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|Revenant; What happened after the Star Forge?|
|Tweet Topic Started: Jun 28 2010, 04:53 AM (1,003 Views)|
|Jedi Striker||Jun 28 2010, 04:53 AM Post #1|
|Good news, y'all!! I found the fan fiction website, and found the story I liked of what happened to Revan and the crew after the Star Forge was destroyed. There are a lot of edits I have to make, but I'll upload a chapter once I've finished! Unfortunately, the author only uploaded seven chapters, but I will try and contact hom and see if he'll work with me to finish the story. Until then, enjoy!!|
Emotion, yet peace. |
Ignorance, yet knowledge.
Passion, yet serenity.
Chaos, yet harmony.
Death, yet the Force.
|Tpiom||Jul 1 2010, 04:20 PM Post #2|
I don't really like fan fiction, as too many of them suck, but if you like it... I will give it a shot.
|No longer active on this forum.|
|Jedi Striker||Jul 2 2010, 06:02 AM Post #3|
Chapter one is complete!! Hope you all enjoy the work I put into editing this!!
Chapter 1: Open Wounds
Soft wind, full of the scents of salt and iodine, blew up onto the silvery sand of the beach. Even on this nameless planet, now named Lehon by the Republic, beauty was present everywhere for those who seek it. The wind's gentle breeze blows sand grains off the dunes making up the coastline. Behind the dunes, a massive temple stood, decaying and ancient, but it now bustles with activity, music and people. The sounds of a party in full, noisy swing drifted out across the sea; one hell of a celebration. But not all those invited were there.
A figure stood in the middle of the beach, staring into the distance, as a handful of sand trickled from a clenched hand. The wind from the sea picked at its robes, but that too was ignored. Behind the figure, a gentle clicking and quiet tattle of grains falling onto a hard surface was heard, but the gaze never wavered from the horizon. Silence for a few minutes, and then.
“Question: Master, why have you left the victory celebrations?”
“Puzzlement: I do not understand,” rattled the metallic voice. “You have destroyed the Star Forge, killed Malak and brought back Lady Bastila from the dark side. I do not understand why you have isolated yourself this way, master. The other meatbags are annoying, but civil. They all see you as the savior of the Republic. Master, why are you not pleased?”
“Who am I HK?” The figure dropped its hand to its side as the last of the sand trickles from it. “What am I?”
“Question: I do not understand, Master. What is it you are asking of me?”
Turning with a deep sigh, Revan observed the deep red assassin droid standing a few meters from his side. Everything about the robot, from its demeanor to the very force flowing from it, reeked of the dark side... something he had created with his own hands. “A simple question that could very well mean everything…” he turned to look up the beach at the distant crowd of people, "or to some, nothing."
“Statement: I do not understand, Master. You are the Dark Lord Revan. You were redeemed by the Jedi and are now the Jedi Knight Revan.” HK-47 watched as Revan clenched his fists. “Question: Is it your name that bothers you, master?”
Revan barked out a laugh filled with bitter amusement and HK-47 stepped back in surprise. Still laughing, Revan turned back to the beach and the far horizon. “Not as such, no. I'm more concerned with everything else that makes me who I am. I can live with being called Revan.” Glancing behind him for a second, Revan's face clouded over. “It's if others can stand seeing me free and, happy, if that's the right word.”
HK-47’s audio sensors picked up the bitterness in his master’s voice. With a few seconds of processing, his advanced AI routines engaged. A suggestion that further conversation may not be the best option was created. Turning away from the lonely figure on the beach, HK-47 strode quietly back to the party. Some meatbags, especially on occasion his master and creator, needed to be alone. But he stood guard on the other side of the dune, hidden from Revan.
One could never know when a Sith assassin may spring up from under the beach, a lightsaber clutched in his teeth. Secretly, HK hoped it would happen, for he'd done far too little killing and it was getting on his nerves.
Mission looked up from the large drink clasped in her hand and wrinkled her forehead as her eyes passed across the party guests. For an open air do, the Republic sure knew how to throw one hell of a party. She looked over to where Canderous and Zaalbar were playing a bastardized version of Tarisian ale arm wrestling. She grinned. Both were up to eight pints each and, despite some slight slurred speech, both seemed to be going the distance.
Canderous was grunting and his, still impressive, muscles were bulging along the whole of his arm. Zaalbar sat opposite, his vast hand-paw wrapped around Canderous's hand, and Mission could see the muscles also under there bunched tightly. She sniggered and watched as each groaned and, in Zaalbar's case, growled as they were trying to find purchase. One a Wookie, the other Mandalorian, both – however – were men and so... so... predictable.
Sipping her drink, she cast her eyes across the platform again. Carth sat at another table, a bottle of liquor opened and a quarter consumed in the middle, engaged in conversation with his son, Dustil. Mission had decided not to get involved with that little problem. Carth had entered into the discussion with “that” look, one she knew very well indeed.
It was tragic: his lost son, found! Yet, to Carth's horror, raised as a Sith. No, she didn't want to even contemplate what words were being passed across that surface, no matter how civil it appeared to be from her vantage.
She watched as Carth motioned with his hand over some point only to have it gently yet firmly pressed to the table by his son, who then muttered something in return. Carth looked unhappy and shook his head, Dustil frowned and the talk began again. Yes, definitely something she didn't want to get involved with.
Sipping her drink again she watched Jolee laughing and chatting with Master Vrook at the buffet table. To his great surprise, Jolee had been asked back to the Jedi Order to become a Jedi Master. Vrook, obviously wanting to understand more about Jolee's opinions of the Council and objections to the Jedi Code, had come over as soon as the party had begun and engaged the old man in conversation. Indeed, as she watched the two old men quietly spar over the various parts of the Code, dining forks replacing sabers and grins playing across both their lips, she wondered if either had ever had as much fun.
Getting up from the chair she'd slumped into with her, now half full, drink, Mission wandered across to lean against the parapet. The booze was going to her head and she didn't want anyone telling her to go to bed like some “kid”.
Fresh air slithered across the stone and Mission’s eyes drifted softly along the wall until they fixed on a figure crouched softly in a shadowy corner. Her eyes focused slowly on the corner and she started as two feral yellow eyes shone from the shadows with amusement.
The shape smoothly stood up into the form of a muscular and tall young woman and stepped slightly into the light. As it did so, Mission gently walked along the wall, one hand gripping the stone for support, and winded her slightly wobbly way towards the Cathar.
Juhani raised her eyebrows at Mission’s approach and shifted her position slightly so that she could offer the young Twi'lek a supporting arm. “I see the celebrations are getting too much for you,” she purred gently, a smile playing across her face revealing a hint of the feral incisors underneath.
Mission snorted indignantly and waving her drink around attempted to stand upright. “Don't be daft, Ju. I'm fine,” ahe managed, stumbling slightly until Juhani's steadying hand snuck under her own and held her upright. “I came over to talk to you, y'know. I was quite happy sitting over there.” Again, the drink sloshed slightly over the rim. “But I came over cause you seemed to be away from everything else. You okay?”
Juhani smiled at Mission's bleary expression of concern. Steadying the Twi'lek, she reached out with the Force and yanked a soft chair over from a table. Gently, she pushed Mission into the chair and perched gently on the side. “Sit.”
Mission burped and then sighed, “Thanks... but stop avoiding the question, Ju. C'mon.. spill!”
Juhani sighed and glanced with mild distaste towards the huge group in the middle of the room. “We Cathar do not… associate well with large groups such as this. It makes me uncomfortable to be prodded, poked, and slapped on the back... too much like my time in the slaver pits, I'm afraid. I prefer quiet contemplation over our victory, and our possible future losses.”
Mission frowned as Juhani's unhappy tone slipped past the blurring effect of the alcohol. “What losses? Revan's still here and managed to beat the hell out of their so called ‘Lord of the Sith’ and he managed to bring Bastila back, y'know. So what losses are you talking about?"
The Cathar sighed and kneeled gently in front of Mission. Picking up the drink set in Mission’s lap, Juhani placed it on the floor. "My dear friend, have you looked, seriously, around at the party?" Mission frowned and shook her head. "Then I suggest you look once more. It does not take someone with my skills to see we have lost a great deal in this battle, most of it unseen.”
Nodding, Mission looked once more around the courtyard. A large number of guests were dancing to music from a band of Republic soldiers while others drank and engaged in quiet discussion at the bar. She could see a group of the alien keepers standing chatting to a Republic diplomat with the help of another Jedi. Puzzled, she turned back to take in the whole crowd and suddenly felt a cold chill pass over her. Turing back to face Juhani she felt the joy that had bubbled inside her slowly shrink.
“Where're Bastila and Revan?” she managed, feeling slightly sick. “This is all for them so where are they?”
Juhani stood once more and gracefully slid herself back onto the arm of the chair. “I know where Revan is, and despite that I am concerned over his state of mind.” She paused wondering how much to burden Mission's youth with. The fact that she had seen as much as Juhani had on this quest made her unburden herself. “Revan is... withdrawn. Did you see him at the award ceremony, fawning and nodding when they gave us the medals? I could feel his happiness at the time, but now I'm not so sure it wasn't an act, for the Council as well as us.”
Mission watched the Cathar's face slip into a troubled frown. She looked around at the party and shrugged. “I don't understand if he is. He should be happy, if not overjoyed. He managed to defeat Mala, managed to turn Bastila from the dark side and annihilated the Star Forge.” She grinned and stifled a snigger. “Besides, from the way those two snuck off when they thought I wasn't looking means the Hawk’ll need a nursery."
Juhani sighed and shook her head. “Revan is… troubled, Mission. I cannot help him but I feel it all the same. He left as soon as the awards were finished and wandered off. I am concerned, for he has doubts about a great many things.” She paused and looked around for a second before continuing in a hush. “Remember that Revan had to kill Malak, a friend and trusted apprentice while he was the Dark Lord. He told Carth and Bastila that he could not turn him back."
Mission goggled at her. “How'd you know Revan tried to turn him away from the dark side?” She paused for a second and another thought entered her mind. “For that matter why'd he bother? Surely he knew Malak would never have turned away. I mean he blew up my…OUR home planet, for Taris's sake!”
Juhani felt Mission's anger burst out of her and a small part of her agreed with all its heart. ‘I am a Jedi,’[/I/] she thought inwardly, slowly. ‘There is no emotion, there is peace.’
“I understand your anger, Mission. However, you must consider how Revan felt.” Mission began to splutter in protest, but Juhani silenced her with a gentle look. "Revan was much more in tune with the dark side than Malak ever was. It was Revan's fault that Malak turned to the dark side, his fault that the Star Forge was found and restarted, all the deaths of Jedi and Republic soldiers who have fallen are on his shoulders.” She paused and sighed, shifting on the chair arm. “More importantly he feels it his burden that Bastila was captured, tortured and turned to the dark side.”
“But she was brought back! He brought her back, he loved her and she felt it.” Mission felt torn between anger and sadness. “Okay, so he created Malak for sure, but Bastila was NOT his fault. He loves her, anyone could see that.”
Juhani nodded. “I agree that he loves her still. Loves her with all his heart. But, however hard he tries he cannot feel anything but responsible for her downfall.” Juhani sighed. “Even if he did save her, redeemed her, his guilt remains, however unfounded.”
Mission sat quietly in her chair, all thought of partying gone from her mind. “Bastila could...”
“Bastila is also part of the problem. She has become insular and repressed. Did you see her at the award ceremony?” Mission nodded. “Then you remember that she was quiet then and also stood away from Revan as far as possible.”
“But why? She loves him too. She told us his love saved her from the dark in her heart. I remember that.”
“She returned to the Ebon Hawk after the ceremony and has not returned since. But that does not concern me as much as what I sensed from her as she boarded the ship." Juhani got up form the chair and paced backwards and forwards. “I felt her guilt, Mission, and it almost overwhelmed her at the ceremony and it's been getting darker since. Even now,” she waved her hand at the Hawk in the distance. “I can feel her despair flow from that ship even now. It hangs over the Ebon Hawk like a dark shroud.”
Mission swallowed. “Y, you don't mean she's...”
Juhani shook her head. “No! No... This is a different kind of darkness, the kind that comes from despair.” Juhani stopped pacing and looked at Mission. “All I feel is her guilt. Overwhelming guilt that she fel, andl that she tried to kill Revan even as he tried to save her. As if that was not enough, Bastila also feels she failed at the duty the Council placed her with. However the most important thing to her, is that she feels she betrayed Revan's love.”
Mission felt tears sting the corners of her eyes. “S’not fair. Can't they have just one break in this life? Okay, so Rev was the most evil guy, like... ever. But he’s changed! An’... and so Bastila fell, so what! She’s his reason for go’n on, like Big Z was for me.” Mission looked up at the Cathar angrily. “Can't the universe give em just one, one damn break?”
Juhani watched Mission’s struggle to suppress her anger, unused to the drink fuelling it. Juhani laid a supporting hand onto her arm. “I have high hope, Mission, hope that they will eventually be together once more. We just need to give them time.”
“I know.” Mission nodded and wiped the tears angrily away. “It just seems so unfair for both of them. Revan especially. I thought Bastila became kinda his entire reason for fighting the dark side.”
Juhani sighed and, standing up, smiled at Mission’s young face. “Do not be too sad, Mission. We did win a great victory for the light, and we all came back alive. I am certain that things will turn out for the best. Now, you seem to enjoy these celebrations more than I do. I suggest you take this chance while everyone is heralding you as a hero and seems to have forgotten your age to get even more drunk.'”
Mission blushed as Juhani glanced at the glass of alcohol in her hand and a smile curled round the Cathar’s soft features. The young Twi'lek coughed and shuffled her feet. “Anymore... advice?”
“Find someone you like and dance as much as you want.”
Mission smiled slightly and slowly staggered to her feet. The booze did seem to be having a slight affect after all. But she could handle it. “Is this advice from a noble Jedi or a Cathar pal?”
She looked round and saw that Zaalbar and Canderous were now deep into a drinking contest. As she gazed at her furry friend, she missed the sparkle of amusement in Juhani's eyes. As Zaalbar tossed back another pint of ale, Mission shook her head and turned back to Juhani. “I suppose I can. It’s the first time anyone's really treated me like an adult, y'know. I could do with another drink I suppose. Y’ want to join me, Ju?”
Juhani shook her head. “No thank you, Mission. I think I may just go and find a quiet spot to meditate in.” She smiled at Mission;s puzzled expression. “It's one of our, how did you say once? Ah... ‘our odd Jedi ways’.”
Mission paused for a second. Juhani seemed so lonely, yet wanted to be alone. ‘Must be a Cathar thing.’ She shrugged and then grinned at her.
"Well, your choice I suppose. See you back at the Hawk later, yeah?"
Juhani nodded and gracefully walked across the sunny courtyard while Mission watched her go. Only after the Cathar had vanished into the foliage did she turn back to the party.
It was dark in the Ebon Hawk. Upon landing, Carth had shut down all systems to maintain power, and yet that was not the reason for the sheer black of the ships internal space. The internal lighting system flickered feebly as power trickled into them at thirty percent of normal.
The shadowy interior that this created ran the length of the ship and was its darkest in the crew bunks. There, the light had been extinguished totally. The only sound on board was the hum of the engine idly ticking over, the environmental plant and a few computer confirmation chimes. All, except for the gentle weeping that echoed around the Hawk’s internal corridors.
The sobs slipped gently from the dark room, each one filled with more loss and guilt than many people would feel in a lifetime. Their source came from the young woman lying in a fetal position on the bunk's cover. Her face was covered in the tears that ran down her cheeks in a steady stream.
Bastila hugged her knees as she had once as a child. Her ego shattered from events that even now made her shiver and shake with the disbelief and horror that came of understanding... true darkness. The bleak cold of it burned and gnawed at her soul, as the guilt and pain flooded into and around her.
“You are a fool, Revan!” He had been made to love her the way he had, the way he did.
“Come back to the light, Bastila. I love you.” She’d wanted to, she remembered how the tiny flicker of light, swamped by darkness, had burned even brighter when it heard those words, and fought against the darkness like a raging beast even though it had been so very tiny.
“I could never love anyone so weak as you.” Such a lie, such a weak and petty lie, and she’d known this even as she’d said it. She’d given in to the darkness that lived in her, and lived in everyone as she’d come to realize. Revan had been given a second chance. Without training, he had shown that it was down to the person rather than anything mentors could say or teach that defined who one was. Weak? He’d been stronger than she'd been, even the very first day he’d “met” her on Taris.
“Then strike me down. I will not fight you anymore.” A sob escaped her at the memory of him standing there, saber extinguished and a face filled with sorrow. Another sob wracked her body as she remembered the speed at which she'd lashed out with her own dark red saber blade, burning a hole in his flesh, and then only to have it deflected by Revan’s own lightning fast deflection. She’d seen the tip still extending from the hilt as he deflected hers and remembered the suffering in his eyes as battle rejoined.
Sighing, she slid up to slump against the bulkhead, her head in her hands. She remembered the flow of the dark side in her, filling her every pore with its insidious power. She’d felt more power flow in her than ever before, and yet he’d been there. Yes, he’d been there and stood before her; confident and calm as she'd lashed out again and again trying to break through his defenses.
“Why can't I defeat you?” Another foolish question, she'd known even then. Exhausted from the battle, saber burns slashing her arms and wrists, so carefully avoiding anything mortally wounding, she’d known.
“Take my strength, Bastila. Use our link.” A moan of guilt escaped her lips as the memory overwhelmed her. The strength, not just of the Force, but also his sheer love for her, had swamped the blackness in a vast tide. It had beaten it back in her until she’d been able to fight it herself, adding her own meager strength to his until only a tiny flicker of the darkness had remained. Even then, it had been a struggle to surrender to the light once more. With Revan standing there, saber once more extinguished, open to attack and playing such a dangerous game with a Dark Jedi. She’d remembered the urging from what dark had remained to strike him down, to prove her worth to Malak. It had been so, so close until he'd said one final thing.
“I believe in you, Bastila... because I love you!” Such sweet simplicity. Such power behind those words. She’d wanted them, needed to hear them… and as they echoed around and through her, she’d felt the last of the dark’s hold over her vanish.
“For what Its worth I love you too.” She’d meant it and still did. She loved him, who and what he was and had been. Unable to deny it had brought both relief and guilt. Such relief as who she once had been returned to her, and she’d cast aside the mantle of evil for her own belief in the light side. Such guilt, as his love for her and her love for him defied the very core beliefs of being a Jedi.
Bastila rose from the bunk and slumped down the corridor to the Hawk’s cockpit. She fell gently into the pilot’s seat and gazed out of the plastisteel window. The party on the temple’s footsteps had really got into its swing and she felt the exuberance of the crowd flow through the Force as they danced, drank, and enjoyed themselves. She closed her eyes and, even in her depression, smiled slightly at the feelings of exuberant happiness flowing from Mission, Zaalbar, and Canderous as they relaxed. A gentle area of calm Force power slipped away from the party and Bastila recognized it as Juhani. She sensed the inner troubled aura it gave off and knew Juhani was looking towards the Hawk, towards her, until eventually the Cathar slipped away.
Sighing, she turned her thoughts inwardly. She’d become a Jedi once again, yet the way she’d been redeemed spat on the first principle of being an actual Jedi. Love: powerful, untamed and dangerous. Not of the dark side, but an emotion of incredible power. Did her love for Revan betray her to the dark side? She closed her eyes and felt a bubble of guilt roll in her gut. Everything she’d been taught at the academy warned of such emotion, the danger that they brought her. Yet, she’d been unable to stop herself from falling for him. The knowledge of who and what, he had been should have made it easy for her. But, for all the meditation she’d done, for all the preparation at night to try and cope with being so close to him, it had failed to stop the love she'd felt growing inside.
Their kiss, their first kiss; stolen in the rear of the Hawk had given her such longing for his touch, being close to him. Desire had been there, yes, but just a need for him next to her had filled her body and soul. She’d fought it, desperately, madly, until she’d been unable to breathe and had stolen what little time with him she felt she could give from the mission.
Her fall to the dark side had begun just after the enemy had captured them. Admiral Saul Karath had tortured her specifically: he knew she was Revan’s weak point as Saul had tried his hardest to yank information from him. The pain of the torture field had been agonizing, but she’d been able to cope until merciful unconsciousness had taken her. Her last memory, alongside the faint reminder of rippling pain, had been the agony ripping Revan in two as he’d watched her jerk and toss in the pain-field.
The escape had been furious with no time to think, but that was no excuse for her foolhardy attitude. Why had she sacrificed herself so stupidly to save Revan? She should have known that Malak would use her to make things worse for him and he'd been breaking free of the force stasis even as she'd moved to attack.
Had it been for the mission? Her guilt over what they'd done to him? No, it had been much simpler than that. Malak had been about to strike Revan down, or so she’d thought, and she’d blindly leapt to his defense, so frightened of losing him. No thought, no logical reason, just pure emotion. It could only have been this that had allowed Malak to work out how deep her feelings went for Revan. His triumphant eyes had been terrible to behold, as she lay injured at his feet, blood trickling from her mouth onto the cold metal floor. Worse had been the last glimpse of Revan she’d had, his face filled with anguish and fear for her life as the blast doors had begun to swing close. She’d watched his face and felt a lingering touch of the link between them.
‘I love you, Bastila. Hold on for my sake, I beg you,’ he'd whispered in her mind even as Carth had dragged him backwards down the corridor and the door had slammed shut.
The terrible knowledge of herself and Revan had given him a powerful pressure point to use against her:
They’d dragged her to the temple beneath the Star Forge, her arms manacled to her sides, a neural disrupting device strapped to her head to prevent focus. They’d tied her to the slab in the temple and, as a Sith medic had tended her wounds, no anesthetic to dull the pain of each searing burn, Malak had been preparing his various methods of physical torture in front of her.
She’d been tied there for five days, cramp and the cold wearing her Jedi meditation raw as she’d tried to concentrate and shore up her ailing resistance. Malak had taken extreme delight in handing out physical torture. Most she had managed to block out, but some, some had been even more terrible than Saul’s torture fields. Her hands shook as she ran her fingers over a set of faint marks on the skin of her stomach, almost healed. Malak had needed help for these. A young Sith woman had handed him each implement, watching with fascinated detachment at the use of each one. Tears welled in Bastila’s eyes at the memory of the unbearable agony, when Malak had let her take over completely. He’d watched with obvious enjoyment at her greatly more skilled use of each implement. The woman had used stims to keep her conscious, especially through some of her more inventive and lengthy procedures. She’d been inventive each single day for long, unbearable hours until Bastila had eventually passed out.
Malak's decision to switch to Sith lightning had been just bearable to Bastila after all she’d gone through at the torture woman's hands. She’d steeled her mind and the pain had been reduced, mostly, to a bearable level. Despite all her effort though, Malak's ability to summon it only equaled his sadistic skill at using it.
It had been the fifth day or so when he’d come back to the chamber and the slab she’d been clamped to and had gloated over her vulnerable body. “I see you’re still with us, my dear,” he’d begun, his eyes flashing with delight at her fear. “No heroic Revan to the rescue yet, I see. Maybe he’s just given up trying to find you.”
“No! He will come for me. Damn you, Malak, he will.”
He’d turned away from her then and had laughed sadistically. “If that is the case then why has the Hawk been seen leaving Korriban and heading to a small moon in the Yavin system?” He’d turned back, his eyes flashing with dark amusement. “I remember all the Star Maps, my dear Bastila. But I don't remember one near Yavin though. It is, however, an excellent place to begin if you wish to just disappear.”
“No. Revan, Don't leave me here,” she’d said in a horrified whisper. Quietly, but enough for Malak to realize he’d hit a major nerve.
“Ahhh... So the noble Bastila, she who refuses to feel any desire to discover the dark side for herself, to feel its power, is in love with the redeemed ‘Lord of the Sith’. How very un-Jedi of you, my dear.”
She’d turned away from him at that point, closing her eyes to block out his gloating expression even as she endured his taunting laughter. Once he’d left after another bout of agonizing lightening torture, she’d stretched out her feelings into the bond between her and Revan to find only silence. Of course, now she realized that the temple's dark side had been repressing the bond between them, much as it had during the destruction of Dantooine’s enclave. Then, helpless, bruised and humiliated, it had been a different matter.
It had been one day later. An entire day and night where she’d stretched out her abilities with the force to breaking point trying to sense Revan’s presence. Yearning, as she did, for his reassuring love. To give her any contact with him at all. That had been the day when Malak had finally dragged her over to the dark side.
He had come striding round the corner, to find her exhausted and weak from the draining use of the Force. He’d looked at her with a strange glint in his eye and to her horror actually sat, propped up, next to her on the slab.
“Tell me, Bastila, is it Revan you find attractive, or just the fact that he was once like me, a Lord of the Sith? If it’s power you find attractive, I can give you all you could ever want. I can show you how to get all you could ever want, for the dark side could provide you with all the power you'll ever need. Just surrender yourself to me.”
“I have already told you that I will never turn to the dark side, Malak. Revan will come for me and he will destroy you. I promise you that.” Exhausted and tired from torture, Malak had sensed her defeat in that final statement and decided to change tack once more.
With his back turned away from her, he’d reached up to the metal cover guarding his neck and had released the clasps. It had come away from his face and he’d placed it gently onto a stone slab. “Let me tell you something private, Bastila. I was Revan’s most trusted friend when we were at the academy. I watched his back and saved his life as many times as he did for me during the Mandalorian Wars. Then, of course, he began to fall to the dark side. It was slow at first, more violent saber combat, less mercy to his enemies and less consideration towards the people we were trying to save.” He'd paused and reached a hand up to his face. “In essence, he became the Revan I remember, not the puppet you and the council installed in his brain.”
“Is there a point to all this?” she'd asked, exhaustion hanging on her every word. Bastila leaned back in the pilot chair as the horror swept over her once more. Malak had laughed a little and slowly turned to her prone position. She remembered flinching in disgust as his face, the entire lower portion shorn off by a lightsaber and still raw, like a seeping wound, turned to face her.
“Look what he did to me!” he'd roared at her, his eyes flashing with rage. She’d pulled back as far as the plinth would let her, the cuffs biting into her wrists. “I was his friend, his confidant and the moment I tried to usurp his mantle... he sliced my jaw off without so much as a word of warning!”
He moved closer and she’d felt her shoulders shrink into the plinth. “He did this! He sliced me open, Bastila! That’s the man you saved and that’s the man you have fallen in love with!” He’d pulled back and turned slowly to stare at the ceiling. “I yearned at that point to kill him even more, and when I found out that you and your Jedi team intended to capture him, I knew I had the perfect chance. I used you to keep him busy and struck when his back was turned, watched every laser blast strike that bridge until I rendered his ship a smoking hulk!”
Malak had walked closer and his eyes burned with memory. “Then you… You had the gall to keep him alive!” He pointed at his sliced face. “The man who did this, who tried to deny me my right as leader of the Sith was given a second chance by you and you alone. I hated you for that, but when Calo Nord told me that Revan had forgotten who he was, I had to give you credit. You’ve harmed him in such a way I couldn't have dreamed of and expected him to be grateful!”
Bastila shuddered on the Hawk at the remembered sensation of Malak, his face so close to hers that she could see each individual raw cut, rubbing his cheek against hers. Felt once more the shame, as animal terror and disgust had swamped her, the sensation of dead tissue slithering over her as she lay chained to cold stone. Recalled the moan of terror that had escaped her lips as her Jedi conditioning abandoned her. She’d hated him, with every bone in her body.
All the friends she’d made at the academy that he, and his Dark Jedi lackeys, had cut ruthlessly down. All the good soldiers and innocent civilians he’d wiped out... and finally, after all of his crimes, the erasure of Taris from the galaxy. All of these burned inside her at the sight of his gloating face.
‘Revan, help me! Please!'
“Now, of course,” Malak murmured, his face inches from hers, “I get to hurt him even more, by taking the one thing that he has from all of this and twisting it to my will. I also get my revenge against you, my dear, for keeping him alive. By turning you into everything you hate! You, Bastila, will become my apprentice and you will have the pleasure of killing him if he should stand in my way!”
