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| Somebody That I Used To Know; Het, James fic, drama/romance | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: December 16, 2011, 2:04 am (14,466 Views) | |
| Voxx | January 26, 2012, 12:29 pm Post #166 |
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Some Kind Of Monster
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I will try for tonight! No promises though! I've got 6 consecutive hours of class today, no breaks And, all three are in the same room, so I don't even get to give my butt a rest from sitting on it for 6 hours How my schedule worked out like that? I'll never know! I'll try for later tonight though! |
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| Voxx | January 26, 2012, 11:18 pm Post #167 |
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Some Kind Of Monster
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Alrighty ladies, here's part 3/3 for Chapter 23. The next chapter will have some James in there for those of you who are still team James Enjoy! Chapter 23 Part 3 We quietly seated ourselves and were soon approached by a bubbly waitress. She asked for our drink order and I ordered red wine for the both of us. We quietly poured over the menus and I decided to go with something light. I chose bisque and Jason chose a simple summer salad. I also thought a cheese plate would be nice to pick at while we enjoyed our wine. When the waitress came back with the wine we placed our lunch order. She smiled politely and told us our food would be along shortly. When we were alone, I gave Jason a critical look. I knew what I was about to say was slightly untrue and a little bit manipulative, but I was starting get tired with all the secrecy. I never had withheld my dilemmas from him the way he was doing now. Perhaps a little bit presumptuous of me, but I thought he would feel better after talking about it. I know I would. I cleared my throat a little and then shook out my serviette, placing it lightly in my lap. I folded my hands in the table in front of me. Jason looked about the cafe a little nervously. I think he knew what was coming and in that moment he was looking for some sort of distraction or escape. "I think it's time we talked about Judy. Those photographs will probably be published tomorrow, here in Paris. But it won't be long, maybe a week at most, before they make their way to the States. She's going to see them Jason. Not to mention, in won't take long for the press to figure out who you are and that you're married. What do you think they're going to print next to those photos? It's not just about you anymore. It's about me too and my career. Do you know what Helmut is going to say to me when he finds out? He's going to say I told you so and then he'll complain about this huge PR mess that he has to clean up. So, in order to not damage my reputation, and be seen as some sort of dirty mistress, I need to know what's going on with you and Judy, Jase". I finished my little speech, quite proud of myself because it didn't sound too manipulative. I thought I sounded just concerned enough about my career to make him talk. I took a sip of wine to wet my mouth and waited for Jason to respond. "I don't see how holding hands can be construed as you being a dirty mistress" he said cheekily, avoiding the real issue. He took a sip of wine and smiled at me politely. I furrowed my brows and opened my mouth to speak, but the waitress came back with the cheese plate just then. It came with a number of French cheeses, preservatives, crackers, baguette and grapes. My stomach grumbled appreciatively, but I refrained from digging in right away. I waited until she left and then I glared at Jason. "Really? You're really going to pull that fake naive bullshit? You're talking to me Jason. Don't pretend to be a dumbass. Stop avoiding the issue" I snapped at him, sounding far more angry than I actually was. I even surprised myself by the bite in my tone. However, it seemed to have the desired affect because Jason seemed a little taken aback by my answer and coughed a little as he choked on a grape. I smiled sweetly and leaned over the table to pat him in the back, in the manner you would do if someone was choking. He wasn't really choking, but it didn't stop me from giving him an awful hard smack to help get my point across, all the while under the guise of being apparently helpful and concerned. He coughed a little again, surprised by the force I put into it. I leaned back, still smiling sweetly and signalled to the waitress to bring some water. She came quickly and filled two glasses from a pitcher. She set them down and then quickly scurried away. Jason took a sip of his water and then cleared his throat a little. I reached forward a cut a slice of brie and spread it on a chunk of baguette. I popped it into my mouth, savouring the creamy smoothness of the cheese and waited patiently for Jason to speak. "What the hell?" he asked me. I continued to give him a politely blank look. It was up to him now to speak. I was quite happily prepared to sit in the cafe in silence until he started talking. Childish maybe, but I wanted an explanation for his strange behaviour and odd mood. "Seriously Kat?" he demanded, sounding a little annoyed with me. "Seriously, Jason?" I countered, cattily, and childishly, referring to how I was still waiting for him to talk. I would never normally act this way. But with Jason, he didn't always listen to reason. And sometimes, it required these silly, superficial exchanges to get him to talk about his problems. Maybe it was a man thing. "You suck" he sneered at me and then he shoved a cracker into his mouth. His commented did not erase the polite expression on my face, instead I gave him a smile that was dripping with false sincerity. I waited patiently until he finally sighed in defeat. He leaned forward, took a gulp of his wine and grimaced a bit at the strong taste of the alcohol. He set his wine glass back down and gave me a less than friendly look. Nevertheless, he did speak. "Judy and I are having problems, mostly because I didn't really want to get married. In fact it was kind of forced" he finally confessed. I have admit, that all the suspicions I had about what kind of problems they might be having; Jason not wanting to be married was not one of them. I