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| Too Late, Too Late; James+Deborah(OFC), 2001- | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: March 22, 2011, 1:11 pm (15,640 Views) | |
| Broken, Beat & Scarred | March 22, 2011, 1:11 pm Post #1 |
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Hey girls! I used to post my fics here, but stopped due to certain reasons. I've recently read my own stories all over again, and thought that I could share some of them with you, assuming you're interested in reading them. ![]() I'll start with my oldest, longest and dearest, Too Late, Too Late. If you like it and want me to keep posting, let me know! ![]() Disclaimer: I do not know Metallica or their families and I am not in any way affiliated with them. I intend no harm to the people who appear in this story. I do not get any profit from posting and writing this fan fiction story, which, for the record, is purely fiction. I do own my own original characters in this story. ~*~*~*~*~*~*~ PART 1: I was sitting on a comfortable chair in our backyard. My husband was playing catch with our four-year-old son and I was just enjoying a free moment, waiting for the baby to wake up. We had been living in this house for a few years now. It had two floors and I was in love with the house. It was everything I had ever wanted; it was, simply put, perfect. My life was pretty much perfect, too; I was in love with my husband, he was in love with me. We had been together for 7 years, married for four. We had known each other over ten years, so, I felt safe to say that we knew each other as well as we just could have. I had been pregnant when we got married, but that wasn’t why we had gotten married. We had been discussing marriage ever since the first year of our relationship, but he didn’t propose to me until later. The newest addition to our family, the little bundle of joy, was sleeping at the moment and I was waiting for her to wake up. I had to feed her and then get her back to sleep again. I soon heard noises from the baby monitor on the nearby desk. I grabbed the baby monitor and rushed upstairs. “Morning, my sweet little baby. Did you sleep well, sweetie? Wanna go out and say hi to daddy and Michael? Let’s go out for a while, shall we?” I talked to the baby as I lifted her up from the crib. Before going out, I quickly changed her diaper and then walked slowly downstairs and grabbed a small pillow from the couch in the living room. I walked outside and sat down on a chair that was not in direct sunlight, but that was placed so that it was warm and not windy. I carefully placed the pillow under the baby’s head. I lifted my shirt and started breast-feeding the little girl. She was probably the most beautiful baby I had ever seen and I was so happy to have her. “Okay, Mike, go get your stuff, we gotta go soon,” my husband said to our son. He was going to work and he was taking Michael with him, so, I could take care of the baby and not have to worry about two kids, especially when one of them was as active as Mike and one needed me every second, as the baby did. Michael ran inside and my husband walked to me, smiling. He caressed the baby’s head softly and looked at me, still smiling. “I gotta go to work, sweetie, I wish I didn’t have to, though...,” he said quietly. He had been with me, with us, pretty much all the time during the past 10 weeks. I knew that he missed going to work, but I also knew him well enough to know that if he had gone to work every day, and been away for 6 to 8 hours, he would have felt guilty for missing out spending time with the kids. “I’m sure the guys would understand if...,” I started, but stopped, as I figured it would be selfish of me to keep him from what he loved the most – the music. If he was the one to make the decision – fine, but I didn’t want to ask him to stay at home with me. “Yeah, the guys would, and they do, too, but I just couldn’t get out of this meeting, I’m so sorry, honey,” he replied and softly stroked my hair. “The recording company is giving us trouble, I gotta be there.” I nodded. “Don’t be sorry, I totally understand, she’ll go to sleep soon and I’ll try to do some work then... And you know, if you need help with the-” “Come on, you don’t have to work. You just had a baby...,” he cut of me off firmly. “I know I don’t have to, but I have some stuff to do. I got a call yesterday and they said that-” I started. “Look, I know you would like to work, but you’re on a maternity leave. You remember what that means, right?” he asked, cutting me off, again. I smiled and nodded. “Yeah, so, no work. Plus, as one of your bosses, I’m officially, or unofficially, I guess, banning you from working. That is, until the baby’s bigger and all that. They’ll, or we’ll, survive without for some time.” “I know, but... I just like working.” He smiled at me and his eyes