She’d felt the anger build inside her. Hatred and fear of the man who stood in front of her had welled, uncontrolled, deep inside her and begun to spill into her soul. She’d felt herself beginning to lose control and had desperately fought to regain her balance. Malak, his metal clamp once more attached to his face, had felt her rage begin to overwhelm her, her Force aura rippling with the sheer power of such a dark emotion, and had decided now was the time to play his final card, to use her love against her.
“Revan will never change, Bastila. His loyalties to friends have always been what suit him at the time. I, as much as anyone, know this to be true. He wooed you to keep you from seeing the truth: he doesn't care for you at all. All he saw in you was power and something to have a little fun with.”
She’d turned on the plinth, the metal cuffs biting into her wrists. Her eyes blazing with anger and fury. “No!”
“He left you here at my mercy and he'll never save you from me. You’re mine.”
“NO!” she'd screamed her voice raw with rage.
“I must admit, I can't see why you even thought he might find you attractive. I know his type well. That young Cathar is the type of woman he normally goes for.” He stroked her face and felt the trembling muscles under her skin. “He revels in those that are powerful, Bastila, those that are emotional and full of spirit. Not you, a spoiled Jedi princess, so full of yourself.”
Fighting against the cuffs, she’d snarled and yanked against the plinth holding her away from Malak, her one desire to kill him, to strike him down with her bare hands.
“Mind you, he could be with them now. I wonder if he’s managed to seduce the Cathar by now?”
Unable to free herself, she’d concentrated all of her hate on his laughing visage and her soul burned with the desire to hurt him, rend him limb from limb. She’d felt a sudden exhilaration as a blast of electric force suddenly shot from her body and blew Malak back across the chamber. She’d fallen back exhausted and Malak had risen slowly to his feet, his laughter ringing in her ears.
“Good, Bastila, good. Again, only this time release all of your hate, for your hate makes you powerful!” Malak had pushed into her weak spot once more. “He won’t come because he fears the past, fears me and hates you for your betrayal. You took everything away from him and your love will never be enough for him to forgive you. You acted like a good little puppet of the Jedi Council, someone who played on his emotions to get what you wanted.”
“It wasn't like that!” she'd screamed at him as the guilt filled her. With it had come yet more anger. Anger at him for exposing her deepest fear, anger at herself and anger at the Council. “We had no choice, you had to be stopped!”
[I “And so you ripped his memories away from him and then used your charms to help him get the ones you needed.”
“No, I didn't.”
“Used the fact that he was falling in love with you to taste the dark side inside him, to taste the passion.” Malak felt the rage flow once more and triumphantly finished. “Admit it, Bastila, you used him completely! You ARE no better than me!”
Enraged, the guilt, the anger, and the fear all boiling inside her, she’d screamed at his gloating tone, hitting him again and again as hard as possible with bolt after bolt of lightning, reaching deeper into the dark side of herself. For hours, Malak had just laughed at each blow, knowing full well that she’d been consumed by the dark side inside her and would soon submit to his rule.
The final consuming act, however, had been hers and hers alone. The one thing that had dammed her to the dark path forever… or so she'd thought. Malak had summoned the guards from the adjoining chamber and they had dragged a familiar looking woman in, her hands bound with fiber rope. She’d looked up at Bastila, still chained to the plinth and trembled as her eyes had widened in recognition. Malak had grabbed the young woman’s head and twisted it up.
“Remember her, Bastila? Remember how she helped me torture you? The pain and suffering she caused with a few choice implements?”
“Oh I remember, Malak,” she’d whispered her eyes blazing with cold fire. “Unchain me and watch how well I remember, if you want to lose one of your soldiers.”
Malak had smiled and shrugged. She’d watched in shock as he’d reached out with the Force and unlocked the cuffs holding her to the stone slab. The young woman had moaned in terror as she’d sat up and glared at Malak with hatred. “You free me, Malak? Me, a Jedi who has sworn to destroy you at first opportunity.”
“Oh yes, Bastila. You have felt the dark side’s power course through you when you struck me with your rage. Now, tell me truthfully, Bastila, that the power I offer you is not intriguing. Serve me as my apprentice and I will teach you how to harness the blackness inside yourself!”
She’d paused and felt the last few dregs of her self-control slip away as the dark side whispered seductively to her soul. “I can see your heart, Bastila. Give in to the taint that whispers in your mind... it is the true path to understanding the Force!”
“Very well.” Her voice had been rough, yet cold, calculating and not like her at all. “I... I agree to be your apprentice,” she'd eventually said, feeling the need for power swell in her breast. “But you must swear to teach me all you know!”
Malak had nodded, his eyes blazing with triumph. He'd thrown her her lightsaber and leaned against the wall. She’d looked at the weapon, and ignited it; the familiar yellow glow she had become accustomed since she was a Padawan had now been replaced with a red one. With it's familiar "snap, hiss", she then looked at Malak.
“What do you expect me to do with this?” she’d asked.
“You see the woman in front of you? Remember how she handed me each implement and watched with delight each time I used one?”
She’d nodded and watched the blood drain from the young woman’s face and her body begin to tremble. The feeling was... intoxicating, even as a small part of her screamed in horror at what she was doing.
“Then take your revenge for all she has done. Kill her, maim her; I don’t care, to tell the truth! I can always find more... useful soldiers to replace this one, even with her fascination of torture techniques.”
“Please,” the young woman had murmured, shaking in terror at the glint in Bastila's eyes. “Please don't kill me, Jedi, I... I don't want to die.”
“I didn't want to be tortured; life can be cruel.” She’d smiled sadistically at the woman, and had reveled in the power as the darkness swept over her. “If you want to live, give me one good reason why I should spare you.”
“Y...you're a Jedi. All life is sacred, p... please don't kill me.”
“Not good enough!”
She’d sliced the saber across the woman’s arms and laughed at her cry of agony. The woman had fallen onto the floor moaning in pain at the cauterised wounds slicing her wrists. She’d knelt down close to her ear, the feeling of power over this woman swirling inside her.
“I'll give you another chance to live, try again. Why should I spare you?”
“P... please, show me mercy and I'll do anything you want. Anything… I'll be your servant for the rest of my life, only please... spare me.”
She’d stood up and toyed with the saber, looking down at the pathetic young woman who she’d held the power of life or death over. Eventually, she’d sighed and kneeled down once more.
“Well, I’m flattered that you'd give me your worthless life, but letting you live would be an act of mercy.” The woman's eyes had widened in horror. “As the Sith Code states, there is nothing worse than mercy, is there? So why would I bother with it and with you?”
She’d stood and, even as the woman had cried out to Malak, spun on her heel and stabbed backwards with the red blade. A quick scream had echoed around the chamber but Bastila had listened to the gentle, clothy sounds as the lifeless body slipped onto the stone floor with a gentle thud. It had felt good, good to release all the hate and anger in one massive rush! Malak had nodded with satisfaction at the lifeless body and had motioned for some guards to clean it up. He’d escorted her then to the Star Forge, where she’d felt darker power than she’d believed could exist.
For all her life, the Jedi had worked into her the denial of her emotions. She’d wanted Revan so much, and yet she’d resisted everything she’d felt. It had been at that point, the power of the Forge with her, flowing into her dark soul, when the bond between her and Revan had resurfaced. She’d carefully reached out until she could sense him coming closer to the planet and the temple. Carefully, she’d pulled back until she was certain he couldn’t feel her presence. She’d felt the love pounding in him as he fought to get to her and it had filled her with desire.
“Master, Revan is coming,” she’d told him looking up at her new Dark Lord. “He comes for me and for you.”
Malak had paused and shrugged.
“We will destroy him. More precisely, Bastila, you will destroy him. Meet him on the temple and strike him down! I have no need for an ex-Lord of the Sith, for I have all the power now!”
Looking up at Malak, she felt a distaste for such a brute leading the Sith. ‘Revan deserves the chance to lead us, the most powerful of all the Sith Lords. I can undo the pathetic personality I helped place in his mind,’ she’d thought, watching Malak bluster about the power he now had. ‘And if I turn him as Malak has turned me... we could be together, and share, the power of the Sith. I’d never be alone ever again, he’d always be with me, could never chance losing me for I could defeat him.’
Malak had nodded with satisfaction as she’d walked off to the docking ring, so sure of his hold over her.
Huddled in the pilot chair on the Hawk, Bastila moaned in terrible guilt at the memory of what she'd done. She raised her hands and looked at them, she could see the blood of her victim staining them, though the searing saber blade had spilled none.
’I failed. I killed that woman in cold blood. Worse, I wanted to and reveled in it. Her death is on my hands for the rest of my life,’ she thought miserably. ‘So she was a Sith, and a torturer, but she was helpless and I should have shown mercy.’
Sighing, she shifted in the chair and gently tugged at one of her ponytails. ‘Worse, what the hell was I thinking!? I actually wanted to twist Revan to the dark side! I wanted him to take me as his apprentice, to have him teach me power. I wanted him more than anything to touch me with dark passion, with burning desire, to take me to depths I’d never dreamed of! What happened to having his simple love? To being with him?’
Even as she asked herself the question, she knew the answer. She’d been afraid of losing him. A Jedi should not love, she knew that and had been trained to believe in it by them. Then, she’d found herself falling in love and it had felt wonderful, wonderful and right. She’d known then, even as he’d kissed her on the Hawk, that the Council could take him away from her. She’d been frightened and the Sith had seemed the perfect answer. Turn him to the dark side and become his, in every way... succumb to her own passions, and succumb to his.
Her thoughts turned back once again to how easily Malak had turned her. She knew her emotional control had been weaker than others, but still…
‘I should have stopped Malak from using my own hatred against me. For all of my training, it took a fallen Jedi who loved me to bring me back. But what does that make me?’
Bastila rocked back and forth in the chair as she fought with her inner guilt and asked herself questions she’d gone over again and again, unable to stop.
‘Am I a Jedi or not?’ she thought glumly. ’If I am not a Jedi then what am I? Do I have the right to ask for both love and the Force? Do I have the right to ask for love from someone I lied to?’
Questions she knew she could not answer herself. Yet, she couldn’t face taking them to the one group who could hold the answers she needed. Seeing Master Vandar at the ceremony had been awful. The guilt had welled inside her, even as the admiral had pinned the medal to her chest and offered her and the Council's thanks for aiding Revan. She’d smiled woodenly and nodded in thanks and had stood there waving to the crowds even as she knew the Council on Coruscant had requested her presence, no doubt to discuss her fall and an acceptable punishment.
“The fall of Bastila, the proud and wilful.... I could live with that I suppose,” she muttered aloud, even as the thought of such a tale being woven into Jedi archives filled her with dread. What filled her with even more horror was the possibility of being cast from the Jedi completely or castigated to the very beginning of Jedi training. The stigma would be more than she could bear, especially if Revan was there when it happened.
Pulling herself from the cockpit chair, Bastila went to move towards the rear of the ship and her darkened bunk. A chime on the Hawk’s comms panel pulled her around and she turned reluctantly towards it. With a few button presses, the message scrolled across the screen and her eyes widened in shock.
Emotion, yet peace. |
Ignorance, yet knowledge.
Passion, yet serenity.
Chaos, yet harmony.
Death, yet the Force.
|Jedi Striker||Jul 2 2010, 06:02 AM Post #4|
Revan sat on the sandy beach and watched the sun slowly begin to sink into the horizon. He’d been filled with many thoughts and emotions despite his attempts to be at peace with himself.
How many people had he been responsible for killing in this war? Hundreds, thousands... Soldiers, innocents, other Jedi. How much blood was on his hands? How many people had followed him, believed in him and the Sith. How many, ultimately, had he betrayed on both sides as the war had raged on?
He sighed, depression and guilt tearing at him, and looked out to sea once more. Everything that he'd believed in about himself and this damn war had been a lie. His name, where he came from... even his past occupation. How much of all he could recall about himself was true? More importantly, how much was all a lie? The Council had thought it was doing the right thing, but if that was so and he had been redeemed in the light... Why did the Council’s decision seem more and more like an option the Sith would have used. Who had the right to take everything that made someone who they were away?
The sand whispered under his hands and he ran his fingers through the soft layers. His mind was like the sand on this damn beach. Each grain was a question and as he disturbed one, others moved as well. All he had were questions and the guilt that went with them.
‘And the one thing I do have, the one thing I don’t want to let go of, is wrong in the eyes of the Jedi Code. I love her so much… hell, even more than before. I can’t live without her and I don’t want to try! But it was my love that dammed her to the dark side, my love that made her sacrifice herself.’ He looked up and guilt swelled inside him. ‘My fault that she was tortured until she couldn't take any more. I saved her, but for what? She feels she failed me, the Jedi, and mostly herself. I know that she does, but she’s wrong, it was my fault. By the Force, what am I going to do? How can I face her when everything that happened to her was my fault. Everything that was put in motion, caused by me.’
“A credit for your thoughts, young knight?” a familiar voice asked gently behind him as soft footfalls crunched through the sand.
Revan felt the familiar presence of Master Vandar slowly hobble next to him, but he kept his eyes fixed on the last parts of the setting sun, until a grunt sounded as the old Master slowly sat on the sand.
“I was just thinking about stuff, that's all,” Revan muttered softly, running his hands through the sand once more. Vandar watched him quietly.
“I can sense where your thoughts run, young Knight. Many things cause you concern. The war, the loss of so much life on both sides, and your part in all of this." Vandar watched as Revan's hands stopped moving in the sand and tightened slightly. “Then, of course, you have your own problems. One of which we, the Council, have brought upon you and one which you may have brought upon yourself.”
Revan sighed and turned to the small green alien who sat with his cane between his knees. Vandar watched his face carefully and saw the guilt flashing in his eyes. “Despite your refusal to follow some aspects of the Jedi Code, it was not your fault that Bastila fell to the dark side.”
“No, you're wrong. It was my love that dammed her, gave Malak a pressure point to use against her. Hell, it was her love for me that made her charge him on the Leviathan, even though she knew she'd never win.”
Vandar looked at Revan. “So, you feel it is solely your fault she fell to the dark side... I cannot lie to you, it’s possible you did assist her descent and you know why. You knew a Jedi should never love, you knew where it could lead, but you did not have training to resist such emotions. However, we sent Bastila with you for the very reason that she had been trained to resist such emotion. Yet, she surrendered to it herself.”
Revan laughed bitterly and Vandar looked up from the sand he too had been studying for answers. “You can't resist love, Master, it's too powerful,” Revan said quietly. “I didn't think, hell, at first I didn't want to fall in love with Bastila. So stubbornly proud of being a Jedi, that’s all I remember thinking at our first meeting. Then, you started to train me. You know how hard I found it sometimes.”
Vandar nodded. “Many young Jedi do. You may have achieved in weeks what others take years to do, but I saw how hard it was sometimes. Some lessons cannot be recalled, no matter how powerful the Jedi, they have to be re-learned.”
Revan smiled at the memory. “Well, the one person I could turn to was Bastila. She knew so much and was willing to share anything I needed, and she dropped her abrasive attitude each time as well. I felt myself falling for her and then as we tried to find the Star Maps, so much happened and she was always there, helping me cope, to decide to do the right thing. I owe her everything I am and, and I found myself falling for her.” Revan looked at Vandar as he shifted slightly. “I tried to resist and so did she. She fought what she felt for me and tried so hard to control her emotions. It wasn't her fault, Master Vandar...”
Revan trailed off as the last few inches of sun vanished under the horizon and the sky began to darken. “In the end, her heart decided for her.” He shook his head at the irony of the situation Bastila and himself had found themselves in. “All the people she could fall for, it had to be the fallen Jedi she’d been sent to protect.”
He watched as the dark blue sky continued to fade into blackness. “The link we shared may have had something to do with it. Guess I should have realized that the Force wanted us to be together, no matter how many codes it violated.”
Vandar looked at Revan, his face impassive, except for the eyes, which looked troubled. “The link you and Bastila share was and is dangerous, we should have realized it as such. Although it is rare, there have been other Jedi who have had such a link created between them. Each time it has proven to be hard for them to control their emotions, especially love for each other. We should have realized it could have led to this, led to Bastila and yourself becoming more than fellow Jedi. Perhaps we should have stopped any chance of this occurring.”
Revan looked at him, appalled. “How can you say that? Having her love kept me going, even when she'd been kidnapped. I hung on the link between us, willed her realize I was coming. The link we shared, the love, saved her from the dark side. Besides,” he looked at Vandar once again, “the Dantooine Council is in a fine position to lecture me or her on morals.”
He looked away and began to fiddle with his new double-bladed saber hilt and, as Vandar opened his mouth to speak, shot him a look. “I can't live without her, Master Vandar, and the Council will have to get used to it. If they really want, I’ll face a tribunal or something. But she’s up there in the Hawk right now, beaten and broken in spirit and she won’t speak to me. She’s even blocking anything I try through our bond and it’s tearing me apart! Despite the guilt I feel, I need her help!” He felt his anger and desperation rise and fought to control his temper. “Help to understand who I am... What I am! The Council erased my personality, but I still get flashbacks, some of which I wake from screaming. Do you know how many times I'd wake to find Mission standing there, distraught, almost crying?”
Revan paused and felt the bitterness inside him. A gentle pressure on his arm made him look down. Vandar's left hand rested gently on his arm. “Peace, my friend. It was and remains something you cannot blame yourself for. You are not the Revan that died. I see the difference.”
He sighed and tried to let go of his anger. “I was Revan, but I remember so little about who I was. You gave me a new identity when Bastila came to you with my broken mind. You gave me a name, past, and occupation; all of which were false and I can't keep going any more knowing and living this, this lie of who I am. I neither want to be Revan or who you created! I’ve heard the arguments you gave Bastila for doing this, but the fact remains that you stole everything that I was. Then when you found I had information and skills you needed, you asked Bastila to guide me and try to pull any memories I had left from my mind. No matter how hard I try, I... I can't forgive you for that. I blamed Bastila at first, the woman who saved my life had betrayed me. The ashamed look she gave me then still fills me with guilt. So, now I'm the ‘redeemed Jedi Revan. Hero of the Republic’, and I should feel happy, but I can’t. Bastila's guilt, her own impossible position, coupled with the loss of who I was, the false life I always thought I’d had. That’s what I can't forgive the Council for, what I don’t want to forgive you for!”
Vandar sighed, “Such anger.” Revan grunted and Vandar could see his struggle with it. “All of it justifiable. Understand, Revan, that we had little choice in the matter, or rather no choice at all. When Bastila brought your body to us, you were barely alive. It had been her use of the Force and nothing more that had allowed the flicker of life in your shattered body to remain. I remember coming into that room, seeing her covered in soot, and grease from dragging you to safety. Such exhaustion etched into her face as her force flowed into you at a terrible rate, even as the medics struggled to continue what she’d begun. Watching the two of you in that room was terrible to see, especially when we found that your mind had been ruined from the damage to your brain.”
Vandar ran his fingers through the sand once more as Revan leaned back and watched the dark sky, behind them the temple lit up as the party’s lights slowly flickered into existence. The warm glow was welcome, but Revan felt a cold knot tighten in his belly as he listened.
“It was decided – not just by us – but also by the Council on Coruscant, that we owed it to what you had once been to try and give you a future. We had so little to work with, some even thought any chance we had of restoring you to a level where you could look after yourself was slim. To accomplish the restoration we had to use the most powerful method of instilling the Force power needed to try and heal your mind. Although the Council had the ability – or so we hoped – to at least try and restore something of you, we needed help.”
Revan looked at Vandar and knew the answer. “I knew that Bastila saved my life, I guess I owe her my mind too.”
Vandar looked at Revan with a troubled glance. “Bastila provided the link we needed, reluctantly I might add, when she found out we could not restore your mind, even if we had wanted to. The process took many days of concentration and we had little hope of succeeding no matter how many of us concentrated, the damage seemed too severe.”
“After five days or so something odd happened, your mind began to... heal itself. At first we had been trying to simply imprint enough into you so that you could have basic abilities; such as feeding yourself, walking and talking. Your mind was that damaged, we thought it would be all we could achieve. Later... later it became easier to imprint even more complex memories into your mind, until eventually who you are now was created.”
Vandar looked at Revan and smiled sadly. “I wish I could say that what we did, we did out of compassion. I suppose there is one person there that day that did, even though she thought our idea of using you might be wrong. It had been the will of the Council and we were never immoral and never wrong. I wish, however, I could believe that.” Vandar fiddled with a few sand grains and continued.
“I still believe that you should have been told and not just when your Force power began to manifest itself. We should have given Bastila permission to tell you what happened to you as soon as you could have coped. However, the other Council members thought it would be too dangerous and forbid Bastila or myself from telling you. They thought they were protecting you from your past, but I wonder now if they were protecting themselves from having to face what they had done, as well as fearing what could remain locked in your mind.”
“It could be argued that erasing what little remained of the previous Revan’s personality trails close to the dark side, Master Vandar."
“Exactly. It took many days to decide to do even that. However, Malak's attacks and the desperate position the Republic and we found ourselves in, made the decision for us. So, we reprogrammed your mind and gave you a new personality and past. Bastila was assigned to look after you when she realized she could ‘feel’ what you did and also sometimes ‘see’ your dreams.” He sighed once again. “I remember how terrified she was when it first happened. She came to me first, I don't know why. She was distraught, despite all her training in emotional control, tears were running down her face. Eventually, she managed to explain that she had ‘seen’ the battle of Revan's flagship from your viewpoint and it scared her. I knew what had happened then and the Council confirmed it with further testing."
“Oh Bastila...” Revan sighed, feeling guilty.
“Imagine how she felt, young Knight. Bastila is many things... Willful, proud, and sometimes, yes, she can be full of herself. However, she is also a very private person, deeply emotional despite all our efforts. When she found you would be able to see and feel what she had... it upset her terribly. We feared that you would both become agents of evil, but we had no choice and I, for one, am glad it has turned out this way. It could have been so much worse.”
Vandar looked up at the inky sky, searching for answers to the questions he knew Revan needed explanations for. “I cannot say that my colleagues are… pleased, by what has happened to you and young Bastila. However, I think that love is possibly the best outcome in this situation. As to what we did to you... All I can say is that the Council regrets what it had to do, but it was necessary at the time and it was done with that in mind “
Revan nodded but his look of uneasiness and his annoyance with the Council remained. “Those still don'’t answer the question of who I am, what I am! Who has the answers about my mind? I need to know why it began to mend itself, why I’m not a gibbering vegetable!” He looked at Vandar and cocked his head slightly. “Does anyone know the answers?”
“Our knowledge of the Force was… disrupted by the battle with the Sith and Exar Kun. Not only did we lose a large number of good Jedi in that battle, but our archives were disrupted and a large portion of the older knowledge stolen by the Sith. The method we had to use in order to repair your damaged mind is ancient, one of the oldest actually. Although we knew it could possibly save your mind, how it actually works is contained in a holocron missing from the archives.” Vandar felt Revan's anger drain slowly away. “I’m sorry, Revan, the answers you seek lie elsewhere than on Dantooine or Coruscant.”
Revan nodded slowly. “I’d still like to see the Council on Coruscant. One of the Masters there may know of a place I could begin looking.” He looked at Vandar once more. “Besides, I know that they want to see Bastila. I’m not leaving her to see them alone.”
Vandar nodded, he had expected as much. Revan didn't miss much around him. “I shall inform them that you will be there as her counsel. As much as your love and desire to protect her is the real reason, it does not allow you access into the chamber with her. By giving you the act of counsel you can remain with her no matter what is discussed. Please, accept this as part of the apology for what we did to both of you, and my own personal gratitude.”
Revan smiled at the wizened Jedi Master and bowed as he rose from the beach. Suddenly, a flash of emotion from Bastila slammed into him and his head snapped upward to look at the temple and the beach beyond, where the Hawk lay. Vandar felt the change in Revan's emotions and looked up at the Knight with concern.
“Young Revan, what is it?”
He looked at Vandar and swallowed as Bastila’s shock rippled through him. “Something’s wrong with Bastila... something powerful enough to knock aside her guilt, even for a little while... I can’t tell what, but...”
They both looked around as a roar from the other side of the temple echoed down the beach. Revan was the first to recognize it, the main engines of the Ebon Hawk in full burn. He looked up, as its bulk rose in a dark shadow above the temple and began to slide towards the sky.
“Bastila...” he whispered into the link and the air. “What's wrong, what’s happened?”
He felt her withdraw from him as he reached out, blocking him once again as she had with her guilt. He couldn’t break through to her without pushing, something he’d never tried and didn't want to.
The Hawk flew across the beach and buffeted them with its downward thrust exhaust as it hammered across the sky before boosting into full power and roaring upwards. Revan and Vandar watched it slowly dwindle until a faint female voice began to call Revan, growing in strength.
“Rev, Rev! Bastila’s taken the Hawk!” Mission came dashing across the dunes, worry and panic creasing her young features. “She’s gone, but she left a datacube on the beach for you. I dunno what’s in it though. Kinda personal maybe.”
Revan touched the young Twi'lek on the shoulder and took the cube from her hands, the others of his group had caught up with her and came dashing over.
“Where's the Hawk?”
“Bastila took it... Why?”
“Query: Do we hunt the female meatbag down?”
Revan looked at them all gathered in one spot and with a shrug activated the datacube. Text flashed up on the screen, a short message and his lover's face, rumpled and tearful. “I've got to go. It's a personal matter on Coruscant, so you don't need to come. I'll be back on Dantooine as soon as possible. I love you, take care. Bast.”
Revan looked up at Carth. “We need a ship, as fast as possible...”
Carth tilted his head in a slight nod and looked at Revan's face, the upset in his eyes. “Sure, I'll see what the Admiral can rustle up... Where do we need to go?”
Revan looked around at his friends and sighed. “She's gone to Coruscant... It's personal, but I think she'll need my help. You lot can stay here if you want. Zaalbar, I know you want to get back to Kashyykk, so I release you from your life debt. Thank you for all your help.”
Zaalbar stood shocked and then roared his approval.
He nodded and bowed to the Wookie. Turning, he looked at the others. “Any of you want to take up the offers flooding in from the Republic can do so, you don't need my permission.”
Carth sighed and looked up at the temple clouded in shadows. His son was at the party and Revan could tell he needed to remain also. “I, I need to spend some time with Dustil, I'm sorry, Revan, really. Look, I'll get you the fastest ship I can pilfer from Dodonna but I have to stay with him, get reacquainted. You don't need a pilot. I know you can fly!”
Revan nodded and smiled at him. “I understand, and a fast ship is all I'm asking for. Anyone else?”
Mission looked at him and at the huge Wookiee who had been her friend for many years. Sad though she was to see him go, she was pleased that it would be to his father’s side. "Well I'm sticking with you, Rev, and it seems everyone else is too. Z you take care on Kashyykk and, and I'll try to visit soon okay?”
Mission blushed and turned away as a feeling of sorrow overwhelmed her for a few seconds. Her life was changing so quickly, a street urchin one-day and a hero of the republic the next. Sniffing slightly, she turned back to see Zaalbar and Revan both watching her with sad smiles. “What? Look,” she pointed at Zaalbar, “you get going and I'll see you soon.” She pointed at Revan. “You and me have got a ship to board and a girlfriend to find. So lets hussle!”
Revan smiled at her flustered expression and nodded, he turned to the others. “What about you lot?”
Jolee and Juhani looked at each other and back at Revan. They nodded both sporting smiles. Canderous merely shrugged. “I've got nothing planned up at the moment. Don’t even think of trying to suggest the Republic to me. They wouldn’t like my ideas of tactics at all. I’ll hang around until I can find another merc job, I suppose. That of course, is if you still want me around Revan.'
Revan nodded and Canderous bowed slightly. He looked around at his friends and felt a feeling of honor fill him. “I just want to say, before some of us part company, that it has been an honor and a privilege to call you all friends. No matter where the Force takes us in the future, I will always consider you so... Now, let’s get to Coruscant, Bastila needs me, no matter how much she pretends otherwise.”
Vandar watched as they moved swiftly up the beach and sighed to himself. As much as he knew the code of the Jedi, as much as he believed in its warnings of emotion, Bastila and Revan did need each other and the Force knew that, as much as they, it seemed. [I['Even after my hundreds of years of learning about the Force I can still be surprised by the choices it takes. First, a link as deep as life and death and now love, the two of them could have been a power for either side and yet the redeemed saved the fallen, and all through love. Who are we to argue with the will of the Force?'[/I]
With a wry grunt, he wandered back up the beach to discuss these events with his fellow Jedi. The Council had to be informed, especially some of his colleagues on Coruscant.
