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A new Pack; James & his boys, slash, fantasy, Rehab Era
Topic Started: February 14, 2012, 7:45 pm (1,103 Views)
Sekhmet49
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Some Kind Of Monster
[ * ]
Here is another story I began on Rockfic,

I'm posting as I write it, so no promises for the delay!!

Corrected version!




Chapter 1 :


The atmosphere in the studio was unbearable. He knew it was mostly his fault, but he couldn't control anything anymore. He had been surrounded by humans far too long, getting attached to them; the absence of any sort of hierarchy was driving him insane. He had come to care about these humans and he wanted so much to finally fulfill his destined role. Really, for years now, this explosion had been waiting, and Jason's departure certainly flipped on the switch.

Jason.

Now that was a complete failure.

He knew that whatever choices he made now, he would never get him back. He had almost single-handy destroyed the kid. The other humans were at fault too, but he realized most of their behavior was tuned to his. Of course his creator would say he had never been able to care of young ones, but dammit, it's not like he wanted to mess with them. It hurt to see him leave like that, he was almost pack. When Jason had announced he was leaving, it had felt like his heart was ripped open again, almost like when...

NO, don't go there James!

A pack.

So long he had wished for one. So long he had wandered across the world. He didn't choose to stay alone. He could simply not find a place among his own kind at the time; well more like no one wanted to give him a place. He was too strong, too fast, too powerful, too much alpha, too much of a threat to other alphas He had wanted to try to NOT act as his instincts were telling him to, but even without trying he was an alpha in his pack-mates' minds.

And now, they were so few of his kind. Hunters had completely decimated his species. Real packs were extremely rare, and still considered him a danger thanks to the rumors turned into legends about him. Not that he would have helped them a lot; he had become too bitter concerning his people. But he would have appreciated to not see them run at the mere sight of him.

Now it was time to take the decision that he had stalled as long as possible; really twenty years living a lie, without changing identities (and becoming famous, doing wonders for his anonymity!) it was high time to choose his path once again.

However, he had to admit, the thought of leaving these two young people was horrible. He didn't want to imagine what his leaving would do to his barely functioning heart. He really cared for them now; his little Dane and his close-to-completely-crazy guitarist. If he couldn't control himself after Jason's departure he would surely go on a rampage if he left the last two.

Still, he didn't want to lie to them anymore. But he was lucid enough to realize in his state of anger, hurt and agitation he didn't have a chance in hell to explain things correctly. But, what excuse use in order to be able to leave for several months while avoiding suspicions from the mass of people following his movements?

Well, he supposed the everlasting excuse of alcohol could work once again.

Yes, rehab sounded like a good idea. Of course, only a week in the wild would cure him of any addiction, but they didn't need to know that...yet.

Once he came back, he would be in control and able to explain things correctly.




So, want to read more?! :P
Edited by Sekhmet49, March 25, 2012, 6:27 pm.
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Lilith
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Jaimelicious

I'm intrigued!
Must admit I looove wolf metaphors involving James... :drool
Go on! :horns2
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Achernar
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I want my dragon back :c
[ * ]
YES. I want to read more. This is pretty interesting, I'm gonna follow this, cuz it's subtle and intriguing.
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Sekhmet49
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Some Kind Of Monster
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Thanks!

And, Lilith, who said anything about a wolf?!! :biggrin :biggrin You'll have to wait and see!! :lol:

Here's the 2nd Chapter :

Corrected version!




Chapter 2 :

(James POV)

One year. Twelve months. Three hundred sixty-five days. So many hours, and he still had to force himself to stop counting. If he had any lasting doubt about leaving his boys or not, the decision became definite after the very first two weeks of loneliness. One week to burn off alcohol and other shit, and after another week without them, he was already completely lost. Never had one of his self-imposed exiles been so difficult before. Every cell in his body, every inch of his mind was screaming at him to go back, to return to them.

He took two full months to be able to think rationally; then he was able to begin the real purpose of his exile: returning to his true nature to become his true self again. Of course he was not assured of their reactions, but he thought he knew his boys well enough to predict their responses.

At first they would be angry that he kept this big secret from them, that he didn't trust them enough, that all the shit he made them bear could have been avoided. Only after that would they be open to discussion. He hoped they would not reject him. At least he was sure they would not spread his secret to all.