took another sip of my wine and waited for him to continue, because I knew there was more to the story. Jason picked up the knife of the cheese plate and started to pick at the Crottin de Chavignol, a beautiful goat cheese produced in the Western regions of France. I winced a little as he unceremoniously and unconsciously picked it apart. I kept my mouth shut though. After all, it was only cheese and we were only going to eat it. After a few tense moments he continued. "After you left there was tension in our relationship. I think it stemmed from the fact that she finally knew you were a woman. I don't know why I intentionally kept that from her. I think part of it may be that I knew she wouldn't like you – no offence" he added hastily as an afterthought, raising his eyes in alarm to mine, looking to see if I had been offended. I shook my head as a sign that it didn't matter to me and to continue. "I thought there would be jealousy issues and I was right because after you left she started to ask me all these questions about the nature of my living arrangement with you. She didn't like it when we talked on the phone, or if I got a letter from you. Sometimes I think she would hide the letters. The jealousy was really hard to deal with. She always looked for any opportunity to find a fault in you, Kat. She has been following your career religiously, always trying to find flaws or waiting for you to trip up and make a fool of yourself". I listen to Jason talk about Judy and I have to admit I was in shock. I didn't understand how a woman, that I had only met once and briefly, could hate me so much. I had never done a thing to her. I listened, wide-eyed, not knowing how to respond. All I could do was listen. "Everything finally came to a head one day, earlier this year; I think it was mid January". Jason paused for a moment, thinking back. He eventually nodded, took another sip of water and then continued. "She asked me one day straight up if we had ever slept together. I didn't think there would be much use in lying about it, so I told her the truth that yeah we had, once and we never came close to it ever again". Jason stopped while the waitress came over to our table with our lunch order. She placed the dishes down in front of us and asked us if we needed anything else. I politely declined and then she left. I took a spoonful of my bisque and smiled in delight at the flavour. It was perfect, just want I needed. If there was one thing I loved about living in Paris, it was the amazing food. I didn't think I’d had a bad meal out since I moved here. Jason took a few forkfuls of his salad, looking down at his plate, avoiding my inquisitive stare. Finally, I rolled my eyes at his hesitancy and asked him, "Then what? What did she do after you told her". "She got really pissed and called you all sorts of names and declared that you must have seduced me all this bullshit. The she gave me an ultimatum. She asked me to stop talking to you or she would leave me" Jason answered in between mouthfuls, mumbling a little bit as he talked with food still in his mouth. In my head, I had two thoughts. The first was that part of me could see why she was insecure about my friendship with Jason. On the one hand we were very close and our friendship wasn't exactly a conventional one. Most friends don't sleep in the same bed together night in and night out, share clothes or end up having sex together for that matter. I could also understand her being upset if Jason told her that he at one point had deep feelings for me that went beyond the bounds of friendship. So yes, I could understand the insecurity. However, giving him an ultimatum like that was a little bit unfair if you ask me. Especially considering that I was living on the other side of the ocean and we talked maybe once or twice a month due to our busy schedules and because of how expensive long-distance calling is. She should have no reason to feel insecure about her relationship with him; at least in my eyes. I also had no designs on Jason and I had been quite happy that he was dating Judy. At first, I was slightly jealous, because we spent less time together. But I quickly got over it and moved on with my life, coming to Europe. If I had designs on him, if would have made no sense for me to move thousands of miles away from him, especially considering we had been living together. Obviously, this woman was not thinking clearly. Not to mention, I was a little disturbed by her mini obsession with my career and her attempts to find faults in it. I didn't know what she thought she would accomplish by doing that, other than making herself more paranoid than she already was. I put down my spoon and looked at Jason closely, my eyes taking in everything about him, but most importantly his body language. He was tense, I could see it in the way he was sitting rigidly in his chair and how the muscles in his arms were flexed and taunt. Not to mention, there was a slight haze of anxiety in his eyes as if the worst was yet to come and he was worried about how I would take it. "Okay, so then what? Because you obviously didn't stop talking to me and you two got married". Jason rolled his shoulders a little bit as he tried to ease the tension in his body. I watched him, more than a little worried now about what he would say next. From what it sounded like so far, I had a suspicion that Judy had manipulated him and perhaps bullied him into getting married, though I hoped not. I tried to keep my expression and tone neutral and not noticeably pass judgement on his wife, but it was very difficult not to. "I told her I didn't want to break up. Other than her obsession with you, I really liked her. She's easy to talk to and intelligent and she likes to go out and have a good time, I didn't want to lose that. I didn't want to be alone" he confessed and looked at me sadly. I knew he was in a way inferring to how I had left him in San Francisco. My guilt descended upon me a little right then and I fought my body not to whither under his stare. "She said she would only stay with me if we got married as proof that I wasn't going to leave her for you and take off for Europe. At the time, I wasn't thinking clearly or rationally. I thought this way I can be with her and not lose you. So I said yes and a few weeks later we were married" Jason finished his