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Letters From The Past; Y4, D5, Halloween. Evening.
Topic Started: May 8 2014, 11:40:56 PM (358 Views)
Castor Greengrass
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Cast had been planning on going down to the feast. There were a few reasons. Most of them revolved around that Elliot girl. Only one vaguely revolved around the thought that he was actually sort of hungry. The Ravenclaw had, instead, had a large stack of letters deposited into his lap. Curiosity had him tearing into the first of them. From one Milicent Greengrass. And the next. And the next. Until his eyes ached because he couldn't stop reading and rereading. Surely he forgot to blink for he had been deprived of any contact with his parents since before he could properly remember. He craved it. More than he cared to admit. His heart ached. The Ravenclaw almost couldn't stand it.

Beloved son.

The words were cruel and twisted, at times. This he knew. There was a depravity in his mother's writing that hinted towards her insanity. Still. He wanted to sort them. She had thought of him often. Written to him from her cell. For some reason she had been able to send these to him now. There were no dates on any of the letters, which made his task harder... But the letters read like journal entries and he was sure that, given enough diligence, he would be able to organize them... and to read them in the order they had been written. Cast didn't know why this was so important to him. No thought was given to Ryan Elliot, or much else, as he spent the evening toiling. Letters were spread out on the floor before him. Luckily the common room was pretty empty and no one complained about how much room he was taking up.
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Ryan Elliot
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If you don't stand for something, you might fall for anything.

Ryan was overwhelmed. She had spent some time trying to calm Lis down. Her poor twin was mortified after having set her crush on fire. Generally Ryan was not ok with doing things like having her sister sedated. The nurses had no clue what to do, and the place seemed a mess, but Ryan brought her sister up to the hospital wing, sat with her twin and waited. Waited for Lis to calm down. She didn't leave her side until the Slytherin was fast asleep. It wasn't until then, when her sister's breathing had become deep and steady, that Ryan cried. She cried for her sister, cried for herself. Their lives were messes. She wanted to help Lis be normal. She held onto the whole ability thing on her end pretty well. Lis was a different story, and Ryan felt like there was nothing she could do to help the Slytherin. She just didn't know how.
Plus she had just straight up spilled everything to Ree. Blew Jason's cover. The Air Elementus was generally ashamed of herself for her behavior. She could not entirely blame Jason for acting the way that he had. Ree was close, probably heard the older girl practically yelling about the fact that they didn't kiss. Unfortunately, kissing Jason was not something that she wanted. She wanted out of the lie.
Ryan had thought before, to search high and low in the castle to find Cast. Now, with her makeup messed up, eyes red and puffy, she hoped to not come across him. She felt selfish and stupid and alone. She just wanted to go up to her dorm and cry quietly into her pillow. What was even wrong with her?
Upon entering the common room, Ryan was met with the sight of the one person she wanted to avoid in her current state. She lowered her head, attempted to sneak by as best as she could. Her peripheral was blurry, tears still running down her face. She managed to bump into something, catching herself on the same table to not fall. Her other hand, out of frustration slammed down on the table, with it came a burst of her power, making the damned thing slide away almost a foot away, knocking over a plant in the center, shattering the vase. Water splashed along the table and over the carpet. This of course, a broken fucking vase was minor in comparison to the destruction that had been tossed up in the great hall. She groaned in frustration. Tears began to flow more freely from her eyes again.
She was a wreck. Still, she had hoped that whatever he'd been so involved in as she entered had still kept his focus through it all. She staggered on, heading towards the stairs to the dorm.
Edited by Ryan Elliot, May 11 2014, 07:11:57 AM.
You've never seen a fight like this before
I'll take you down and leave you wanting more
You've crossed a line that I cannot ignore
You've never seen a fight like this before

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Castor Greengrass
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Cast nearly jumped out of his skin as a vase shattered on the floor. A flick of his wand had the letters quietly filing back into his bag. "Ryan?" He was unsure, because he had never seen anyone look so upset. It made his heart ache something fierce. Like he'd gotten caught up in something he shouldn't have only to miss something obviously important. The girl kept walking, probably not wanting company at all but he lunged for her even despite the fact that she'd just blown an end table a few feet away and broken something. "Woah, hey. Ry." He practically launched over the couch in order to get to her quicker. There was concern in his tone but he stopped himself short of actually touching her. Genuine, real and really confused concern. Castor was generally pretty good at not displaying things. This was different. Fucking what was he even supposed to do in a situation like this? Any thoughts of what had previously been so important were vanished.