Emotion, yet peace. |
Ignorance, yet knowledge.
Passion, yet serenity.
Chaos, yet harmony.
Death, yet the Force.
|Jedi Striker||Jul 2 2010, 06:03 AM Post #5|
The Ebon Hawk burst out of hyperspace and hurtled towards the vast planet in front. Coruscant, its entire surface covered in one huge city, gleamed brightly in the darkness of space. Bastila looked out of the cockpit’s window and watched the gossamer threads of the vast airways, making up the City Streets, flicker. She waited silently, feeling the emptiness of the [I[Hawk[/I]’s crew compartment behind her.
'I had to go on my own!' she thought, trying to convince herself that she wasn't making a terrible mistake. 'This has nothing to do with him... He has more important matters to deal with.'
She wished that the sick feeling in the pit of her stomach would vanish, that secretly she didn't wish Revan was here now, to hold her.
“There is no emotion, only peace,” she muttered, even as part of her yearned for him. “I can do this on my own, I can.”
“Attention, this is Coruscant planetary traffic control, sector 4. Please state your purpose and destination.”
Bastila leaned across to the Hawk's communication panel and hit a button. “Control, this is the Ebon Hawk, Bastila Shan piloting. I wonder if you could help me locate someone.”
“Hawk, this is control. Certainly, Ms. Shan; who is it you wish to find?”
Bastila ran a hand through her hair, closing her eyes for a second to center herself and grip her emotions as much as possible. Wishing she felt calmer than she did, Bastila sighed and hit “transmit” once more. “I'm looking for Helena Shan, my mother. I understand she's been transferred to the Shinkata hospital but I've no idea where that is on Coruscant. Can you help me?”
“Just a second Hawk... Okay. I've got one hospital by that name and a Helena Shan is currently present there, I can’t tell you any more due to information restrictions but I guess you'll be able to find out, huh?”
Bastila closed her eyes for a second as a quick stab of fear clenched her. Concentrating she felt it dissipate, and replaced by determination. She reached for the controls of the Hawk and ran a pre-systems landing check. “Can you guide me in control?”
“Sure. Head for beacon four twenty six alpha and then enter destination code sigma ninety when it queries you. It’ll light your path right there, just follow the guide boxes.”
“Hawk confirms and thanks you.”
She snapped the autopilot off standby and entered the control beacon co-ordinates. The Hawk banked slowly and rotated upright as it began to enter the atmosphere of the planet. As its heatshields glowed red from re-entry, Bastila watched quietly, absorbed in her own thoughts. Her mother’s pale face swam in front of her, sick but determined as she confronted the young woman who had been her daughter. The meeting had been difficult and painful for them both. Even now, she remembered the anger and hostility that had been present when they’d met. Both so proud and both too stubborn to admit any love for the other.
'So foolish,' she muttered, thinking of her own hostility.
Revan had been there, as always, when she’d come back to give the holocron of her father to Helena. She’d been reluctant to give it up and quick, harsh words had followed. Words she regretted now, especially when she discovered her mother had been dying.
'Will one of you, give the other a break?' She remembered that too. Revan standing there awkward but determined to help any way he could.
Now, of course, it was all different. Helena had told her she was dying from a slow killer and that all that had been done could have been. Bastila felt the guilt resurface in her stomach, causing it to knot painfully at her own happiness over reconciling the differences with her mother, to being dashed by the terrible news. But she still had a chance to be with her mother, for as long as the Force would allow her to remain and it would be her who would tell her mother what had happened... and then she would submit to her final choice.
'You there, look after my daughter!' He had done as much as any person could have done in the circumstances and more. It had been her fault she’d fallen, hers alone. Bastila looked across as the spires of Coruscant slid into view and sighed. She’d decided also, that it was time the Council on Coruscant knew what had happened to her. She would accept their punishment, not matter what it would be, without hesitation. 'Another reason why he’s better off without me,’ she thought sadly. 'I won’t let Revan’s chance at being forgiven be damaged by my moment of weakness.’
She sighed once more and jerked from her thoughts at the chiming of the guide beacon requesting a destination code. She clicked the code into the comm’s panel and watched as green guide boxes appeared on the navicom panel. Steering towards the center of the boxes, Bastila guided the Hawk slowly towards the glittering steel spire of Shinkata hospital.
“THIS was the best Dodonna could do?”
Mission looked around in disgust at the cramped cargo hold of the freighter she, Revan and the others currently occupied. Revan sighed in resignation and looked up from the floor where he’d been meditating. Juhani and Jolee both sat next to him, both blissfully unaware of the irate Twi’lek standing in front of them.
“We'll have to rough it until we get to Coruscant and the Hawk, okay?” He looked around and winced slightly as his own words came back to haunt him.
The freighter was fast, faster than he’d hoped it could have been. Dodonna had supplied them with the Gambler’s Luck, a smuggler’s vessel that one of the ships had apprehended before being recalled by Carth’s desperate message. It was fast; not as fast as the Hawk admittedly, but fast enough. However, having been a Rodian vessel, it wasn’t exactly kitted out for comfort. He also had to admit that she wasn’t the cleanest ship he’d seen either. None of them had ventured to sleep in any of the bunks after Mission had pulled some rather explicit magazines from under one of the covers. Juhani had decided at that point to meditate for the whole journey and currently sat peacefully in the middle of the empty cargo hold. Jolee had swigged something out of a bottle he’d pilfered from the party and was also sitting in the cargo hold, only the snoring coming from his wizened frame the give-away as to his preferred course of passing the time.
“Rev, have you seen the food synthesiser? It’s not been cleaned in months. I lived better than this in the Taris slums! Oh, and also where am I and Canderous going to sleep?”
“Well, I last saw him pulling the mags you found, from the bin in the crew annex and wandering off to the back bunks. He had a sly smile on his face I recall, I think he quite liked one of the Twi’lek on the cover...”
Mission looked at Revan in horrified disgust and made a face. Juhani opened her eyes and quietly watched the two of them bickering. There was too much raw emotion for the Cathar to concentrate on meditation and she decided to lend the obviously flustered Revan a hand.
“Mission my dear, why not just use one of the survival packs from the environmental lockers and unroll the sleeping bag onto the medi-bay couch?”
Mission paused in her rant at Revan and thought for a few seconds. Slowly she nodded. “Well, I suppose that could work. It won’t be as comfortable as the Hawk’s bunks but I suppose I've slept on worse.” She paused and a look of discomfort swam onto her face. “But there’s no way on Taris that I'm sleeping on my own in there! The med-bay’s only two doors down from the crew bunks, and I'm NOT having that Mandalorian getting any ideas!”
Revan sighed and tried to hide a smile as he stood up. Looking at Juhani, he winked and she tilted her head down slightly in amused agreement. “Okay, Mission, okay. How about I come with you and meditate outside the doorway to the med-bay? It’ll give you privacy and security and I’ll be in the warm. This cargo hold’s too cold.”
“Huh, Ju’s coping okay, so’s Jolee. You’re only doing this cause you think I’m being silly.”
Revan sighed and felt a part of himself glower at Juhani’s growing amusement. The Cathar, sensing his annoyance, refolded her legs and closed her eyes. Soon she was a picture of serenity, but Revan could hear the slight purr in each breath she took, something he’d come to recognize as her version of a snigger.
“Juhani’s got fur, Mission. She’s walking around in the equivalent of a thermal coat all the time, so it’s no wonder she’s not cold. As for Jolee, I doubt he could feel anything the state he’s in! Look, do you want to get some sleep or not? I have enough things to worry about as it is!”
Mission’s face fell slightly as guilt crept into it. She shuffled slightly on the deck and felt embarrassed. “I’m sorry, Rev. I… I’d be really happy if you’d come and keep an eye on me, I mean on Canderous. I’d feel a lot safer, especially now Big Z's not here.”
Revan smiled and nodded at the young woman and slowly picked himself up off the floor. Dusting his white robes from the Starforge he looked at them with a frown. “You know... I may just go and see one of the Jedi Enclave tailors while we’re on Coruscant. These robes aren't exactly flattering. Maybe something in dark blue and black, trousers definitely...”
Juhani's purrs increased in volume slightly and Revan looked across. “I heard that!” he muttered and turned to follow the Twi’lek to the medical bay.
Juhani opened her eyes one more time, slitted in amusement. Her serene expression slipped into a smile and she laughed quietly into the soft hum of the hold. Life was going to be very interesting, she could tell.
A few days later, the Luck had finally arrived at Coruscant and hung in orbit. As Revan moved forward into the cockpit to contact orbital traffic control, three Republic fighters roared up from the atmosphere and surrounded the freighter. Sensors showed that all of the fighters were armed and all of the weapons were active and ready to shoot. He sighed and looked back to the others.
“Just out of interest, did anyone happen to ask why Dodonna actually bothered to capture this vessel?” Everyone shook his or her head and he groaned. “Thanks Carth! Okay, let’s get ‘em on the comm before we’re floating atoms.”
He reached across to the comm panel and flicked “transmit”. With a crackle, the comm panel shorted out and he groaned once more, rubbing a hand through his hair. “T3, the panels shorted out, so get your repair cap on and fix the thing before the trigger happy space jockeys out there decide to shoot first and ask questions later. I’ll power down the engines to show we’re not going to run or do anything stupid. Oh, and could one of you remind me to have words with Carth? I know I asked for a ship in a very short amount of time, but giving us one – which obviously has a record as long as this – is ridiculous!”
T3 rumbled in from the crew lounge and, extending a probe behind the panel, began to fiddle around. “Bleep, beep boo.”
“What? Well, just fix it then.”
“Beep, beep, beeoop, beep”
“Oh great, so how many are actually radio parts and how many are from, well, everything else?”
“90 percent? Well what would you suggest we do?”
“Beep, booip beep.”
“Okay fine. Re-route it through your auxiliary processor set and boost the signal, which should give us enough range... I hope.”
“… ontrol. Repeat, this is Coruscant traffic control. Gam... uck, you are wanted for the mass transport of spice... laves and dangerous animals. You are required to surrender your vessel for immediate boarding, where you will be placed under arrest.”
“Carth I swear”' Revan muttered, pushing his annoyance away with the Force and calming himself. “Coruscant control, this is Jedi Knight Revan in command of the Gambler’s Luck. Admiral Dodonna has lent us this ship to apprehend ours, please call off your fighters and we’ll gladly follow any course you care to plot.”
“Jedi Revan? Please establish visual connection so we may verify your identity.”
Revan sighed and ran his right hand through his hair once more. “Control, Revan. I’m afraid that our comm system has taken a hell of a beating. We can’t establish visual communication and to be honest, the only reason I’m speaking to you now is thanks to a T3 astro droid we have on board. The whole ship’s falling apart and we need to land...”
“Gambler’s Luck, control. We cannot allow you free entry into Coruscant space without confirmation of your identity. This ship is wanted for breaking through ten or more blockades and the destruction of Republic property. However, we will allow you to land on a police pad as long as you follow our escort. Once down and if your identity checks out, we'll gladly help you locate your missing ship.”
Revan sighed with relief and patted T3 on the head. The little droid bleeped happily and adjusted its tiny communication dish with finicky precision. Revan flipped himself into the pilot seat, grimacing at the slightly sticky fabric. “Understood, control, we’re as ready as you are so get those fighters into escort and let's go. I honestly have no idea how long this thing’ll stay up before gravity pulls it back down!”
A sound of laughter crackled up from the comm and the voice, which had been so cautious, came back, obviously amused. “Okay Jedi sir. Head to platform 3 by following fighter t564, he’s flashing his exhaust now.” Revan watched as one of the fighters engines flickered into a burst of flame and then died. “Do you see him Gambler’s Luck?”
Revan nodded to himself and confirmed identification with Coruscant. With a flick of a switch, he set the engines of the hunk of junk they were in to minimum power. Slowly, the Luck began to move forwards, the fighters guiding it down to the planet below.
Mission walked forwards into the cockpit and leaned on the back of Revan’s pilot chair, watching as the huge cityscape faded into view through the clouds. Although it bore a startling resemblance to Taris, it was obvious to her eyes that Coruscant was different. The main thing she realized was the sheer hustle and bustle of people, speeders and transports on the walkways and airways around the huge skyscrapers. Revan pointed in the distance and she craned her neck to see what he was pointing out. Far away, she was able to make out four thin and tall towers, brilliant white in color, arranged in a soothing pattern. At the base was a neat arrangement of unimposing buildings.
“The grand Jedi Temple and Council buildings,” Revan said quietly, turning to watch Mission’s face. He grinned. “Somewhere I used to think was uninspiring and rather pointless, when I believed I was plain old... when I was someone else.”
Mission looked down at him and smiled back, her smile fading as he turned to gaze out the window once more. Despite his joking, she could tell how many the memories of his “created” past hurt him. Shaking her head sadly, Mission looked out of the window and to the squat building they were descending to. The police speeders arranged around the pad they were about to land on identified the buildings use. Revan piloted in the Luck carefully, groaning slightly as one of the thrusters failed to ignite and the ship landed with a bump onto the platform, shocking the eight or so police waiting around the entrance to the landing reception.
He shut down the systems and called back to Juhani. She opened the main hatch and stood back respectfully as a lieutenant flanked by two patrolmen stepped in. As the man opened his mouth to speak however, Revan stepped into the cockpit, flanked by Mission and HK-47. He paused and cleared his throat, as he was sure the robot was eyeing him in a funny way.
“Who is the commander of this ship, please?” he managed, turning away from the droid’s steady glare.
“I am. Jedi Knight Revan at your service... Lieutenant?”
“Cartina, Master Jedi. Would you mind explaining how you came to be in possession of such a ship?” He shuffled. The droid was still watching him and it made Cartina uncomfortable. “We understand you mentioned Admiral Dodonna to the planet control network...?”
“Yes, the admiral lent us this ship to get to Coruscant. We have a missing crewmember to find and I needed the fastest ship I could get. Dodonna gave us this one.” Revan watched the policeman carefully, his Force aura radiated disbelief, but grudging admiration.
“This hunk of bolts was the fastest ship the admiral could give you? I can’t believe that, I mean just look at it!”
“Statement: This ship has been massively upgraded in terms of engine power and hyperspace ability. Do not doubt the Master’s word you jumped up, meat...'”Revan quickly slapped his hand onto HK-47's back and fed a jolt of Force energy into the droid, enough to make it pause for a second. Cartina looked baffled and eyed the droid apprehensively.
“Did he just call me a ‘jumped up, meat…’?”
Revan looked at the others and then back at Cartia, smiling politely. “I do apologize for him, we went through an ion storm and he's been a little odd recently. I’ll have him go through a data check as soon as you let us go.”
Cartina frowned and then shrugged. He pulled a datacube from his belt and consulted it carefully. Revan and the others stood quietly as he did so, Revan’s hand still placed firmly against HK-47’s back who, indignantly, remained quiet. Finally, Cartina nodded and looked at them with a smile.
“Well, it seems you are indeed Revan, I thought it was you from the holonet news, but I had to be sure. Oh, and Master Revan?” Revan looked at him politely. “The Jedi Council sent a message for you through the planetary control. I presume they knew you would be coming to Coruscant and so wanted you to know. They request that I give you this; it's private, sir.”
Revan frowned for a few seconds and took the proffered data wafer. “Thanks. I take it we’re free to go?' he asked, feeling desperate to find Bastila.
“Of course, Master Revan. Welcome to Coruscant. Now, is there anything else that we can do for you?”
“Well as a matter of fact, yes. Could you run a check on two things for me? I need to find a ship registered as the Ebon Hawk, and I need to find one Bastila or Helena Shan. I think they're at a hospital on Coruscant but I don't know where.”
“Ahh fine, I'll just run that through our computers hang on... Aha, here we go. The Ebon Hawk is currently designated landing permission on pad 42a of Shintaka Hospital. Bastila Shan... well, she may be there, but I do have a Helena Shan registered as a patient, but I can't get anymore data, restricted by privacy laws.”
Revan looked at Mission and Juhani glumly, only for Jolee to walk over to him. “Look, lad, we’d better find out what's been going on... more importantly you and Bastila have things to discuss, important things that neither a young Twi’lek or for that matter Juhani need to listen to.” He smiled sadly and winked. “And as for a crusty old fart such as myself, it'd be a bit... painful to see you two together.”
Revan looked at him and then Mission and Juhani and smiled sadly. “How about you and the others go and check the Hawk over. I’m going to find Bastila.”
HK-47 looked across at Revan and stepped back a few meters. “Statement: I shall not leave you, Master. I shall accompany you to the hospital, there is no telling how many Sith assassins may be after you. I shall be there to protect you if they try anything. That is my role as a...” He paused as Revan and the others tensed. “As a bodyguard. Such is my role.”
Revan sighed inwardly and promised himself for the fourteenth time that he would sooner or later reprogram HK's primary functions, or at least teach him to lie better.
Cartina nodded to each of them in turn and left the ship, his patrolmen following slowly so they could glimpse a final look at Revan. Jolee turned to Revan and wagged a finger. “Looks like your destiny has made you a major hero, kid. Don't let it go to your head though!”
Juhani nodded and looked at Revan as he sighed shaking his head. “Yes, you must resist any pride in your achievements... for pride can lead to the dark side.”
Jolee snorted and glanced at the Cathar with a sly smile. “No. I just don’t want him being smug for the next few weeks.” Juhani frowned and shook her head and he sighed. “Look, Juhani, young Revan there may be many things, but a big head – he’s not. He came damn close to losing someone he’s linked to. Believe me that can make pride the last thing you think of.”
Revan, annoyed, cleared his throat and they looked at him, embarrassed. “Could you possibly stop talking as though I'm not here? For your information, I’ve no intention letting anything go to my head.” Juhani opened her mouth and Revan looked at her, she shut it quickly. “And yes, I’m well aware that I’ve got to be on guard with my emotions, thank you. Now if you don't mind, can we find the ship and my lover? Or would you care to discuss my emotional attachments for a few hours more?”
Jolee looked away, trying not to laugh, and Revan ignored the sniggering from Mission. Turning to the hatch he stepped out, HK-47 close behind, and the others followed.
Emotion, yet peace. |
Ignorance, yet knowledge.
Passion, yet serenity.
Chaos, yet harmony.
Death, yet the Force.
|Jedi Striker||Jul 2 2010, 06:04 AM Post #6|
Juhani hissed slightly under her breath as they stepped off the police cruiser they had hitched a lift with. She looked around, her yellow eyes widening at the sight of all the people wandering around. Always uncertain of herself in large groups, she felt hackles rise on the back of her neck. Revan sensed the change in her aura immediately and he turned with a calming look. She nodded at the unspoken question and gripped her uneasiness with her emotional control. Slowly, she felt her discomfort slip away and she sighed, relived. Revan touched her slightly on the shoulder and she smiled at him with a nod.
Looking up, Revan stared at the huge silvery spire of the Shintaka hospital and stopped walking. The others watched as he closed his eyes for a few seconds and reached out slowly, into the bond. He smiled as he felt Bastila’s presence flitter into his mind, the smooth textures of who she was, shining like a beacon. He pulled back slowly, as she seemed ignorant of his presence.
“She's up there, Juhani. I can feel her. Look, you and the others go to the docking stations and find the Hawk.” He looked up at the spire. “I'm going up there.”
The others broke off from him inside the main foyer and while he took a turbolift up to the fifth floor, they went down. He stepped off the lift and smoothly walked across to the reception desk neatly centered in the immaculately polished hallway. A young nurse watched him approach and her eyes flitted to the red droid carefully watching her and everything else in the room. She smiled at him.
“Hello, may I help you, Master Jedi?” she asked, her fingers locating the panic button just in case. “Do you need medical attention? Or are you looking for someone?'”
Revan smiled at her and leaned on the desktop. “Yes. I would like to know which room Helena Shan is in please.”
“Are you a relative?”
“Well, no. But I am... friends with her daughter, who I understand is also here.”
“And the name of Mrs. Shan,s daughter, Master Jedi?”
“Bastila Shan. I know she’s here, by the way.” The nurse looked at him quizzically and he smiled. “Jedi senses, you know.”
“Well, as much as I have great respect for Jedi, sir, I cannot let you see Mrs. Shan unless you are a relative. I can page her room and see if she’ll let you visit?”
The nurse pressed a few buttons and Revan looked around as she did so. The hospital was well funded and the obvious reason hung over the door, a plaque bearing the symbol for incurable disease. The nurse chose that moment to turn back. She smiled. “Well, it seems that Mrs. Shan is happy to see you, so go right on up. She’s on the forty-second floor, room 6B.” She looked at Revan and a trace of sadness slipped into her face. “She's a lovely woman when you get to know her, it’s not fair really.”
Revan nodded and thanked her. He walked across to the patient access turbolift and stepped in, HK right behind him, as the nurse opened the doors. They waited patiently, HK ever watchful for assassins hidden in the roof and sides of the car. The doors eventually slid open on to a brightly-lit corridor with glass doors lining it every few meters along. Revan stepped out and walked briskly down the corridor, glancing at each door number as he did so. Eventually, he reached 6B and looked in.
Helena Shan sat propped up in bed and smiled at him. She waved her hand at him to come through and pressed a button on the bedside table. The door slid silently open and he motioned for HK to remain outside. HK nodded, unusually quiet for once, and assumed position outside the door. Revan looked in once more and stepped into the room.
“Hello, nice to see you again,” Helena whispered with a smile and pointed at a bunk against the wall. Revan looked over and smiled himself, a sigh escaping his lips as he saw the young woman lying on the bunk. Bastila, her young face passive, lay curled in a fetal position in the middle of the bunk, the blankets tucked tightly around her as she slumbered.
“My daughter’s had little sleep for the past few days, so don't wake her,” Helena whispered to him and Revan nodded. He sat in the chair she motioned at and looked at her quizzically.
“So, how is everything, Mrs. Shan. More importantly, how are you?” he asked quietly.
Helena smiled and put down the datapad she’d been reading quietly. She looked at the young man sitting in the chair and felt her interest rise. His face was tired, as tired as her daughter was. She sighed. Unsurprising really, considering what they’d both been through, what little she'’ wormed out of Bastila anyway.
Especially for him though, it wasn’t everyday that you found you had been the most wanted man in the galaxy, destroyed a weapons factory and... and… She looked over at her daughter and sighed again. Not everyday that you had to face someone you thought of as a friend and who tried to kill you.
From what she’d managed to wrangle from her daughter, Helena knew that the young man had been instrumental in bringing Bastila back from this “dark side” the Jedi all talked about. She’d wanted to know more about what happened, but Bastila had clammed up about how she’d been turned and also how Revan had brought her back. With him in front of her, maybe she could have some answers at last.
“I’m fine, young man. Well, as fine as can be when you’ve got an incurable disease. The five hundred credits Bastila gave me were enough to get me a room here, and enough painkillers to keep me comfortable.”
Revan shifted uncomfortably and looked at Helena with regret. “So, there’s no cure for your illness still? Are you sure?”
Helena smiled sadly and glanced once more to ensure Bastila was asleep. “Not really. The doctors tell me that it’s progressed too far for standard drugs to do anything for me.” She looked at him, weighing his trust, and shrugged. “The only other thing that could save my life is a rare and experimental synthetic. I can’t even say the name, but needless to say it’s so new that the cost for a single treatment is prohibitive. The advantage would have been that I’d have a sixty to sixty five percent chance of recovery.”
Revan frowned and looked at her. “So why not tell Bastila about it?”
“Don't you dare! She’d do everything to save me. I can’t tell her about this drug, she’d bankrupt herself trying to find enough credits to give it to me! None of the legal banks would give her the money, a waste of time to even try. I won’t have her in debt to disreputable crime lords either! Please, if you care about her as much as I do, don’t tell her. Just... just let her have this time with me. We’ve caught up on so much and I’ve got so little time left.”
“Okay. But... how much would you need?”
“Oh no, I'm not having her friends getting into debt either!”
Revan looked away to the slumbering figure. He felt embarrassed. “Is that what she said we were? Just good friends?”
Helena smiled knowingly and nodded. “Oh yes. ‘Just good friends,’ she said.” Helena grinned. “She never was a good liar, even as a child. It was always the same when she’d raided the sweet jar. So, young man, what exactly does ‘good friends’ mean in relation to you and my daughter?”
Revan looked at Helena and felt his cheeks redden. He’d faced down Bastila herself, Malak, and Master Vandar. Now, with Bastila’s mother in front of him, he found himself speechless. He looked at her knowing face, her compassionate smile. It made it far worse to explain. He looked away, out of the window and cleared his throat. It'd gone dry.
“I... We... She and I are... Well, I wanted her to…” He took a deep breath and looked back at Helena. “I... I wanted her to be my lover, but she wanted to wait until after we’d completed our mission. Then she got abducted by Malak, trying to save me of all things, and turned to the dark side. I... I had to face her down, actually had to fight her.” He looked over at the sleeping figure. “I would have done anything to save her, anything!”
“Even take her life?” Helena whispered suddenly, a strange look in her eyes. “Oh, she told me about how she joined your enemy, joined the Sith. If... if she’d been lost to this dark side, twisted and evil, would you have taken her life away from her?”
Revan looked at her, a deep knot in his stomach throbbing as he looked at the woman who’d given birth to the woman he loved. The answer came form his heart, unable to keep it back. “To save her from a life of darkness and self destruction? Oh yes... I’d have taken it away, so she could find peace in the Force. I’d have struck with all my love.” He leaned into the chair and closed his eyes. “She’d never have felt a thing.”
Helena watched him for a second and felt tears at the edges of her eyes. Brushing them back, she cleared her throat, watching as Revan's muscles tightened ever so slightly. “I see. That answers many of my questions, yes, many of them.” He opened his eyes and she favored him with a smile. “I've been around a lot, young man. The job Bastila's father and myself had was dangerous. We both made a pact that if one of us was ever hurt too badly to make it back, the other should help in any way possible. Luckily, it never came to that, so I never had to test my resolve.” She looked at Bastila and felt relief creep over her. “You did, and luckily you managed to save her before you had the terrible duty... That’s love, young man. The ability to do anything for the person you love. And you do love her, don't you?”
Revan nodded and sighed as a weight slipped from him. He looked at Helena’s face and smiled sadly. “I love her with all my heart and I think, no, I know she feels the same way. A Jedi shouldn’t love though, it’s a core concept in being a Jedi, so that leaves me and her in a bind, Mrs. Shan. If the Council tries to separate us, what do I do? I can’t just carry on as though nothing happened. It’d destroy her... and me too.
“You do what you think is right, Revan. I’m sure that whatever you choose, you’ll do so wisely. You have a certain… look about you. Whatever you decide... take care of her. Despite everything she is, how strong my daughter can be, she has a fragile and easily breakable heart.” She paused and looked at him. “Did she tell you how she was turned to the dark side?”
“No. I tried to find out just before the victory celebrations, but she didn’t say anything. She just slipped off to the Ebon Hawk.”
Helena sighed. “So, so like her father. Independent and headstrong.” She grinned slightly. 'The stubbornness and pride? That comes from me.” A chuckle escaped from Revan at that and Helena smiled. “You have to make her open up to you. She likes to think she’s totally independent, and strong enough to bear anything that happens to her. She’s wrong though, and she’ll need your help... need it terribly in the coming days. Not only to cope with what happened on that temple she told me about, but also when I go.”
Revan looked at Helena and frowned. “You never did tell me how much you needed to get the treatment.”
“Oh? Well, I suppose you’re bright enough to realize how impossible it would be to make or borrow that much.” She sighed and looked at him. “The cost of a treatment is pointless for me to tell you. I need a whole course or it won't work. So, the current cost of a course is ten thousand credits.”
Revan sat back and nodded.
“As you can see,” Helena whispered, “I can't let Bastila know about this. She’d tear herself apart trying to find the money. I think that she regrets all the years we hated one another, as do I.”
Revan looked at Bastila and sighed. He knew how hard it had been for her to reconcile things with Helena, now the galaxy was playing a terribly cruel trick. As he pondered over what Helena had told him, Bastila’s aura twitched violently. As he felt it in the Force, so Helena saw it on the bunk. Bastila writhed on the mattress and jerked her head from side to side, a whimper escaping her lips. Helena sighed and Revan saw the woman’s face crease with worry.
