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| How We Became Fire; James short story | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: September 2, 2010, 5:12 am (19,017 Views) | |
| Scorpion Flower | January 31, 2011, 12:45 pm Post #271 |
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Outlaw Torn
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“Why are we leaving so late?” Marcella shouted as she ran towards the private jet that would serve as our traveling toy during the week we had ahead. “Because we can sleep during the night sweetie.” James shouted at her. “She’s so excited.” I said as we walked side by side. James and I were still working on our relationship. We didn’t kiss again after that time in his room let alone getting more intimate but we were close and getting closer every day. We were bonding and connecting more every day. I was more and more relaxed and he was doing everything he could to win me back completely. I hadn’t give myself to him already because it still hurt and blurred my vision and judgment imagining him with another woman. I tried to hold on to Francesca’s words and think that he loved me but my head wasn’t easy that way. I had a tough background and that made everything tough for me but I would get there. My unexpected pregnancy and my sudden flu pulled us closer again and there we were fighting for our relationship with everything we had. With our souls, with our bodies, with our minds and with our hearts in the name of the love we felt for each other. “Let me hold you hand.” He said stretching his hand at me. I took it with mine and our fingers entwined perfectly. Our hands fitted perfectly just like a puzzle piece. Like I was a puzzle that was incomplete with a piece missing and James was that missing piece. “Every time you want to do something are you going to ask me?” I told him. He had been closer to me but since the kiss and him leaving the room fast he had been avoiding contact and when he wanted to do it he’d always ask. “I don’t know if you want it.” He said serious and sighing. Maybe I should have had that conversation with him sooner but the fact that we reached the jet left our conversation frozen in that moment. James gave me a quick glance and then got in and I followed him. I laughed seeing Marcella all ready to take off, sat and with seat belt fasten already. “You are quick.” I said tapping her head smiling at her. “London is awesome. I can’t wait to get there and I love to see daddy play.” I looked back at James who giggled proudly at his daughter’s remark. I sat next to James on the opposite side of the jet leaving Marcella with a whole corridor just for her. She was incredibly happy to have all that just for her. “Can I pull the seat back dad?” She asked. “No, you have to wait until we’re safe in the air ok? Until then you have to keep your seat straight. “She’s going to fall asleep right away.” I spoke to him. “You bet.” The engines of the jet roared and Marcella clapped happily. James got up and checked his daughters seat belt and then returned fastening his own. The jet began to move approaching the runway and it stopped waiting for the orders of the tower. It took a couple of minutes and then the engines worked faster and stronger and it began to move again, gaining speed as the pilot pushed the engines to the limit. After a few seconds the nose of the jet pointed the sky and we took off. I saw the lights of San Francisco disappearing into the deep darkness of the sky. Soon a bip and a green light warned us it was safe to free ourselves from the seat belts. “Cella, you can free yourself.” James warned her. A woman brought us blankets and pillows and then she asked us if we wanted to watch a movie meanwhile to which we agreed. Marcella pushed her seat back and she covered herself, we saw her yawning after a few seconds. “Are you going to sleep?” I teased her. “NOOO…” She said making a serious face. “I am going to watch the movie.” She said. I shook my head, of course she was. The film started and after five minutes I looked at her and she was passed out on her sleep. I got up to tuck her in better and adjust her pillow and her head that was falling down the seat and then I came back to my seat next to my love. James and I also pushed our seats back and adjusted the pillows under our heads, we covered ourselves with the blanket and we put our eyes on the screen. His hand searched for mine under the cover and I took it pleased. He didn’t ask he simply did it. I turned my head to look at him but he was concentrated looking at the movie. His fingers caressed my hand as the movie went on and when it was over I thought I had the perfect opportunity to continue the conversation we had began before we got in the plane. “James“…” I called him. He turned around on his side and looked at me. I did the same and we spoke really close to each other. The vision of his blue gaze and his lips so close blurred my thinking a little but I tried to clear my mind and continue. “back to what we were talking before we got in the plane…” I said. “Yes…” He said waiting for me to continue. I locked my gaze on his lips as they moved while he spoke the short word. I was getting insane. “Well you said you didn’t know if I wanted it.” I