explanation. I felt this terrible pit in my stomach for Jason. I felt awful. Despite the fact that I didn't force him to marry Judy, I still felt partially responsible for had happened to them. I wish I had been more aware of the problems they had been having, and maybe backed off a little. "Do you love her?" I asked him after I had processed everything he had said. Jason shook his head sadly. "I want to love her, but I can't. I resent her because now I'm stuck in this marriage I don't want to be in. I know she didn't force me to say yes, but I still blame her. The worse part is I know she loves me. She tells me all the time. But nothing has changed since we got married. She's still obsessed with you. I can't take it anymore. I'm so tired of listening to her talk about you every single day, as if she actually knows something about you or who you are. We stopped having sex too, right after we got married. She told me she couldn't have sex with me knowing that I had slept with you. How does that even make sense? I wasn't even with her yet for Christ's sake!" Jason declared angrily. It was my turn to feel tense and uncomfortable. We sat in the table in silence. I couldn't come up with anything to say that might make the situation better. The waitress walked by, and as a distraction, I stopped her and asked her to clear our plates and bring some coffee. She agreed happily and within a few more silent, angst ridden minutes, we had two steaming cafe au laits in front of us. I carefully poured some sugar into mine and stirred it, all the while; the cogs in my brain were turning and working furiously. I was watching Jason. He was cupping his drink in his hands, staring down into it. "Jase" I finally said, whispering his name softly. "If you don't love her, maybe you shouldn't be with her". It was the only thing that I could suggest. Why waste your time and the other person's time, if you don't love them. It's just preventing both of you from finding the person you're meant to be with. Jason raised his eyes to mine. "I know. I don't want to be with her. When I get back from tour, I'm filing for divorce. So frankly, Kat, I don't care if she sees the photos" he said a little viciously. I narrowed my eyes at him, not quite believing what he said about not wanting to be with her. "Why are you still wearing you wedding ring then?" I asked him. His eyes strayed from my own to take in the ring on his finger. He chuckled to himself a little and then his eyes found mine again. "I don't know to be honest". He then quickly took it off and slipped it into his jeans pocket. "Jason! That's not what I meant!" I exclaimed in shock. My question had not been to make him take his ring off. Rather, I had questioned the validity of his statement regarding a divorce. "Kat, it's fine. I knew it was over the moment I came on tour. I tried, I mean really tried to make her happy before I left. I waited on her hand and foot and I did my best to ignore her comments about you. I could even live without the sex until she was ready. But those first few days away from her...it was freedom. It was amazing. I felt alive! Not to mention I've cheated on her more times than I can count" he admitted, but with no remorse. I took a sip of my hot drink, carefully scrutinizing him. I still didn't buy it. I felt like there was something more. If he was so happy to be away from Judy, then what was up with his mood earlier on? Why did he come on to me? I was sure that there was something else that he was excluding. "Well that's good I suppose; the knowing what you want part, not the cheating part. I just you want you to be happy Jase. Do what make you happy. As for the photos that will inevitable be printed tomorrow; I'm actually not too concerned about them. Helmut, I'm sure, will come up with some plausible story for me to say because the press is never satisfied with the actual truth, which is we're just friends" I smiled at him, "I was only worried about them because of Judy. I can only imagine how she will react when she sees them" I mentioned thoughtfully. I decided to not press him anymore about what was bothering him. He had already divulged a lot and I thought I would be pressing my luck if I pushed him anymore. Jason returned my smile as I flagged down the waitress to get the cheque. I paid it quickly and then we left. Thankfully, when we left the cafe, the photographers had left, obviously electing to not wait around for us to come out. They had probably found someone more famous than myself to go harass, and for that I was slightly thankful. We decided to spend the rest of the afternoon just strolling about the city, enjoying the weather and some of the local shops. By hopping on and off the Metro, I was able to show him a few popular tourist must-sees including the outside of the Louvre, Place de la Bastille, Place de la Concorde, Opera Garnier, Notre Dame and of course La Tour Eiffel. There are far too many places to see in one day, but I thought if I gave him just a taste of the rich culture and history of Paris, he just might come back and visit me again. Selfish, I know. We had dinner in a quiet restaurant in the Latin Quarter and then decided to go back to my apartment when it was near ten o’clock. Because we had both had a long and tiring day, we didn't stay up too long before electing to go to bed. I went into the bathroom and changed into satin pyjama bottoms and a tank top and then I quickly washed my face and brushed my teeth. I exited the bathroom and Jason said he was going to take a shower. I nodded and then proceeded to find an extra blanket and pillow from the linen closet. While I waited for Jason to finish his shower, I played with Figuro, who was happy to see me after a long day of being out. When Jason emerged from my bedroom, freshly showered, my heart fluttered a little at the sight of his long hair all wet, that was for once, completely combed back off of his face. I took in the clean contours of his chiseled face and smiled when I saw that he looked genuinely happy for the first time since I saw him today. His newly toned body was on display as he had emerged only wearing sweats that sat low on his hips. I silently reprimanded myself for staring at him, but he looked so damn good. I knew he was walking around shirtless on purpose and I knew I should be mad at him for it, but I