“Oh dear. Not another one, Bastila... What’s the matter this time?”
Revan looked across at her, concern in his face. “Has she been like this much?” he asked feeling Bastila's terror and guilt flow along their bond, caught as she was in her nightmare.
“She’s had a few nightmares like this. I hate them; they make her so pale and tired. But, what can I do? She won’t talk about it and I can’t go into her mind and see what’s bothering her so...” She looked at him suddenly and raised her eyebrows. He knew what she was thinking and he nodded slowly. “You can...”
“Well, we shared visions of my past life...” He paused at the look she gave him. “Don’t ask. But if we could both see those, I think I may be able to see her dreams.”
Walking across to her jerking form, Revan placed a hand gently onto her forehead. He closed his eyes and concentrated. He could feel the bond between them, almost see it in his mind... but despite knowing how it had been formed, it remained a mystery to him, as it did to Bastila and the Jedi Masters. He remembered how it had felt, when she had been in his dreams, when he had envisioned the Star Maps. With a deep breath, he tried to slip into that state once more and felt the room darken. A feeling passed over him, something new, yet familiar...
A memory... or a dream?
“Please,” the young woman murmured, shaking in terror at the glint in Bastila's eyes. ”Please don't kill me Jedi, I... I don't want to die.”
“What?” Revan’s voice echoed. “Who’s going to kill you? Who are you?”
“I didn't want to be tortured, life can be cruel.”
Revan looked around – disorientated – and realized, in surprise, that he was standing in the temple on Lehon. All the detail was hazy, however, and it took him a few moments for him to remember where he was, a dream world in Bastila’s mind. It was both amazing and discomforting to know he and she could do this. He looked around in disbelief as Bastila’s nightmare played out around him.
Bastila stood looking at a young woman in a Sith uniform, red saber blade poised in front of her to strike. In this dream world, the air shivered as her shadow, so very much alive, seemed to lead every movement. Revan shivered slightly and seeing her face recognized the look in her eyes. It was the same as he had seen when they had fought on the Star Forge.
“Y...you’re a Jedi. All life is sacred, p... please don’t kill me.”
“Not good enough!”
Revan reeled in shock as Bastila sliced the saber across the woman’s arms, laughing at her cry of agony. The woman fell onto the floor, moaning in pain at the cauterized wounds slicing her wrists. Malak began to clap and cheer, egging her on like some sports star. Bastila knelt down close to her ear and Revan felt sick as he watched this twisted version of her whisper.
“I’ll give you another chance to live, try again. Why should I spare you?”
“P... please, show me mercy and I’ll do anything you want. Anything, I’ll be your servant for the rest of my life, only please... spare me.”
Revan watched Bastila stand and felt compelled to do something, anything. “Don’t! Don’t kill her. I'm coming, Bas, I am!”
The dream Bastila ignored him, as did everyone else. He watched the terrible past unfurl, watched what haunted her still. “Well, I’m flattered that you’d give me your worthless life, but letting you live would be an act of mercy.” The woman’s eyes widened in horror. “As the Sith Code states, there's nothing worse than mercy, is there? So why would I bother with it and with you?”
She stood and, even as the woman had cried out to Malak, spun on her heel and stabbed backwards with the red blade. Revan had turned away at that point and tried not to vomit as the scream echoed around the chamber. A gentle “flump” was all that was left as the lifeless body slipped onto the stone. Revan looked up in shock as hundreds of blood red ribbons cascaded from the ceiling and Sith soldiers walked cheering around the corner bearing drink and plates of food. He shook his head, the death had to have been real, and this was obviously part of the dream. He looked at Bastila as she stared down, stared at the slumped figure. She was oblivious to the party going on around her. Revan felt he should say something, even though he knew she wouldn't hear him.
“Bastila, is that what he did to you? How he turned you... What you did to her made you fall?”
The dream Bastila looked up for the first time at his voice and sighed, “Oh yes... I need to be punished for this you know. I did a terrible thing.”
“Why did you strike her down?”
“Out of anger... fear to be truthful. She was very gifted in torture. I've never felt such physical pain in my life, especially when she used stims to keep me conscious. I killed her to stop her ever doing it again. But it was wrong, and I have to pay the price.”
The temple melted away and Revan found himself as a Council member at Coruscant, clad in robes of justice and sitting in one of the Council chairs. Bastila lay in the center of the room, robe torn, hair a mess and hands bound with archaic chains. Her eyes were red and puffy as tears fell onto the floor, her incessant sobbing the only sound filling the chamber. Revan looked around; none of the other Council members seemed moved. He turned to his right, and saw in shock that the head of the Council in her dream was the woman she’d murdered in anger.
“We will now pass judgment on this worthless woman,” the woman ordered smugly and looked around the room. “I remind the Council that a majority count of guilty will mean instant death.”
The heads nodded, all except Revan’s, and the woman turned to Bastila, cold contempt in her eyes. [I[“Guilty,” she announced a vicious smile playing over her lips.
“Guilty,” another council member, this one a Sith, announced loudly.
So it went on around the room. Every single member proclaimed her guilt, and with each one Bastila sobbed harder and harder. The final count came to Revan and the woman looked at him with a sneer.
“You are the last. Don’t let your love blind you to what she did! She struck me down in anger and hatred. She is no Jedi! Not even worth your acknowledgement, let alone your love. The fact of her love for you is also one of her capital crimes. How can she be a Jedi and love you? So she chose love, she wasn’t afraid... But she’s guilty, guilty of that and so much more! So choose”'
Revan looked at her and frowned.
“This is a dream. You were her torturer when Malak took her prisoner.”
“Don't be silly. This is a meeting of the Council of Coruscant. Stop being a fool and choose.” The woman smiled suddenly, dropping her pretext and grinned cruelly at him. “I was an innocent and she struck me down!”
“You were anything but innocent! You tortured her!”
“Maybe, but she struck me down in anger, what kind of a Jedi is she? She has no peace, no center of being. A true Jedi would never have been corrupted!”
Revan got up and walked across to the woman who looked at him angrily. He reached down to her uniform and yanked the zip down. In the centre of her breast bone a neat puncture mark, cauterized and exposing the damage beneath.
“Fine. You’re her guilt in this... I can see that. You tortured her until she couldn't take it anymore. Striking you down may have pushed her further along the dark side but you sent her there first,” he snorted. “I vote not guilty.”
Bastila looked up at that and held her hands out for him to see, they dripped blood. At the same time, the wound in the woman’s chest began to spill blood down her tunic.
“I have her blood on my hands, I killed her and with that I gave up everything I am. Without that, what am I? I have you, I love you... but then I almost killed you on the Star Forge. I... I don’t deserve your love and certainly no compassion!”
Revan felt her agony, at the terrible things she’d done. Felt the guilt and shame that she’d been trying to block from him since he'd saved her on the Star Forge. He sighed and turned to her.
“I forgive you. I’ll be sure to tell you that when you wake up.”
She looked shocked at him, and he smiled at her. Feeling the nightmare begin to unravel due to his interference, he made a decision. She deserved a peaceful sleep. He reached into her mind and with the same instinctive ability, soothed her mind until a calmer sleep slipped into place. Pulling back his own mind from the link, he felt a strange sensation run through him as awareness of the physical world slid back.
Revan’s eyes fluttered open and he looked down at Bastila’s peaceful frame as the bond slid back into his subconscious, and her soothed mind slumbering on. Helena watched with anxiety.
“How long was I gone?” he asked her.
“A few minutes. What happened? Did... did you actually see her dreams? Is it possible for a Jedi to do that?”
He ran a hand through his hair and looked at her; Helena was leaning forward, her face a picture of anxiety. He took a moment to center himself and nodded. “I saw... I saw what happened to her when she slipped to the dark side. She... she killed a woman in anger, the woman had tortured her and she struck her down with hatred! She thinks she should be punished for doing that, and also, I think for loving me. It’s against everything she was taught to believe as a Jedi. It was all a mess, as my dreams often are.”
He looked down at Bastila’s peaceful face and frowned as he put two and two together. “So that’s why Vandar sent me the message when we got here, and why you left without me... didn't you?”
Helena looked confused, at both him and then to her sleeping daughter. “What message? Who’s Vandar? You said she was tortured; who by, for how long? Was that what made her fall to this dark side you Jedi always talk about?”
Revan heard the horror in her voice as she stared at her daughter’s face. Knew that her instinct was to try and heal the hurt. 'The message is for me, it’s about something the Council has been requested to discuss. As for the torture I mentioned,” he watched Helena’s face pale and felt terrible, “yes, she was tortured for at least a week by the woman she eventually killed. It was this that helped turn her to the dark side.”
Helena looked at him sickly, only then realizing how dangerous being a Jedi was for her daughter. "No..."
“She’s been through a lot, a hell of a lot more than she told you... more than she told me for that matter. I think she’s trying to protect me, and – at the same time – wanted to protect you.”
“Well, you’re her mother, it’s only natural she wouldn’t want you to know what happened to her. As for me...” He looked at her, his own guilt ripping past his emotional control. “All of this was my fault, and I refuse to let Bastila take any blame for what happened.”
He felt Bastila stir in her sleep, and looked at Helena. “She’s waking up. Not a word about what I did.”
“Oh, my lips are sealed, I promise. If I tell her any of this she’ll either think I’m mad, or worse yell at you. Neither I want to happen, be honest. After all, someone’s going to have to look after her.” Helena looked at him. “Mind you, I can see now why you look so tired. It’s not just what happened on the Star Forge between you, is it? You’ve had something happen to you too.”
Revan ached to tell someone, anyone about how he felt, but he drew back nonetheless. Now was not the time, especially telling someone who was the mother of the person he was trying to hide his own guilt and pain from.
A sigh from the bunk made him look over as Bastila’s eyes slowly fluttered open, and he slipped quietly further into the corner of the room behind her and watched as she sat up. With a yawn, Bastila looked at Helena with tired eyes. She hid her torment poorly. “How long was I asleep for?”
“A few hours dear, nothing more. You didn’t miss much... They took some blood, gave me a slightly larger shot of painkillers, but I'm fine, still breathing.”
“Don't joke, mother, please... not about this! I... I can’t believe that after all the time I despised you, we’ve got so little left when I want to be with you.” Bastila despondently toyed with her lightsaber, so carefully tucked under the pillow. “Do they, do they know how...”
“How long I have left?” Helena sighed and padded the bed with her hand and Bastila slowly slipped across to sit next to her. She took her daughter’s hand and squeezed it tightly. “A few weeks, dear. But that’s enough for you and me to say everything we need to. You know how proud I am, especially of your choice of young man.”
Bastila looked at her mother in surprise and smiled sadly. “I never could hide anything from you, could I? Even as a child you always knew when I’d been up to no good. How did you know Revan was my... that he and I...”
“Because, Bass, someone told her,” Revan said quietly, watching as she span on the bed to look at him with shock. He felt her delight at seeing him flow down the bond, mingled with reluctance and apprehension. “I missed you at the party and I missed you when I came here. Why'd you leave me on Lehon?”
“I... how did you find? Th... this is a personal matter. I... I didn’t think you'd want to be with me while I visited Mother. It’s not going to be a happy time around here and you’ve seen enough sadness for a lifetime,” she lied to him, hoped he would accept it. But, she watched as his eyes narrowed, he knew; the bond between them exposed any lie for what it was. “I also have… other matters to attend to. Important ones.”
She looked away from Revan and closed her eyes. ‘Please don't ask what, please... I have to do this alone, I have to!' she thought, feeling his reluctance. And also... something else, determination over something he knew. He couldn’t know what she was going to do... did he? She looked into his soft eyes and, swallowed by the force he was imposing when he looked at her like that, looked into her soul. She snorted at her own words, nothing there but darkness and guilt now, but still he watched her with those dark eyes and, secretly, she wanted him to.
“Mother, I suppose you know now then that Revan and myself we...” she paused, thinking of a way to explain it that wouldn't sound silly, turning to her mother as she did so. Helena’s face, however, was fixed on the glass door to her room. Bastila looked around to see a young man, face sweating, pressed against the glass. He held an archaic paper envelope in one hand and looked apprehensively at them all. Revan frowned and then his eyes widened in understanding.
Walking quickly, he pulled the door open and shook his head. “Damn it, HK! Let him go.”
“Statement: Master, this meatbag claims to have a message for you. When I asked him to give it to me, he became quite insistent that he should deliver it by hand. When I asked him to wait until I could ask you for instructions, he attempted to force his way past me. I calculate a five percent chance he is a Sith assassin and the envelope is a small bomb. May I have your permission to vaporize him?'
“No, let him go!” Revan snapped, looking at the messenger’s panicked face. “Your job is a bodyguard now. That means you keep them out, politely! It doesn’t mean slapping them against the door like a criminal.”
“Supplication: Sorry, Master, I shall release him at once. But,” HK let go of the man, who gasped a bit and glared at the droid, until HK looked down, his red eyes flashing, “I think he should know that have my eyes on him, just in case!”
The messenger cleared his throat and stood up, brushing himself down as he did so. Ignoring the threatening red droid next to him, he turned to the mildly amused Helena and Bastila inside the room.
“Knight Bastila Shan?” he asked pointedly. She nodded and he held out the envelope. “You are to come to the Jedi Council in the next two hours. Your... mistake and its consequences will be discussed at that time. However, they would like you to be aware that this meeting is quite unusual and will require further deliberation on your part.”
Bastila held the envelope gently, but made no move to open it. The messenger nodded, and turning to avoid the looming droid walked quickly out. Helena looked at her daughter with puzzled eyes and she opened her mouth, a question forming on her lips. Bastila however, spoke before she could say anything.
“Mother, I... I have to go and see them.” She turned and smiled at her, and Helena saw the slight tinge of fear and regret in her eyes but chose to say nothing. “I'm sure it’ll be quick and when I come back I’ll have plenty of time to spend with you.”
Revan watched quietly and knew exactly what she meant by that last sentence. Shaking his head, he moved back inside. He had to get ready as well, Vandar had arranged everything, and it was up to him to stop a terrible mistake, no matter how well intentioned.
“Well, I’ve got to go and see the others, they’re going over the Hawk.” Bastila blushed and he smiled at Helena. “I’ll go and give them a hand and leave you two to whatever you were doing. Oh Bastila, I hope ‘'ll see you back on board before dinner? I’ve heard good things about an Ithorian restaurant and thought I'd take you there.”
Bastila blushed again, at her mother’s delighted grin, and fiddling with her lightsaber nodded. Helena’s smile faded as she looked at her daughter and looking up at Revan, cast a searching glance at him. 'What's going on?' she urged, the summons to the Council had disturbed her greatly.
He held up a hand in supplication and shook his head slowly at her. Helena frowned, and then reluctantly nodded at him.
“Well, I’ve got to go. See you later, Bastila...” He paused at the door and looked back at her. “I love you.”
Bastila blushed and looked up. She could feel his concern for her and with an inward sigh, made an effort to calm it. Even as she looked at him, Bastila felt her mother watching them, bad enough she knew they were an item. The last thing she’d wanted was for her mother to realize just how much she needed Revan, unsure if she’d approve. With a sigh, she looked up at him and murmured, “I love you too Revan, I... I’ll see you later on at the Hawk and we can...we can talk about our future, if you like.”
He nodded and walked out of the room, feeling Bastila’s eyes follow him out the door. Her guilt and sorrow had been assaulting him while she had talked, doubling in strength when the summons to the Council had been given. Coupled with his own it was almost... almost... No, he had to help her! He had to keep his own problems under control. He had. For a second, he felt his own guilt and despair threaten to overwhelm him. Struggling, he swayed against the wall of the hospital and felt dizzy.
“Statement: Master, are you all right?”
HK watched as Revan groaned and clutched his head. HK’s sensors picked up massive stress levels and he worried for his master. Unable to assist, medical info not being programmed into his database, HK stood helplessly on guard as Revan shivered against the wall. “No! I... I can handle this! I can!” he whispered as terrible feeling of worthlessness ripped through him. “For her, for Bastila I have to... Peace, there is peace! I am Revan. I’m not a puppet... I... I…”
Carth’s face looking concerned and suspicious. “I don't know how you keep going, this must be an even bigger shock to you than it is to us.”
Bastila, guilt and pain in her voice as he struggled to face the truth. “We had no choice, your mind was too badly damaged.”
Her terrible beauty, as she stood there anger bubbling inside her. “I have pledged myself to Malak and the dark side.”
A cruel grin that tore at him. "I could never love anyone as weak as you.”
“No, I have to hold on... I...” He concentrated. “There is no chaos, there is harmony.”
“Nothing..." He shivered and his Jedi controls slipped back in place. Slowly, he began to feel better as they clamped down. He had to help Bastila and then, maybe then he could deal with his own problems, before they destroyed him. “Come on... we have things to do.”
“Confirmation: Yes, Master.”
The Council would meet with the both of them, whether Bastila wanted them to or not.
Emotion, yet peace. |
Ignorance, yet knowledge.
Passion, yet serenity.
Chaos, yet harmony.
Death, yet the Force.
|...bman999||Jul 3 2010, 03:10 AM Post #7|
|This does look really good. The idea's a good one, and it'll be nice to see a well-done continuation of the story we all know and love. Don't have time to read this now, but once I'm back from vacation I will. I'm really looking forward to how this guy depicts the characters and stuff, though, as well as your own additions to the story, Striker!|
|"Peace cannot be kept by force. It can only be achieved by understanding." -Albert Einstein|
|Jedi Striker||Aug 25 2011, 11:36 PM Post #8|
Chapter 2: Regrets and Conspiracies
Coruscant, the Jedi Council's Temple spire
Bastila looked up at the vastly tall spire of the Jedi Temple on Coruscant. She had never actually been here before; she’d been too vital to the war effort and so had been kept busy on the front or guarded at Dantooine, where they could deploy her at a moments notice.
The spire stretched to the clear blue-sky, gleaming with a brilliant white in the warm sun. The grounds were flush with various green leafy plants, soft blooms and light scents. Fountains cascaded clear blue water into shallow bowls with a gentle platter. Bastila sighed; she wished she could stay out here for a little longer and absorb the peace of the gardens. Around her, Jedi of various skill and ages wandered around, going about their business. Despite the obvious, yet quiet, bustle of the grounds, Bastila felt many eyes light on her in recognition. She wondered if it was due to her history of Battle Meditation and the lives she'd saved, the “death” of Darth Revan or now the fact that she'd fallen to the dark side and had been redeemed by the man she'd set out to vanquish.
Looking back up at the Temple spire, Bastila felt a brief wave of anxiety at what awaited her at its tip. The surrounding Temple grounds smelt fresh and the calming sound of water helped her relax however and she blew out a breath.
What happens, happens. I will accept the Council's will. She paused and sighed slightly. Whatever that may be and despite how Revan may feel about it...
Composed, Bastila walked gently up the steps towards the Republic guards at the main entrance. As she approached, one of the guards looked up and straightened to a parade stance. “Yes, Master Jedi. May I help you?”
Bastila handed across the envelope wordlessly and with it the summons to the Council. The guard read the letter inside and looked up at her with a smile.
“Ah, yes. Well, the Council hasn't convened yet. They asked all those requested to come to this meeting that they wait in conference room two. The other two have arrived before you, Master Jedi, and are also waiting there for them.”
Bastila frowned and looked questioningly at him. “What others? I assumed that they wanted to see my on my own.”
“I wouldn't know, Master Jedi. I'm not privy to why they ask people to come to the council. I was informed to direct all people coming for this meeting, to conference room two. Sorry, ma'am.”
“It's no problem, really. Thank you for the directions.”
Stepping up, she walked into the Temple’s main foyer and glanced around, impressed by what she saw. The hallway was lined with massive pillars, each supporting a high roof in which large plastiglass windows allowed pools of light to splash on the rich red carpet. It was certainly different to the more simple surroundings of Dantooine, she thought. Various Jedi walked wandered the halls, each with their own purpose, and Bastila joined them without pause, ignoring the occasional double take of some Jedi. Walking across the huge hallway, she moved to a directions map and examined it carefully. Conference room two was on the fifth floor of the Temple spire and she took a turbolift to reach it. Walking down a corridor upon its stop at the top of the main spire, she found the doorway and looked at it. The door to conference room two was neatly inset smoked plastiglass and as she stepped up to the door she noticed two blurred figures moving around inside. Taking a deep breath, Bastila opened the door.
“Hey! Look who it is! Long time no see, Bastila.” Mission waved at her from the corner of the room, where she was investigating a food synthesiser. “It's not too bad here. Nice décor and the caffa ain't too bad.”
Bastila looked at her in shock and turned as the bond suddenly twitched with amusement. Revan sat on a soft sofa on the other side of the room, watching Mission’s fiddling with the synthesiser with a smile. He looked up at her and winked.
“She wanted to come with me, and seems to think a non-Jedi should be with us.”
Bastila looked at him and felt the shock at his presence give way to annoyance. She placed her hands on her hips and her annoyance with him grew as he groaned, recognizing her posture, feeling her irritation.
“Why are you here?” she asked and before he could speak, snapped. “I do not need a chaperone! I can do the occasional thing myself, you know. Just because you... we are, are bonded... does not mean you can follow me around all the time.”
Revan watched her finish ranting and stare at him. He opened his mouth. “I'll admit that I know why you're here, Bass.” She looked at him angrily and he held up a hand. “I'm also here at the Council’s request though. They need to talk to me about a few things that happened on and before the Forge. I would have preferred, however, that you had told me that they wanted to see you, rather than overhear you and Vrook by accident.”
She frowned and slid onto the sofa. “I... had to do this myself. You didn't need to be here, not for me. I would have come back to you, you know that, right?” she muttered, trying to lie to him again; knew that he would do everything possible to dissuade her. “I have to answer for what I did, you do understand that?'”
He opened his mouth to answer and she felt his reluctance to agree. Before he could speak however, the door slid open once more and two female Jedi gracefully walked in.
“Bastila Shan?” Bastila nodded and getting up bowed to the two of them. The female Jedi on the left looked at Revan who'd remained sat on the sofa. “Jedi Knight Revan? You are both to accompany us to the Council chambers.”
Revan got up for the sofa and nodded. He looked across at Mission who pulled herself away from the wall and moved to come with them. The female Jedi who had addressed Bastila held up her hand.
“I'm afraid this is not for non-Jedi. Please, remain here and help yourself to refreshments while your colleagues are in the chamber.” Mission looked at Revan who shrugged at her, resigned. “Jedi Revan? Please come with us, you need to wear the robe adornments of Honor Bearer if you wish to stand with Bastila Shan.”
Bastila looked at him, her head snapping round, and she narrowed her eyes. Now she could feel him she knew... he was here for her. Annoyed, she turned, pushing his feeling of regret away as he tried to apologize through the bond.
Revan, upset and trying to hide it, looked at the two Jedi and nodded at them. As they left the room, Bastila walked through the door, nudging past him roughly and paying little heed to his look of regret. He sighed, turned and followed them.
The Council chamber was at the tip of the main spire of the temple complex. It looked out across a large portion of Coruscant, a gorgeous view. The sun, bright that afternoon, shone through the roof to floor windows placed to allow the view to be just so admired. Arranged in the circular room, the Council members of Coruscant looked up as Bastila walked into the centre. She stood, glanced around, and bowed deeply... it was time.
“Masters of the Council. I have answered your summons. I will abide by the will of the Council in all things, no matter the cost.”
She pulled herself up out of the bow and looked surreptitiously round the room. Most of the Masters surrounding her she didn't know. One chair made her double take, for at first she thought Vandar had come to the Council as well as Revan, but she realized that the face was different. The small alien looked up at her and smiled softly, his fingers pursed in thoughtfulness.
“Ah, Bastila. Finally we get to meet the Jedi who defeated Revan and helped to turn him to the light side of the force, as well as providing your unique Battle Meditation to the Republic's war effort. It is a great honor, Bastila.”
She blushed and a feeling of awkwardness slipped over her. The small Jedi must know why she was here, but he obviously wanted to get off on the right foot. She shrugged; it paid to be polite. “Thank you, Master…?” She paused not knowing his name and the small alien smiled. He waved a hand around the room.
“I am Master Vreik, current Grand Master of our Jedi Order. To the left and right of me is Master of the Council Nomi Sunrider,” an old, yet attractive, woman nodded with a smile, “and Master Hieruk,” an Ithorian inclined his head. “The other Jedi are all Council members, I'm sure you will be introduced to them each, sooner of later.'
Bastila nodded and cast a glance around the room once more. All of the Masters seemed calm and composed except for one woman who glowered at her silently from a chair nearest the door. Vrieik watched her quietly as she looked around and once her attention slid back to him, laced his fingers once more.
“Do you know why the Council has summoned you, young Padawan?' His face never left hers and she felt a brief feeling of apprehension. Clamping down with her emotional control, Bastila nodded. “Please do tell us then, it is good to know why Jedi think we have asked them to come.”
“I presume, Master, that you have asked me here to deal with my arrogance and stupidity, my failure as a Jedi and my fall to the dark side. I... I understand from the archives that Jedi in the past have been, corrected, when such an occurrence has happened.” She looked around to see if Revan had appeared. She had to do it fast if he had, faster if he hadn't. Not seeing him there, she quickly bowed in an old form of supplication. “I am willing to face any punishment you deem fit.”
The old Master frowned in surprise as he looked at her. Bastila wondered if he could feel the guilt in her. But its source is not what she did to herself... because of something she did to someone, her betrayal of someone else.... He watched, as she slowly looked up, puzzled that he had not spoken. He cleared his throat.
“Punishment, young Bastila? The Council called you here to answer questions, yes. But we see no need to punish you for something you could not have stopped.” Her face twisted slightly with emotion, relief followed by a... need. “All we want is to ask you questions, about you and your conduct with Revan. I understand he has asked to be your Honor Bearer, something that has not occurred for many years in the Council. Would you care to explain why?”
Bastila opened her mouth to answer but was cut off by another voice. “'I am more interested in Master Vrook's report. Bastila Shan seems to think the Jedi Code does not apply to her and Revan it seems. I would like her to explain how she can be a Jedi and fall in love with the so called ‘redeemed Lord of the Sith’!”
Vreik looked across, as did she and the majority of the council members, to the angry woman in the adjacent door seat. He sighed, recognizing her face and glared sternly at her. “The Council does not recognize Master Telan at this time. I ask that you wait until I have asked my questions before posing any of your own.”
He settled back and looked at Bastila. She was obviously confused, embarrassed that they knew about her relationship and, now, unsure of why she had been summoned.
“You are right in that the Council has called you to Coruscant in order to ask about your fall to the dark side. However, we feel you should know that no punishment has been assigned to you, nor any blame.” He watched as she opened her mouth to protest and quickly continued. “We merely wish to hear, in your own words... and now those of your Honor Bearer, as to why you fell to the dark side.”
Bastila looked in shock at the old Jedi Master and felt parts of her begin to crumble. She’d been convinced that they would discipline her, why else summon her to the council on Coruscant? She had been expecting it... almost needed it. As she struggled to cope with her own feelings, a familiar presence slipped into place next to her. Revan, sweating slightly in a set of archaic velveteen robes, looked at her with a smile and winked in supplication. She frowned, her temper rising; had he done this?
“Ah, Revan. I see you've managed to appear here at last.” Vriek smiled at him, noting the sheen of perspiration on the young Jedi’s face. “Would you like to remove the robes of Honor Bearer? As much as we stand on ceremony, and as much as my aides have followed Jedi tradition, it is rather warm in here.”
With a grateful nod, Revan gently removed the velvet robe he wore and handed it to a young Padawan standing to one side. Underneath, the Star Forge robes he had worn while defeating Malak glimmered in the light.
“Thank you, Master, it was getting a trifle warm.”
“Now,” Vriek said looking at Revan with interest, “Master Vandar sent the message asking for you to be Bastila's Honor Bearer. Usually something done only for those Jedi who are incapable of handling their own defense, something Bastila seems more than capable of doing.”
Revan looked across at Bastila and felt a twinge of anger slip past her emotional control, aimed for him. He looked away and reinforced his own emotional defenses. Although she would be annoyed, even hate him if he did this, he couldn't let her punish herself for something he was responsible for. Even... even if it cost him the one thing keeping him going.