said putting the ball on his hands. “Maybe I didn’t use the right words.” He said. My gaze locked on his lips as they moved again. They moved in slow motion, they looked incredibly delicious and tasty. I looked up to his eyes to divert my desire. I was dying to kiss him. “Explain…” I asked. “I know we are trying and I am incredibly happy about it and I love you A LOT but I am afraid if I caress you that you reject me. I can’t take that rejection from you.” “Have I rejected you before? I asked for your caress.” “But you were ill, fragile, just found out your were pregnant, you know…” “And you think that since I got better I didn’t want it anymore?” I smiled and ran a hand through his face. “You also backed off…” He whispered with his eyes closed simply enjoying the caress of my hand. “I am sorry.” I said. “It wasn’t on purpose.” He opened his eyes and dragged himself a little closer clouding my vision from any decent judgment. “and I am still pregnant…” I added running my hand up through his hair. He smiled at me and that determined my death sentence. I pulled myself even closer and I kissed his lips with one simple kiss and then I opened my eyes to look at him. Our noses touching, James took his hand to my face and tugged on the back of my neck pulling me to him again and it was his turn to kiss my lips. I missed his kiss so much. He strayed and traced the lines of my face with his finger and then came back to kiss me again. Our lips united and our tongues entwined deepening the kiss. His hand traveled under the covers and rested on my hips pulling me closer to him. We broke the kiss a few seconds to breathe and then we kissed again. I felt his fingers squeezing me gently on my waist and I ventured mine under his shirt. I felt my blood racing and boiling, my skin was burning and the adrenaline rushed as our kisses intensified. I came to my senses and I pulled him away but gently. “Cella is right there.” I whispered. James rolled on top of me and bit my chin sending shivers over my body. “She’s a heavy sleeper.” He hushed in my ear nibbling at the same time. I wasn’t ready yet. I pulled his head up from my neck and looked at him in the eye. “I am sorry…” I said. The disappointment in his eyes crushed me. He came back to his seat in silence. “I’m not ready yet.” I said ready to caress his face but he turned it away from my hand. “James…” I called him. “It’s ok…I am fine.” He said but he didn’t look at me. “Talk to me…” I asked. He looked at me. “What do you want me to tell you? You set me on fire and then you back away, I am not made of stone Ade.” “Are you mad at me?” “Yes!” He said but then he closed his eyes and sighed. “No…” He corrected but I knew he was, he just didn’t want to tell me. He was craving to have sex with me and was frustrated ‘cause he knew it would take some time. I dragged myself to him and covered us up with the blanket, even covered our heads. “What are you doing?” He asked me. “Shuuuu…” I said grabbing his jaw with my hand as I began to kiss him again. James broke the kiss. “Ade…please…” He said. I couldn’t give him the full show but I thought I could give him a little something. I kissed him again taking my hand to his belt, he gasped against my lips. Never breaking the kiss I unbuttoned his jeans and unzipped it. I shivered when I touched him so hard. James grabbed my hand. “You don’t have to do this.” He whispered. His voice shaking a bit. “I want to do this.” I said silencing him with my lips again. Next move I pulled him free. One of his hands tugging gently at the back of my neck and the other on my waist. His grip firm as my hand began to work on him and his kiss changed to a frantic pace. I broke the kiss to let him breathe properly and rested my forehead against his. “What do you want me to do?” I asked him. “Go a little faster.” He said out of breath and so I did. I speed a bit my hand and a moan escaped his lips. “Like that…” He said. “Shuuuu…” I said kissing his lips. “Do you want to wake up your daughter?” He smiled while his fingers pressured my skin. He moaned low against my lips and kissed me again. “Oh Ade…” He said rocking his hips against my hand. I was incredibly turned on doing that, I was actually enjoying it. I wished I could have seen him better but we were almost in the dark and even more with the blankets over our heads. His hand tugged mine to build a new rhythm and his other hand pulled me down to him one more time, he ravished my lips. What a killer kiss. “Oh god…” He whispered almost desperately. “It’s ok babe.” I said in his ear. Our hands together building up a speed of magic and them he jerked and he let go of my hand. “Fuck…” He said as I felt my hand wet and I stroke him until the last drop then I searched for my tissues and cleaned both of us. I did the complete job. James pulled me to him and uncovered our heads. “With time I’ll be ready.” I told him. “I just miss you.” He said. “Dad…” We heard a voice calling him, we looked at each other. “Shit, was she awake?” James asked surprised. “Yes sweetie.” He said loud. “Are we there yet?” She asked. “No, not yet. Go back to sleep.” With the poor light we were able to see Marcella going back to sleep. “Do you think she heard us?” He asked me. “I don’t think so. We better get