decided to let myself off the hook just this once and enjoy the sight before me. Careful not to drool, I reminded myself. I saw his mouth open and close a few times and it occurred to me that he asked me something as I was studying him. "Hm?" I asked, not really hearing what he had said. "What's with the blanket and pillow?" he repeated his question. I looked down at the stack beside me on the couch. "Oh, um, I'm going to sleep on the couch. You can have the bed, because I'm not too sure how comfortable the couch will be and I don't want you to hurt your back what with you being on tour and all" I explained to him. "Kat really?" he asked me surprised. His brow was furrowed and his eyes were narrowed and ablaze with annoyance. I shrugged a little. "I just don't think it's a good idea. You are still married, whether or not you're having problems". Jason shook his head at me. "Fine if you're going to be like that, I'll sleep on the couch. Don't be stupid, this is your place" he said as he slipped past me to grab the pillow and blanket. "Jason, you're a guest. I'm not letting you stay on the couch, don't be ridiculous". He started to protest and so to avoid a big long discussion about it; I took his hand in mine and led him towards the bedroom. All I wanted was to go to bed, I was exhausted. I think he thought I was going to join him in bed because he became complacent when I took his hand and followed me willingly, making no verbal objections. When I had him safely in my bedroom, I let go of his hand and gave him a kiss on the cheek and a pat on the shoulder. "Night" I said sweetly and then shuffled back towards the door. "Wait" he said catching my hand in his, holding me in place. "Stay?" he asked me quietly. His eyes will big and glassy and full of need, just to be next to someone though, not a sexual need. "Jason, I can't. I won't share a bed with a married man. It's not who I am" I said to him as kindly as I could. "I won't touch you. I'm sorry about earlier" he insisted. "We can't. Try to understand" I repeated. I gave his hand a squeeze and then let it go. He watched me sadly as I left the room and closed the door behind me. I sighed deeply and then made my way to the couch. I fluffed the pillow before settling down and pulling the blanket up around me. I intended to spend a few minutes thinking about what Jason had told me and try and figure out the unsaid part, but before I knew it, I was fast asleep. Edited by Voxx, January 27, 2012, 12:35 am.
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| Nah Bruno | January 27, 2012, 12:32 am Post #168 |
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Poor Twisted Me
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I really wanna know if Jason is hiding something! And kat and Jase are sweet together, yeah Btw, I may be on James' team still but I like Jason very much here
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| Some_Kind_Of_Monster | January 27, 2012, 4:03 am Post #169 |
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☠ (R.I.P) † Return Is Possible †
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Same here. ___ There something about Jason I don't like He is not telling here everything or knows that James wants to meet here and Jason wanted to be there first But still this is beautiful
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| Scorpion Flower | January 27, 2012, 7:10 am Post #170 |
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Outlaw Torn
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Adorable:)) Unless James shows he's changed, I am on Jason's team here. I do think they click, and i do feel a spark in there. She does feel soemthing for Jason, though I don't think she admits it. Being friends is the best cover ever:))) Isn't that what we all say? "We're just friends" LOOL |
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| Nah Bruno | January 27, 2012, 2:38 pm Post #171 |
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Poor Twisted Me
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YES.
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| Voxx | January 28, 2012, 10:45 pm Post #172 |
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Some Kind Of Monster
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LOL, yes. I would have to agree with you there. I think they're both just telling themselves that they're only friends. But there is obviously a sexual tension between them. Whether or not either of them acts on it is the real question!
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| Voxx | January 28, 2012, 11:14 pm Post #173 |
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Some Kind Of Monster
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Hello Ladies! So I'm a big liar! I know I promised James in this chapter, but I always end up writing too much and I couldn't fit him in here yet. But, the next one, I promise he will be here! Please Enjoy! Chapter 24 When I awoke the next morning, it was to the sound of the mail being dropped through the mail slot in my front door. I opened my eyes slowly and then immediately shut them as the sunlight streaming through the crack between the curtains hurt my eyes. I groaned a little at the intrusion and buried my head underneath my pillow to block my eyes from the pain of the sunlight. Sometimes, I swore I was a vampire what with my perfectly white skin and my aversion to sunlight. I even wore sunglasses when it was cloudy because my eyes still found the minimal sunlight sensitive. I kept still as I heard Figuro trotting around the den. I knew if he saw me moving he would come over and start to dance on my head until I got up to give him his breakfast. Unfortunately for me, I was in no shape to get up and get moving just yet. My night on the couch had proved to be sleepless and uncomfortable. The structural support of the couch was atrocious and I felt like I was sleep in a hammock, with my head and feet bending up higher than my middle. I was now experiencing extreme back pain. In fact, I felt like I had been run down by a train. My shoulders, lower back, hips and thighs were burning and stiff. In hindsight, I was glad that I had given Jason my bed. There was no way he would want to go up on stage and play if he was feeling the way I was feeling. I sighed a little into the pillow