“Master Vandar agreed that Bastila may not,” he looked at her and felt even more guilt seep into him, “may not be... sufficiently objective, when it comes to the matter of her fall to the dark side. I asked him if it would be possible to come and shoulder some of the burden.”
Bastila looked at him, her mouth slipping open. He had planned to be here, had planned to be her Honor Bearer and she felt her anger at him grow. He had no right to stop her from submitting to the Council for her own peace of mind. She’d fallen to the dark side and had reveled in it. What right did he have to try and stop her? Vriek looked across, sensing her anger and possibly the reasons for it. Turning to Revan, he cocked his head.
“We have heard from Vandar about this matter, but now we would like to hear both Bastila's and your version of what happened.” He looked across at Bastila who blushed at his knowing stare. “Only after we have heard about your fall from you and Revan, Bastila, will we decide if any punishment, and what it will be, is deserved.”
“I... you…” She looked at Vreik and sighing, bowed once more. This was a mistake, she was guilty of so much, but she would abide by their decision. “I understand, Master Vriek, I apologize for this unforeseen event. I had hoped not to waste too much of the Council’s time.”
“This is no waste, young Padawan, especially if Revan and Master Vandar feel it needs to be done.” Vreik watched Revan glance at Bastila and could feel his anxiety over her response. With a sigh, he looked back. “Bastila, please tell us what happened on the Leviathan; I presume that is a good place to start, yes?'
Bastila took a deep breath and steeling herself began to speak, quietly and clearly. “We were apprehended by Admiral Saul Karath after a hyperspace jump towards the planet with the final Star Map. He managed to overwhelm us and, once onboard the Leviathan, tortured me in order to extract information from Revan.”
“Why you?” Master Sunrider asked quietly, looking at Bastila with gentle eyes. “I mean, if he needed to extract information from Revan, why torture you to gain it?”
Bastila looked at the old Master with a frown. If Master Telan knew that it was due to Revan's love for her, then Sunrider must know as well. Why did she want to hear it spoken by her? With a mental shrug, she looked at the old Master.
“Because, Master Sunrider, Saul knew that Revan and myself even then were in love with one another.” She sighed and glanced over at Revan, her annoyance with him still rankled but she knew she couldn't live without him. “I regret that it gave him a pressure point to use against Revan, one he used as much as possible.”
“Regret? You endangered the whole mission with your... infatuation. The code is not something you can pick up and drop at will, Bastila Shan!”
Bastila looked at Telan and saw with surprise the scowl she wore. She wondered what it was that made the Councilwoman so angry towards her, even as Vreik sighed once, loudly.
“Master Telan! I will not remind you again.”
“Her emotional involvement could have meant the destruction of the Republic, if Karath had managed to pull any information from Revan it could have meant...”
“That did not happen, Master Telan,” the smooth female voice of Sunrider interrupted. “I apologize, Master Vreik, for bringing this up. I merely wanted to satisfy myself about something.”
“And that was?” Telan asked narrowing her eyes at Sunrider, who smiled gently at Bastila's ashamed face.
“Whether this is more than an infatuation. I can see from her eyes that it is.” She looked at Revan and raised her eyebrows at him. “Hmm. I wonder how close you came to telling Saul everything he wanted?”
Revan looked calmly at her, while his heart hammered at the memory. “I understood how vital our mission was,” he answered, without telling her anything.
Vreik cleared his throat and looked at the two Jedi in the centre of the room. “Could we please continue?”
Bastila nodded. “We managed to get free, thanks to one of our team. We fought our way to the bridge and met Karath, who after a prolonged battle, we defeated. Unfortunately, he told Carth Onasi as he lay dying, the truth about Revan. Despite this, we made our way together back to the hanger, and it is there that Malak was waiting.” She paused at the memory of the Dark Lord standing there and a shiver passed across her spine, a legacy of her torture at his hands. “He told Revan who he really was... something that made Revan himself ask me the truth.”
“And you told him?” Vreik asked quietly. She nodded.
“Well, the point of keeping the truth from him, for me at least, became pointless when he knew. I told him. I told him just how involved I'd been in his capture... all of it.” She thought back, to the look or horror and betrayal on his face and felt the guilt rip through her. “He told me that I was no better than the Sith... worse than the Sith.”
“Something I regret,” Revan whispered at her. She ignored him, but felt a tiny trickle of relief slip into her.
“Malak wanted to face Revan on his own, he used the lull while we spoke to concentrate and unleash a massively powerful stasis. I cannot tell you what happened in the time I was frozen, all I know is that when it released us we could hear saber combat on the other side of the blast door.” She paused. The terror she'd felt, the fear, that Revan was being ripped apart by Malak's saber blade was not something they needed to know. “It was Carth who managed to get the door open, he managed to override it, but only temporarily. I... I ran through and saw Revan also frozen. Helpless, or so I thought, and Malak about to kill him.”
Revan watched her face, he knew that she still blamed herself, but the agony on her face made his own guilt yank at him.
“I had to stop him, I had to,” she whispered, the Council forgotten in that small moment before she returned her attention to them. “I foolishly threw my saber at him and it bounced off that armor he wore. All I did was make him angry, but it was enough for him to attack me instead of Revan or Carth.”
Vriek leaned back and, looking at her pained expression of recall sighed. “I know this is painful but what happened is vital for us to know.”
“He... incapacitated me, knew that a few cuts on my arms and legs would paralyze me enough to take me prisoner. He shut the blast door, not anyone else or a malfunction, but him. I see now that I’d done a stupid thing. I risked the mission and gave Malak a terrible weapon to use against Revan. He was the last hope for the Republic, damn it, and I should have been able to hold Malak back!” Her voice was racked with guilt and the Council members shifted uncomfortably. “Anyway, he dragged me back to the Rakatan temple and used torture to turn me to the dark side. He thought I would prove to be Revan's undoing... but he was wrong. Revan was stronger than he, or I, thought. He managed to defeat me at the temple, despite my attempts to seduce him from the light side.”
“He resisted you?” Sunrider asked with a sad smile. “How much of your own heart was in the attempt I wonder?”
Bastila looked at Sunrider and steeling herself, she answered truthfully. “All of it, Master. I thought at the time that the Council would... would take him away from me, force us apart.” She watched as the entire Council shifted uncomfortably and she sighed, “I thought in my twisted thinking, that by turning him to the dark side we could be together forever. Be together as apprentice and lover. He was all that mattered... him, and the power I could gain being his apprentice.”
She heard muttered consternation among some of them, but Vriek merely nodded. “I see. So that leaves just one question left for us to need answered and then we can decide what punishment, if any, you deserve.”
Vreik laced his fingers and looked over them at her. She felt similar interest from the Ithorian and Sunrider. “Why in your message to us did you request to be judged over murder, young Padawan?” Vreik asked quietly and Bastila felt her guilt twist. “What murder are you implying you committed?”
“Murder?” Revan asked in shock and turned to his lover. “What the Force are you talking about?”
Bastila glanced at him and felt her head droop in shame. She should have told him all this back at the Hawk. She should have told him all the terrible things that were ripping at her. Now it was too late, far too late.
“I... When I was being tortured Malak used a variety of methods. Physical, electrical and finally psychological, he seemed to have a rather well developed skill with all.” Bastila smiled sickly and Sunrider's face creased in pain at her tone. “I turned from the light and fell into darkness. My fall was complete only when Malak asked, and I struck down, an innocent woman.”
She finished and looked up at Vreik. He and the other Council members looked concerned, and some dismayed, at what she had admitted. Sunrider watched her face and Bastila felt heat rush to her cheeks, she knew that she wasn't telling them everything.
“I see. Well, Bastila, you know that the taking off innocent life is a terrible crime. I presume this is what you wished the Council to discipline you for?”
Bastila nodded and was about to kneel in readiness for her judgment when she felt Revan stride, determined, next to her. She wondered what he was doing, he had no knowledge of what she’d done there and so anything he could say would be futile. She needed to be punished, needed to release this guilt.
Revan looked down at her with compassion, his soul mate needed to release the guilt she was feeling, but not this way. It was time for him to stop this madness. He faced Vriek. “Master, it's time for Bastila's Honor Bearer to speak.”
Vreik nodded and looked at Bastila. She was already half kneeled in supplication, and now stared up at Revan with shocked curiosity.
“While I agree with Bastila about events on the Leviathan, I cannot agree with her description of her torture at Malak's hands. I agree that it was brutal, and extremely effective.” He looked down at her and felt his heart flutter. “I also say that the fact that she managed to resist the dark side for so long is testament to her commitment to the light side. However, I cannot let Bastila sacrifice herself for punishment, no matter how much guilt she feels.”
Vreik nodded. “This is all very well and good, young Jedi, but the Council cannot condone Bastila's murder of an innocent.” He looked down at her. “No matter the circumstances surrounding it. While we do not support discipline, it may be necessary in this case.”
“Master Vriek, I agree in principle, but Bastila has not told the whole truth to the Council in this matter. I cannot explain why, except that it may be to alleviate the guilt she feels over her fall to the dark side itself, more than anything else.” Bastila stared at him in horror; she could feel her punishment... something that could reduce the guilt, wash it away, beginning to slip away. “The truth of the ‘murder’ is that Bastila struck down the woman who had been instrumental in torturing her, something she failed to mention. While she was unarmed, she was definitely not an innocent and she was a member of the Sith.”
Bastila stood up, her face a picture of betrayal and confusion. “How do you know what happened? You weren't there...You weren't there, when I needed you,” she whispered quietly, so only he could hear. Revan shivered; he felt like she’d hit him with a hammer.
Vreik cleared his throat and the two young Jedi looked at him. “How, may I ask, do you know that Bastila's ‘innocent’ victim was actually the torturer?”
Revan looked at Bastila for just a second and then closed his eyes. What he was about to say would probably anger her, but he had to tell the council, he must. “Because, Master, I have seen it.” He watched Bastila's face crease for a few seconds and then her eyes widen in understanding. She looked at him and he could feel her sudden anger slam into him down the bond. “The bond she and I share allow us to do many things. One of these is the ability to share memories and... dreams.”
“You stole into my mind?” Bastila blurted out, all embarrassment forgotten. “Who the Force do you think you are?!”
“Someone who loves you, and won't let you sacrifice yourself over something you couldn't prevent!” he whispered quietly at her. She paused in her ranting, struggling as her own various emotions slammed around inside her, bouncing off her emotional control. Revan turned to Vreik once more. “With this ability I was able to see a nightmare Bastila was having, the focus of which, was the woman she killed.”
Vreik looked at Sunrider who imperceptibly pressed her lips together in thought. With a frown on his wizened face, he looked back at the two Jedi standing before him. “This information brings a whole new perspective to the events you wished us to discuss, Padawan Shan.” She looked around at him, her eyes wild. “The Council will require time to decide what will happen. Please, we ask that you wait back in the conference room with your companion... Mission is her name, yes? Revan, please remain, we need to ask you a few questions and I understand you wish to ask us some as well.”
“Yes, Master, I do. Thank you,” he said quietly, his eyes never wandering from Bastila's face, from the shocked anger rippling in her eyes. Vreik watched them for a few seconds and then cleared his throat.
She looked at him and opened her mouth. “You can't... I mean he doesn't,” she paused and a feeling of defeat swept over her. “I... I will return to the conference room, Master, but I...”
“Thank you, Padawan, the Council will discuss this now,” Vreik reaffirmed gently.
With a sigh of defeat, Bastila slowly walked towards the door, glancing angrily at Revan as she did so. I want to talk to you Revan. You and I have much to discuss! she thought down the bond at him.
I know, he sent back. I know you're angry Bastila but try to calm down. I'll be back soon.
Bastila walked quietly, and with dignity, out of the Council room. Revan sighed with relief, even though her anger at him flowed down the bond, into him, like liquid fire. The effort to control his own emotional baggage was becoming harder, but he had enough control at that moment to push away and ignore the assault from Bastila's own fluctuating emotional state.
Emotion, yet peace. |
Ignorance, yet knowledge.
Passion, yet serenity.
Chaos, yet harmony.
Death, yet the Force.
|Jedi Striker||Aug 25 2011, 11:37 PM Post #9|
“So, Revan, I understand that the so called ‘Prodigal Knight’ has questions for the Council,” Telan snapped from her seat, as soon as the click of the door echoed in the chamber. “We have many for you as well. The first is: what the Force you were thinking when you fell in love with Bastila? You know the Code as well as she! Emotion, especially love, cannot be allowed for us Jedi!”
Revan looked at Telan with disdain. He felt the Council's own discomfort with the Jedi Master but also with him as well. Vreik opened his mouth and Revan heard the resignation in his voice. “Master Telan, for the last time I will not...”
“Master Vreik?” Revan interrupted and the old master turned to him with a raised eyebrow. “If you will permit me, I am quite happy to answer Master Telan's question.”
Vreik nodded and settled back into the chair; despite himself, he too was interested. Revan cleared his throat and turned to Telan with a calm expression.
“I did not ask to fall for Bastila, Master Telan. When we first met I have to say she was one of the most irritating and self-opinionated people I’d ever met. However, it was the bond between us – the recognition of it as we trained as Jedi – that changed my opinion.” He paused and smiled in memory. “She was so helpful to me during those difficult times and also so honest. I couldn’t help it. The bond pulled us close, closer than I ever thought was possible and I... I found myself thinking about her all the time. She was so wonderful, so easy to irritate, so compassionate. Despite her arrogance, something I realize was to protect herself from me, I could feel her... her soul through the bond we share. Despite her own self control, she felt it too and, well, it seemed that the Force wanted it.”
Telan sat back in shock. “The Force? You think that the Force desired you and Bastila to become lovers?” She snorted and waved a hand around the room. “See? What arrogance! To think that the force would bring two such powerful Jedi together, so that they could fall in love.”
Revan frowned and felt his ire grow at her scornful tone. About to snap back at her, he was surprised to hear a soft female voice interject.
“Arrogance, Master Telan? There is plenty of that already being shown in this chamber.” Telan rankled at her tone and Sunrider smiled slightly at the Jedi Master. “Once again, you attack Revan and Bastila for falling in love, Telan, but tell me have you ever felt it yourself? Love can be powerful, so very powerful and overwhelming. We cannot forget that it was Revan's love for Bastila that brought her back to the light.”
“And possibly sent her to the dark in the first place,” Telan countered, her voice heated. “She acted rashly, foolishly due to the emotion she was feeling. If she and Revan had not fallen in love with one another, Bastila could have acted to the situation in a calm and collected manner. As it is, she stupidly sacrificed herself to save him, only to give Malak our most powerful weapon, her battle meditation!”
Revan looked at her with distaste and stepped up to the chair she sat in. “Bastila is a person! Not a weapon or a tool you think you own or can use! She has been through hell and back to do what you asked her, lied to the person she loved and submitted to the most terrible tortures Malak could probably conceive. I would remind you, Telan, that she has as much right to her own feelings as you obviously do.”
“How dare you!” she snapped at him, even as he struggled to pull his anger back, the other Council members flinching at the raw emotion swirling around the chamber. Vreik opened his mouth to restore calm, but Sunrider gently placed a hand on his shoulder and shook her head. “You would do well to remember where you are, young Jedi! I am a Master of the Council and I will not be spoken to in that manner!”
Revan felt all the anger he’d bottled upon finding out that the Council had wiped his mind, claw at his emotional controls. It came so close, so very close to breaching them, but he fought back. His body shivered slightly under the strain and he rolled his jaw easing the tension. With a deep breath, he stood back, and centered himself. The effect soothed and healed the fractures in his barrier. But, for a fleeting second, he felt Bastila suddenly touch his mind in concern. He slipped defenses in her path and her searching mind slipped back empty handed.
“You, and for that fact the entire Council, are fine people to lecture me on what I should or should not do,” he said in a chill voice, obviously controlled tightly. “After all we've been through together, you actually think I care if you will permit me to remain with Bastila or not? I love her and there's nothing you could do or say to stop me being with her!”
“We could split you up, and move you to separate areas of our control!” Telan said, tilting her head as he flinched slightly. “I would very much like to do this actually, and we do not need more difficulties at the moment with disobedient Jedi.”
“If you do that,” Revan said quietly, looking at her. “It will destroy Bastila, and me too. If you even suggest that again,” he turned to the entire Council and his face was hard, “I will reject everything you have tried to teach me and leave – with Bastila, if she desires it!”
“Revan, we have no desire at this time to prevent your union with young Bastila.” Telan opened her mouth, but Vreik held up a hand sharply; he had to defuse this situation and fast. “Telan, you do not dictate policy of the Council. It will be decided in due course, however.”
Revan breathed a sigh of relief and Telan snorted.
With a sigh, Vreik addressed the council. “We cannot ignore what Master Sunrider has openly stated. Despite the Code, the only thing that saved Bastila from the dark side was the love she had for Revan, it brought her back despite Malak's influence. The ways of the Force are mysterious, even to one as old as I. I will not be one to interfere with any plan that it has for Revan or Bastila. The other Council members would do well to heed me.”
Telan scowled and sat back in her chair, radiating disapproval as the others nodded. Revan sighed inwardly with relief and looked at Vreik with a penitent smile.
“Now, if you have finished, may I ask a question?” he asked, looking around the room. Vreik nodded and Revan cleared his throat. “Here we go...”
“I would like to ask the Council about the Force discipline used to erase Revan’s personality and memory from my mind.”
Master Hieruk shifted in his chair and tilted his head at Revan.
“We did not do any such thing, Jedi Revan. The Council on Dantooine made the choice. We have no knowledge of the rite they used to perform such an act.”
Revan sighed and looked at him. He could feel the tender ground he trod on. The Council would probably see any desire to find out about the Revan he used to be as a bad sign. With a deeper sigh, he soldiered on – he had to know.
“Masters of the Council, I realize that it was Dantooine's Council that decided to wipe my mind. However, I can also make the logical assumption that it wasn't taken without consulting you first. I know you must have had a hand in the decision.” He watched as a few of them looked at each other, slight signs of guilt passing across their faces. “I’ve no desire to lay blame, in fact I don't care at all who made the choice. All I want is to find out who I was before I fell to the dark side.”
Vreik looked at him and shook his head.
“You want more than that, young Knight, I can tell. What is it you are not telling us?”
Pausing, Revan looked at the tiny Master in front of him. What he wanted tore at him, as much as the guilt and pain of what he had once been did. He cleared his throat, suddenly nervous.
“Malak called me a puppet. Something that the Council created to control and use to their advantage.” He felt the pain of what he was saying, trickle into the bond, and fought to stop Bastila feeling anything. “I want to know how much truth is in what he told me. Master Vandar told me that it’s amazing I even stand before you today. He said that I should be a vegetable, just capable of feeding myself and walking around.”
Sunrider glanced at Vreik who remained staring at Revan intently.
“If that’s the case then why did my mind fix itself? If it didn’t, then what did? Where did ‘who I am’ come from? I know that they gave me a past, gave me a history that could fit in to anything anyone asked me.” He looked around and the pain and despair slipped in to his voice. “But who am I? What am I? Please, if you know anything, I ask you to help me!”
Hieruk looked at Revan and sighed, his deep voice resonating around the chamber.
“I have been a friend of Master Dorak for many years,” he said quietly. “The rite that they used to focus the Force to heal your damaged mind, to erase the taint of Lord Revan is ancient. I am sure Master Vandar explained that the holocron describing what it actually did is lost.”
“So the vast archives, even here, are useless to me?”
”I am afraid so. While we can, and will, give you information about who you used to be and I can also provide you with information on the rite used to heal and erase your mind, how it managed to do this is lost to us. I am sorry.”
“Why did you use it in the first place if you know so little about it?” he asked quietly, knowing the answer.
“Because we had no other choice,” Sunrider responded, as quietly as he had posed the question. “We were losing people all over the galaxy. Your past self had huge fleets of ships and the tactical skill to employ them. So when Bastila saved your broken body, we had a desperate chance to use the knowledge you carried to our advantage.”
“I know all about how she saved my life!” he muttered, opening his eyes and looking at her. “The memories, that’s another thing I need answers to! If you erased my mind, how come I get memory flashes of my past? Dreams that I wake screaming from? Why can I sometimes feel Lord Revan almost looking over my shoulder? Even Jolee said I was unfocused, as though darkness hung over me! What am I?” The question ripped itself from him, despite his best efforts.
“We don't know and we cannot help you,” Vreik answered softly, his eyes a mirror of Revan's pain.”'I am so very sorry, Revan, but it is as Master Vandar said. We on Coruscant have no answers for you.”
Revan felt sick and closed his eyes as total despair swept through him. Sunrider watched him from her chair and felt only compassion for the redeemed Sith Lord standing before her. He hadn’t asked for any of this. To find out he had been the leader of the brutal enemy they now fought must have shattered everything he'd believed in. Now, with Bastila the only thing keeping him going, all the Council’s vast knowledge was absolutely useless. She sighed and Revan looked at her.
“I, for one, wish to apologize, young Knight.” Surprised faces peered at her from around the room. “For all you once did as the Dark Lord Revan, it’s obvious you aren’t him anymore. We did a terrible thing when we advised you should not be told who you were. That was wrong and it put you and Bastila in terrible danger, both from yourself when you found the truth and her guilt at keeping this secret that helped Malak turn her.”
Revan shuffled slightly in the middle of the Council chamber and looked at her with a weak smile. “I suppose that I'm back to square one then.” He laughed slightly, but there was no amusement in it. “So what do I do now?”
“Wait for the Council to decide what to do with you, as all Jedi do!” Telan said gruffly, and Revan looked at her, eyes flashing.
“Who said I want to remain a Jedi?” he asked and a ripple shot through the Council, followed by a groan from the majority. “I did what you really wanted: I destroyed the Star Forge, killed Malak…. I've ‘paid’ for my new life! The Council on Dantooine... you as well... cannot escape that what you did could be considered an injustice. You should have let her tell me, as soon as I woke up! What reason can you possibly give for me to stay?”
“Revan...” Sunrider began and he looked at her. “You've proved yourself as a force of good and the Jedi need you right now. You know as well as we do, that the battle with the Sith is far from over. Please, we need you.”
“I know,” he sighed. “But what the Council did...”
“Vandar and the others did it for the greater good; please try to understand, to forgive. It was an injustice to you but a necessary one. Let us prove to you that the Council does things for good.”
“I find it hard to believe anything the Council says,” Revan muttered and Sunrider winced at his bitter tone. A sudden thought struck him and he looked up. “If you really want me to stay as a Jedi, I need a favor.”
“Favor?” Vreik asked and he swapped a glance with Sunrider and Hieruk. “What would that be?”
Revan told them and the Council leaders glanced at each other.
“We can do that, I think,” Sunrider said. “It’s a lot of money though, but if it helps you forgive our Order... shows our appreciation for all you’ve done...”
“Thank you, Masters.” Revan looked around the room. “It does mean a lot to me. She, as you know, means a lot to me.”
“I'm sure. Now, please return to the conference room. We need to discuss a few things.” Vreik looked around the Council and sighed. “We will call Bastila and yourself back once we have decided what to do. This could take a while, so please be patient.”
Dejected by the lack of answers, Revan slowly walked out of the Council chamber. He needed to talk to someone, but the one person he could had shut him out. With a sigh, he walked slowly back to the conference chamber. He had to patch things up with Bastila, before he couldn't hold on anymore.
Emotion, yet peace. |
Ignorance, yet knowledge.
Passion, yet serenity.
Chaos, yet harmony.
Death, yet the Force.
|Jedi Striker||Aug 25 2011, 11:37 PM Post #10|
Vreik waited for a few seconds after the door slid quietly shut behind him and turned to the other council members. “It seems Vandar is correct; Revan is a totally different person... very interesting.”
“How do we know that?” Telan snorted. “He could be lying, wants to corrupt us from the inside.” Many Masters looked at her with contempt but she continued, oblivious. “Look at Bastila, how can she be in love with someone like that? Someone who wiped planets from the galaxy! How do we know he isn't controlling her?”
“Don't be ridiculous!” Sunrider snapped. “We need to only look at all the good things he did before leaving to find the Star Maps to see he’s changed. Lord Revan would never have bothered with the Sandral and Matale feud, or taken on the Mandalorian raiders’ leader. Plus, he did save Bastila from the dark side, when he loved her too. I wonder how tempting it was for him to join her in the darkness? Even with her passion attempting to corrupt him, he pulled her back to the light, knowing that he ran the risk of we, the Council, splitting them forever! Now he wants us to help him find his place. That’s not the work of a dark Sith Lord to me!”
“Plus, we must take into consideration the fact that he did destroy the Star Forge and Malak,” Vreik said quietly, looking at his hands. “Without him, even Admiral Dodonna has admitted that Bastila would have wiped them out. Besides, we need him now, more than ever. Although weakened, the Sith are still fighting. They have more resources than we or the Republic have available at this time.” He paused and looked round the Council. “We need Revan and Bastila together, and we need them at the peak of their abilities.”
“You intend to go against the Senate then Master Vreik?” Telan asked in shock. “You know as well as I that half the house have demanded Revan be put on trial for the war crimes he committed before we erased his mind!”
“While the other half sees him as a figurehead for the fight, a redeemed Jedi who vanquished Malak,” Sunrider argued softly. “Master Vreik is right, Telan, even you can see that. Bastila and Revan are needed terribly right now. The Sith 6th fleet is beginning to assemble to assault the Tangelos Tabana gas mines. We need Bastila's battle meditation to swing the battle, but she can’t do that if we arrest Revan and lock him away. It’ll devastate her.”
Looking around she cleared her throat. “We all, I know, felt Bastila’s pain and guilt. It was terrible and the only thing keeping her going, even if she knows it or not, is Revan’s strength, his love...” She paused and looked at Vriek, his face thoughtful once more. “She will need him if she is to vanquish the pain left inside, to find a way to cope.”
“I still say it's a bad idea!” Telan muttered. “Two Jedi, of such power and in love is dangerous.”
Sunrider sighed and Telan sat back, her face dark.
“What’s worse is Revan himself,” Sunrider continued, looking around the room and finding the majority of heads nodding in agreement. “We can only guess how he feels about himself right now. A Jedi has powerful emotional control, it is when that control is broken that the danger lies. I don’t know about anyone else, but Revan must be nearing the limits of his ability.”
“What are you talking about?” Telan snapped. “Revan is a puppet, a personality that the council on Dantooine implanted in his mind. I’m sure he has all the emotional control he needs.”
“Really? That’s not what I saw when you attacked him about his involvement with Bastila. He was so close to snapping, Telan, and you’re lucky he managed to rein it back.” Sunrider sighed and looked at the Council with a frown. “He may have a... a history that was imprinted by the Masters on Dantooine but from what I've seen, from what our own chronicler Master Hieruk has told us, we have no idea what personality has been placed there. I worry for his mental stability.”
Sunrider glanced at Vreik and Hieruk with a frown. “He has found that his life is a lie, that we erased his memory and gave him a new past. That he was the Dark lord of the Sith and is responsible for countless acts of terror and evil. To top it all, we do not have the answers he seeks about himself.” She sighed and thought back to the crushing defeat she’d felt from him as he had left the Council chamber. “I don't know how much longer he can keep going, and I only hope Bastila can help him through the difficult times ahead.”
Vreik nodded and Sunrider sat back down. He looked around the room. “Bastila is strong enough I feel to support him, but only if she can rid herself of the guilt she feels over her fall to the dark side. I have to agree with Revan; any blame we assign to Bastila would be wrong. Many more powerful Masters have fallen to the dark side when under the torture of Malak. To punish Bastila, a Padawan who managed to resist him for as long as any of us could, would be a terrible injustice. As for her own self-charge of murder. Considering that it was a Sith torturer, and also that it was Malak's idea to use this against her... I cannot see any reason for us to discipline her over this.”
“Why not?” Telan muttered and the council shifted uneasily.
With a sigh, Vreik laced his fingers once more. “I must also present the practical side to the Council. Bastila is young, but from the evidence of her resistance to Malak's physical and force based torture, coupled with her development of battle meditation, Bastila will be able to harness her power as much as Revan someday. Together, they could be our most powerful force for good.”
“All the more reason to separate them in my opinion, as I've said already,” Telan snapped. “If Revan becomes dangerous, if he loses control of himself as master Sunrider says, worse if he turns to the dark side, we will need Bastila to stop him.”