some sleep too.” I suggested. James kissed my lips and closed his eyes. “Sleep well love” He said. “I love you.” I whispered. I felt his fingers squeezing mine gently. We landed in London at 5.30 pm, local time. There was a car waiting for us outside the airport that took us to the hotel. Marcella was hypnotized looking at the street and I was distracted myself. I loved London and I couldn’t ignore that we were together in the city where we first met. I smiled. “Memories?” He asked in my ear. “We met here remember?” “Of course I do.” “How many dates are you playing here?” “Two. Tomorrow and the day after.” “Ok…” I said looking back out of the window. I saw Hyde Park passing by, Harrods and then Piccadilly Circus and just right after the car stopped in front of the hotel, when I got out the car I looked amazed at it. James grabbed my hand. “Remember?” He asked. He had just taken me to the hotel where we met little more than a year before. |
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| 4everJamie | January 31, 2011, 3:36 pm Post #272 |
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Some Kind Of Monster
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Sorry.... I.......I..... I´m speechless![]()
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| xlau05 | January 31, 2011, 4:10 pm Post #273 |
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Blackened
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Ooooh they're getting close like before I think it's good that they're back where they first met ![]() amazing chapter
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| Scorpion Flower | February 1, 2011, 11:42 am Post #274 |
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Outlaw Torn
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James took care of our check in while I waited with Marcella near the elevators. There were some Paparazzi near the door and I tried to avoid their cameras as much as I could. When he had everything done James approached us with a smile. “We can go.” He said pushing the button. “A hotel room just for me.” Marcella praised with her eyes shinning and we laughed. When we reached the 11th floor she ran out of the elevator and asked for the number of the room. “1107.” James told her and she began to ran along the corridor until she stopped in front of the right door. “Here.” She said clapping her hands. James ran the key card and opened the door to a huge suite. Two rooms separated by a living room. Marcella ran to the right side shouting that was her room making us laugh again. “Wow… it’s huge. This is gonna be fun. Wow…and I have my own bathroom. Alright!” We heard her as she made her first contact with her room. “She’s electric.” James turned to me with a sweet smile on his lips. “What are we going to do?” I asked him. James kissed my lips slowly. I knew what he wanted to do but I couldn’t give him that and also Marcella ran into the living room. “Ewwww…”She said making a funny face. “You guys are disgusting1” She added. “Are we?” James said with a grin and throwing his paws on her tickling her belly making her giggle like crazy. “Stop daddy…stop…” She begged out of breath. Marcella struggled to breathe and laugh at the same time and James threw her on the couch and attacked her again. Then he just stopped picking her up on his arms and kissing her. Marcella clutched onto his neck still giggling and catching her breath. “We are going out for dinner.” He said looking at me putting his daughter back on the ground. “Cool…going out at night.” Exclaimed Marcella. “Ok…I just need a shower and to change my clothes.” I said. “I want to have a shower too.” Said James. “And I want to swim in the tub.” Said Marcella. “Do you want me to help you Cella?” I asked her. “No Ade. Thanks.” She said running and disappearing behind her bedroom’s door. James tugged his index finger on the waist of my jeans and pulled me to him surrounding my waist with his inked arms and kissing my cheek. “You go ahead with the shower too. I am going to check with Zach if they were able to fix the sound at the venue and then I’ll come back.” James gave me another kiss and let go of me grabbing the key card to the room. He put it in his back pocket. “I’ll be right back” He said. I nodded and he closed the door behind him. “Cella is everything alright?” I shouted from her door. “Yes Ade.” I heard her voice. I could only imagine the mess that was in the bathroom. A 8 years old having her own party alone in a huge tub. I smiled and went to my room. I opened my suitcase and chose a dress to put on for that night. A silk black dress opened in my back and I also picked the matching high hell black sandals. I stretched the dress on the bed and it was my turn to party on the tub. Only I wasn’t a kid anymore and I had a real kid to help after so I just showered even though I wanted to melt in that tub and relax. Shower was fresh enough though and the strawberry gel left a wonderful aroma in my skin. I rolled my hair in a towel and then another one on my body and walked up to my room finding James coming in. “Is she still in the tub?” I asked him but his eyes were distracted with my naked figure as I let the towel fall on the floor to get dressed. “James…” I called and