However, he didn't want them to see what he had become. His real self was the reflection of his life, even hidden under illusions, and with the life he lead with Metallica, well he truly looked pathetic.

He wanted them to be able to be proud of him. As strange as it may seem, their opinion of him mattered, even if he was an alpha.

It took a lot of time. He had to redo a big part of his training, to reacquire his workout routine (not exactly a human one...), to think on his past choices, on Metallica.

Now, here he was, in front of the HQ, way past sunset, observing from the back his two most precious people relaxing. They seemed stressed, for lack of a better word. He could tell without indulging too much in his “mighty attitude” that he was the biggest reason behind it, and he felt guilty for it even if he knew it was necessary.
He didn’t have the slightest idea on how approach them after this long absence. Yet with his complete lack of tact, it was probably better to go with the flow; although he would tone down his presence as much as he could.



(Kirk POV)

One year. Twelve months. Three hundred sixty-five days. So many hours, and he still felt his absence as acutely as the first days. Amazing how you could convince yourself the presence of someone had become unbearable, that you had come to dislike this person and yet when the person disappeared, you were filled with a void.

A void that no one else was able to occupy.

Looking at his friend he knew he's not the only one that felt lost without him around. It had been so long since he had had any contact with James.
James.

After so many years together in the band, his name still held this mysterious attractive quality. He wouldn't be able to explain it if his life depended on it, but being around James, you always sensed like a great danger was nearby, yet not threatening you, only the outside world, always protecting you.

He had been embarrassed many times because when he was feeling down becase all he wanted was to curl around James and cling to him until the episode passed. Of course, he never tried; he liked his life thank you very much! An angry Hetfield, was just totally frightening! There was the destructive anger that the whole world knew about James, but there also was the frigid calm I-won't-say-a-word-until-I've-calmed-down-enough-to-not-kill-you rage that invariably made you want to beg for forgiveness. Even if you knew you were right all along! It was infuriating! He didn't understand how James' emotions could influence him so much. He felt like a puppy next to him, even when he was in a good mood and listening to his ideas (which was exceedingly rare) he still sensed some sort of gap between their worlds.

As it were, they were currently stuck concerning the new album. Ironic, he and Jason passed so much time bitching about Lars and James being the only two “allowed” to compose; but without James around, ideas just stayed blocked somewhere in their brain; not even Lars came up with something.

He wondered why.

“You have a question Hammett?” Lars asked seriously and somewhat softly.

Well, if he had an opportunity to ask away...

“Hum... It's just... for previous albums, you did a lot of work on the music, but now... well... you seem a bit stuck too... I was just wondering why...” he finished almost in a whisper; Lars was less scary than James, but he could be set off for the slightest things.

Lars sighed. “I'm sure you know why. I don't do creation by myself; usually, I just try to improve what James puts on paper and without him here...”

The last part was all but choked; illustrating it was just as difficult as for Lars . He decided to dare a move.

He wanted comfort.

“Lars... Can I ...get a hug from you?” rushed out of his mouth.



(Lars POV)

One year. Twelve months. Three hundred sixty-five days.

So many hours with a part of you missing.

Agony.

There was simply not another word to describe the incredible emptiness inside of him.

The last time they saw each other, he had screamed at him. Only this time, he hadn’t yelled back. He just looked at him like he was seeing him for the first time; he left for his room and came out an hour later with a bag. He had just observed Kirk and him for a while. He was ready for the delayed shooting match; it was just expected from James to have the last word. He should have known, underestimating James had always been his problem, yet once again he made the mistake. James announced he was leaving for rehab.

He was so sure James wouldn't last a month without indulging, but he did. And he did it alone, refusing any contact with them, effectively proving he could survive very well without them. However, the same couldn't be said about Kirk and him.

Speaking of Kirk, he could see he was thinking about James again, with the miserable face he was wearing, yet he looked like he wanted to ask him something...

“You have a question Hammett?” he asked softly, because for once they were just two friends missing someone, not some metal stars.

The reply was hesitatingly delivered.

“Hum... It's just... for previous albums, you did a lot of work on the music, but now... well... you seem a bit stuck too... I was just wondering why...” Kirk finished almost in a whisper.