“I didn't say Revan was mentally unstable as of now!” Sunrider said sharply at Telan. “Just that he needs our support at the moment. Finding out that everything they believe is a lie would shock anyone. All I’m saying is that Revan needs our compassion and, more importantly, Bastila at this time. To separate them at all would be wrong both on a moral and logical standpoint. I will object to any attempt to do so!”
With a sigh Vreik looked around the Council at the other Masters.
“We will now vote on the fate of Bastila, Revan and possibly the Republic. I just hope that the bond between them is as strong as I hope.” He looked at Sunrider who shook her head. “I just hope that the two of them can find peace, or forgiveness, in one another's company.”
* * *
Revan looked at the door to conference room two and sighed. He knew Bastila was inside the room, he could feel that much about her. However, she’d blocked all the other ways he usually felt her presence, especially her emotions. With a deep breath, he walked into the room.
Mission sat on the sofa at the end of the room closest to him. Her special Pazzak deck was spread out in front of her and a childish sticking out of her tongue indicated she was busy playing against herself. He shook his head and looked around for the woman he wanted to see, to talk to.
Bastila was standing at the north window, looking out. She had her back deliberately turned away from him and her turquoise eyes were dark as she pointedly gazed out at Coruscant's busy horizon. He reached into the bond, stretched out to her and winced as she slapped him back. He could have pushed harder, but it would have been a painful battle of wills... not what he wanted.
“Hey, Rev!” Mission looked up, spying him for the first time. “How’d the meeting that ‘non-Jedi aren't allowed to attend’ go?”
Looking at Bastila and feeling her spine taking in every word, Revan sighed slightly and glanced at the young, blue Twi'lek.
“Well, I think I managed to stop someone making a bad mistake.” He felt Bastila's emotional control jerk at that, and continued to look at her. “The Council is deciding what to do about it. But they didn't have any answers for me about my ‘recovery’...”
Mission looked upset and he felt a twitch of interest and sorrow leak from Bastila’s control for a few seconds. Frowning, Mission looked at each of them in turn.
“I’ve been trying to get Bastila to tell me why she nicked the Hawk an’ what they wanted to talk to her about. She’s been very quiet an’ won’t answer.” She huffed and looked at the figure at the window. “Now you’re here, Rev, maybe I can get some answers out of Jedi locked lips over there, yeah?”
Revan saw Bastila stiffen further and he looked at Mission with a tired smile.
“She wanted to see her mother. She’s sick.”
“Oh no. Is... is it curable?” Mission asked, her voice suddenly upset. Revan shook his head.
“No. But that's the main reason she came to Coruscant, isn’t it Bastila?”
“You bastard,” Bastila muttered quietly without looking at him. Mission looked around in shock, but Revan stood there in the middle of the room. Exhaustion, from everything that had happened to him in the past weeks, was rapidly beginning to overtake him. “You supercilious, noble bastard.”
“Bast, what... what're you saying? Rev and you, you’re in love, yeah? Why’d you call him that?” Mission looked at them each, fear and shock rippling across her face. Bastila ignored her and, turning around, stepped up to Revan with her hands on her hips.
“You couldn't let me handle this my way!” she snapped. The anger she felt with him flowed freely, even as she felt guilty... attacking him for saving her from herself. “You had to act the hero again, had to save me from myself! Must be getting a taste for it! After you saved me from the dark side, your dark side!'
“I couldn’t let you ruin everything you are, everything I care about you, over guilt Bastila,” Revan's voice was quiet.
Far too quiet, Mission thought worriedly.
“So, you stole into my mind while I was sleeping, saw me kill that young woman in a dream and then what? Eh?” She turned away from him and stormed back to the window. “Put two and two together and just couldn’t let me go to the correct authority to judge me. Had to get involved! I mean [I[why[/I]?”
“I love you,” Revan whispered. “I need you and you would have let them split us apart if it eased your guilt... Bastila, I know how you feel but she was a torturer, she helped turn you to the dark side. It’s no wonder you struck her down in fear and anger. You have to realize that anything you did after Malak tortured you was down to fear and hatred. I couldn’t let you sacrifice yourself, our love or what we could have in the future for that. Please, I don’t want this... this anger between us anymore. I need you.”
“And what makes you think I need you?” Bastila snapped back, instantly regretting the words as she did so.
What the hell is wrong with me? she thought, as Revan slumped further towards the carpet. He’s been through as much hell as I have, had to face me on the Forge, the woman he loves... By the Force I owe him my damn life! So why can’t I forgive him for doing what he did in the Council chamber? He did it because of our love, not for any selfish reason.
“Look... Revan,” Bastila turned to him, her voice tinged with regret, “I need to...”
As she turned and looked at him, a gasp escaped her lips. Revan’s face was wet as tears poured from his eyes. She’d never seen any man cry and it was a shock to see him, someone so strong all the time, in total defeat. Bastila’s own face creased in empathy and she walked towards him.
“I'm sorry,” she whispered and Revan looked at her, a deep sob escaping his chest.
“I... I can't hold onto it anymore,” he managed to say, shuddering slightly.
Bastila was about to ask him what he was talking about, when a torrent of pain, despair and guilt poured down the bond and slammed into her skull. She gasped loudly, looking at Revan in agonized empathy. Unable to prevent the emotions ripping into her, she fell back, slamming her head against the plastiglass of the room’s window. She slid down the glass wall, sobbing in unison with Revan. She felt all the emotion he’d stored since Malak, since he had told him the truth, since she’d been taken from him and twisted, rip past his defenses and slam into her.
Mission, unable to sense or understand any of the power roaring down the bond, could only watch in shocked horror as Bastila fell back against the glass, her face coated in tears and her body jerking helplessly. Revan had slumped, tears also pouring from his eyes, onto his knees. His arms wrapped tightly around his chest and moans of horror slipping from his mouth in a steady stream. Terrified, Mission ran from the room, she had to get someone she trusted, skilled in the Jedi arts... Jolee or Juhani!
“Jolee!” she cried out running down the corridor, past shocked Jedi. “Juhani!”
Bastila writhed against the glass, and a small part of her mind reeled at the sheer power of the emotion tearing through her. How had he held this back? Had it been her, the sole thing he was proud of that had kept this terrible despair at bay? She shook her head and tried to fend it off her mind, she had to help Revan... she had to! Even as she tried to block, deflect or soothe his pain, her barriers shattered as soon as she erected them. Looking at Revan, with sorrow on her face, she gave up resisting and let the images flow.
“They say the Force can do terrible things to a mind.”
“You don't know who you are do you?”
“You are Darth Revan!”
“Yes, it's true. You are Revan.”
“This isn’t over, Malak! For the Jedi!”
“You don't understand, I have given myself freely to Malak and the dark side!”
Guilt, overwhelming guilt.
“I could never love anyone as weak as you!”
All the images, the memories, blurred into a terrible maelstrom and Bastila fought to free herself from its grip. Her own emotional control had been forever difficult to maintain, and now it was impossible. The torrent threatened to rip her mind apart and she groaned, clutching at her skull, as her mind clashed against its dangerous power. She looked at Revan and felt the anchor and the power of her love for him, steady her against the rip and pull. She had to help him, somehow. Reaching out, she touched his mind.
You have to stop it, you're hurting me! she thought desperately and Revan looked at her. Closing his eyes, he concentrated on the love she sent to him, fought against the flow of his turmoil.
Suddenly, as quickly as they had assaulted her, the emotions battering her mind vanished and she slipped to the carpet in exhaustion. She could feel the pull of the bond as Revan fought to control them once again. He gripped his head in obvious battle with himself and she pulled herself upright and crawled across to him. As her soft hands slipped gently onto his, he opened his eyes and looked at her with total despair.
“I can't do it anymore. I’ve fought it ever since the Leviathan, since Malak,” he whispered to her as she pulled his hands down into her lap, they shook slightly and Bastila tightened her grip. “Do you know what it's like, Bast? To find out that all you ever have been is a lie? That someone has inserted a past into your mind? Memories, parents, a career you think you had? I can remember all of it! Fighting a Sith fighter patrol on the Corellian run, sweeping past them with supplies for the Republic!”
She gasped as he suddenly reached out and gripped her tightly round the waist, burying his face into the side of her neck. Her hands automatically slid up his back and she gripped him as tightly as he did her.
“The only thing that keeps you going is the woman you love,” he whispered, pain in every word. “Then, to your horror, you lose her. She’s taken from you, and there’s nothing you could do to stop it!” He sighed with misery. “When you finally catch up with her, she's been twisted into everything she hates, and it’s all your fault!”
Bastila felt tears slip into her eyes, she knew how he felt. Knew very well. It was the same she felt every time she looked at herself in the mirror. The shame, the guilt... all of it inside her, unable to escape.
“I can’t live the lie anymore; I'm Revan and I have to accept it,” he said quietly, his voice wracked with agony. Pulling back he gazed into her turquoise eyes. “But I can’t be that strong without you anymore!”
“Then don’t,” she whispered at him gently, feeling her anger with him crumble. “Let it go. I love you, Revan, I love you for who you are, so share some of your pain with me... please.”
“What about you?” he whispered, and she sighed... always concerned for her as much as himself. “Will you share yours with me? Will you let me help you, as I help myself?”
She nodded and her mind shuddered suddenly, pulling a gasp of surprise out of her as Revan dropped all his defenses and pulled her mind close to his. She felt him reach out to her, and she let her own defenses drop. With the both of them so close, so unguarded with their emotions, thoughts and memories the bond slipped from a connection of two people to the sharing of one mind.
Emotion, yet peace. |
Ignorance, yet knowledge.
Passion, yet serenity.
Chaos, yet harmony.
Death, yet the Force.
|Jedi Striker||Aug 25 2011, 11:39 PM Post #11|
Revan felt her memories, her emotions, everything that made her who she was, slip into him and he gasped as everything she was slipped next to him, as though he could reach out and touch her. Bastila felt the same and she marveled at everything she felt from him. Unable to help herself, she drifted with him through their combined memory, feeling overwhelmed. She wanted more time to explore, to marvel at the feeling this joining provided. But she couldn’t, she had to help.
It’s time, she thought gently as she felt Revan try to slip gently between her and his emotions. With a sigh, her mind slipped next to his and she felt Revan pull back slightly. I’m not afraid to feel what you've been through.
I don’t want you to feel any of it, he thought reluctantly. I’ve changed my mind.
Bastila felt him begin to pull back, to erect his mental barriers and reduce the joining. She reached out to him and gripped his mind with hers, her love for who he was wrapping them together.
I need you, Revan, as much as you need me, she sent to him, and his mind rejoined hers ever so softly. Please, I need you.
He sighed and she felt his unease slip into her mind, even though he wanted to release all his guilt. She wouldn’t let him go and gripped his mind with determination, until with a tender brush of apology, he pulled her with him. Memories flashed into her mind, as his own sought the ones that filled him with such terrible pain. Overwhelming at first, she soon felt the flow slow.
I hope you're ready, he thought and she felt his misery trickle into her mind as the images began to slip into her. I hope you understand.
His parents smiling and reaching out to him as a child, his first birthday, school, a fight with a school bully, his first kiss... All of the memories slipped past her in a sudden flood and with each one she could feel his despair.
All of these are my memories from who I thought I was, he sent to her, a terrible sadness mixed with the words. Who I actually am is Revan, a fallen Jedi who caused more murder, destruction and cruelty than the Mandalorian wars. The worst thing is, for all of my knowledge of what happened to me, some of the memories... He paused and sighed sadly. Some I can't believe are false, and some I don't want to think are false. I... I have one which I wish with every fiber in my being was real, but it can't be.
Show me, Bastila whispered and Revan sighed. With a nod she felt a sudden tug and...
With a flash, Bastila found herself looking at a young man, sixteen or seventeen in age, climbing a hill in the middle of nowhere. A small survival pack clamped to his shoulders with unigrips. He stood up, panting from exhaustion and looked out across the horizon. In the distance, ships from a starport flew into the sun and he grinned. With a sigh, he turned back to the hillock and began to climb once more. Bastila looked around and saw Revan standing quietly watching the young man. His face was mixed with emotions. They followed the young version of him to a hillock and watched as he set up a tent. Turning around the young man grinned once more, another figure was climbing the hillock, another environ pack across its shoulders.
“Telri, you made it!” Revan cries out to the figure, who looks up with a growl.
“You bog slime, why'd you pick this place for our camp? It’s miles away from anywhere!” Telri shouts from her ascent and Revan grins.
Bastila watches as his young frame runs down the hill and strives to help the figure, now she can see it’s a young Twi'lek girl and she’s obviously here for him.
“I'm glad you came,” Revan says with a smile and he pulls the pack off her shoulders. “I... I wanted you to see this; it's my favorite spot on the whole planet.”
“Don’t your parents ever get worried about where you are?” she asks him with a sigh, and Revan shakes his head.
“Nah. Dad thinks it's a good thing for me, mom too. Sometimes I come up here to think about what I want to be...”
“Oh?” Telri asks as they reach the top of the hill and she collapses at the edge rubbing her feet. “So what is it? Soldier, smuggler, scout... Jedi?” she asks this last and grins.
Bastila felt a flash of regret from her Revan and glanced over.
I think that Vandar and the others have a wonderful sense of humor, Revan whispered and Bastila blanched at his mixed emotions, his irony. It’'s so funny, that added Jedi comment. How do they do it?
With a shiver at his tone, Bastila wrenched her eyes back to the memory playing itself out in front of her.
“I dunno,'” Memory Revan says with a shrug. “All of them have what I really want.”
Telri looks across and smiles at him. Her light blue skin is glowing in the sunlight and Bastila watches with a feeling of embarrassment as Revan slips closer to her on the grass.
“And that would be?” she asks with a smile. Revan sighs and slips an arm across her shoulders.
“I want to see the galaxy, not get stuck here. I’m only seventeen but soon, when I'm eighteen and I get the qualifications from flight school? I'm leaving.”
“Oh, where to?”
“Anywhere I can.” Revan looks at Telri and smiles at her. “I’m gonna make my fortune out in those stars, and when I become rich,” he pulls her close, “I’m coming back to make you my queen.”
Teri laughs and leaning across kisses him. He holds her tightly and together they watch the horizon as the sun sinks slowly, the ships in the sky flickering into tiny glowing dots as the sky darkens. Bastila felt slightly sick. This was so personal, so very private and yet Revan wanted her to see it, needed her too. She looked across at him and saw that his eyes were moist. This memory was painful to him now that he knew the truth, so very painful. With a gentle shudder, the memory faded and Bastila finds herself once more in the soft glow of their shared mind.
[I[All of that is false,[/I] Revan thought gently. Out of all of them, I wish this were true the most. How do I live my life knowing that all I can remember is a lie? What can make up for all of that?
I understand, Bastila thought back. I wish what we did to you was untrue, but it is and I know how you must feel.
Do you? He looked at her. How do you know what I feel when I can't sort it out myself? I feel...
Betrayed? Angry, shocked, depressed, as though everything you believed was and is a lie? Bastila said in one go and Revan looked at her, speechless. Because it’s how I felt not too long ago, when I fell and with the darkness coursing through me, examined my own life. But I had someone make me realize something.
What? Revan thought at her with reluctant curiosity and Bastila smiled.
That when you have someone who loves you? Bastila looked at him and Revan felt her love slip across him. That the past is the past and we are who we are, no matter what happens.
If that were true, then I should still be Darth Revan! he thought with a grimace at her and Bastila sighed slightly.
Darth Revan was a powerful force for good before he fell after the Mandalorian Wars. When he turned to the dark side he lost himself. She smiled. But I think, even with the loss of your memories, you are more like him than ever. Like the man I always thought you were.
With a sigh, Revan smiled at her; she knew how to press the right buttons. He felt the despair lift slightly and stared at her. He could feel her belief in him, her acceptance of who he was now and in the future. With a slight grin, he shook his head. She was right, even with the loss of his memories – the fact that his past was a lie – she was right. He had to live in the future, create his own memories and past for himself. One thing he knew for certain though, Bastila was the one thing he wanted above all else, and the one thing he needed. He felt part of his depression lift but another part still gnawed at him. Bastila felt it and he looked at her mind with uncertainty.
What? she thought quickly at him, and he looked at her sadly.
Despite all that I’ve managed to achieve, he said gently and Bastila felt his guilt. Malak’s death, the destruction of the Star Forge, hell, even all the good you helped me do while we looked for the Star Maps. None of that excuses what I did, what I started.
What Darth Revan started, Bastila said gently and she felt him disagree.
I began this, the fact that I can’t remember it means nothing. I started this war, with my belief in the Sith. All the death and destruction, the mangled worlds, ruined lives. He winced and his guilt flooded her. How do I live with that? I feel guilt over things I can’t remember... spent the past few weeks trying to undo a tiny part of the damage that I caused. Even with the Star Forge destroyed, the Sith still exist and are attacking the Republic. All of this is my fault.
Not yours, Darth Revan’s, she repeated to him, urged him to see the truth. Even with part of his name, you are not him. Who you used to be is gone. In his place stands a man who follows the light, who is a force for good and who is now the person I love... you. The loss of your memories, your personality, is a terrible price to pay for redemption, but believe me; you are worth the price. Take pride in what you have achieved as a Jedi. Take strength from the fact that I love you with all my heart. Also, if you want to truly atone for all you've done? Bastila said gently. Then continue what you’ve started. Be who you are, not who you used to be. Darth Revan is dead and Jedi Revan is now who you are. We can force the Sith back and help everyone once more.
Revan sighed and Bastila felt the darkness left inside him lessen ever so slightly. Bastila was right, Revan decided. He had to concentrate on what he’d accomplished as who he was now, not who he had been. The fact that she needed him, loved him, wanted to be with him, made living with the knowledge of what he had lost easier to cope with.
Bastila’s mind slipped around his gently and he felt her warmth, as though she was breathing softly onto his neck. He wished that he’d been able to prevent the torture she'’d suffered at Malak’s hands, wanted to help her deal with her pain and guilt now as she had him. Even as the thought passed through his mind, he felt her withdraw sharply, frightened.
My turn, he thought gently pulling her back; Bastila's mind recoiled just a little. Show me.
I can’t, Bastila whispered. I can help you, but what happened to me is... is...
Is what’s keeping you up at night, giving you nightmares, affecting your judgment and filling you with guilt.
Always the one with the fast answers… Bastila thought tersely at him, but Revan felt her grudging acceptance. Very well, but you won't like what I have to show you, what you'll feel though me.
I’ve seen some of what you feel, he said quietly to her. Your nightmare at the hospital, I saw that. All your guilt, all your anger and fear, it all came through that dream. I want to help you, Bast.
He felt her shift slightly inside his mind and with a flash he was there, actually with her, inside a memory she'd been keeping quiet about since her corruption.
* * *
It’s cold on the slab. He/she can feel it seep through the clothes on her back. The muscles in her thighs are numb, as are his/her arms and wrists, the cold metal clamps hold him/her to this damn stone slab and it's hard to sleep when your muscles complain all the time. He/she’s so tired. But he/she must be strong, has to be for him... Revan the man he/she loves and the man who is searching for him/her. He/she wonders how much longer she has to wait, has to endure night after night of the cold and the damp until he walks through the door, picks him/her up and saves him/her from Malak and the dark side.
A sudden fall of footsteps makes him/her look round. Two days of this has gone by, she can tell by the change of the guards keeping an eye on her. That in itself has been hard. One of them, she knows which one with the Force, has been taking liberties with her while she's been tied down. He likes to run his hands across her helpless body and watch her flinch... The footsteps are getting louder and she recognizes the shoes, it's her...
The young woman who walks around the corner is quite small, only five feet high or so. She walks with a slight limp, from where she/he doesn't know, but the step is unique on the stone and metal.
Click, shuffle click, click, shuffle click... It fills Bastila/Revan with dread, despite his/her training, for this is the footfall of the woman who tortures him/her.
“Hello sweetie.” Her voice is sickeningly amused, almost tender and he/she flinches at the grin on her torturer's face. “Malak has some work he needs to be done on the Star Forge, new robots for your little friend Revan to meet. So he’s told me to keep you amused for the rest of tonight until he can get to you tomorrow morning. He wants to have a little chat… oh, and show you his skill with Force Lightning, so I hoped you managed to get some sleep while I took a dinner break.”
Bastila/Revan watches as she places the box that she carries on the floor. With a gentle sigh, the woman – she’s never mentioned her name – slips the lid open and plays with the things inside.
Most of what she’s done to Bastila/Revan, she/he's managed to block out. The last one, however, had been so terrible it had burned itself into his/her mind, past all her defenses. She'd used some sort of nano-probe and had cut an incision into Bastila/Revan's stomach, inserting a rod with thin wires into the wound. He/she knew now that the probe had been designed to stimulate the nerve endings of the tissue it came into contact with. All Bastila/Revan could remember was the feeling as though liquid fire had been poured inside him/her, the agony of the unending burning sensation and his/her torturer's laughter as she twisted the probe. Even with his/her Jedi training, after nine hours non-stop it had worn him/her to sheds. Now, whenever she/he sees her Bastila/Revan feels the faint stirrings of hatred, and they feel good.
“I have new toys to play with.” Torturer looks up at her victim on the slab. For just a second, fear grips Bastila/Revan’s heart and he/she shivers. “Maximum pain with minimum damage. After all, I can’t have Malak's prize injured, he’ll kill me.”
Not if I do it first! Bastila/Revan thinks for just a second, before he/she feels ashamed and horrified. “This is pointless! I will not turn!”
Torturer pulls out a set of tiny devices and smiles at Bastila/Revan.
“See this?” she asks with a cruel smile. “When I place these around your heart, with one push of a button I can stop it. Let’s see how long you can go without a heartbeat, yes?”
[I[You feel guilt over the death of this... this human piece of filth?[/I] Revan thought at her, the memory slipping back into her subconscious. His need to protect her was powerful and she felt his disbelief and distaste for the woman she struck down. You’re a better Jedi than I am, to feel guilt over putting her down. She was scum, Bastila, sick and cruel for cruelty sake! If I'd been in your position, I'd have done the same!
I don't believe you, Bastila’s mind accused him gently. You’re so much stronger at controlling your emotions than I, you would have resisted the lure of the dark side, would have never killed her in anger, in fear. I know you.
Even if you’re right, I can understand why you struck her down. All that fear leading to hatred. He turns to her and she felt his love wrap itself around her. I forgive you, Bast.
I wasn’t strong enough, she thought miserably. I’m a Jedi, or I used to be, I should have been strong enough to resist my own hatred!
You were, he replied gently. It took Malak a week to turn you, Bast; she was part of his plan. If I’d been just a little faster, you’d never have fallen.
This isn’t your fault! she thought quickly. You had to find the Star Map, and I know how hard that must have been. I don’t blame you I blame myself. If I had been stronger, you would have been able to rescue me. I... I would never have attacked you on the Rakatan Temple.
He sighed and she felt his forgiveness flood her mind.
I have more to show you, Bastila whispered, shame flooding her. But the need for her to share what she felt was growing. I have something shameful, something I felt about you.
Show me then, he whispered gently in her mind, and with little effort the memory slipped back, except now he stood watching to one side, but the emotions of what she was feeling remained…
She's tired now and in terrible pain. Torturer has left, left due to her own exhaustion. While she’s going to sleep on a soft bunk, Bastila remains chained to the slab, cold and in agony. She sobs quietly and tears pour down her face. Where is he, the man she loves?
He’s left you. A part of her, the darkest part that she’s denied all her life whispers. Here in the temple, it’s taken on a life of its own, or so she thinks. Gone, can’t face the danger to save you. So here we are, being tortured and for what? What on earth would bring him back here to save you?
“Love,” she whispers; the guards chortle at the great Jedi is talking to herself.
Love? Love is a lie. There is only passion! Passion leads to power in the darkness that Malak offers, and you could use it to escape.
“No. I will not turn to the dark side.”
Even if it’s the only way you can escape? Look, all you friends, your lover, have left you here. Revan is scared of the temple, scared of Malak. He’ll stay as far away from this place as possible, after all, the voice in her head sniggered. He owes the Council nothing, they erased everything he is. That leaves him coming for you. But you lied to him, used him...
“He’ll come. I know he’ll come for me, for the Council. He follows the light. But they have to find the final Star Map; that could take ages.”
You fool. He’ll not come for you. You’ll have to rely on yourself, as you always have. I know you have the power inside you to take out everyone in this place. Give in to your fear, your anger... The Jedi Council would praise you for killing Malak, by any means.
“No. I... I know he’s coming for me. I can be strong,” she whispers, feeling the voice flitter back into her subconscious, leaving a faint lingering doubt in her mind. “I have to be. He’ll be here, he will.”
With a determined nod she begins to concentrate, shoring up her emotional control once again, healing her body and preparing herself for Malak. But the seed remains in her mind as she drifts off. He’s left me here alone.
“Hello, Bastila. How are we feeling today?” Malak asks her, as she’s shaken awake by the guards. “I understand that you’ve been refusing any food from Sera here.”
Bastila looks across to the blonde torturer and glowers.
“I don’t need anything from the Sith. I have my belief in the Code of the Jedi.”
“Ah, the Code. Well, I’m sure that helps keep you warm and cozy on this slab of stone. Tell me, how does it feel to be my guest for the past few days? I would have thought Revan would have made an appearance by now.”
“Yes, I hear you’ve been saying that for quite some time. What if he doesn’t?”
“No more, Malak,” she states, feeling a tug inside at his words. “I presume you’re here to try and accomplish what – Sera, wasn't it? – what she failed to do.”
“And that was?” he asks, his voice amused.
“To turn me. To cause me enough pain so that I will slip into darkness.”
“Ah. Sorry, my dear, but that’s not why I had her hurt you.”
“It... it wasn’t?” she asks, feeling a flash of anger at Sera’s smug expression.
“No. I just wanted to watch you being tortured. I like to watch her working, she’s very good. Our time together really begins now, so lets see how much lightening you can take in one go, shall we? If it gets too much for you, feel free to scream Revan’s name as much as you like. No one will mind.'
The memory flickered and Revan found himself back in the cool non-space of their shared mind. Bastila hovered close and he looked at her gently.
There’s more, she thought, feeling his mixed emotions. But the rest I need to come to terms with myself. Having you here has been a great help but I have to apologize. I should have had more belief in your love for me, in our relationship. I... I don’t deserve you.
Sith poo-doo, Revan thought at her with power and Bastila reeled back in surprise. I am honored to be the one you love. If anything its me who doesn't deserve you! You’re the strongest person I know. Bastila!
But I failed our love, our union! she wailed suddenly at him, powerfully, and Revan sighed. I should have known you’d come for me! Bond or no bond, I should have held on. I should have refused to believe any of Malak’s lies! If I’d been strong then you would never have faced such temptation. My offer of the Sith, my loyalty and... and of my body.
Revan watched her as she stuttered this at him. With a sigh, he looked at her with compassion and she looked at him, struggling to keep it back... so stubborn.
Bast, it’s okay. True, seeing you so twisted was terrible for me. He sighed and she gasped at the feeling of desire slipping into him. I can’t deny that your offer, oh your offer was so very tempting. You stood there, both a terrible and beautiful site. When you looked at me with those eyes, did you know your eyes hadn’t changed? I would have agreed to almost anything you asked of me, just so we could be together. She felt his guilt at this admission. If it hadn’t been for the memory of our first kiss, well... The soft need... the love you gave me that had gone... All I felt from you when you offered yourself to me was twisted desire, not love. I... I should have been the one at Malak’s hands! he thought suddenly, wishing he could have spared her the pain she felt now.
No! Bastila replied quickly and he looked at her gently. No... You had to find the Star Maps. It was my choice then. I mean, I know how long it must have taken to find one Star Map; after all you, had every reason to be as fast as possible, you knew that time was of the essence and...
Here we go, Revan thought. Bastila was struggling to repress what she really felt: her feelings of abandonment. He knew it was one large part of what was pulling her apart and he had to make her release it.
Let it go, Bastila, my love. Just let it go. He watched her face twist in pain and she suddenly started to scream into him.
I mean the fact that I trusted you and you didn’t come, you didn’t come until it was too late, means nothing! she snapped loudly, arguing with herself, with her anger and guilt. That I spent days on that slab waiting for your footfall, dreamed of your arms around me, struggled to hold on for a week against everything Malak threw at me! No, I don’t blame you at all for taking as long as you did, despite what happened to me! Not me, not my fault... not yours. No ones. Her mind shuddered with pain as she yelled this at him.