that was resting on my face. My hot breath was trapped by the weight of the pillow and I inhaled it again and again as I laid there. Finally, when I started to feel like I was suffocating myself I threw the pillow off, though I had to squint my eyes against the sunlight painfully. Figuro, happy to see me awake, bounded over and jumped up onto my chest. The weight of him was enough to knock the breath out of me. He started to happily meow in my face, gently nipping at me neck. I rolled my eyes. "Okay, okay" I mumbled as I picked him up off of my chest and set him on the floor. I sat up slowly, almost immediately regretting it as my back screamed in protest. I groaned as my muscles stretched disapprovingly and my joints cracked. I decided that today I would indulge in a nice hot bubble bath. My clawfoot tub was just perfect for bubble baths because it was nice and deep. When I had finally sat up, I wilted a little against the back of the couch and closed my eyes as I stretched out my neck muscles. I was so getting a new couch. I never wanted to sleep on this piece of crap ever again. I sighed and finally pulled my body up off the couch. I slowly made my way into the kitchen, walking like an invalid, and opened the cupboard to get Figuro’s food. He was meowing noisily at me, weaving between my legs and rubbing his face affectionately against me. I poured his food into his bowl and then refreshed his water, giving his head a small pat while he eagerly devoured his breakfast. I then proceeded to pull back the curtains from the windows in the kitchen and then I went back into the den and pulled back those curtains too. I opened the doors to the balcony to let the cool morning air in. I shivered a bit when I felt it touch my skin and wrapped my arms around myself, though I enjoyed the feeling of wind on my skin. It was refreshing and held the hint of the autumn season on it. I smiled as I went back inside at the thought of the changing of the seasons. Autumn was my favourite season and I missed it when I had lived in San Francisco. I then went over to the front door to collect the mail on the floor before Figuro tore it to shreds; he had a tendency to do that. I leaned down and picked up the stack, shuffling through it quickly. A few bills, a letter from my parents, a magazine I had done a spread in, the morning paper. And then I stopped as I came to a brown manila envelope. It was just like the other one, no postage or address on the front, just my name written carefully in the centre in a neat cursive. My mouth went dry and I heard my heart pounding in my ears, drowning out all the sounds from the busy morning rush outside the balcony. My hands started to shake as I carefully began to tear the top of the envelope open. I stopped when the top was opened it. I was truly afraid of what I would find inside. I swallowed hard and closed my eyes as black started to invade my vision. I reached a hand out for the counter top to steady myself. I opened my eyes and carefully turned the envelope over in my hands. I took a deep breath and then decided to look later, once Jason had left. I knew whatever I found, it would upset me and I knew that I didn’t want Jason to get involved. I set the mail down on the counter, took the other brown manila envelope that was already there and then placed it, along with the new one inside a large encyclopaedia that was on my bookshelf in the den. I shivered again, this time not from the cool morning air, rather, from the cold dread of what I was almost certain I would find inside the envelope. I took a deep a second breath, trying to calm myself and keep m head clear, and went back into the kitchen. I would try my best to put it in the back of my mind to deal with later. I put the kettle on to make coffee and then began preparations to make crepes. I decided to fill them with strawberries, bananas and little bit of shaved dark chocolate a hazelnut powder. I mixed the batter and then began then began to cook the crepes. I took the kettle off of the burner and poured the boiling water into the French press to make coffee, which I then set on the breakfast bar. I set out two plates, cutlery and mugs next to the coffee. When the crepes were cooked, I put the rest of the ingredients inside of them and set them on the plates. I looked at the gastronomic display before me and was more than satisfied. I made my way over to my bedroom door and quietly knocked on it in case Jason was already awake. When I didn’t hear an answer from within, I knocked one last time, a little more loudly. When there was still no answer, I quietly opened the door and crept inside. Jason was still sleeping. He was laying face down, his head turned to the side and his hair spilled messily across his face. His arms were tucked up and underneath the pillow that he rested his head on. The sheets were bunched down around his waist and the sunlight was streaming in through the open window to bathe his smooth milky skin in a golden glow. Sometime in the night he must have opened the window for some fresh air. I slowly approached the bed and put a warm hand onto Jason’s cool back. I gently shook him and leaned down to whisper in his ear. "Jason, wake up". When he didn't respond, I shook him a little more forcefully. "Jase, wake up. I made you breakfast" I bribed him. He stirred a grunted a little as he started to come to. His eyes opened and I smiled at him. "Morning". I spoke softly, not quite whispering, but not talking at a normal volume yet either. "Did you sleep okay?" I asked Jason as I gently swept his hair out of his eyes. He raised his head and supported his weight on his forearms. He yawned a little, blinking slowly a few times. "Mhm" he mumbled sleepily. "Did you say something about breakfast?" he asked me hopefully. I smiled at him. "Yeah, it's waiting for you on the counter. I'm just going to get dressed and then I'll join you" I told him as I walked towards my wardrobe. I chose a pair of jeans and a simple long sleeved shirt. I then opened a drawer to choose a bra and pair of panties. After I made my selection I turned to go into the bathroom. I saw that Jason was still lying in bed. He had rolled over though and was staring at the ceiling, arms covering his eyes. I smiled and walked over to the bed, wincing a little as I still felt the pain in my back from my night