"Stop for a sec, would you? Let me help." Even just to get her up the stairs properly. He was in front of her, trying to pull her attention. "Look at me. Focus." There was this thing about stressful situations that had you thinking about way too many things. If she could focus in on one thing it might help her calm down a little. "Please." How could he possibly help? His tone was much calmer than what most people would expect of someone desperate. He tried not to look frantic for her sake. She needed to be calmed, right?
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Ryan Elliot
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If you don't stand for something, you might fall for anything.

When he said her name she shook her head. She could do nothing right. He was in front of her suddenly, not allowing her to move up to her bed. She'd never heard his voice in such a tone. Concerned for her. Not teasing. God it was tempting to fall against him and just cry, but she was unsure if the damned curse she carried around with her wouldn't fuck him up.
Look at me. She did. Everything was so fuzzy, there were two of him dancing around as she tried hard to focus. She couldn't talk, nothing would make sense between her sobs, she knew. Again she shook her head, lowered it. She was trying to relax. A hand came up to wipe some tears away from her already smudged face.
The girl swallowed, took a deep breath. Two, three, four. She could feel herself slowing down. It took a long time to relax. She looked up at the man again, but it only made it worse. A headache was forming. She was frustrated. "I.." She started, swallowed to avoid another wave of tears, "Jason. I'm not.." She shook her head, again. She was afraid to move. Terrified of herself. Not wanting to hurt him. She did understand how Lis felt, how Ree felt. She acted so much like she didn't. Ryan was getting tired of the act, "I'm not his girlfriend. I never was and.." Why did he need to know this?
She played back in her mind from the moment they met, every instance they had been together since. It had only been a few weeks? He really really seemed to care? He hadn't left the room when she'd thrown the childish fit she had. He wasn't stupid, that she knew, but why had he put himself directly in harm's way? She looked up, searched out his eyes, locked in on them. "You didn't run away?" The girl didn't understand, but she wasn't really trying to. He wanted to help her, she didn't know how he could. He was just being really sweet, and couldn't help but be drawn in by the concern. The fact that he cared. "Thank you." She said finally. She appreciated more than he knew, that he would be alarmed for her. It was then that she realized he might have been expecting something crazy to have happened. More kidnapping, or someone dying. You never knew what could happen at a dance at this school. "It's nothing important.. I think everyone is alive and ok for the most part. I didn't mean to worry you. Um." She shook her head again. It was less likely that he was concerned for her alone. More like the school as a whole. Suddenly her problems seemed so stupid and small? "I'm going to be ok." She attempted to assure him. She took out her wand to fix the vase.
Edited by Ryan Elliot, May 11 2014, 02:26:03 AM.
You've never seen a fight like this before
I'll take you down and leave you wanting more
You've crossed a line that I cannot ignore
You've never seen a fight like this before

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Castor Greengrass
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Cast hadn't previously given himself time to think about the fact that he shouldn't be this concerned for her. It shouldn't hurt him to see her upset. They barely knew each other. She mentioned Jason and his hands balled into fists. That prick who had come up to him all threats about what would happen if she got hurt? Or was he angry because Ryan was somehow this upset over him? It was really fucking difficult to tell. They weren't together, though? He didn't understand. "He told me." Cast said, unthinkingly, stiffly. He realized how wrong it would be to assert some sort of claim on her right now. She was upset and whatever and he wasn't about to take advantage. Wasn't.

You didn't run away? His eyebrows furrowed. "From?" Realization came momentarily after. She was dangerous. Cast hadn't really expected her to injure him. "Well, I was sort of hoping you'd throw me against a wall." This was more normal, even if she was still upset. Ryan seemed to have calmed. Castor didn't know if this was a good thing. It might have been better for her to go into her room to cry, rather than act like she was alright for his sake.

"Are you sure?" The Ravenclaw didn't mean to question her, just to make it known that it was alright if she wanted to talk to him. He didn't give a single shit about the rest of the school. In fact, he'd been sort of confused when she'd brought it up, like maybe something bigger scale had happened. A horrifying moment had him wondering if it could possibly tie into the package of letters he had received. Not that any of this remained in his thoughts for very long. He wanted to reach out for her, but was unsure of how such a gesture would be received and so he stayed where he was, quietly ignoring the thought that he wanted to hold her for his own sake. As though he was the one who needed to be assured and calmed.
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Ryan Elliot
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If you don't stand for something, you might fall for anything.