twinkled. God, I loved that man! “Sweetie, I know, but you’ve just had a baby, you need to rest. And you know you should be sleeping when she’s sleeping, too.” “I’ve been doing that. You know that. And it’s been two months. It’s not ‘just’ anymore.” “I know, but nonetheless. I’m not discussing this. And I should get going. I’ll be back as soon as I can,” he said, kissing me softly. “Daddy, come on!” Michael yelled loudly from the back door. The baby startled at the loud voice and started to cry. “It’s okay, don’t cry, sweetie, mommy’s here, don’t worry...,” I said in a calm voice, stroking her few hair. “I’ll remind Mike that he can’t scream anymore,” he said laughing quietly. God, I loved his laugh and his smile. I looked at him and smiled. I saw a pair of blue eyes watching my dark brown ones. “What?” he asked. “Nothing, I was just thinking how much I love you, that’s all.” “I love you, too, honey, but I really gotta go. I’m already late. I’ll be back by lunch, I promise,” he said. “Maybe some alone time later tonight? When Mike’s sleeping and the baby, too?” he asked grinning. “That would be great, honey. It’s been a while...,” I said and grinned back at him. He gently kissed my lips, again, and rushed away. I heard the car doors slamming and the car speeding away. ~*~*~*~*~ I heard a door slamming and I realized that I had fallen asleep. “Deb! You home?” a drunken voice shouted from the living room. It was my boyfriend. He had come home from his normal bar tour; and I assumed he would continue drinking straight away. I was at his apartment, as usual. We didn’t officially live together, but even though we had two apartments in San Francisco we mainly spent our time in his apartment. “Yeah, I was sleeping, I’m in the bedroom,” I replied with a sigh. I had been dreaming the most wonderful dream... and now, I didn’t even want to think about my life. It sucked. An alcoholic as a boyfriend, and we were in a relationship that had no future, but still… I was in love with him. I heard his footsteps coming my way and soon he leaned over me and I could smell the whiskey in his breath and taste it in his kiss. My life was sooo different from what I wanted it to be. “I’m gonna watch a movie, wanna join?” he asked. “Sure, I’ll be right there,” I answered. I wasn’t feeling very tired and I wanted to do something with him. We didn’t do that much together, not anymore at least. We used to talk a lot and go out (movies, dinners, walks, ...) ; we did many things. But now... He usually drank alcohol and I just watched. I sometimes drank with him, but I didn’t enjoy it at all. I was really worried about him, but he didn’t understand what he was doing to himself, or at least I don’t think he realized that he was only hurting himself. “You comin’?” he yelled. I got up and walked to the living room. There were two six-packs of beer. I sat beside him on the couch. He handed me an ice-cold beer and took one for himself, too. He then pushed the play-button and the movie started. I couldn’t concentrate on the movie, so I kept thinking my life and the dream I had had. A few months ago, I had mentioned that his drinking had gotten out of hand and that maybe he should try to stop. It was no use; he had just gotten mad at me. I had then stopped talking to him about alcohol and, for a while, we got on better. I realized that I couldn’t live like this anymore. I had to talk to him and try to get him to realize what he was doing to himself. Edited by Broken, Beat & Scarred, December 29, 2011, 9:57 am.
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| Scorpion Flower | March 22, 2011, 1:14 pm Post #2 |
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Outlaw Torn
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I remember this:) |
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| Broken, Beat & Scarred | March 22, 2011, 1:19 pm Post #3 |
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Nice! I hope you liked it! One of these days, I'll finish reading your new stories, btw!
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| larscriancinha | March 22, 2011, 1:20 pm Post #4 |
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Larsybaby
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This sounds great so far. I hope you continue, I'd love to read more.
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| Scorpion Flower | March 22, 2011, 1:22 pm Post #5 |
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Outlaw Torn
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You have a lot to read then... I have finished 3 and I started a new one last week.
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| Izzy | March 22, 2011, 1:33 pm Post #6 |
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Outlaw Torn
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Very interesting, so far. Can't wait for more!!