It was my fault, Bast, all of it. I’m so, so sorry. I should have been faster, stronger. I should have been able to finish Malak on the Leviathan, should have been able to save you before he even got his claws into you.
She looked up at him and shook her head with a sigh. With the release of her pain, she could finally let it go and it felt good. Reaching out with her mind, she brushed him gently in apology.
No, it really wasn’t your fault and I... I suppose it wasn’t mine either, she admitted reluctantly and some of her shame washed away. My pride, my stubbornness, my passion... they helped me to fall, but in the end.. Bastila sighed and shook her head. In the end, I suppose it was mostly Malak’s fault. I... I just wish I’d been strong enough to hold on until you could free me.
You were strong, Revan said quietly and felt her shiver in his mind’s grip. She needed his love as much as he needed hers, needed the strength he could give her. So very strong. Even when the darkness took you, I could feel you, Bast. Who I was lost himself, you didn’t.
She looked up at him in amazement and he grinned.
I could feel the tiny spark of light left in you on the Forge. I knew I could save you, that you could save yourself if you had a reason. The reason I gave you was so simple. He leaned close and she felt his love bathe her. I love you, and even then you knew it. You saved yourself and I am so proud of you for that. She felt him reach out to her. I love you, Bastila Shan, I am proud to be your lover and having seen all of this, I believe in you more than ever.
His admiration poured into her and she felt almost all of her crushing guilt dissipate at his minds touch, the truth of his words slipping into and through her.
You really mean that, don’t you? she sent him, her mind drenched in relief. What did I do to deserve you? I love you so much and despite all I’ve done, you’re still here.
A herd of banthas couldn’t pull me away from you right now! His mind slipped back a few paces and she looked at him. I need to talk to you in the real world. It’s important.
With a gentle feeling of peace and forgiveness now trickling through her, it was so easy to reach back into herself and separate her mind from his. With a gentle shivering sensation that slowly filled her body, Bastila felt the bond between them dissolve slightly and return to a sensation at the back of her mind.
Her awareness of the physical world slipped back into place and as she opened her eyes. Revan’s now smiling face focused into view. She grinned and tilted her head at his expression, a look of tenderness that thrilled her. “What?”
“I want to do something right now,” he whispered to her, eyes bright with desire. “Something I’ve wanted to do for the past three days. Well... since our first kiss on the Hawk actually.”
Without waiting for her answer, Revan leaned forwards, his hands still gripping her waist gently, and slipped his lips softly onto hers. Her eyes widened in delighted surprise and she returned the kiss with the same intensity. By the Force, she needed him.
For a few moments, all she could think off was the hot, intense feeling spilling down her throat, through her lips, his breath... flooding every part of her body with warmth. The taste of him washed away her remaining fears and doubt about herself, their relationship... everything.
With a sigh, she gripped him and held him tightly. This was what she’d needed, and what she’d foolishly denied herself. His love, his own acceptance of who she was, filled the void that had gnawed at her for the past few days.
I love you, she whispered into him, the bond carrying emotion rather than words, and she felt him marvel at the power of her.
I know. I love you too, Bastila... my Bastila, everything I could ever need.
His hands slid gently up from Bastila’s waist to slowly trace her bodyline, the other gently cradled her neck, pulling her closer to him as he broke the kiss and slid down to begin again, kissing her throat gently. The thrill made Bastila run her hands through Revan’s hair, indulging herself in the silky feel of it.
Unable to take the feeling of each kiss slipped onto her neck, unable to cope with the tingling, incredible warmth spreading through her, Bastila arched her back with a groan of pleasure. She gripped him tightly around the neck and pulled Revan even tighter to her.
Revan marveled at the feel of her skin, the warmth of her body and, inhaling slightly, could smell the spicy hair cleanser she’d used while on the Hawk. She was intoxicating, everything he would ever need. He stopped thinking and ravaged her neck once more with soft kisses, he was hers and she was his... that was all that mattered.
Bastila sighed; she wanted to lose herself in the moment, wanted to immerse herself in his touch. However, a sudden remembrance of where she and Revan where, filled her mind and she pulled back. Her glazed eyes focused once more on the door, and on the building and then on him. With a deep breath, she looked at Revan’s puzzled face and shook her head.
“We can’t, not here. What if someone comes in? What if the Council needs to see us while we’re... we’re…”
He grinned and slipped his hands onto her shoulders, the gentle pressure rocking her backwards slightly and for just a second she resisted, until he kissed her again. She moaned slightly, the warmth melting any resistance.
“Well then, we’ll just have to tell them that we're busy,” Revan muttered gently, nuzzling her neck. “Very busy and unable to accede to their request.”
Bastila began to giggle, all the pressure of the past few days seeping away from her, and lying back, she yanked Revan gently down on top of her. The soft carpet dug into her shoulders and she felt him slowly work his way down her throat once more, until he reached the top of her tunic. Her breath caught in her throat.
Ever so gently, he reached up to the tiny zip holding it closed and rested his hand on it. Pulling his face back, he looked at her with questioning eyes, and her breath trembled as it escaped her lips. This was it, she thought with a feeling of trepidation. The first time she had ever given herself to anyone and Revan was waiting for her to make the move. With a few slow breaths, she bit her lip and nodded.
Revan began to slowly slide the zip to her tunic down and Bastila gripped him tightly as he did so. He unzipped it to just above the last few inches or so and to her surprise stopped, only to gently slide his left hand under the tight stretchy cloth and run it gently along her waist, along her bare skin. Bastila moaned and shivered slightly, his touch was like icy fire and nothing in her past had prepared her for this, nothing.
Pulling his hands back, Revan yanked the robes he wore away from his body. Bastila slowly ran her hands across his bare chest, pausing at one slight saber scar for a few seconds and wincing slightly. Using his right hand to gently pull her hand away from the memory of how close they had come to being separated, his head descended and she felt his lips slide down to assault her stomach.
Bastila writhed under him, lost, letting her body dictate what happened. She was like putty as he began to pull down the zip of her tunic. She wanted him to, needed him to yank it the final few inches down across her stomach. Her liquid eyes glanced loosely over to the smoked glass of the door. The sudden group of shadows behind it, however, the cacophony of familiar voices, made her freeze and grip Revan tightly in embarrassed shock. He looked up and also froze, his hands gripping her defensively.
“I’m telling you, Jolee, one minute they’re screaming at each other, well, Bastila, is anyway, and the next,” Mission jumped about from foot to foot in anxiety as her two Jedi friends walked gracefully along the corridor from the turbolift, “Bastila's flying backwards across the room and she bangs her head against the window and Revan is on his knees in the middle of the room, crying. I... I’ve never seen anything like it, guys!”
“Calm yourself, Mission,” Juhani said gently looking at the anxious Twi'lek with compassion. “I’m sure that everything is fine.”
“Fine? You weren’t there, Ju!” Mission muttered turning back to the glass door. “I mean if Rev is as powerful as everyone is saying... if he goes funny in the head, then who’ll stop him?”
“Calm down, kid, let’s find out what’s been going on first, yes?” Jolee looked at Juhani with a quick glance and the Cathar unhooked her saber hilt. “They’ve both been under a lot of stress recently, maybe they just both decided to blow off steam or something.”
“Poo-doo, Jolee. I’ve never seen anything like that before. We could find anything in there!” Mission muttered as the door hissed open and she walked through. “We could find...”
She stopped dead in the doorway, blocking the other two Jedi. Eyes wide, she took in the scene of her two friends wrapped together in the middle of the room, Revan's robes strewn across the floor. Her mouth continued with commentary, even as her mind reeled in shock.
“We... we could find them on top of one another, almost naked an’... an’ stuff!” she stuttered as Bastila’s face turned a bright shade of red. “Naked and kissing. But mostly them naked and on top of each other!”
“What?” Juhani’s voice came through behind her, confused. “What are you talking about?”
“I... I, well… Umm.” For the first time in her life, Mission was lost for words. “Wanna see?” she managed.
Jolee pushed her gently through the doorway and took in the sight of the two Jedi on the floor. With a grin, he grabbed the young Twi’lek and pulled her backwards, while at the same time waving the Cathar away.
“They’re fine, Juhani, fine. In fact,” Jolee grinned and a memory of Nayama and himself slipped into his mind, “in fact they’re better than fine. We should leave them for a little while to sort this out among themselves. So... either of you two whippersnappers know where the cantina is around here?”
As the voices of the group slid away slowly, Bastila moaned in horror and looked at Revan's carefully neutral face.
“Bugger!” she managed, her cheeks red, and Revan began to laugh. She scowled at him, trying to wriggle out from under his body. “You actually think this is funny?”
“Well, yeah actually, it’s just that I’ve never heard you swear like that before.” He smiled at her and, despite her embarrassment, she too felt her lips curve slightly. “Did you see Mission’s face? I thought she was going to faint!”
“This is no laughing matter,” she said as Revan slowly sat up away from her and she slid herself upright. “Jolee’s going to have a field day with this. It.ll keep him going for at least a week.”
“A week?” Revan looked around for his robes and spying them a few meters away pulled them towards himself. “I’d say a month, maybe longer.”
Bastila groaned at his sense of humor and stood, tucking errant strands of her hair back into the twin ponytails. She felt better, much better, and she knew why. Not only had he helped her cope with the lingering guilt she felt, but also he’d given her a taste of what being in love with him could mean.
Revan had slipped his robes back on and was tying the belt back round, when he caught her looking at him. He tilted his head and smiled at her. “What?”
“I just want you to know that you're the one,” she said quietly, trying to stop her hands from shaking gently.
“The one?” he asked her quizzically.
“My one, I... I’ve never been with a man before.” She turned away, her face red. “I was too wrapped up in training to be a Jedi to become... involved with anyone. From what I’ve heard from Juhani, she’s even had more experience than I have. So if we, if we make love then it’ll be the first time. I... I want you to be the one.”
Revan felt his heart flutter and walked gently across to her. Slowly, he turned her face back towards him.
“I’d just like to remind you, Bast, that I’m in exactly the same position.” He smiled at her puzzled face. “Everything I thought I've done? Well, those memories are not Darth Revan’s, they’re mine. If they’re mine, then...”
“Oh!” she said, her eyes widening and he smiled. She shook her head and a faint grin played across her lips. “Wonder how the Masters got those memories for you? Not from me, Vrook maybe?” She giggled at his face. “Or possibly Vandar, I bet he has many tails to tell about when he was a young Jedi.”
“Why, Padawan Shan.” Revan laughed his eyes gleaming. “Since you’ve come out of your self imposed shell, you’ve been much more fun to be with. I have to say I like it.” His voice became more serious. “But I want you to know right now, you’re my one too.”
With a sigh, Bastila looked around the room and shook her head, focusing her Jedi skills and calming her thumping heart. She turned to him and sighed again.
“We should go. I’m sure the Council will be calling us soon. I want to be there when they do.”
Revan tilted his head once more and his face was quizzical. “Oh? Why?”
“Because I need to be there to tell them…” she said taking his hand gently in hers and squeezing it. “I need to tell them that I’ve changed my mind on being punished. I need to tell them you were right and I was overreacting.”
“Not overreacting,” Revan said gently and smiled at her questioning face. “Overwhelmed by guilt. Something that you and I have dealt with, I hope.”
“Not all of it, as I’m sure you’ll agree for yourself.” Bastila looked at his eyes, saw the lingering pain and tightened her grip. “But enough. Enough to cope, to deal with the rest on our own.”
“Knowing that you love me for who I am, not who I was, helps me a great deal. I suppose I have to stop looking into the past, have to look to the future.” He reached up with is free hand and tilted her chin towards him, looked at her pale turquoise eyes. “If... if they try to separate us, will you come with me?”
Bastila shivered, and looked with equal need into his eyes.
“I need you, Revan. I... I could turn away from being a Jedi if you were with me. We could settle somewhere quiet.” She looked away and he felt her hand squeeze his again. “The Force knows you and I have seen more than enough darkness to last a lifetime. But, it won’t come to that. We have to trust in the Council, trust them to understand.”
“Trust?” he sighed and shook his head. “I have a hard time trusting any council of Jedi at the moment. Here, or the one on Dantooine.”
“I know.” Bastila pulled him slowly towards the door. “So trust me instead. Now, let’s go. Please?”
“Okay,” he sighed and smiled at her. “Just a second though, sweetness.”
He pulled her towards him and leaned into her face, kissing her gently. As she savored the taste of him, a sudden “zirrr” made her look down. He was pulling the zip that held her tunic closed back up her body. Blushing, she looked up at him. She’d forgotten all about it.
“Sweetness? You’ve spent far too much time with Carth, Jedi Revan.” She grinned.
“Shall we?” he asked her, face neutral, and she smiled. With a nod, they stepped together towards the door and the Council rooms.
Emotion, yet peace. |
Ignorance, yet knowledge.
Passion, yet serenity.
Chaos, yet harmony.
Death, yet the Force.
|Jedi Striker||Aug 25 2011, 11:41 PM Post #12|
“Please wait here, Knight Revan, Padawan Shan. The Council is still deliberating, although they have asked that your Jedi companions also come to the Council hall.”
“Thank you,” Bastila said to the female Jedi who stood respectfully outside the Council doors. “Has anyone notified Master Bindo and Knight Juhani?”
“Yes, Lady Shan, they should arrive shortly. Please, take a seat.”
Revan flung himself with good grace into one of the soft chairs lining the corridor and cocked his head at the Council doors. Whatever was going on in there, it was being hotly debated. Bored, he felt his saber flick into his hand and, with a soft motion, began to levitate and rotate. The female Jedi watched with a mild shake of her head and Revan grinned at her.
“Want to see me do a 360 with it?” he asked and she frowned.
“Revan,” Bastila hissed, warning in her voice. “Behave.”
“Sometimes you can be no fun at all,” he said quietly, and a grin played briefly across her lips in response. With a sigh, he let the hilt drop back into his hand and he hooked it back onto his belt.
“Well, well. Hi, you two. Got a seat for an old man?” Jolee asked, Juhani standing next to him, a soft smile playing across her usually stoic features.
“Jolee, sure. Here, take mine,” Revan said grinning. Jolee smiled at him and sat down on the proffered seat, a cup of coffee steaming in his hand. Juhani took up residence against the wall, inclining her head in Revan’s direction and also giving Bastila a swift respectful nod. The Cathar looked at the Council doors and Revan felt her apprehension.
“Juhani?” he asked her and she looked at him with nervous eyes. “What’s wrong?”
“I... I have never been to the main Council on Coruscant before,” she said, her voice trembling slightly. “I do not know why they have asked Jolee and myself to be here as well as you and Bastila.”
“My bets are on thanks for a job well done,” Jolee said with a grin. The Cathar frowned and Revan gently put a hand on her shoulder. “’Bout time the buggers acknowledged what we Jedi on the field are doing.”
“I agree with Jolee, Ju. You’ve got nothing to fear from them,” Revan said, as Juhani blushed at Jolee's comments in front of the female Jedi. “In fact, I think acknowledgement of what you did, how you helped me stay on the path of the light, is the least they should do.”
“I did no more to aid you, than what you did for me.” Juhani smiled slightly and Revan watched her relax a little. “Regardless, I shall obey the Council.”
“Careful, Juhani.” Jolee looked at her and waggled the coffee cup in a cautionary way. “Saying stuff like that can be dangerous. Look at me, a Jedi Master now, thanks to Vandar. If I’d known at the time what that meant, well I’d never have talked to the little guy.”
“Oh?” Revan grinned. “Afraid of training a group of Jedi wannabes, are we?”
'”Huh, you've got no respect for me,” Jolee grunted, taking a sip of his coffee. “I’m old, damn it! I haven’t got much time left for running around wiping young Jedi noses! If Vandar wanted to say thanks, all he had to do was point me in the direction of a good bar!”
“You love it, really,” Bastila said suddenly and Jolee turned to her, raising an eyebrow. “I mean, you like the way Revan talks to you, and you hate people bowing all the time. Revan can be brash and you like that!”
With a grunt Jolee grinned. “Suppose I do; it’s nice to see a Jedi who reminds me of myself.” He wiggled his cup at her. “Nice to see someone else coming out of her shell too.”
Bastila smiled and inclined her head. “It’s good to be out.”
“I see Revan’s methods of persuasion agree with you,” Jolee added with a smirk, before sipping his coffee quickly. Bastila's face turned red and Jolee looked at Revan with a grin. “Still, I suppose there’s a lot left for you two to... discuss yet.”
Juhani’s face was a picture of puzzlement. She watched as Revan blushed and turned away from Bastila, his shoulders shaking slightly. Bastila, also having gone red, looked away from the old man. Looking at them, a sudden light finally dawned on the Cathar and her eyes widened in shock. “Oh, they were...”
“Fast, isn’t she,” Jolee said quickly and grinned at her. “I was as surprised as you, lass. I mean, in the Jedi Temple... on Coruscant?”
Revan and Bastila both simultaneously cleared their throats and Jolee shook his head. “Can’t say I blame you, probably would have tried it myself at your age.”
“Where is Mission?” Bastila asked, composing herself and changing the subject.
“Mission has returned to the Hawk,” Juhani said quietly. “She was a... a bit shocked, but calmed down after we took her out to the gardens. Understandable really.”
The doors to the Council slid open slowly and a young male Jedi walked out and approached the group. Juhani slipped quietly into silence as he bowed.
“Master Bindo, Jedi Knights Juhani and Revan, and Padawan Shan?” the male Jedi said politely. “Please come with me. The Council awaits you.”
* * *
“Ah, Revan and colleagues,” Vreik said softly as the troupe walked in. “Now that you’re all here, we can begin.”
“What the... well, well.” Jolee looked at the female council member next to Vreik and grinned. “Nomi Sunrider. It’s been a long time.”
“Hello Jolee, and yes it has.” Sunrider smiled at him and leaned forwards. “Tell you what: once the meeting is over, would you care to meet up? We have a lot to catch up on.”
“I'd love to. Living on Kashyyyk all these years has left me out of the loop as far as Jedi matters are concerned. But that’s not why we're here is it?”
“No, but our decision does involve you, Master Bindo.” Vreik looked at Revan and Bastila. Both stood close to one another, and he raised an eyebrow at the sight of Revan’s left hand intertwined with Bastila's right. “The Council has decided and we are ready to tell you all what must be done. Bastila, you must come first of course.”
Bastila felt Revan gently tighten his grip, and she squeezed back gently. Looking at the Council leaders, she stepped forwards. “I am ready to accept your judgment, Masters. However, I ask that you be lenient as my fall to the dark side was at the hands of Malak, one of the most powerful Sith Lords. I ask for the Council to help me find my way once more, not to punish me as I requested earlier.”
“I see you have come to your senses, Bastila,” Vreik murmured, a gleam in his eyes. “It is good you have, for we were beginning to worry for you. Your fall to the dark side was due to many things, all of which were not in your power to have prevented. Indeed, there has been some discussion between us that you should be granted the title of Jedi Knight as has Revan and Juhani.”
Bastila felt Revan gently touch her mind. Maybe the Council isn't as dumb as I thought.
Revan, really! she thought back, her tone scolding and she glanced to her right as he cleared his throat, trying not to laugh. Turning back, she bowed.
“I do not feel I am ready yet, Masters. I lack the emotional discipline to accept the responsibility.”
“We would agree with you as far as the lack of emotional discipline. It has been pointed out by… someone not a million miles away, that you had rather a lot of overwhelming pressure placed on your young shoulders. To that end, we have come to a compromise.”
“Compromise?” she asked, her head tilting slightly.
“We have decided that for the time being you will remain a Padawan, until the Master we have chosen decides you are fully able to maintain the emotional discipline required of a Knight. Once they are satisfied, you will be given the title of Knight with our blessing and our thanks.”
“Thanks?” Bastila looked at the small Master with surprise and Vreik smiled.
“Yes, young one. Despite your fall, you managed to accomplish more than even a Jedi Master could have hoped on the mission assigned to you. Thanks to you, the Star Forge was discovered and destroyed and, more importantly, you protected your ward, Revan, at the expense of your following of the light.” Vreik looked at Sunrider and Hieruk. “The Council has also, with a majority vote I might add, found you innocent on all charges, especially murder. You are to be honored Padawan Shan, something that will happen as soon as you have learned control.”
“Heh. I’d hate to be the poor sod who has to teach you emotional control, Bastila,” Jolee said with a frown. He looked at her, shaking his head. “It’s one of the hardest things to learn, harder to teach. It took me many years in Kashyyyk, to accomplish what control I have. No, I don’t envy them at all.”
“That may be a problem then, Master Jolee.” Sunrider leaned forwards in her chair and smiled at him. “We have decided you will be the Master assigned to Bastila. We have great confidence in your ability to teach her all she needs.”
“Me?” Jolee looked at the council and Bastila turned red at his face, a mingled expression of horror and shock. “But... Me?”
“Thanks a lot. You make me feel really appreciated,” Bastila whispered at him and he shook his head.
“Hey kid, I like you. You'll make a fine Knight, hell, a fine Master someday.” She blushed at his serious tone. “But I’m not the one to teach you, really.”
“On the contrary, we think you’re perfect.” Sunrider grinned at him. “I remember a young Padawan who defied the Council long ago and began to smuggle supplies to a planet... He lacked emotional control, despite his friends telling him he needed to learn. But it seems he’s learned a lot since he left us...”
“Thanks a lot, Nomi,” Jolee muttered and sighing looked at Bastila with a shrug. “Fine. It seems you and me, kid, are going to be hooked together for a while. Just one thing, call me Master, and I'll knot your arms behind your head. We’ve been through too much poo-doo for you to start doing that. I promise I’ll sort you out in record time. We need Jedi such as you, Jedi who’ve seen the dark side, like Revan and Ju.”
“Of course, Jolee.” Bastila grinned at his face and turning back to the Council bowed. “Thank you for your understanding and... thank you for your leniency,” she said quietly, and Vreik nodded at her.
“We feel you have more than deserved it Bastila. Now,…” Vreik turned slightly and looked at Juhani. “Juhani, it is a pleasure to meet you finally.”
Juhani stepped forwards and the Cathar’s lithe body flipped into a deep bow. “The honor and pleasure are mine, Master. I am confused, however, as to why I have been summoned to the Council chambers as well as Revan, Bastila, and Master Jolee.”
“Juhani, you were instrumental in aiding Revan in his quest to find and destroy the Star Forge. You stood with him at all times, even during the hardest. It is only fitting you also receive our thanks.”
“I did only what the Council on Dantooine bid me,” she said shaking her head.
“That in no way diminishes what you accomplished alongside them, young Jedi. Indeed, Master Zhar – who had, thankfully, survived the destruction of Dantooine – has asked that upon your return to Dantooine, you join him in training the students. I understand that he wishes you to assume his role one day, to train them in saber combat. Regardless, the Council wishes to give you our thanks, your name will be forever inscribed into our history, as will the others, as a great Jedi of our Order.”
Juhani stared at Vreik with shocked pleasure and Revan nudged her slightly.
“Th... thank you, Masters,” she stuttered, looking around the council in dazed pleasure. Vreik nodded and looked at the quiet Jedi standing next to Bastila.
“That leaves you, Knight Revan. Unfortunately, the Council is unable as you know to provide you with what you wish.” Leaning forwards, his arm stretched out with a flourish. Revan took the small envelope held in his hand with a questioning look. “The envelope contains the... ‘favor’ you asked us for earlier. I hope this will go in some way to mending any rift between us?”
Revan sighed and nodded. “I... regret that I will never know what the discipline used to restore me actually did. However, I thank you for this and also for Master Hieruk giving me the data about who Revan was before he fell.” He looked up at Vreik and shrugged with a weak smile. “So, looks like you've got yourself a redeemed Jedi after all.”
Vreik smiled and turned to Sunrider. With a wave of his hand, the old woman stepped lithely down from her chair and smiled at the assembled group.
“Actually, the Council and the Senate would both like to show their appreciation for all you've done. Despite some, ah, heated debates in the Senate chamber, the majority has asked for your presence at the official victory gala being held tonight.” She held out her hand to Bastila, who took the small wafer she held gently. “They would appreciate as many of your party being there as possible. We know Carth Onasi will be unable to attend, as will your Wookiee friend, Zaalbar. They request, however, that the rest of your group attends, to officially receive the Medalsof Honor that Admiral Dodonna handed out on Lehon... live on the holonet. Indeed, we understand that the public will soon know that it was you, Revan, who vanquished Malak. The Council requests that you go, in order to demonstrate that you have been redeemed. Will you?”
Revan glanced at Bastila and cocked his eyebrow. Want to go? Dancing, drinking and people slapping you on the back?
Bastila looked at the wafer in her hand. Actually, I was hoping for a quiet fire, a soft bed and a certain Jedi to tuck me in... She looked at him, eyes sparkling, as his own widened in surprise. Still, I suppose we could do them a favor, for not mentioning or trying to wreak our relationship.
Revan nodded and glanced at Juhani. The poor Cathar had a mixed set of emotions on her face. She obviously wanted to come with Revan and the others, but she hated large groups of people and that warred with her emotional control. Revan looked at her and gently placed a hand on her arm.
“You don't have to come if you don't want to. That’s right, yes?” Revan asked, glancing at Sunrider, who nodded. “I don’t intend to ask you to do something you don’t want to, Juhani, and nor will they.”
“No... I will come,” Juhani said slowly. “I will have to get used to this sooner or later and, besides, I would like to come.”
“Great...” Revan said grinning. “Jolee?”
“Eh?” The old man looked up from the floor he'd been studying. “Me? Sure, I’m coming. I need a stiff drink to cope with what they’ve just dumped on me.” He glared at Sunrider, who just smiled serenely.
“Ahem,” Vreik said from his chair and the group turned to look at him. “We also have decided the missions you need to go on after the party. Bastila, we ask you to go after the two weeks of leave you have requested.”
“What missions do you wish us to undertake, Master?” Bastila asked, looking at Vreik politely.
“Republic Intel has informed us that the Sith 6th fleet is massing to assault one of our primary tabana gas facilities in order to steal it's production. As you know, we still have insufficient ships to go against them without your battle meditation.” He looked at her as she slowly nodded in understanding. “We have four weeks until they move to attack. Dodonna is sending the Republic 8th fleet to defend it and would like you to be on the flagship. You and Jolee need to rendezvous with them two weeks from now. That should give you the time you requested from us and yet still give you time to move the fleet into position.”
“Revan?” Vreik turned to the Jedi, who calmly looked at him. “We have need of your skills also. Unfortunately, they will take you away from Bastila for quite some time. I must also apologize as the situation is desperate and we need you to go in three days.”
Revan looked at Bastila and felt his heart flutter slightly. The look in her eyes mirrored his and he touched her gently. I don't want to go. Maybe we should run away together... we could do the fire, and bed thing.
Bastila sighed; she knew he didn’t mean that, he knew he had a duty as much as she did. She squeezed his hand. No, we can’t escape our duty. I have to go and help the fleet and you have to do what they want. We’ll have to wait until we meet up again to do what I wanted.[/I[ She looked at him, sorrow in her eyes. Being a Jedi is going to be hard if we’re constantly separated like this.
As long as we don’t let it happen that often we'll be fine, he assured her, wishing he felt more certain of it himself. Nothing will keep me from you for long, I promise you that.
With a sigh he turned to Vreik and nodded at the small Master. “Very well, Master, I understand. What is it that you require me to do?”
“The Republic has been assembling small fleets of cargo ships recently, to transport supplies to Taris.” Revan nodded; Mission would be pleased to hear that. “However, the Sith have started to attack the supply lines for their troops. The Republic has lost four supply hauls in the past two days. Worse, the troopers they use are not just ordinary troopers. They are also using Dark Jedi in the assault. We have been asked to support the Republic and have decided to send you with them to ensure the cargo fleets safety. The aid to the survivors on Taris will dry up if we do not and the planet’s remaining population will die. Be careful, however; the reason we are sending you, Revan, is that the cargo haul has had our support already. We sent a group of Jedi with the most recent haul... none survived and the cargo shipment was taken, the ships destroyed. It is our opinion that the Dark Jedi obviously have a Master of great power with them, but no one has seen him or her. Protect the ships, the crew and the supplies. Remember though, a Jedi does not strike in anger.”