"He..." Ryan's eyes widened. When? The men weren't in the same house, didn't take the same classes. When had Jason ever had time to actually tell Cast about it? "I.." Now she felt stupid. Really stupid. She looked away from him. She could have been honest with him this whole time. Jason could have told her. Cast could have told her. Ry saw something, though, he was angry, but she didn't know why.
Had he not seen the damage she'd just caused? The man's comment threw her into a more normal state, red in the face, "It probably wouldn't have been pleasant." She avoided the implication, stated the obvious. She was still kind of trying to figure out when Jason had told him, trying not to focus too much on Cast. He was too distracting. She knew she could just ask him, but she almost didn't want to.
Was she sure if she was ok? No. The vase was quickly mended, the table was pulled back into it's place. It bumped lightly against her hip. At least she could just relax now. A little.
Then she realized; he had known. Castor knew that she and Jason weren't actually together. Did it matter how long? No. It didn't. He'd remained interested. He was concerned for her. The Ravenclaw looked up to him, stepped in close. Everything she'd thought about, wanted; spent time controlling herself... and for what? So he wouldn't look think badly of her? Not to mention the fact that that he knew more about her than most people did, including her power. He was even joking with her about it, tried to make her smile or laugh.. or make her face red, which he liked so much.
He'd known. He'd known. That was the point. She had nothing to prove, and she felt he didn't either. An arm went up around his neck. She pulled him down a little, but stood on her toes. Her lips against his felt so amazing. She was free. She could kiss him like this as long as he'd let her, and she was pretty fucking ok with that.
Edited by Ryan Elliot, May 13 2014, 08:57:35 AM.
You've never seen a fight like this before
I'll take you down and leave you wanting more
You've crossed a line that I cannot ignore
You've never seen a fight like this before

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Castor Greengrass
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Castor realized this was probably a thing she was better off not knowing. It felt stupid to enlighten her to the fact that he'd been purposefully messing around with her emotions, or whatever the hell he had been doing in not telling her. The Ravenclaw knew it didn't have anything to do with Jason's imploring him not to. Well, if anything else, it seemed to get her mind off of whatever else she had thinking about. Should that really be good enough? Now she's thinking about you being an asshole. Thinking about you.

"I was counting on it." This was more normal between them. Was that better? Besides, one didn't generally get thrown into walls because they liked how uncomfortable the wall was. It really had to do with other things.

What. Was the predominant thought as her arm wrapped around his neck. Cast was a bit too stunned to do anything but sink into what she desired from him. It felt sort of wrong. He didn't even know why. Something to do with the tears that had yet to dry on her face. Not even mentioning he couldn't properly reason why she would suddenly just... without even telling him what had upset her in the first place. He had literally done nothing besides seeing if she was going to be alright - which was pretty much what any decent human being would fucking do. The Ravenclaw didn't really want to discourage her from doing this in the future though? Plus it was nice having her close? Comforting. Fuck, his thoughts were a mess.

"Ryan..." It was hard to think with his mind spinning as it was. "You're upset?" Hard to tell. She definitely had been. He didn't remember wrapping his arms around her. The thumb of one hand was wiping away the evidence that had been. Make up was smudged down her cheeks. It didn't bother him. He doubted anything would, in regards to her. "We could just talk." Cast didn't really get it. Whatever, right?
Edited by Castor Greengrass, May 14 2014, 07:36:17 AM.
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Ryan Elliot
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If you don't stand for something, you might fall for anything.

Ryan closed her eyes and sighed in frustration, I.. Get it. Sorry to disappoint you, but if you get that vase to talk, it might allow you to live vicariously through it." She shook her head, wanting to remain annoyed, but the image of him trying to communicate with the thing made her smile slightly. She tried to hold it back, honest to God she did, but she really failed miserably.
Ryan felt his arms around her. Well enough, it only added to the effect of the kiss. For a moment he didn't seem to mind, a long moment. She appreciated him more and more every second. Don't mind me, sir. Just an angry, confused, and sad girl suddenly taking advantage of your kindness. Ryan didn't even know who she was right then. She could blame him again, the thought of telling him this was all his fault made her grin into the kiss before he pulled away from her. She tried to hide her disappointment when he paused to remind her about why they had gotten to this in the first place. He was smudging her makeup further, but she'd forgotten about that as he spoke her name and felt his thumb brush against her cheek. Then he said something she didn't expect? Did she want to talk? "Mr. Greengrass, why are you such a tease?" She smirked, "Telling a girl you were hopeful that she'd throw you into a wall and then asking her if she'd rather just talk?" He did have a point, though. She was in a iffy state of mind. Not really bad, but also not very good, either. She stuck her tongue out at him, but her tone was serious when she spoke next, "Thank you." It hadn't occurred to her that he may need to talk also. "Let's um.." He'd have to let go of her first, to get comfortable somewhere and talk.
Edited by Ryan Elliot, May 14 2014, 08:23:47 AM.
You've never seen a fight like this before
I'll take you down and leave you wanting more
You've crossed a line that I cannot ignore
You've never seen a fight like this before