on the couch. "Hey, time get up. Breakfast will get cold and I worked really hard on it" I teased him. Jason groaned again but he removed the arm that was covering his eyes to look up at me. "I'm tired" he complained. "Can't you serve it to me on a tray in here?" he asked jokingly, though I could tell from the mischievous sparkle in his eye that he was secretly hoping I would say yes. I jabbed him playfully in the ribs and laughed as he instinctively sat up, curling over to protect himself. "What do I look like? A slave?" I asked him still laughing. Jason looked up at me and before I could identify what the glint in his eye meant, he had grabbed my wrist pulling me forward, using his shoulder to put me off balance. I stumbled into him, falling, but he easily supported my weight, deftly picking me up and flipping me onto the bed so that I was laying on my back and he was laying half on me, though the majority of his weight he supported himself as he hovered above me. The clothes I had been carrying scattered everywhere as I dropped them. "Yes" he answered me wickedly, a smile playing on his lips. His curls were cascading down around him, gracing the top of my chest lightly. "You're my slave. You have to do as I say" he ordered me, though I could see that he was playing with me. I was about to respond, but then I noticed that the sheet had been pulled down slightly when Jason had pulled me down onto the bed. From over his shoulder I could see the nude curve of his ass and I realized that he was naked underneath. I blushed self-consciously. Jason saw and he grinned down at me. "What?" he asked me. "You're naked!" I exclaimed feeling slightly embarrassed, though I couldn't suppress a giggle that escaped my throat. I covered my mouth feeling even more embarrassed as I laughed like a giddy, little girl. Jason laughed and then rolled to the side so that we were lying side by side on our backs. "Look at you! You're acting like you've never see a naked man" he smiled at me. "Yeah, it was hot last night. I opened the window, but it didn't help. I was dying. I needed relief!". I smiled at him. I knew how hot it could get in here. The building was old and wasn't fitted with any central air system. Sometimes keeping it warm during the winter was also a challenge. Jason rolled onto his side and propped his head up on his hand and returned me smile. The sheet fell dangerously low and I made conscious effort to keep my attention focused on his face. Jason reached over and pushed my hair out of my face, smoothing it down, his fingers lingering on my cheek for a moment before he pulled his hand away. That slight touch was enough to ignite something deep within my soul and my stomach lurched in response. It had been a long time since someone had touched me tenderly like that and I would be lying if I said my body didn't crave more of it. I fought not to shiver or lean into his touch. "I wish I could stay here with you. Everything is so much simpler" he whispered, almost like a confession, his blue eyes bearing into me. He wasn't smiling anymore. He looked lost in thought and a little unsure. I studied him carefully and couldn't help but notice again that there was something there just beneath the surface that he hadn't addressed, but it was obviously weighing heavily on him. It made me sad to see him like this. "But you love music and touring" I said encouragingly trying to lighten the mood a little. He smiled sadly. "Yeah" though he didn't sound too enthusiastic or convinced by his own words. I looked at him quizzically, wondering if this was the right moment to ask him about what else was bothering him. I chewed my lip thoughtfully and looked up at the ceiling weighing my words carefully. I wanted to ask. I opened my mouth to speak, still staring at the ceiling when I felt the bed shift as Jason threw back the sheet and got out of bed. I closed my eyes to block out the sight of his nude body as he walked towards the bathroom. "I'll be out in a minute" he called to me as he shut the door quietly. I heard the water turn on. I opened my eyes and sighed. Maybe over breakfast I could broach the subject. I quickly gathered the scattered clothes I had chosen and slipped into them, leaving my pyjamas sitting on the chair in front of my vanity. I looked at my reflection in the mirror and wasn't surprised to see small dark circles under my eyes from my lack of sleep last night. I quickly rubbed some eye cream on under my eyes and then tied my long hair up into a bun. I left my room and went back into the kitchen. The coffee had been steeping long enough, so I pushed the press down and then poured two cups. I was preparing our cups to each of our likings when Jason emerged from my bedroom fully dressed. He smiled at the breakfast before him and sat down next to me at the breakfast bar. "Okay, I'm impressed. These are delicious!" he exclaimed as he dug into the crepes. I smiled my appreciation and thanks at him because my mouth was full of crepe too. We ate in silence for a few moments before it was broken by Jason clearing his throat nervously. "Can I ask you something kind of personal?". I gave him a sidelong look as I took a sip of coffee. "Only if I can ask you something in return". He nodded slowly, "Okay, I guess that's fair". Jason popped his last morsel of crepe into his mouth, chewed and then swallowed it. He set his knife and fork down, placing his hands in his lap. "I just want to know if you've been with anyone since James". "Do you mean had sex with someone?" I asked him, wanting to make sure I understood his question. "Yeah". "No, I haven't. I haven't even been on any dates since James. If I'm honest, I haven't had any burning desire to". I answered him honestly. In fact, until this morning when Jason caressed my cheek, my body hadn't even been craving any kind of contact from a man. I decided to be completely honest with him about my time here in Paris. "Actually, after I moved here, I had to explain to Helmut that I was a little nervous about doing photo campaigns with male models and having to pose intimately with them. Of course I had to explain why, and he understood. He helped me find a councilor to talk to. I saw him for about a year. He's really helped me work through a lot of the hang ups and issues I was having over..." I trailed off knowing that Jason would be able