then I smiled. “I am talking to you.” “Yes, I think she is.” He said. “Aren’t you going shower?” He nodded walking up to the bathroom. I didn’t venture going close to him wearing nothing. I got dressed and then I went to the bathroom to dry my hair. I saw his figure in the shower, he was standing still under the water with his face turned up. It seemed to him like he was thinking and didn’t even notice my presence. Then he lowered his head facing his feet, leaned with his hands on the wall and let the water fall on his back. I gulped watching his sexy show, I just felt like going under the water with him. I turned the dryer on and James looked at me. “I didn’t hear you coming in.” He said smiling. God… His skin shinning wet, drops of water down his body, his hair slicked back wet and tiny drops of water falling from his lips was just too much. “You look beautiful.” He said commenting my dress. “Thanks.” I smiled at him. James closed the water and picked up a towel and ran it over his body then he rolled it on his waist ready to go to the room but when he was walking by me he grabbed from behind and sucked on my neck making me slightly jump. “Stop that.” I warned him but not abruptly or shaking him away from me. “I want to have sex with you Ade.” He growled in my ear. “I can’t take it anymore.” He complained. “Ade…” Marcella shouted. I smiled at him and freed myself from his arms. I was saved by the bell. “I’m coming princess.” I shouted at her. James followed me with a disappointed look in his eyes that broke my heart but I couldn’t do it and I didn’t want to have that conversation with him. “Can you help with tying my hair?” She asked me stretching me her brush. I sat on her bed and helped her with her hair. She had this amazing blond long hair. When I was done I pulled her to me and inhaled on her cheek and kissed her. “You look beautiful.” I said getting up. “Now I need to finish myself too.” I said. When I walked in the room James was folding up the sleeves of his white shirt. His linen black pants adjusting perfectly on his legs. I felt the scent of his perfume and his hair was carefully worked with gel. He looked amazing. “Wow…babe.” I blurted looking at him. “Surprise.” He said spinning around making me laugh but he looked too good. I walked up to him and kissed his lips. “You look good too.” He said. “Now hurry up, it’s getting late.” I fixed my hair and put a little makeup. I finished with a few drops of my favorite Moschino perfume. I put my sandals and looked at James who was watching me with his hands shoved in his pockets. He smiled. “Beautiful. Gorgeous as usual.” He said giving me his arm. “Cella…” I called, she appeared running on the living room and the three of us left. The van that picked us up at the airport was waiting for us outside the hotel. I saw some flashes when we stepped outside but we just ignored it. “Café at Sotheby’s.” James instructed the driver and we left. The restaurant was fancy, expensive and fashionable. All decorated in black and white, it was quiet inside and looked comfortable. We were sat at a corner as James asked in a round table for three. “This is cool dad.” Marcella said looking around. James looked at me waiting for my approval. He caught my hand that was resting on the tale with his. “Did I exaggerate?” He asked me. I shook my head. “No, it’s fancy but simple. I like it.” Marcella ordered steak with French fries. James chose grilled salmon with lemon juice and pepper and vegetables. I went with chicken in the oven with gratin potatoes. We talked cheerfully during our meal and Marcella kept on amusing us with her jokes. She was the cutest thing and I felt James was happy to have her with us. James held my hand whenever he could and I, of course, let him do it and even shared the caresses with him. We were happy and relaxing. Marcella was having dessert when an unexpected event happened. A brunette, well dressed, good looking approached our table. I looked up at her surprised, maybe a fan and James also looked at her clueless. “Hello James.” She said smiling. I knew instantly who she was. I let go of his hand and I turned ice in a second. James looked at me a bit in panic and Marcella looked at us innocently. James remained in silence. “You don’t remember me?” She continued. Obviously she was doing on purpose and provoking. “I am sorry but I don’t.” He said coldly. I could not believe my eyes. She was pretty, around my age. “If you excuse me I am here having dinner with my family.” He said coldly. “Too bad…” She said smiling and winking at me. She turned around balancing her hips back to her table. “Cella are you finished?” James asked his daughter, seeing her nodding he waved the waitress and asked for the bill. “Who is that girl daddy?” She asked him. “I don’t know who she is.” He said exchanging a quick look with me. As the bill was paid he grabbed my hand and we left. “Wanna walk a bit?” He asked me. I nodded not saying a word. We walked down Bond Street with Marcella a bit ahead of us. “Are you ok?” He asked me. Of course I was not ok. Seeing the woman he had cheated on me with was just crushing. I had expected her to look awful, old, I don’t know but she was just the opposite of all that. “I’m sorry…” He said again as I all