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Jennnnnnnn!
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Castor Greengrass
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Castor smiled at her suggestion. Mostly because she'd seen her smile, and that made him feel pretty alright about everything that was going on. Or better, maybe. He generally distanced himself from stuff like this. With his foster family. With anyone. It was too personal. One of the earliest lessons for the Ravenclaw was to not get attached to things. He'd been in too many homes to ever think it was a good idea. Yet here he was. Confused an distraught for her sake for some reason. Cast hadn't even realized it had been happening. She shoved herself into his presence, a lot like Haven did... but Haven was way more aggressive and easy to ignore. Maybe?

She was grinning around him a lot. Did he make her feel better somehow? It wasn't like he was particularly funny... or well meaning or anything. Tease. He was the tease. Probably pointing out that she had been the one pretending to have a boyfriend while flirting with him was bad? He instead looked at her with an expression that was mildly bemused. Had the kissing been his fault? He really hadn't intended to take advantage of her. She was cute and if she thought he was letting her go she was wrong? The bemusement deepened. Cast decided not to say anything, although maybe he should have. It probably wouldn't take her long to figure out why he was grinning, right? Sitting would probably be a good idea if they were talking but he couldn't really convince his arms to move for some reason. Like maybe she was going to run up the stairs if he released her prematurely. Right.
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Ryan Elliot
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If you don't stand for something, you might fall for anything.

Cast smiled back at her. Dammit, it was nice to see him smile because she had, genuinely. Especially after all the sad and scared faces that she had already seen that night, and the look of concern he'd had for her earlier, 'This probably sounds stupid, but it's almost annoying how quickly you make me forget the things that are bothering me."
The boy didn't move at her suggestion. After a few moments she rose an eyebrow at him, "What are you doing?" She wasn't concerned, really, which was made obvious when the question was followed by a giggle, "Come on, Cast." Her hands grabbed for his arms, trying to push them away from her so he'd let her go, but his grip tightened around her. This resulted in some struggle for a minute, she was laughing through it. There had almost been a show put on, which probably would have resulted in him being thrown into a wall, (as he'd expressed being hopeful for earlier,) but he'd released her before she'd felt the need. This was good, because she would have felt bad for potentially hurting him, that, and it saved her from him teasing her about it later. Instead, her way to get out was another kiss, since she was so close. She smiled against his lips again. His grip loosened and she broke free. Had that been what he wanted? Ryan shook her head before taking his hand and leading him over to the couch.
Of course, once they sat down, she didn't know if she wanted to talk about everything he'd been able to help her escape from for a few minutes. "So what were you doing when I came in?" She asked, pretty much out of the blue. She had almost forgotten that he had been preoccupied with something when she had walked in. He probably did not want to hear her story about how she felt like she couldn't help everyone around her through the pain they were dealing with, and how she'd been some of the cause of that pain. It sounded stupid in her mind now anyway; Lis and Ree, they, like herself, did not ask or want for these things to happen to them. Instead, it made more sense to think of something else to talk about, "I might actually start crying again if I talk about it right now." Ryan didn't want to cry in front of him, especially when he'd helped her feel better. She'd been a mess when she came in, and was starting to feel normal. Maybe after focusing on something that wasn't her problems she could explain a bit calmer? That's what she was hoping for, at least.
You've never seen a fight like this before
I'll take you down and leave you wanting more
You've crossed a line that I cannot ignore
You've never seen a fight like this before

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Castor Greengrass
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"I can handle a bit of annoyance." It was better than whatever emotions she had been displaying earlier. Cast decided there was nothing wrong, at all, with her being so focused on him she had forgotten her other worries. He was OK with anything that she felt in regards to him. Most things. As long as she was thinking about him. What a weird thing to realize. What right did he have to be so possessive of a girl he'd known for a few weeks?