to fill in the black. "Anyways, the modelling with men isn't an issue for me now. I just don't know if I'm ready to have sex yet, with anyone. My councilor helped me to realize that what happened wasn't my fault. I mean I know I could have slept on the couch or made James sleep on the couch or I could have said no more forcefully. I could have done a number of things differently. But the reality is, I didn't. And I can't keep tormenting myself with thinking about all these "what ifs". Ultimately, what happened was the direct consequence of James' actions, or inability to control his actions, drunk or not. He can't hide behind the alcohol. But at the same time, I learned to accept my role in what happened too, because in the end, I did say yes to him, even if I didn't want to" I explained to Jason. Jason had listened silently and nodded a little while I spoke. When I finished our eyes met and he looked at me sadly. I wished he wouldn't, because I didn't feel like a victim he thought I was, at least not now. I was about to tell him that but he stopped me with a question that I had asked myself countless times before I had an answer for it. "Do you forgive him?". "Yes" I answered without hesitation. Jason breathed out heavily and shook his head, his eyes clouding over in anger. I could tell he was on the verge of spewing out an angry tirade but I stopped him, taking his hand in mine and giving it a squeeze. "Look at me" I commanded him. His eyes raised his eyes to mine and I could see the storm brewing inside of him, turning his blues to a dark stormy grey. "I forgive him because I can't spend my whole life hating someone like that. It's too much energy. I would rather put my energy into positive things. I don't want that cross to bear for my whole life. So I forgave him. And If I ever see him again, which I’m sure I will, I'll tell him. And I can only hope that he'll forgive me in return for being cruel to him afterwards". I let go of Jason's hand and started to clear our dishes away. He sighed heavily and stood up to help me. I filled the kitchen sink full of hot water and soap and began to wash the breakfast dishes. Jason stood next to me and picked up a dish towel to dry them. It was a familiar scene, one that I could play over in my mind a thousand times of us in San Francisco. It made my heart ache. "I understand what you're saying Kat. But I don't forgive him. You just don't do that to a woman. Ever. Period". I nodded as I handed him a plate to dry. "I know Jason" I replied gently though I felt a little uncomfortable standing next to him. "My turn now". He raised an eyebrow at me but waited silently for me to ask my question. "What else is bothering you, other than your marriage and personal issues with James?" I asked him slowly, hoping he actually answer and not just shut me down. He sighed. "Kat, really?". "Jason! I can tell there's something else that you're not telling me!" I exclaimed and I turned to face him, arms crossed over my chest. "I just want to be able to help you" I pleaded with him, "You're always there for me, but you never let me be there for you". "It's just band stuff Kat. It's just hard sometimes. The guys, they still miss Cliff. It's harmless hazing crap" he answered stiffly and he continued to dry the plate in his hands, despite the fact that it was already dry. I gently took the plate from his hands and set it on the counter. "If it's bothering you, it's not harmless" I said quietly, but firmly. "It's fine. I don't want to get into it. Just forget about it, okay. Let's enjoy the time we have here together before I have to leave" Jason answer, put a lid on that particular conversation. He put the dish towel down and then grabbed the paper off of the counter and taking it into the den to flip through. I smiled to myself because it was in French and I knew he wouldn't be able to read a word of it. But if he wanted to use it as a way to walk away from the conversation, I was prepared to grant him that because I knew he would throw it down in frustration sooner or later. As he flipped through the paper, I put all the dried dishes away. I was just putting the last dish, my large iron skillet, away when Jason called to me. "Looks like we made the paper" he said thoughtfully. I walked around the breakfast bar into the den, wincing a little as I felt my poor muscles strain painfully. I sat down next to Jason and looked at the section he was looking at. It was the back of the paper, in the arts section. There was a small blurb next to three photos of us walking hand in hand in the Tuileries. We were smiling and in one of the photos, Jason had his arm around my waist and I was smiling up at him happily. I cringed a little because we really did look like a happy couple in love. "What does it say next to the photos?" he asked me. I read it quickly to myself and then translated for him. “Supermodel Katerina Plushenko, the latest face for fashion house Chanel pictured walking hand in hand through the Tuileries with her rock star boyfriend Jason Newsted, bassist for heavy metal band Metallica. Newsted joined the band in late 1986 after the death of bassist Cliff Burton in a bus crash in Sweden. Metallica is currently on tour in Europe after releasing their fourth studio album ...And Justice For All". "Interesting" Jason murmured. "Not really. Judy is going to flip if she sees this" I fired back. I know yesterday I said that Jason should do what made him happy, but actually seeing how the photos had turned out made me feel a little sick. If I was Judy, I would lose my mind if I saw these photos of my husband with a woman I hated. I felt incredibly guilty. "Don't worry about Judy. I'll deal with her when the tour is over". I turned my head and looked at Jason wide-eyed. "Isn't that a little cruel? Don't you think you should call her?" I asked him surprised. "Ah, Kat, I say this with respect and love, but really, just mind your own business. Okay?" he smiled at me and gave me back a warm pat. "Uh huh" I answered him a little dazed, but was able to keep my mouth shut about it for the rest of the morning. We spent the remainder of our morning just chatting and really catching up. I tried to explain what it was like to be a model to him and he told me about some of the shows they had played so far on tour. He surprised me when he told me they would be