gave him was silence. “She is pretty.” I said. “I didn’t know. I told you how everything happened. It still doesn’t matter.” He said. “God…seeing her was just so…” I said with tears in my eyes and my voice trembled. James stopped walking and grabbed my hand. “No…no…no…don’t cry. Come on love.” He said. Marcella came back to join us. “Are you crying Ade?” She asked serious. I forced a smile. “No princess. I am not. It’s a wonderful night isn’t it?” I asked her beginning to walk again. James grabbed my hand and we walked down the street in silence. When Marcella was tired James called the driver to pick us up and he took us back to the hotel. The little girl fell asleep on the van and James had to carry her in his arms to her room. I helped him changing her to her pajama and tucking her in bed. Then it was our turn to go to bed. I undressed m self in silence and took my makeup off while James was already sat in bed looking at the TV. I slid into a white silk nightgown and went to bed. He turned the TV off and then his night lamp. It all went dark and I turned with my back on him but I felt his body against mine and he pulled me to him. “Wanna talk about it.” He said kissing my shoulder. “No.” I said. “Are you sure?” “What do you want me to tell you? That it is bad enough to know you were with another woman imagine having her right in front of my eyes while you are having dinner. No, I don’t want to talk about it. I just want to disappear.” I said letting my rage come out. James turned around in bed and switched the lamp on again. With a hand in my shoulder he made me turn around on my back to look at him. “It wasn’t my fault.” He claimed. “It wasn’t your fault what?” I defied him. “I didn’t know she was going to be there. Hell I didn’t even know how she looked like Ade! Come on…we are trying to let this go.” “It’s a bit impossible when I had her in front of my eyes.” I shot. James puffed and rubbed his face with his hands. “It was your fault, you couldn’t keep your dick in your pants.” I finished. He gave me an accusative look and then he just switched the lamp off again. I felt him laying down on the bed with his back turned at me. “Now you turn your back on me?” I provoked. “We better get some sleep.” He said. His voice sounded pissed. “Yeah…if this was the other way around I would like to see how you would react.” “How many times do I have to say that I am sorry?” He raised his voice. “Well, clearly sorry isn’t enough.” I hissed. I was beyond furious and almost hitting the irrational. “ I said I was sorry a thousand times and I asked for forgiveness, there’s not much more I can do.” “Of course not.” I said. James punched the bed and shouted. “What the fuck do you want me to do? Tell me…” “Like you said we better get some sleep.” James laid back on the bed frustrated. “Fuck…” He muttered in frustration. I decide to end the night at that boiling point and remained in silence hoping I could sleep. |
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| xlau05 | February 1, 2011, 1:29 pm Post #275 |
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Blackened
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nooo! everything was getting better between them but I understand Ade.. it's not easy.I hope they'll talk tomorrow! they need to start all over again and find a way to move on.. amazing update, thank you
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| 4everJamie | February 1, 2011, 2:26 pm Post #276 |
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Some Kind Of Monster
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While I was reading this: His skin shinning wet, drops of water down his body, his hair slicked back wet and tiny drops of water falling from his lips " I caught myselft like that in front of the computer ![]() What can I say? I had a bad day and that kept me distracted.What really sucks is that .... this girl appeared they just started to relax and getting a little closer... Thanks for the update! Can´t wait to read what´s next |
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| Izzy | February 1, 2011, 3:06 pm Post #277 |
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Outlaw Torn
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Damn! They just got back together and even got closer... but then that girl shows up!! ![]() They really need to talk! More! |
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| Karla Hetfield | February 1, 2011, 6:51 pm Post #278 |
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Poor Twisted Me
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Lots of things happened here! I hope this week in London help them get toghther again... |
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| LittleVirus | February 1, 2011, 8:53 pm Post #279 |
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Poor Twisted Me
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Nooo, they were just about to get close again! That fucking stupid slut! Why did she have to bother them?? GRRR... LOCK AND LOAD!! But I understand Ade... I'd react the exact same way as she did, except I'd might have called that bitch a "cheap groupie" before she went back to her own table... More please! I hope things get better for them!