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| Broken, Beat & Scarred | March 22, 2011, 1:35 pm Post #7 |
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I read quickly. Haha. And I've been following most of the fics, since I try to keep myself up to date with what kinds of stories people are posting here, so, I read and read and don't have enough time to comment. :< And thanks Izzy and Miss St. Anger (I'm afraid I don't know your name) for your comments, too!
Edited by Broken, Beat & Scarred, March 22, 2011, 1:36 pm.
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| Lilith | March 22, 2011, 2:55 pm Post #8 |
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♥ Jaimelicious ♥
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He he he! I just wonder whom she was dreaming about? Sweet sweet dream indeed! ![]()
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| Broken, Beat & Scarred | March 22, 2011, 5:35 pm Post #9 |
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Thanks for your comment, Lilith! ![]() If it wasn't/isn't clear who she was dreaming about... Maybe this'll help. Enjoy! ~*~*~*~*~*~*~ PART 2: We were still watching the movie when the phone rang. I got up quickly to answer it. I was so glad someone called; the movie was really boring, at least in my opinion. I knew it was one of James’ favorites, though. Besides, during these couple of years we had been dating, I had seen the movie like a dozen times. I got up from the couch and walked to the kitchen to answer the phone. He didn’t even notice I left the room. “Hello,” I said when I picked up the phone. “Hi, sweets, what’s up?” a voice asked. It took me a little while to recognize it. “Oh my god! Christina! How have you been? How’d you know I’d be here? Where are you? Are you comin’ home soon?” I asked rapidly. “Whoa! Easy with the questions! I’ve been great. And I actually called your apartment first, but you didn’t answer there. Well, obviously, since you’re at James’s place. So, yeah, I thought you might be with James, aaand you are...” She was silent for a moment. “And I’m in New York at the moment; I’ll be back in San Francisco sometime this week. I’m not sure about the date yet... I need to check some flights and I thought I’d visit a friend.” “That’s so great. I’ve missed you so much!” I exclaimed. I had known Christina for about 30 years. We had been best friends almost… Well, forever. We grew up together and we had been through so much. We had been living together for four years, although she had been in Europe for the past year. It had been nice to have the place for myself, but now, or eight months ago, when things between James and me had gotten really serious, I had been spending most of my time at his place; however, lately James and I hadn’t been doing so well, so, I had been home a lot more and I felt myself lonely. But anyway, I was so glad that Christina was finally coming back. “Yeah, I’ve missed you, too. But hey, how’s life there?” she asked. “Well... You know. Could be better...,” I said quietly. I glanced at James sitting in the living room, and sighed. He was completely engrossed in the movie. “What’s wrong?” “Well, nothing really... And I don’t want to talk about it... At least, not over the phone.” “Aww, I’m so sorry, hon, I’m sure you’ll work it out...” “I’m not,” I said with a laugh. “Is it really a laughing matter?” Christina asked. “Well, no, but I don’t want to think about it now...,” I said. “I really can’t wait to see you,” I continued, changing the subject. “Yeah, I’ll try to get there as soon as possible. And I’ll call you when I’m coming, okay?” “Sure. I could come and pick you up from the airport, too, I mean, since your car isn’t there...,” I replied. “Yeah, that would be great. Listen, I can’t really talk right now. But I promise that I’ll call you soon.” “That’s a deal then.” “Yeah, talk to you soon, honey, I love you.” “Love you, too, bye.” I stayed in the kitchen a bit longer than I needed to. I thought about my dream, my relationship with James and Christina’s return. All three of those things made me anxious, though I was really happy that Christina was coming back after a year. But the dream and James... Hello, anxiety. ~*~*~*~*~ “Who was that?” James asked when I got back to the living room. So, he had noticed. “Christina.” “Which one’s she again?” James asked. I frowned, he must have been drinking a lot if he didn’t remember my best friend and roommate. “The best one, the roommate. The one who’s in Europe. Or was actually.” “Ohh, I see. She’s back, huh?” he glanced at me, but quickly turned his gaze back to the TV