playing in Paris in a few weeks time. It happened to coincide with fall fashion week. Metallica was playing the day after the Chanel show. They would be flying in the night before their show and leaving early the next morning after their show. Jason promised that we would see each other then and I was glad because it meant I had something to look forward to. Just before noon I walked Jason downstairs to the street where a cab was waiting to take him to the airport where he would get on a place for Munich. The cab driver was putting his luggage in the trunk and Jason and I stood on the curb looking at each other a little awkwardly. Finally I stepped forward and put my arms around his neck, pulling him close for a hug, resting my head on his strong shoulder. He responded and wrapped his arms around my waist, holding me tight, his fingers gently stroking the thin band of flesh between my jeans and shirt. "Say hi to everyone for me will you? Tell Kirk I miss him and that I've learned a lot more vegetarian recipes so I can cook for him anytime he is in Paris" I joked warmly, though the invitation was sincere. "I will" Jason replied into my neck, his lips pressed to my flesh as he spoke. I pulled back slightly so I could look him in the eye. "I'll miss you. Call me from time to time while you tour" I reminded him. He nodded and smiled at me. "I'll miss you too. I wish I was going to be in Paris in time to see you on the catwalk!". "I'm glad you're not!" I exclaimed honestly. "I would be so nervous! I'm sure I would fall on my face" I said quite seriously and Jason chuckled in response. I looked over his shoulder at the cab driver who was looking at us impatiently. "You should go. Don't want to miss your flight! Or else I'm sure I would get a phone call from James about how I'm a bad influence or something". Jason smiled at me playfully. "He doesn't know where I am". "I'm sure he does now. Pictures" I reminded him. "Oh yeah..." he trailed off. "Go" I said and let go on him, stepping back. Jason let go of me as I stepped back, but leaned forward and planted a quick, chaste kiss on my lips. Then he turned before I had a chance to react and walked toward the cab. "See you soon" he called over his shoulder he climbed into the cab. He shut the door as the cab driver climbed in and then the cab pulled away from the curb and he was gone. I stood on the curb, my hand covering my mouth and my eyes wide in shock. Did he really just do that? And then I remembered the stupid envelope. Shit. |
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| Some_Kind_Of_Monster | January 29, 2012, 5:03 am Post #174 |
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☠ (R.I.P) † Return Is Possible †
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Where is the rest? Where is the rest? Haha! Moar
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| Scorpion Flower | January 29, 2012, 8:02 am Post #175 |
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Outlaw Torn
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I knew one of the things bothering him was all the hazing. Well, i was hoping something more intimate would happen between them, but oh well...Guess I have to wait. Now the enevelope, I am also curious to know what's in there. Bet it is a not from James or something? Though Jason said that james didn't know where he was. Wait...maybe it's Jason declaring all his love for her!!! WOOHOOO...
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| Lilith | January 29, 2012, 2:22 pm Post #176 |
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♥ Jaimelicious ♥
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That Judy is such a jealous bitch... although... if your man used to live with a girl with the looks of Chanel model... can you blame her? xD I think I'd go gorilla too! Jason and Kat are really cute together, but I'm happy she is treating him with the distance she should. I'm very curious about that envelope! Edited by Lilith, January 29, 2012, 2:24 pm.
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| Lawrah Luvsmetallica | January 29, 2012, 3:09 pm Post #177 |
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Poor Twisted Me
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Finally caught up!! Jason ... U still have feelings for her I feel two sided right now ... Moar plzz |
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| Voxx | January 29, 2012, 4:32 pm Post #178 |
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Some Kind Of Monster
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Thank you! Missed you around here I will try and post more soon, I'm writing a short paper now, but I'm being distracted by Metchicks So we'll see how it goes!But yes, Jason is still very much in love with Kat. She knows it, even if she hasn't articulated it yet! |
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| Voxx | January 29, 2012, 4:33 pm Post #179 |
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Some Kind Of Monster
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I don't count myself as a jealous person, but I'm right there with you! If my husband used live with a model, I'm be jealous of her too. Especially if he's walking around Paris, the most romantic city in the world, hand in hand with her. I don't think Judy is going to take it very well.... The envelope will be addressed soon! I promise!
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| Voxx | January 29, 2012, 4:36 pm Post #180 |
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Some Kind Of Monster
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It would be adorable if Jason sent her an envelope to declare his love for her Sadly, that's not it. It will be addressed in the next chapter. As for more intimate happenings between the two of them...maybe in the near future. Can't give away much more! But don't forget James will be in town too the next time Jason is. And I have this sneaking suspicion he is going to want to talk to Kat...
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![]](http://z1.ifrm.com/static/1/pip_r.png)
And, all three are in the same room, so I don't even get to give my butt a rest from sitting on it for 6 hours



He is not telling here everything or knows that James wants to meet here and Jason wanted to be there first


8:38 PM Jul 10