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| Scorpion Flower | February 2, 2011, 12:19 pm Post #280 |
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Outlaw Torn
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Thank you all so much for the comments. ********************* Next morning the environment between us wasn’t greater or much different. James got out of the bed first. The look on his face showed how pissed he still was. I didn’t think he had the right to be though. I was the one being cheated, I was the one who had all the right to be pissed. He showered, shaved, got dressed without even saying good morning. I did the exact same thing. We walked around the room without even looking at each other. “I’m gonna order breakfast.” He said slamming the door strongly behind him and it was the first time I had heard his voice during the morning. I shivered hearing the door slamming. In the living room he was playing with Marcella and I was the one receiving the trays with our breakfast. I didn’t mind, this way I didn’t have to go too close. Seeing I had all the food on the table he sat bringing Marcella with him. I served her while James began to serve himself. “Is this ok?” I asked her. She smiled at me with the cutest smile ever. “Can you put a bit of jelly on my bread please?” She asked. “Of course sweetheart.” I agreed. James ended up serving me too, when it was my turn to sit in front of my plate, my eggs were already there. As I stick my fork on the eggs James talked. “Did you take the pills?” He asked me and I shook my head. I got up and brought the bottle off my bag. “You keep forgetting your medication. Do I always have to remind you?” He said serious and far from being a friendly tone. “What is that for Ade?” Marcella asked. And I was glad she spoke because James was getting on my nerves with his rude attitude. “For the stomach so the baby won’t make me sick.” I smiled. “Ah…ok.” She said biting her bread. I looked back at James and threw him a pissed look but he didn’t even care or changed his own look. When he was finished he just got up and went to our room coming back a couple of minutes later with his shades and his wallet. “I have an interview…” He began clearing his throat. “I’ll come back for lunch. The bodyguards are staying just in case you want to go out for while.” He said. Marcella looked at him and smiled I just kept eating. “Ade…did you listen?” He asked me. “Yep.” Was my simple answer. He put the shades on his face and slammed the door closed. Marcella made a funny face. “Daddy is mad.” She said looking at me, even she knew him that well. “He’s fine.” I said pinching her cheek lightly. “Wanna go feed the squirrels at Hyde Park?” “That would be great.” She said. Hyde Park was quite near and we could walk and it was big enough to keep entertained until lunch time. I hated to go out on the street with two guys following me all the time but I guessed it came with the territory, plus I was holding Marcella in my hand. She talked nonstop along our way, she amused me a lot. “You’re not talking to dad…” She said. Marcella was very attentive to details. “We talk sweetie, don’t worry. He was just cranky.” I explained. “But you’re mad at him. I saw you look.” I laughed. “I promise everything is fine.” I reassured her. “Don’t be mad at dad Ade.” She begged me. I crouched in front of her and held her really close. “I am not.” I told her placing a kiss on her forehead then I gave her a bag of peanuts so she could feed the squirrels. “Now go feed them. Look they’re already around us.” I said turning her around. Marcella crouched and began to feed the animals giggling every time one of them caught the food off her hand. Soon there were a dozen around us waiting for their turn. She went crazy and laughed all the time. I had to buy her another bag of peanuts and I had a hard time dragging her from there but I convinced her with feeding the ducks at the lake. After a little walk I decided it was time to go back to the hotel, it was about lunch time. I couldn’t say I was looking forward to it because of James’s humor but it was my duty. Much to my surprise, he was already in the room. We found him sat on the couch reading a magazine. Marcella ran, instantly, to his arms telling him about the walk in the park. James laughed together with her and kissed her cheek then he turned to me. “Did you take the bodyguards with you?” His tone was not as rude as in the morning but it still had a bit of arrogance in it. “Yes I did.” I said turning my back on him and walking into the room. I wanted to change to my clothes as I had soiled my jeans at the park. James burst into the room right after me. “Why the fucking attitude?” He asked me hushing so Marcella wouldn’t hear us. “I’m not the one with a fucking attitude. You’re the one bossing people around, talking shit and slamming doors in the morning so I am not the one with the fucking attitude.” I hissed. “Boss you around?” He asked resting his hands on his waist. “Did you take the bodyguards with you?” I said imitating his tone. “That is not bossing you around. It’s for your own safety and my daughter’s.” “I know but you don’t have to check everything. Did you take your pills Ade? Did you take the bodyguards with you?” He laughed. “Because you’re irresponsible.” He shot. That hurt me deeply. “Fuck you.” I shot back. “And now it’s a fucking attitude.” I turned my back on him to go to the toilet but he grabbed my arm. His eyes shooting bullets at