“Yes, Master Vreik,” Revan sighed and looked around. “Am I doing this alone?”
“No of course not, young Jedi. Although Bastila and Master Bindo are needed elsewhere, we feel Juhani should accompany you. Also, we are sure your friends on board the Ebon Hawk will be happy to come. The Republic will reward them handsomely for helping protect the crew and cargo.”
“Mission would do it regardless,” Revan said, nodding. “However, Canderous may just feel this is worth his while. I’ll ask him.”
“Very well, young Jedi.” Vreik looked at the group and bowed his head. “We will see you at the party. You may go with our blessing.”
Revan turned to leave and then pausing at an empty chair looked back. “Just one thing Master, if I may.” Vreik glanced up. Sunrider also looked at Revan as she sat down. “Where’s Master Telan?”
“Ah. She was one of the, rather small, group who felt we should punish Bastila and subject you, Revan, to a war tribunal. She has left the Council in protest over our decision.” He sighed at Revan's puzzled expression. “Please do not judge her too harshly. Telan was one of the early victims of the war with Darth Revan. She was captured while on a mission on Korriban and tortured, although she managed to escape. However, what she saw, and was subjected to, have left her a little... conflicted. Despite this, she was and still is a capable Council member. She just needs time.”
“Yes, Master,” Revan said, while part of him sighed inwardly. Poor Telan, another victim of his previous life’s lust for power. Shaking his head, he looked at Vreik and Sunrider. “We’ll go and get ready with, your permission.”
Emotion, yet peace. |
Ignorance, yet knowledge.
Passion, yet serenity.
Chaos, yet harmony.
Death, yet the Force.
|Jedi Striker||Aug 25 2011, 11:42 PM Post #13|
Across Coruscant, near the industrial sector of the northern quadrant of the planet, lay the slum areas. Often forgotten, more usually ignored by the population of Coruscant in general, it remained a place of darkness. It’s dripping alleys and rotting walkways, connected various rundown buildings and flats. It was a place where the police never went, and the local population avoided as much as possible. The local crime syndicates found it perfect, as did other groups who wished to avoid the authorities, to vanish.
Inside a small rotting flat, a female figure sat in front of a well-lit table. The lamp provided the only light in the room; however, the rest of it was covered in dark shadows. In front of her lay a series of components, and in the middle lay a gleaming red crystal. With skilled hands, the figure began to assemble them slowly, pausing only when a tiny knock was heard against the door.
“Yes?” she said quietly. “Come in.”
Her voice was calm, controlled. Yet, to the second female figure that opened the door and stepped into the tiny room, it filled her with dread.
“Master, I have news.” In the shadows, only the voice gave away the arrivals fear. “News that you must hear.”
“Really?” Leaning across to a small control remote, the figure at the bench raised the lighting sufficiently to see the others face and turned. She herself wore a dark red cloak with hood and the face underneath was shadowed despite the light. “And what would that be, Telan... my reluctant apprentice?”
“The... the Council has seen Padawan Bastila Shan and Revan.” Telan looked at the shadowy figure as she began to fiddle with the components on the table. “As we suspected, Master, they are romantically involved.”
“I see.” The red crystal was plucked by two gloved fingers and slipped into a small cradle. “I take it then, that you managed to have Bastila removed from the Jedi Order? That was the sole reason for you being there.”
Telan looked at her with fear and apprehension. Shifting her body weight so that her saber hilt swung closer to her hand, she cleared her throat, “N... no, Master.” Telan swallowed, as the fingers paused in their movements. “It wasn't my fault! Revan was there. He somehow got Bastila to allow him to be Honor Bearer! I couldn’t get through to the other Council members with him standing there, calm and collected. He’s totally changed and they saw that! Because of him, they’ve let her go on all charges. She’s actually been thanked for helping him, despite her fall to the dark side!”
“Mm. You were supposed to stop that from happening, we knew that could be a possibility.” The female figure took the assembled crystal structure and slipped it slowly into a well tooled cylinder. “The Sith do not appreciate failure, Telan, and you have failed.”
“I know, Master.” Telan swallowed and knelt down on one knee. “Forgive me, I beg of you. It wasn’t my fault! I couldn’t have known how much support he would have from the leaders of the Council. They tipped the balance in his favor.”
“Do they know that you are working for us?” The assembled structure was turned upside down and the bottom gently unscrewed, power units added. “Do they know anything of our operations here?”
“No, Master. The discipline you taught me helped mask my allegiance to you and the Sith. Besides, my capture and abuse at Korriban helps explain away any unusual behavior.”
“Good.” The figure picked up the now assembled lightsaber and with a gentle press, the blade snapped into existence. With a few swings, the figure nodded and turned back to Telan. “We will have to give them something to focus on, to lure them away from our true intent.”
The figure clipped the saber to her belt and the gloved hands pushed the table away. Getting up, she walked across to Telan and reaching out, stroked her hair gently. Telan flinched at her touch, memories slipping into her mind, and the figure smiled.
“Where are they going to be tonight?”
“The Senate of the republic is throwing an ‘official’ celebration party for them. They are going to be officially presented with Cross of Glory by the Chancellor.”
“Interesting.” Telan watched her stroke her shadowed chin. “Tell me, do you have an invitation? Do you have any clearance codes to this party?”
“I have been invited, Master. Why?”
The figure stroked her hair once more and kneeled down to look at her shivering face. Telan looked at the terrible gleam in the dark eyes and wanted to turn away, but she found she couldn’t.
“Well, I think it’s time to prove your worth to me once more. I want you to give Revan and Bastila a little present from me. It will help mask our true intentions from anyone watching and will give you my favor once more.”
“Me, Master?' Telan shivered again and looked at her. “What present?”
The figure grinned and leaning forwards whispered into her ear. Telan’s eyes widened in horror and she looked at the cloaked figure with apprehension.
“Me? Please, Master. I... I will do as you say, but...”
“Good. If you accomplish your task, get back here... I will let you assume the role of apprentice officially, including all the power that comes with it.”
Telan looked at her and felt the hunger for power swell in her breast. She nodded and the dark figure stood once more, waving Telan up with her hand.
“Go. Show them the power of the Sith, my apprentice.”
Telan turned and walked quickly away from the figure and out the door. With a sigh, the Sith turned back to the small table and clicked the remote on it once more. With a gentle glow, a hologram of Revan at Lehon flickered into existence. The newscaster that droned on in the background, announcing the redemption, ignored. Slowly, the Sith woman kneeled down and feeling under the chair she had sat on, pulled a box gently from under it. With a gentle click the top slid open and she pulled the clothing inside it, out, with an appreciative look. Glancing once more at the figure of Revan, now joined by his friends, the Sith pulled the hood back. In the dark of the room, her red eyes gleamed.
“It begins, Revan. It begins now.”
* * *
“I hate parties,” Revan grumbled. “Look at them, all staring at me as though I'm going to suddenly fry them all with Force Lightning!”
Bastila watched him, amused. The hall the Senate had decided to hold the reception and victory party in was huge. Balconies ran around the walls in three tiers and the floor space was large enough to house the Hawk four times over. The party guests were numerous and the swirl of people mingling, laughing and chatting amused her as she felt the Force swirl with various emotions. Reaching down to the table, Bastila plucked a couple of Denebian brandies from its wide selection and handed one to him. With a gentle sip, she felt the alcohol in the brandy warm her throat. She would have to limit herself; it wasn't the done thing for a Jedi to be drunk.
“The others are worse, though. Eight people so far, heralding me as the greatest hero the Republic has ever seen! They seem to forget I'm Darth Revan, the most vicious Sith Lord since Exar Kun.”
“Were Darth Revan,” Bastila murmured at him absently, as she stared at a suspicious canapé in her hand. She got a look of annoyance in response and sighed. “What do you expect? I know it’s hard, my love, but you’ll just have to take it in your stride.”
“Oh yes? Well then, mind explaining why I’ve had ten people asking me where the Lady Shan has gone? Wanting to congratulate her on helping me defeat the Sith, but she’s nowhere to be found?” He grinned at her innocent expression and felt his own spirits lift. She always knew how to make him smile, especially with the bond working its usual magic. “Wish I’d thought of tactful mingling. Mind you, I suppose there’s one person who feels more uncomfortable than me.”
Bastila glanced across at the figure of Juhani standing against the wall of the reception hall. The Cathar’s fur was raised slightly and her yellow eyes flickered around the large group of people, looking for potential threats.
“Maybe I should go and talk to her,” she said softly, watching as Juhani backed away slightly from a group of senators wishing to congratulate her. “Yes, I think I should.”
“Fine, go help Ju.” Revan watched as another group of Senators wandered over to him, the woman leading the group had a determined expression on her face and he sighed. “I think at the moment I may be about to receive a less than enamored party.”
Bastila glanced across at the group and her eyes widened. “Maybe I should stay.”
“No, I agree with you. Go help Juhani cope, before she either runs away or loses her temper. I’ll be fine.” Bastila nodded and quietly walked across to the Cathar, who glanced up with relief at her approach. Revan reached into his pocket and pulled a comm from it. “HK?”
“Query: Yes, master?”
“Status report please.”
“Statement: T3 and myself are occupying the security office as you requested, master. I can see you and Lady Bastila clearly on the security cams.” The droid paused and a tone of longing slipped into his voice. “Do you wish me to activate the crowd suppression system on the group approaching?”
Revan sighed. “No. I actually called to tell you not to do that, and not to react to anything that happens in here okay? None of these people are here to kill me.”
“Comment: An assassin, master, is unlikely to parade the fact that he or she is here to do so. Please tell me you are only drinking from unopened and randomly selected bottles.”
“Yes. I’ll also promise to be careful when I greet anyone, my saber is on my belt! Okay?”
“Reluctant supplication: Very well, I shall remain here and observe people entering the party instead, master. Will that please you?”
“Yes, thanks, HK. T3, keep an eye on him will you?”
“Annoyance: I do not need a smug garbage can as a chaperone, master. I will obey your orders, as I always have!”
“Fine, fine. I’ve got to go.” Revan snapped off the comm unit as the group finally reached him. He picked up his glass and watched as they bickered amongst themselves, before woman who had led them stepped up. She was human, in her mid thirties and had a hard face, softened by light blue hair.
“So. Lord Revan, yes?”
“I used to be Darth Revan once.” He looked at her over the rim of his glass and sipped. “I’m Jedi Knight Revan now.”
“A Harket beast doesn’t change its spots for long,” the woman snapped and he sighed inwardly. Damn. The woman narrowed her eyes at his lack of response. “I personally wish you to know that I, of the house of Terat, will not let you go unpunished.”
“Really?” Revan looked at her and felt a twinge of guilt that made Bastila glance across from where she was calming a nervous Juhani and sighed. Revan shook his head and turned to the woman. “The discovery that I was once a mass murdering disciple of evil, who lost everything that he was, isn’t enough for you then?”
The woman frowned at him and he watched her anger grow. Maybe that wasn’t the best thing to say...
No. But then she’s itching for a fight. Her planet, Mutrok Three, was a victim of Revan’s Sith forces... I should come back, Bastila whispered in his mind.
Is Juhani calm enough to be left on her own? I can see another group coming towards her.
No. I suppose I’ll stay with her. Try to remain calm, she wants you to get angry... she’s trying to prove you’re still Darth Revan inside, and getting angry will fuel her determination.
You really are good at this negotiation stuff.
I try my best. Be careful and stay calm.
Yes, honey, he thought and grinned at her slight, almost immediately banished, annoyance.
“I have to tell you, Revan that I was one of the Senate members who voted for you to face war crimes.” She looked at him, her body taking a defensive stance. “What do you have to say to that?”
“Well, you’d want me to face a war crimes tribunal, you would have to fill me in about each crime. I don’t remember anything about my past, a few flashes that wake me in the night sweating, a few tastes and smells that bring stuff back... but Revan is gone, and I’m here now.”
“I refuse to believe that!” she snapped, feeling her audience beginning to lose interest in the face of his honesty. “You wiped out my world! You were the most evil man in the galaxy, despite what you did before in the Mandalorian Wars. I don’t know how the Jedi trust you, I never will. I hate you and promise that I will someday see you on trial for what you have done!”
Revan sighed and looked at her with pity. “I’m sorry, madam.”
“What?” the woman asked in disbelief. “What did you say?”
“I said I’m sorry. It’s all I have to give you, all I can give.” She opened her mouth, an angry retort on her lips and he held up a hand. “I can’t give you what you want, my regret at the destruction of your world. I can’t, because I don’t remember. For the last time, and please understand, I have almost no recollection of who I was. I am the Revan you see now, and it’s who I will be from now on. Please believe me also, when I say I don’t want to remember what it was like being Revan.” He glanced at Bastila and felt a lump in his throat. “He must have been a very lonely man...”
“I hate you,” the senator said, looking away. “I hate you because you remind me of what I’ve lost. My father, my mother... my husband.”
Revan felt the lump in his throat grow and it was only the soothing balm of Bastila’s gentle reassurance that made him stand there, that let him watch the senators sorrow.
“Revan?” He turned and found Mission standing there, her drink in hand, young face apprehensive. “What's go'in on?”
“Nothing, Mission. You don’t want to be here.” He watched her brow furrow; the kid was sometimes too smart for her own good. “Leave, Mish, I'll deal with this.”
“How can you follow him?” The senator turned to her with a look of horror and her shoulders shuddered, almost as if she wanted to shake the young teenager. “I know all about you, Mission Vao, I read your bio on the holonet. How can you follow the man who created Malak, the man who blew your home world into dust?”
Mission’s face darkened and Revan watched the young woman clutch the glass in her hand so tightly, that the stem snapped with a tiny cracking sound. He was about to pull her back from the senator when she stepped forward.
“Listen up, you!” The senator stepped back in surprise at Mission’s angry tone. “Revan is one of the few people who actually give a damn about me! Okay, so who he was turned Malak to the dark side, but he didn't have to carry on down the path! It was Malak who blew up my home, you’re right there, but what did my Revan have to do with that? Nothing, it was all Malak’s fault.”
“That man blew up my home, young woman!”
“No! Darth Revan did. My Revan is not the same person, so back off or I’ll smack you so hard, you’ll be in a med-bay for a month!”
“Mission, step away,” Revan warned, watching the senator’s face turn purple. “Go and see what Jolee is doing, will you?”
Mission stood, her young hands clenched into fists and ready to strike. Reaching out, Revan touched her shoulder and the young Twi’lek flinched slightly and looked at him. He cocked his head at her and, with a sigh, Mission nodded and backed off.
As Revan turned back to the irate and glowering senator, a sudden shiver in the Force made him look up sharply. All his senses were screaming at him, warning of danger and he felt his hand flick to his saber, much to the horror of the senator, who backed away from him at speed.
“What the...” she began and he ignored her.
A sudden feeling or horror and shock flowed into him from Bastila and he felt her sudden, urgent scream slam into him along the bond.
Emotion, yet peace. |
Ignorance, yet knowledge.
Passion, yet serenity.
Chaos, yet harmony.
Death, yet the Force.
|Jedi Striker||Aug 25 2011, 11:42 PM Post #14|
The world to him slowed as his mind, jumping at Bastila’s feeling of terror, slammed him into accelerated Force Speed. The senator’s body moved through time like toffee and Revan span, just in time to see a slow spinning red blur scything towards him, and in consequence, her. Turning back, he launched himself at the woman. Her face managed to register just a tiny tremor of shock before his weight slammed into her, knocking them to the ground. The blur, and a saber thrown with the Force whipped over his head and he felt the heat from its energy blade, smelt the ozone from it's passage and heard the “vwhip, vwhip” sound as it span.
Bastila had also slipped into Force Speed and he saw her running even as the blade slipped past him. Her own dual bladed saber ignited with a snap and he watched her fling it smoothly in a direct reversal of the red blade’s passage, managing effortlessly to leap out the way as the blade smashed into a table of food, cutting it in half. Her yellow blur of a saber zipped past his head, and he turned to follow its passage. It swung upwards into the first tier of balconies and a sudden scream echoed around the hall as a figure, clothed in black, fell – its right arm missing.
Just as everyone heard the sickening crunch as the body hit the floor, the main doors to the hallway slammed open and a dozen Sith Jedi ran in yelling battle cries. Picking himself up off the floor, Revan’s dual saber snapped into life. Even as he ran up the steps to meet the Sith strike force, he felt Bastila next to him, her own blade whipping back into her hand from the balcony. A sudden familiar battle cry made him glance up to see Juhani’s lithe body whip past him in the air. Her own blade came slamming down into the body of one of the Dark Jedi on the left and he crumpled with a scream.
Two came running towards him, and he concentrated on centering himself as their dark blades slammed onto his, fiery sparks crashing off his own as it deflected the lethal energy. A Force Push slammed one of them into the wall, and he concentrated on dueling with the other, even as Bastila moved to engage two trying to get behind him. The Jedi he fought was good, very good, but not nearly good enough. Using the skill he knew he possessed thanks to his former dark self, Revan parried and thrust equally to his opponent. A sudden mistake by the Dark Jedi made him reverse his grip on the hilt and spin his own saber in a flurry of energy. With a scream, the Jedi collapsed and he looked round to hear a similar cry from Juhani and Bastila’s opponents.
Even as the Jedi they had fought collapsed, more attacked the two women, who calmly began to parry and thrust. Revan was about to assist Bastila, when another figure walked in from the doorway. Clad in black, a facemask covering its face, the figure pointed at Revan and ignited a dual saber blade. The red glow hissed into the marble as it drew a battle line and taunted him. Slowly, carefully, he approached the figure and raising his blade, began to dance a dangerous ballet.
Their sabers smashed into each other with such force, that the sparks blasted off the blades in a massive shower. Revan dodged, as a cunning sweep from his opponent scythed where his heart had been, and he countered by parrying and flipping the blade upwards in a spin. The figure dodged backwards and Revan flipped his saber against his opponent’s once more.
With each parry and attack, the two Jedi, one dark one light, had to employ more and more cunning measures to catch the other off guard. Finally, Revan played his most cunning trick. He span his saber in a circle in front of him, allowing it to act as a shield of saber energy, as he walked backwards away from his opponent. Pushed back by the ferocious wall of energy, the figure also stepped backwards, raising its saber in a defensive gesture. This was what Revan had been waiting for.
With a snap, one of his blades vanished and he dashed at his opponent. It raised its dual blade triumphantly in a vicious swing, designed to take off his head... he wasn’t there. As the figure had raised the blade to swing it, Revan had slipped to the floor and slid along the marble surface on his knees. The single blade stabbed upwards, and met no defensive parries, as the figure was unable to turn the dual blades fast enough to block Revan's. With a scream that betrayed the figure as female, his opponent crumbled to the floor, a neat, cauterised puncture wound in the middle of her stomach.
Looking up, he realized that Bastila and Juhani had made short work of the remaining Sith Jedi, while Masters Vreik and Sunrider also had a few bodies around them, Sunrider was clutching at her arm and Jolee was binding it gently with some ripped tablecloth. She sighed and gripped him for support, Revan grinned despite his exhaustion; trust Jolee...
A sudden movement made him look around, only to see one of the Sith Jedi picking up a fallen blaster from the floor. Even as the Sith pointed it in his direction, the snub nose of a blaster rifle poked the side of his head and the Sith looked up, into the glowing eyes of the red droid holding the gun.
“Statement: Go-ahead, meatbag... make my day!” HK looked at his master with concern, only relaxing as he got up and began to dust himself off. “Statement: I do not wish to appear smug, master... but I told you so.”
“So you did,” Revan muttered and felt Bastila's hand curl around his. He looked at his soul mate with a smile, knowing from the bond that she was unhurt. “Well, this was quite a party, but I’m not paying to have the mess cleaned up.”
“Who were you fighting?” Juhani asked, as Bastila smiled. “I’ve never seen skills like that, it was... quite astonishing, from both of you.”
“I don't know.” Revan kneeled gently in front of the still body, and began to tug at the mask. “I can only suggest we have a look.”
He yanked at the mask unsuccessfully until Bastila pointed out a small clasp at the side. With a snick, it slid off the still form’s face and Revan's eyes widened in shock, along with Bastila’s gasp of horror. Juhani looked at the two of them, puzzled.
“What is it?” her soft purring voice asked. Revan looked at her and his mouth opened, then closed again. “What? Do you know her?”
Vreik and Sunrider walked up with Jolee at that point and Sunrider gasped in shock.
“Telan?” She looked at Revan, at Vreik and clutched her arm tightly. “It was Telan who attacked us? Why?”
“I... I suppose she was in league with the Sith...” Revan shook his head, unable to cope with this. Suddenly, a thought struck him. “How much did she know about the mission the Council wanted us to go on? How much did she know about Bastila’s mission?”
“All,” Vreik's voice was sad, filled with regret as he stared at the lifeless body. “She must have been turned at Korriban, a spy in the heart of the Council. This really does smell as one of Darth Revan’s ideas.”
Revan sighed. “If she knew what we were going to do... No, the 6th fleet will still attack the gas mines, it’s too tempting to pass, even with Bastila helping to protect the fleet.” He thought for a second, his own tactical brain pondering the problem. “But I bet they have orders to attack the ship she was assigned to, no matter the cost. You need to change the flagship and have Bastila placed on that.”
“And you?” Vreik asked quietly. “What about your mission?”
“I’m not leaving that cargo undefended. It’s needed on Taris and that’s where it’s going. I’ll be fine, I’ve got Juhani, Canderous, Mission and my loyal bodyguard.” HK stiffened with pleasure. “No, I’ll just have to be much more careful.”
With a sigh, Revan looked at the body of Telan and felt things getting out of hand. Nudging the lightsaber she’d used with his foot, he looked at his friends and then at the Jedi Masters, the rest of the partygoers giving the group a wide berth.
“What the hell is going on?”
“I’m going to miss you.” He felt her unhappiness, her desire to be with him. “I so wanted to have some time with you before I had to go to the fleet.”
“We’ll see each other again soon, honey.” Revan stroked the strand of hair that had fallen across her eyes. “I meant what I said, nothing will keep you from me for too long.”
“I know.” Bastila leaned into him and savored his warmth. “But that doesn’t mean that the days won't be agony.”
* * *
The two of them stood outside the Hawk’s loading ramp and the crisp morning air slithered around them. The Hawk had been moved to the Jedi Temple’s launching platforms and stood battered but proud amongst the tiny fighters and transports. They had to go soon, the cargo haul was ready to go and that meant Revan and his crew had to leave. Bastila sighed. After the party, she’d hoped she and Revan would have some time for each other, but they’d both been exhausted. Revan had fallen onto his bunk fully clothed, and she’d joined him with a groan. It had been a full eight hours of sleep before she stirred, to find him holding a cup of caffa in front of her with a sad smile.
“Morning, Bastila. It’s... well, two hours before we leave. I’ve got to get ready and help Mission stock the Hawk’s provisions. I’ll... I’ll leave you to freshen up.”
He’d quickly walked out, obviously upset about leaving her and she’d drunk her caffa quietly, thinking. While she’d been in the fresher, scrubbing her hair, she wondered how long it would be before they had a chance to get together again.
“Agony? Well, I’ll just have to comm you a lot to keep it at bay,” his voice dragged her back to the present and she smiled at him sadly. “Ah, don’t look at me like that, Bast, this is hard enough.”
“Sorry, just thinking,” she sighed and ran a hand across his chest. “When we get together again, can we... can we make our first night special somehow?”
“Special?” He smiled at her. “Well, we can try... what did you have in mind?”
“I’ll let you know,” she whispered kissing him. “When I can think of something, I’ll tell you.”
“I want at least two messages a week from you,” Revan whispered, burying his face in her hair and smelling the spicy hair cleanser that formed part of her. “I’ll do the same, I promise.”
“Oh?” Bastila ran her hands along his back and then slightly lower, he grinned. “I’ll keep you to that promise, Jedi Revan.”
“Rev, we have to go,” Mission's voice echoed from the Hawk’s crew lounge. “The cargo haulers are moving into position.”
“Okay.” With a final sigh, Revan bent forwards and kissed his soul mate one final time, feeling her exuberance at his kiss flow into him. “Damn it.”
“Go,” she whispered at him, pulling back. “I’ll see you soon.”
With a final touch of her hair, Revan walked up the walkway and was about to hit “ascend and pressurize” when a voice cried out from across the platform.
“Jedi Revan, wait! I have fresh orders from the Council.”
A young female Padawan ran up to the Hawk followed just as quickly by a less flustered female Master. Revan looked at them both and cocked his head.
“Yes?” he asked with a smile at her huffing face.
“I’m... I’m Selyne Hirana. I've been assigned to you as Padawan learner and aid to you during this mission.” The young woman collapsed against the Hawk’s metal body.
“Padawan?” Revan growled and glanced at Bastila, who shrugged. With a sigh, he motioned for the young woman to come abroad and glanced at the Master, as she too stood next to the Hawk’s open hatchway. “And you are?”
“Jedi Master Quatra. I’ve been assigned to assist you as well. The Council does not feel you were safe enough without a Master to assist you. I’m here to help you take on any Sith Jedi we meet, although it’s still your show Jedi Revan.”
“Quatra?” Revan said in surprise. “As in the Quatra who trained Juhani?”
“Why yes.” Quatra smiled. “Do you know her? She can be a little quick to anger, but I understand someone helped her through that... although my knowledge is hazy, I’ve not been to Dantooine for ages.”
“Well, this should be fun,” He murmured, motioning her to come aboard. “If you want a surprise, I suggest you bunk in the rear compartment, we’ll all get to know one another later, okay?”
“Oh?” with a nod Quatra slipped past him into the Hawk.
Bastila stood alone on the platform and she felt her eyes moisten at his face. “Bye, my love. Take care.”
“I will.” He pressed the button and then as the hatch started to close and the Hawk whined into lift-off, threw a small envelope at her.
“A gift, Bastila. A thanks for your love and support.” As the hatch slipped closed, Bastila stared at the envelope and began to open it.
With a hum of power, the repulsars of the ship activated and its bulk began to slide into the air. Bastila paid it no heed, for in her hand lay a credit chip and a small note. With shaking hands, she opened the small piece of paper.
For you, because I love you. Your mother and you have much to discuss, to catch up on and it's the least I can do. She needs a rare drug... she knows which one. It was so expensive she didn't want to tell you, as she was scared you'd bankrupt yourself trying to pay for it. This chip has enough to pay for the whole course. I don't know how long it will give her, maybe only a few months at the worst... but I hope it's enough time. Take care of yourself my love.
She looked up and watched the Hawk’s bulk slowly begin to ascend into the atmosphere. Her eyes, already moist from his leaving her, began to trickle tears down her face, tears of joy. He knew she’d never have accepted this if he’d stayed so he’d left her no choice. As the Hawk roared into full power and quickly vanished into a dot she smiled sadly.
'Revan, I owe you for this.' She thought and felt his laughter in her head.
'Owe me? Bast, you've given me you. What more could I possibly ask for?'
'I can't take this, it's too much!' She complained at him.
'Uh, uh. That chip is coded for your personal bank account. Use it to help Helena, you've been through a hell of a lot lately. Take this gift and use it, please.'
'Alright.' She sighed and felt his love for her warm her body. 'I don't know how I'm going to get this past mother though. She'll more likely kill you than hug you, when she finds out you gave me the money.'
'Well, how else am I going to ask her for your hand in marriage later?'
Her eyes widened with delight and she felt him touch her gently.
'Anyway, I'm getting ahead of myself. Go, use the chip, and sort out your relationship with her. I've got to go.'
'I love you with all my heart.' Bastila whispered finally, her hand clutching the chip tightly. 'May the force be with you, my love.'
'Go. I'll see you soon. I love you too.'
With a gentle sigh she felt him pull back from the bond and it slowly whisper into a general group of emotions and life force. He would always be with her, but right now, she wished he were holding her.
Bastila looked at the spire of Shintaka hospital in the distance, and then at the chip with anxiety. How the hell was she going to explain this to her mother? Mind you, how dare she not tell her there was a possible drug that could help her. With a groan of reluctance, she tucked the chip into her robe and walked off the platform.
"Here we go..."
Emotion, yet peace. |
Ignorance, yet knowledge.
Passion, yet serenity.
Chaos, yet harmony.
Death, yet the Force.
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