screen. “Yeah, she’s in New York now and she’ll be home this week.” “Are you gonna live with her then?” James asked. I hadn’t even thought of that. “I don’t know, actually. Most likely... I mean, it is her apartment, too, and she doesn’t have any other place to go, so, why not?” “Yeah. Wanna finish the movie?” he asked me. That meant our discussion about Christina was over. “I don’t think so. I’m not in the mood...” “Oh, okay. You want another beer then?” “No, thanks... I think I’m just gonna go to bed.” “Want some company?” he asked, grinning. I knew that grin way too well. For a moment, I thought I’d say no, but I changed my mind. “Sure. Just gimme a couple of minutes.” ~*~*~*~*~ For the first time in... I don’t know... a long time, I felt somewhat happy. The past couple of months had been quite stressing. I had had some work stuff that I wasn’t able to let go of and it had affected our relationship. James had started to drink more as I wasn’t with him. Now that I was quite free from work, he had continued drinking. Things between us had been quite tense, before tonight we hadn’t even kissed for weeks. I was now resting beside James, thinking if I should talk to him about his drinking. Just as I was opening my mouth, I heard something that changed my mind. He had fallen asleep and was now snoring. I sighed and turned to look at his face. “I love you, James, I really do. I’m just worried about you.” Of course, I didn’t get a reply, but I said it anyway. I figured saying the words to him, even when he was asleep, might help me get the courage to say the same thing to him when he was awake again. |
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| Christine | March 22, 2011, 7:24 pm Post #10 |
Frantic
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That dream sounds so perfect!! I like the beginning a lot, interesting! Nice job! |
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| larscriancinha | March 23, 2011, 1:15 am Post #11 |
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Larsybaby
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Aw, I hope she finds the courage to talk to him. And I agree, the dream does sound perfect! Can't wait for more. |
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| Broken, Beat & Scarred | March 23, 2011, 4:36 pm Post #12 |
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Thanks for your comments, you two! ![]() Here's part three! ~*~*~*~*~*~*~ PART 3: “James, Lars wants you, he’s on the phone,” I said as I tried to wake him up. “Fuck off!” he grunted. “Yeah, he’s... umm... he’s busy,” I told Lars. “Fuck. Has he been drinking again?” he asked. “Uh-huh...” I walked out of the bedroom to the kitchen. “Have you talked to him about it?” “Yeah, he got pissed. And that was already months ago..., but I’m guessing he wouldn’t be happy with it now either...” “For helvede,” Lars cursed in Danish. “Well, I gotta go now. Tell that fucker that he has to call me when he gets up. It’s really fucking important, okay?” “Yeah, I’ll tell him. Say hi to the guys for me,” I said and hung up. Lars called again a few hours later, asking if James was up yet. “I don’t know, I’ll go and check.” I walked to the bedroom, opened the bedroom door and asked, “James? You up yet?” “No! Leave me the fuck alone, will you?” “Lars, he’s still sleeping. Sorry,” I told Lars, trying to forget James' reply. “Okay, well I guess we just have to fucking wait then.” “What’s up? What’s the rush?” “Just some recording stuff, I don’t wanna bother you with it...,” Lars said. I heard instantly, though, that there was something wrong. I had known Lars for many years now and he didn’t sound like that too often. “Okay. I’m gonna go home now, so, I won’t be here answering the phone. He might sleep for a few hours more. I’m gonna come over to the studio tomorrow, you remember?” “Yeah, the weekly meeting. I’ll see you then. I’m gonna keep calling James,” Lars said and hung up. I went to get my stuff. I took my purse and jacket and put on my shoes. I went back to the kitchen and wrote a note for James. “Lars has some band stuff, he needs to talk to you. Sounded serious, call him!!” I underlined the words ‘needs’ and ‘call’. I usually wrote him something nice, such as ‘I love you’, but I was now slightly offended, since he hadn’t been so nice to me. Of course, I understood that it was because he probably had a hangover and he wasn’t really a morning-person, but still... I left the note on the kitchen table and left. ~*~*~*~*~ James: I called Deborah in the evening, I thought that I could go to some bar with Lars and thought that I could ask her to come, too. “Hi,” she