me. “Unless you want me to puke on your feet you better let go of me.” He opened his hand and I prayed to the gods of porcelain again. Maybe it was the nerves, I don’t know. He didn’t held my hair this time just stood at the threshold watching me. When I was passing by him I felt his hand on my shoulder but I shook it away. “Get off me.” I muttered. Then I just grabbed my purse and waited for him to have lunch. “Cella…” I called. She appeared in a pink dress and white sandals which made me laugh. She was just a girl indeed. “Where are we going? Can we go to Macdonald’s?” She asked on our way to the elevators. “Ade can’t go to Mac Cella.” James said. “Of course I can.” I said just to irritate him and he narrowed his eyes at me. We didn’t want to fight in front of Marcella so he stood quiet. We ended up at the Macdonald’s over the corner of the Hotel’s street. I hated Macdonald’s, to tell the truth but somehow I felt like having a Big Mac. “How come you’re eating this?” James asked me even showing a soft smile on his lips. I smiled back and shrugged. “Don’t know.” I said biting on my burger. After our meal the van took us to the venue. Metallica was playing that night and the night after. I left James and Marcella in the room with the rest of the band and went to see the stage and visit the rest of the crew. I had made friends between them while I toured with Metallica as their sound engineer. “Hey guys.” I said when I got there. I was greeted cheerfully by a bunch. Kirk’s guitar tech came to me. “The sound is shit.” He said summing things up. “Still?” I asked an he nodded. “We think this PA here is unplugged but the joint is up there.” “Oh, go to the sound table and I’ll check the joint.” I offered. He did as I suggested and I looked at the PA studying the best way to climb on it. I put a foot on Kirk’s amp and then a knee on the PA, I pulled myself up and I got there. I began to check the wires while he tested the sound. “Check it now.” I said. “What the fuck are you doing?” James shouted making me jump and unbalance. “Get off there now!” He shouted. He looked pissed off again. I began to come down but before I put my feet on the ground he grabbed me on his arms. “What do you think you’re doing?” “I was trying to help ok! It’s your band so next time I’ll stay still.” I said offended. “I appreciate your help but you can’t climb up there!” He shouted pointing. “You’re pregnant Ade, what if you fall?” I chocked. I didn’t remember that little BIG detail. “I’m sorry…” I whispered. “You’re sorry!!” He continued. “And then you get all offended because I say you’re irresponsible.” “Hey…ENOUGH!!” I shouted back and turning away. James followed me and grabbed my arm guiding me inside a room. “Can’t you even remember you have a baby inside of you?” “Shut the fuck up! This is not about that. You’ve been cranky all day. This is about last night.” I said. Now I had the chance to say it all as Marcella was nowhere near us. James became silent with my words. “I am not irresponsible and you know that.” “Well you were up there.” “And I said I was sorry.” I said. “I miss you Ade.” He whispered with a bit of frustration on his voice. Everything began to make sense. “Well I am here. I came with you.” I diverted because I knew perfectly well that as not what he meant. “Why are you pretending you don’t know what I mean?” He asked me leaning against a black box crossing his arms around his chest. I ran a hand through my hair. “Because I don’t want to talk about that.” I said. “I miss having sex with you. I miss touching you.” He said ignoring my last remark. “I am craving to be with you.” “I am not ready for that.” “And when will you be ready?” He asked raising his voice again. “How long do I have to wait? I brought you with me to work things out and you agreed coming with me then why aren’t we working things out? You avoid me.” “I am sorry but I wasn’t the one having sex with another person.” He put his gaze on the floor immediately. “And to make things worse I bump into her last night. I had to cope with a bitch balancing her hips right in front of my eyes. I had to cope with a bitch greeting my boyfriend and clearly provoking me. So I am really sorry if I am not ready to have sex with you.” He went silent. “So you ran out of words?” I asked him. Jams kept looking at his feet. “Yeah…I thought so.” I said swallowing the lump in my throat. I hated the fact that I had seen the girl. Associating a face to your boyfriend’s sex adventure was harsh and not advised to anyone. Seeing that woman definitely made me step back at an incredible speed. I was about to leave but he grabbed me by my waist and pulled me against him. “This is not what I had planned for us.” He whispered. “Believe me, not what I had planned either.” I turned around to look at him. “It’s just hard, you have to understand that.” I swallowed my next words as my eyes filled with tears. “I thought she was a nasty groupie, you know and then I find out she’s young and pretty and well dressed and she smelled good.” I said letting my tears fall down my face. James grabbed my face between his hands. “You are the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen. To me you are and no one can be compared to you. And I know the situation was awkward but…” “I know…” I said calming both our frustration down. “I also miss you that way, don’t think I don’t but I can’t let go, I just can’t.” “Tonight Ade…” He said as a suggestion but made me laugh. “What about improvising?” I