It was good to hear her laughing. Especially as she half ass struggled to win her way free of his grip. Or maybe she was actually trying to get away and was super weak, he didn't know. Cast might have laughed too, although her kiss was rather sobering. The Ravenclaw released her, shocked by the way she had just rattled his heart. "That was cheating, I'm pretty sure." Cast managed, as she pulled him towards a couch.

Oh, they were talking about him. Cast jolted, looking around for his bag before summoning it to him. He'd forgotten, momentarily, but now it was all back... and any sorting he had managed to get done was probably demolished. She'd been saying something else, but he hadn't heard. He stared at the bag, conflicted. "My mother," He stopped, it was very unlike him to show ineloquence, "My birth mother has been writing me letters fairly frequently from her cell in Azkaban." How did they get here from giggling at each other? He'd much rather go back to that. "I don't know why, but I got sent a huge bundle of them." He opened the bag to show her. "I was just trying to sort them chronologically. They aren't dated or anything." Cast shrugged like it wasn't any big deal.
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Ryan Elliot
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If you don't stand for something, you might fall for anything.

"Oh? That's probably a good thing." She assumed. Ryan needed someone to have patience with her, especially when she felt like a crazy person. God knew she had none with herself. However, she wondered if he meant he couldn't handle another fit? Well, unless it resulted in her throwing him against a wall.
She laughed at his accusation, "You should have kept your wits about you better. So silly, that a kiss alone could set me free, don't you think?" She stuck her tongue out at him again. She actually liked that it could distract him so easily, or rather, that she could distract him so easily. She contributed her actual struggle to the earlier outburst in part, and also, of course, because she really liked being in his arms. Telling him that right now would probably be a bad idea, though.
Cast hadn't been prepared to talk about what he'd been doing. He immediately searched the room for something, Ryan looked over her shoulder to see if she'd missed anyone in the room. He summoned a bag to him. She listened to him speak, her own eyes were on the bag. His birth mother, the murderer; sent away for life, along with her accomplice husband, had been writing to her son. Ryan normally would have pitied the woman; though not yet a mother herself, the Ravenclaw understood a tie of blood, of family, to some extent. Mothers were strange creatures, and generally did love their children deeply, in ways Ry knew she couldn't grasp at all. However, Ryan did not want to sympathize with a killer. Instead, she stared at the bag, a mixture of fear and curiosity building within her. "How?" was her only question. Of course, there were a lot of hows. How did the woman remain cognitive enough to write about her son? To him, even? How had she been allowed such a thing? How had she hidden it from the aurors? She stared at the bundle within the bag, for a long moment as she thought about these things, then looked around the room again, suddenly alert to her surroundings for the first time since she walked into the room.
"There's no way this could have happened." Her voice was lowered, even though they were obviously alone. There were too many tings that didn't make sense. The woman should have been placed with enough supervision that writing would have been close to impossible.
The thing that concerned Ryan most was that he'd received these letters. Letters that never should have been written, and should not be in his possession now. How had they managed to be sent to him? Who sent them and why? Wasn't there laws of separation from him? The only thing that he possessed from either of his parents, until tonight, had been that book. The woman and her husband were dangerous, dangerous in the world, and a danger to him. She tried to think of all the ways they could have gotten to him, but it started to make her head hurt. There was just no way.
He'd been trying to organize them? Her gaze flitted back up to him, this boy that hadn't asked to be born from two murdering lunatics. This boy that her heart suddenly began aching for. Those blood ties. Ryan tried now, to put herself in his shoes. Trying to imagine never knowing her real parents, feeling lost. Casteless. Shit. This outcast... one more person that she wanted to help but had no clue how to. In fact, she was more likely to make things worse. Don't cry, don't cry. She looked away from him, closed her eyes, and took a deep breath, swallowing back the tears. She couldn't imagine being in the pain he was in. It was why she heard that bitter tone in his voice whenever he spoke about it. He'd been trying to find out when each letter was written. Her hands balled into fists in her lap. "Can I help?" She asked, voice wavering, hinting at her sadness for him, and the tears that were ready to flow again. She wanted to be close to him again, but suddenly felt like it would be overreaching some invisible boundary? She really had no clue how to handle this.
She probably should have just gone to bed. She felt so useless.
Edited by Ryan Elliot, May 16 2014, 07:08:27 PM.
You've never seen a fight like this before
I'll take you down and leave you wanting more
You've crossed a line that I cannot ignore
You've never seen a fight like this before

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Jennnnnnnn!
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Castor Greengrass
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Was it? Cast considered her. She had to have any number of people she could talk to about her problems, even just in her family alone. Yet here she was declaring that it would be good if he could deal with her. It didn't really make sense. Of course, he had never trusted his problems with anyone else. Nor did he know what it would be like to share them with family. So it was reasonable for him to not understand. He simply had to be content in the knowledge that she considered it a good thing.