said softly. “Hey... Wanna go to some bar with me and Lars?” “No, thanks. And... Maybe you shouldn’t go either,” she said quietly. “What do you mean?” I asked, hoping that she was okay. “I mean...” She took a breath before she continued. “I mean that you have a problem. You should seriously cut back on your drinking. I’m really worried about you and I -” “I’m an adult, I can take care of myself,” I interrupted, “I know what I’m doing,” I continued. At the same time, I took a bottle of whiskey from under the sink and set it on the table. “Yes, I’m sure you do, but alcoholics don’t like to admit that they need help.” ”I’m not a fucking alcoholic. I don’t have to drink, I just want to.” “James, you drink alcohol daily, doesn’t that tell you something?” “Yeah, I like the taste of alcohol. I’m not addicted.” “Fine. Do you remember that time when we were visiting my Mom and you had sneaked a bottle of vodka with you?” “Yeah, I do..., but it wasn’t like that. I’m not an alcoholic; I really am not. I was just nervous then... I mean I met your parents and...” “No, you didn’t! You only met my Mom. You have never met my dad. God! How can you not remember that?” she exclaimed, clearly frustrated. “I do, I got confused, sorry. I meant just your mom...,” I said, mentally smacking myself for making that mistake. “Whatever. Go to the bar if you want to, but do not show up here when you’re drunk, okay?” “You know what? I’m not gonna go. I’ll stay home tonight. I’ll prove you that I’m not a drunk.” “Fine. Do what you want,” she said. I heard in her tone that she didn’t believe me. “No, I’m serious. I don’t have to drink. I just like it, okay? I’ll just stay home tonight and... Well... I could do some lyrics or something. Or do you wanna hang out?” I asked. “No, I think I’m gonna stay home tonight. I’ll put Christina’s room ready and all...” “Right. Have you talked to her?” “Not today, no.” We both were quiet for a while. “Do you think we should talk or something...?” I asked. “Now... I’m confused, what are we doing now?” she asked sarcastically. “I’m serious. You have been odd lately...,” I said and sighed, “I... last night I woke up and you were crying. In your sleep. I... uhh... I didn’t want to wake you.” I ran my free hand through my hair. “I dunno, man... I guess I should’ve though... I don’t know why I didn’t...” “I’m just having some stuff to think,” she said. I thought I heard something in her voice that wasn’t normal, some kind of sadness, or something. “Ohh, which reminds me. I have some legal stuff about which I need to talk to you guys tomorrow.” “Are you drinking... Uhh... I mean... thinking about your work stuff so much that you can’t sleep well?” “No, work’s cool. Besides, at the moment I’m just dealing with your stuff, nothing that big. But I just have some... personal stuff to think.” “I see. So, today’s a don’t-share-any-personal-stuff-with-your-boyfriend –day?” “I... It’s... It has nothing to do with you, so, there’s no need to have you thinking about it as well...” “Fine. Drop by tomorrow, we’re gonna be at the Presidio,” I said and hung up. I put the phone down and took a sip of the whiskey. Maybe she was right... Maybe I should cut back on my drinking. But I wasn’t an alcoholic that was for sure. I knew how they were and I wasn’t like them. I could work and I was doing just fine. My life was in order. Only things between Deborah and me weren’t that good. I took another sip of the whiskey and just sat still. |
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| Lawrah Luvsmetallica | March 23, 2011, 4:48 pm Post #13 |
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Poor Twisted Me
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Wat James era is this ? And I like this alot MORE! |
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| Christine | March 23, 2011, 5:17 pm Post #14 |
Frantic
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This is getting interesting! oh, James and his booze...
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| Izzy | March 23, 2011, 5:45 pm Post #15 |
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Outlaw Torn
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James' alcoholism is already getting out of hand... Anyway, this is really interesting!! :horns2
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I used to post my fics here, but stopped due to certain reasons. I've recently read my own stories all over again, and thought that I could share some of them with you, assuming you're interested in reading them. 





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8:42 PM Jul 10