joked. He giggled a bit. “Tonight.” He said again. “Please…” He rested his forehead against mine. “Please…I am begging you. I need to be with you.” “What if it’s not the same thing?” I asked him. He looked me in the eye. “Is that what you’re afraid of? That you don’t like it anymore?” “What if you call out her name?” “Ade…” He said putting both his hands on my shoulders and looking serious into my eyes. His blue gaze asking attention. “I didn’t remember her face do you think I know her name? I don’t know her name. Again, it didn’t mean anything.” “Not even now that you’ve seen her?” I was incredibly insecure. “NO!” He said loud. “For Christ’s sake bear in your mind that nothing like this is going to happen again and that I love you and only you and I want to be just with you.” A knock on the door calling us brought an end to our conversation. “Tonight…” He mouthed me while joining the others to go on stage do what he loved. I smiled. I picked up Marcella and took her with me to the side of the stage so we could watch the show from there. Full house cheering Metallica enthusiastically. They kicked off with Blackned and it was a fast concert the whole time. James was another man holding his guitar I couldn’t but make a difference between the two of them. Marcella and I followed the crowd’s gesture, whenever they sung we did too, whenever they clapped we did too and on Enter Sandamn when James asked the crowd to clap we followed, it was beautiful all those hands in the air. He gave a quick look at us and saw us following and a grin formed on his face but I knew he was just proud we were enjoying his show. The show ended and we made our way back to the hotel. “Great night.” I said when we were in the van. “They were crazy and loud moth…people.” He corrected feeling Marcella’s eyes on him. “Are you tired?” I asked him but he just shook his head looking in my eye lustfully. I smiled back knowingly. I didn’t know if I could do it but I would give it a try. I couldn’t have him after me begging me to have sex with him. He was right if we were trying we had to be a couple again. Marcella ended up falling asleep in the van and we did the same procedure as the previous night. It was too much of a fuss for her tender 8 years old but she tried hard to follow the rhythm. It was 3 am already. James grabbed me first thing as we closed the door of my room. “Hey, let me pee first and take my makeup off and those kind of things.” I told him. “Ok..” He said giving me a peck. I saw him taking his clothes off before I closed the door of the bathroom when I came back he was sleeping on the bed. I smiled. “James…” I whispered in his ear, he struggled to open his eyes. “I am sorry.” He mumbled in his sleepy voice. “It’s ok babe. You better lay under the covers tough.” He did it and pulled me to him. “I am tired.” He complained. “I thought you would be. Sleep well.” I said kissing his neck but I got non response. |
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| 4everJamie | February 2, 2011, 3:10 pm Post #281 |
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Some Kind Of Monster
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Thanks for the update! “I miss having sex with you. I miss touching you.” He said ignoring my last remark. “I am craving to be with you.” “And when will you be ready?” He asked raising his voice again. “How long do I have to wait? I brought you with me to work things out and you agreed coming with me then why aren’t we working things out? You avoid me.” I guess patience is not James´ strength I hope that they find a way to get back to what they once had. btw James falling asleep had been so cute
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| xlau05 | February 2, 2011, 3:22 pm Post #282 |
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Blackened
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I just love how you write, how you describe the situations, the feelings and.. everything! Maybe it's true.. maybe they really need a night together(hihi ) to feel like before and make it okay..Update pllllllease
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| Scorpion Flower | February 2, 2011, 4:44 pm Post #283 |
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Outlaw Torn
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Awwww...Thank you, Thank you, thank you.... I'll update again tomorrow:) |
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| Karla Hetfield | February 2, 2011, 6:47 pm Post #284 |
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Poor Twisted Me
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What a nice update! It was so cute at the end! I was glad when he finally stop talking like that with her, even though I know that he's just being protective. Thanks for the chapter!
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| ElisabethOrion | February 2, 2011, 7:39 pm Post #285 |
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I'm creatively constipated.
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I have been reading I swear! Just no time to comment when I finish the chapters I catch up on. But all's good! Love it! Ps.... James is a
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I.......I..... I´m speechless

but I understand Ade.. it's not easy.

What can I say? I had a bad day and that kept me distracted.
) to feel like before and make it okay..
Just no time to comment when I finish the chapters I catch up on. 
8:38 PM Jul 10