It took a lot of self restraint to not pull her back in as she stuck her tongue out at him. Who did she think he was? He'd show her silly. Although, there was something about the confidence she exuded now, and the fact that they really needed to not continue kissing, that stalled him. It was good to see. Such an abrupt and apparent change... because of his intervention. A strange reward, but no less gratifying.

Ryan seemed to grow upset once more and he regretted saying anything at all. Of course it would be frightening. So you got letters from your mother that murdered people. That wasn't something you could casually throw into a conversation. Cast made a face, because he didn't really understand what she was asking. How... what? No way it could have happened. He felt a bitterness rise up his throat. Castor hadn't really given it any consideration. At all, really. She was focusing on all the wrong parts. Only she wasn't. He had been the one focused on the wrong things. It should be alarming, that he suddenly get correspondence from his parents. He stared at the bag bitterly. The words held within now viewed with a sinister tinge. Beloved son. He didn't know what he had been thinking, and it angered him to realize that he hadn't been. Cast had been overwhelmed by the thought of a woman who cared for him so deeply she was willing to risk who knew what to write letters that she had no reason to believe would ever reach him.

In all likelihood they were probably just insane ramblings. A crazy woman, locked away, with nothing else to fixate on but what sort of life her son might be living. Fuck.

Cast hadn't meant to upset her, but there was nothing he could do about it now. "No, it's fine. It really isn't important." It would be crazy of him to admit that it was. Crazy to feel any attachment to these people whatsoever. He'd be locked away too. Three Greengrasses, all stark mad. "They're just letters." He looked her way, almost in a bemused manner. The Ravenclaw hadn't taken the time to actually look at her costume since she'd come in. He imagined it would have been quite stunning towards the start of the evening. Though there was a certain beauty in her empathy. He wasn't the sort of person to hold smudged makeup against someone. "I regret not going down to the feast before everything that happened." Maybe seeing her as she had intended herself to be seen would have helped change his view on the Holiday. Although the memory of her laughing and teasing him was far more likely to take root and be remembered. He didn't want to forget that. Not ever.
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Ryan Elliot
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If you don't stand for something, you might fall for anything.

The more Castor reacted to her, the more completely stupid she felt. She could have kept her mouth shut, but nope. Of course not.
The girl had no clue what to even say to him. He was being nonchalant about this thing that certainly wasn't a light matter, no matter how you looked at it. The thing was, it had to bother him. She'd said something terribly wrong, mostly in saying almost nothing. This was his family, people he didn't know, but probably wanted to, and she'd just brought in the reality of the situation, dragging everything down. Of course, just one more thing she'd made worse tonight.
Ryan sighed at his comment, shook her head. It was frustrating that Cast had brushed the little bit of concern she'd shown through her fear aside. For what? Hopefully not for her sake, like that would make her feel any better. The girl knew that if she looked at him right now, she'd probably forgive him right away. Ryan was slowly learning how to not remain bitter about things. It kind of got you no where in life, but for now, she just wanted to be a little angry at him. Which was weird, because she'd just kissed him, been scared for him, and felt bad for him in the last ten minutes. She sat there quietly for a long time, fists still in place. She quickly grew angry with herself when a tear managed to fall, landing on the skirt of her costume. She had no right to feel anything towards him at all. They weren't anything more than.. what? She didn't even know? More than friends, not quite..
She wanted to help, but maybe he just wasn't ready for someone to be so concerned. The fact that he had even told her about it showed that he trusted her, which she'd proven to her best friend more than once, Ryan wasn't someone that could be trusted with secrets. At all. It probably was not the best idea to talk to him about anything that happened at the feast. She would have liked him there, but it wasn't like they would have been able to interact so freely. It would have been kind of pointless. Plus, everything that she'd gone through seemed so minor in comparison, now. She did her best to steady her voice, "I should.. probably go to bed." Dammit another tear. She could feel herself shaking a little bit, too. Maybe she was overreacting to everything, just being stupid about the whole night. If she got some rest, she could think clearer in the morning, maybe? Hopefully. She did feel bad that she was kind of suggesting just leaving him there, but if he wanted to continue what he was doing and didn't want her help, what was she supposed to do? Stick around and keep him from.. whatever? "I'm sorry if I said anything... that hurt you." She shrugged, "Seems to be a running theme with me lately. Maybe there's hope for tomorrow though?" She offered him a small smile, rigid and outweighed by all the negative emotions she was feeling. Her eyes did meet his, she could really just stay here, right? He wasn't trying to get her to leave, she was trying to find a way out so she could be alone, but what was good about being alone when you were mad, sad, and scared?
She thought to reach out to him, take his hand or something, but she was still shaky. The girl stood up, thinking she'd truly made the decision that was best for both of them, "Probably just better." She shrugged, but looked at him for a moment. There were definitely more fucking tears coming, and he didn't need to be exposed to it. He had enough happening, and had already done enough to help her. She quietly leaned in, kissed him on the cheek, "I will see you in the morning." The girl whispered the promise to him, another weak smile was given. "I should be doing better, then." Trained to be hopeful, knowing she'd feel better faster if she kept her hopes up and could clear her head. Being with him was nice in one respect, but she really couldn't think properly when he was around. She was probably the most pathetic looking thing in the world to him. Also, probably the most confusing human being he'd ever met. Maybe she was just crazy. That would make a ton of sense, wouldn't it? She straightened up, and began to walk toward the stairs- a small part of her stupidly hoping that he'd get up and stop her, the rest knowing he had no reason to.
Edited by Ryan Elliot, May 17 2014, 11:44:21 PM.
You've never seen a fight like this before
I'll take you down and leave you wanting more
You've crossed a line that I cannot ignore
You've never seen a fight like this before

