the time).

Well, I suppose that’s all I’ve got. For now, I’m going to go chill. There’s a Cheesecake Factory Tiramisu cheesecake waiting for me in the fridge. So, there’s where I’m about to be.

Peace journal!

Fin. (for now)
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