Ah, he was afraid he was gonna blow a gasket, well not tonight; tonight it felt like something was about to happen.

“I'm sure you know why. I don't do creation by myself; usually, I just try to improve what James puts on paper and without him here...” The rest was left unsaid but understood by the both of them.

How could two people feel alone?

“Lars... Can I ...get a hug from you?” rushed out of Kirk's mouth.

Well he supposed two people could be alone together.

“Come here Hammett.”



(Narrative)

They just bathed in each other strength for a while before something called to their attention. It was like anticipation was mounting, but mounting for what?

They didn't yet know it but their wait had come to an end.

After an indeterminate amount of time resting in each other arms, they got the impression they were being observed. On a non concerted agreement they opened their eyes at the same time, only to have their breaths blown away.

There in the passage, standing against the wall scrutinizing them, was James.

Their very own James Hetfield.

And what James it was.

Words would not do justice to the man.

Lars and Kirk had the same thought running through their heads: Oh fucking shit...

And apparently, their opinion was quite obvious, because they saw the dreaded but so sexy Hetfield smirk appear. However, this smirk was different, softer, more affectionate maybe. They could even see a hint of nervousness in his eyes. It was amazing; it was so rare to see James open up even just a little bit.

Obviously, none of the three of them knew how to go from there. That is until Kirk, in an uncharacteristic move from him, jumped from the sofa they were on and toward James, only stopping mere centimeters from him, apparently just realizing he was about to jump on James Hetfield who was not really a touchy person.

Plainly, he didn't know how to repair the situation, but they were both surprised when James simply opened his arms and waited with a soft smile for Kirk to take the last step; which he took, quasi trembling from the amount of emotions crashing down on him.

“James...” he sighed.



(Kirk)

It was incredible. For a moment he thought he had already made a mistake this soon after his return, but then he finally got the chance to be close to James. In fact he was fairly sure at some point he tried to bury himself in the feel of James. He couldn't wait any longer. He had to know. He looked up and became trapped in a pair of warm icy blue eyes.

“James.... you...”

He couldn't even bring himself to ask the question. The mere possibility of a negation was too frightening...

His struggle must have been apparent as James answered the unasked question, with two direct gazes at each one of them.


“I'm back”
Edited by Sekhmet49, March 25, 2012, 6:30 pm.
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Lilith
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Jaimelicious

Oh, my! I wonder how the boys will take James' change. And how will he deal with this new dynamic in their relationship.
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Achernar
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I want my dragon back :c
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Yes. the tension. you can feel it at your side...

I need to know how lars and kirk actions will be now, with this new james.

Keep.the.good.work!!! 0__0
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Sekhmet49
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Some Kind Of Monster
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Thanks you two!

The next chapter is in creation in my little head!! :D

I think I'll go to the James' pictures thread to inspire my description of him... Purely for creation purposes of course, I won't drool... at all... :rolleyes: :biggrin
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Lilith
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Sekhmet49
February 16, 2012, 5:56 am
I think I'll go to the James' pictures thread to inspire my description of him... Purely for creation purposes of course, I won't drool... at all... :rolleyes: :biggrin
Suuuuure! :P
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Olyamet
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Jäger.....

Okay! I finally got here.. sorry it took me so long.

I like were it's going! I like it very much!
And very intrigued by James 'change'. :horns:
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Sekhmet49
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Some Kind Of Monster
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Thanks Olya!

I'll try to not be too distracted by all these wonderful fics around here and come up with an update!!
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Sekhmet49
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Some Kind Of Monster
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Hi people! :dance

Here's the long awaited update!

Enjoy!




Chapter 3:


Right now, uncomfortable would be the understatement of the century.

On Lars and Kirk’s parts, once the elation to have James back was over, came a time for interrogations.

It had been one full year since they had last seen or talked to each other. Not that their last meetings were really worthy of remembrance.

On James’s part, he was so scared that he could actually admit it to himself!

He was about to reveal his deepest secret, his most profound fears and scarred past, to his two most precious friends. Frightening didn’t even cover it.

“I guess it’s… explanation time?” He asked shakily.




Kirk’s POV:

Did his voice just shake? But what could make the great mighty Hetfield ungrounded? He couldn’t be scared, could he?