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Jennnnnnnn!
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Castor Greengrass
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Of course, it seemed only natural. Castor had not meant to upset her by brushing aside her concern, or by not allowing her to help in the only way she could likely think of. It wasn't anything against her, but more his own confusion in regards to the matter that prompted his nonchalance. Cast wasn't sure how he felt, and he didn't want people making assumptions about it either. An eyebrow rose her way, though it was promptly lowered as he realized the extent to which she was actually upset. A part of him realized that this was the reason she had been upset earlier, too. Unwittingly, they'd managed to stumble upon a shitty sort of reminder. The Ravenclaw couldn't take any of what had just happened back. He did feel that she was over estimating her importance in regards to a matter that had been causing him strife since birth.

She had kissed his cheek and stood to leave. He didn't know how to stop her or comfort her, this time. If he should, even. She was a mess and his problems would only effect her negatively. His gaze followed her, cheek wet from where she had brushed against it. Cast's jaw was set very tight, because he didn't understand any of it.

"You have to realize that I have two very different opinions of my parents," Castor spoke, positive that she would stop to listen... even if she didn't want to stay down here with him. "There is how the rest of the world views them; how I should view them, probably... and this notion about how I wish they were." What was he even talking about? "It's complicated and how I feel in regards to them really has nothing to do with..." What? "You." It wasn't really intended in a harsh manner at all. Even without what she had said, he would have gotten to that point himself. Past experiences had taught him that much. He had mentioned to her, in the past, his desire to simply throw his one keepsake into the fire.

He had stood too. There was no reason to stay down here if she was leaving. Cast could figure out what to do with his letters later. Tomorrow, maybe. "I would suggest talking with the people you think you've upset, it'll do you a lot more good than beating yourself up over whatever happened." Moving closer to her might not have been the best idea. He probably wasn't helping at all. What could he possibly know? A boy who tried only to distance himself from people? Frankly, it might have been this distance that allowed him to look at situations so objectively. Cast didn't know if that would be comforting at all. He paused before walking past her and towards his own dorm, just to see if she had more to say.
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Ryan Elliot
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If you don't stand for something, you might fall for anything.

Cast began to speak. Ryan stopped walking to listen to him, but didn't turn back to face him. That would be bad. One hand reached in front of her, latching onto the other arm. She nodded, almost impressed with herself, that she was able to hold back the tears. He was right. She had nothing to do with the situation, and it was unfair for her to push herself into it. They barely knew one another, and none of the situation was her business, he had to figure it out on his own. It just seemed terribly alone.. of course, that's what he was kind of used to, probably.
He continued. She heard his voice get closer to her as he gave her some advice..? What he said was probably something she would have concluded on her own before leaving the dorm in the morning. Ryan normally was a sensible person, she just wasn't right now. Or since he'd met her. He had walked in front of her, stopped. Was he waiting for her to say something? "Thank you." She said, and meant it. Him being close again made her brain feel kind of fuzzy?
Without thinking much, she reached for his hand, taking a step up to be next to him at first, but then stepping around him. She offered her other hand towards his, and looked up to him. "It feels nice to be close to you? I kind of don't want to not be near you right now. If that's ok." The girl shrugged at the last thing she said, not entirely sure why she was telling him this. She'd grown more and more fond of him, and now she actually free to express that any way she pleased, if he was alright with it, "I mean, you don't have to stay here with me.. it's um..." What? Her face grew pink, she looked away. Obviously, he wanted some kind of distance from her, and here she was kind of throwing herself back at him, "I kind of feel selfish about it." The honesty... but she didn't want to let go of his hand. If he wanted to, she'd relent, but she really wanted to believe he wouldn't? What would they even talk about or do if they stayed down here? "I am sorry I'm such a mess." She laughed, "You probably think I'm out of my mind." Yep. That's a good path to go down. Like he needed another crazy person in his life, "Maybe you'd be better off getting out while you still can." Was she seriously doing this right now?
Edited by Ryan Elliot, May 18 2014, 08:04:04 PM.
You've never seen a fight like this before
I'll take you down and leave you wanting more
You've crossed a line that I cannot ignore
You've never seen a fight like this before

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Jennnnnnnn!
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Castor Greengrass
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Ryan thanked him, but he didn't really know for what. Cast didn't dwell on it much as she grabbed his hand, suitably stalling him from continuing up the stairs. She was in front of him now, both hands in hers. He decided that she was probably the most confusing girl that had ever existed. Many men had attempted to depict their mass confusion in regards to the opposite gender, but everything had fallen short of what he was feeling right then. He had no problems with her remaining near him. She seemed to ramble quite a bit when she was upset. It had confused him at first, before he'd understood what she was trying to say. Then it had been sort of cute... and he wasn't sure what to do with himself. Kissing her was bad, and it would remain bad for the rest of the night. Things were weird enough without all of that piled on top, probably. That was basically the only thing he was certain of. Which sucked for undisclosed reasons.

Cast claimed one of his hands back, but only to wrap it around her. I kind of don't want to not be near you right now. She'd said. If that's ok. It was a strange to him as her reasoning that he be the one to get out. Like he was somehow more sane in his general isolation from others. His lips pressed briefly against her forehead. Surely that would be alright? He didn't really think about it all that much. "You shouldn't have walked away, then." He pointed out, playfully, words muffled against her hair. The Ravenclaw didn't really know what they would do if they stayed down here. Maybe just sitting in silence would be alright. Talking about things, right now, didn't seem to be resolving anything. Or had it been his unwillingness to talk? She had changed her mind after he'd opened up... however slightly. "I can stay," Wanted to, even. "If you think it would help." Watching her leave to go cry in her dorm had sort of sucked? Hopefully that would be answer enough to her suggestion that he get out. Although he was curious about the 'while you still can' part of the sentence. As in, how she intended to force him to stick around if he didn't want to.

They could pass out on a couch, maybe. Not like that could get read into.
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Ryan Elliot
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If you don't stand for something, you might fall for anything.

Ryan was unsure of her want to kiss Cast again, as he brought her in close. Sure, it felt like a good idea, but something was telling her it really wasn't. She did something that was normally pretty stupid, let him decide. In this case though, he did something she didn't expect, kissed her forehead. Was it stupid for her to read into this too much?
Her body relaxed, her free hand went up around his neck. Her eyes closed as he spoke. She smiled a little, hearing his tone. She was definitely confusing for him. At least she wasn't alone. Castor then said he was willing to stay with her. The tears had kind of gone away? She nodded, but had no actual idea what they would be doing. He was being so kind to her, and she kind of felt like she didn't deserve it? Ryan looked up to him for a moment, realizing that he was telling her he didn't want out by staying with her. The arm came back down, the other hand led him back over to the couch. Immediately, her mind thought it would be best for her to pick a chair or something separate from him. They'd still be together, right? But that really wasn't what she wanted. She let him get comfortable and then leaned up against him. She really had nothing to say? She was more thankful for him right now than she'd ever been for anyone outside of her family except for maybe Ree. Maybe? Right now her head was still pretty fuzzy, "Thank you." She mumbled again. She could hear his heartbeat, his breathing. It was relaxing. She was soon drifting off to sleep, feeling kind of safe with him there.
You've never seen a fight like this before
I'll take you down and leave you wanting more
You've crossed a line that I cannot ignore
You've never seen a fight like this before

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Jennnnnnnn!
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