Lars’s POV:

“Did your voice just shake Hetfield? Are you actually unsure of yourself? No, it can’t be, otherwise the world would be ending!” he exclaimed bitterly.

What the…? Why was his mouth not linked to his brain anymore? Seriously, did you have to attack him right away, Ulrich?

His berating only increased once he saw the results his words had on James.

Face set in stone. Closed off expression. Unreadable eyes.

Well fuck, he’s returned only for a few minutes and you’re already on his case and back to square one.

“Feels like you never left init?”

Smooth Ulrich, smooth. Keep going that way. You’re on a good roll to fully lose your best friend.

Huh? Why is he looking all kind now?

“You said that aloud Lars” Kirk helped softly.

Oops…

After another tensed silence, unexpectedly, James restarted the flow. And with an attempt at lightening the mood no less!

“Well… maybe you need to take some photos outside, to immortalize the end of the world?”

Pause. Complete stop. Did James Hetfield just somewhat admit aloud that he’s scared?

“Yes Lars, I did say that,” came the dry reply.

What, but?

“And no, you didn’t say it aloud again”

Huh…

His confusion was interrupted by Kirk’s snickers, which only increased while he glared at him.

“What’s so funny Hammet?”



Kirk’s POV

“It’s not exactly funny per see. Only, you still have this ability to read each other without words. Well, James still does actually.”

“I could do it too, Hammett! What do you think you’re…?”

James cleared his throat to interrupt them.

“I can come back later if you want.”

“NO!” They both shouted.

While he could feel the heat rising to his cheeks, Lars actually looked sheepish before settling on angry.

“Don’t you dare leaving again Het!”

Heh, heh, things are already going back to normal. He called him Het, which obviously pleased James going by his smile. However, it was a different smile than what they’re used from him. Neither huge nor tiny, it actually reached his eyes, making them shine with a new light.

And here, he’d almost convinced himself James was not THAT attractive. Pfft, all that work for nothing. Well, he tried, right?



Lars’s POV

That smile…

Holy shit, he’s screwed.

One look at this smile and the light in his eyes, he was gone.

Fuc%#g attractive and hot as hell asshole!

It’s not fair! Why can’t he stay the brooding repulsive drunk? It was easier to hate him then.

Oh, who was he kidding, he’d never been able to hate James. It’s like his genetic code stops him.

Okay, stop right now Ulrich. This a matter reserved for lone thinking, not in company. Especially not this one.

“So, we’ll get an explanation anytime soon, or not?”

There. Better to direct the conversation in safer waters. Unless…

“You want to avoid your thoughts Uli?” He asked with a mischievous look.

That man. Why did he want him back again? Some fucking best friend.

He was not even trying to act as if his glare bothered him! Damn him!

“And are you not procrastinating our talk, maybe?” He gave back.

There, that ought to shut him up.

Uh oh, what’s it with this face, now? Does he even want to know what could possibly make Het hesitate?

The said man took a – very – deep breath.

“Alright. Explanation time…?”

“Are you asking or telling?”

That got him an answer he’s used to. James growled.

“Can you at least try to shut up a minute Pixie?”

No. He didn’t blush. He did NOT!



And so it was with different kinds of trepidation that they made themselves comfortable for the upcoming difficult conversation.
Edited by Sekhmet49, June 4, 2012, 6:22 pm.
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Lilith
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Jaimelicious

Poor James, lol, Lars is not making it easy for him. lol

Quote:
 
That smile…

Holy shit, he’s screwed.

One look at this smile and the light in his eyes, Lars was gone.


I can see that totally happening! :drool
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Achernar
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I want my dragon back :c
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ficCanon: Nobody can resist James

Lawl. Lars can't keep his mouth closed. :b
-------------------

Light, precise. With variety of voices.
Just how I like it.

will be waiting the next chapter ;D
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Sekhmet49
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Some Kind Of Monster
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Thank you so much girls! I Love receiving feedbacks! :dance
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Metallica 4 Life!
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Poor Twisted Me
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I am freaking loving this story!!!! But please............don't leave us hangin for 3 months again, I don't think my impatient heart can stand it :lol: :lol: :lol: Awesome work Sekhmet!
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