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Father of the Year; Kirk is going to get even with Lars. Het.
Topic Started: July 3, 2007, 9:40 pm (14,622 Views)
Verity
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The Story Girl
[ * ]
I had a good ole time with this chapter. And I'm thrilled y'all arent sick of this.
I'm in a kick ass hotel now. they even have in room coffee makers so I can get my caffiene. :lol: I'm on a weird sleep schedule too 10 AM-2PM, but it's all good, and I found time to write.

So without further delay. :dance



Chapter 89- Geography Lessons with James



Barnabas picked Cecily up from school and brought her back to Josephine’s villa. Usually, the little girl was bubbling with tidbits about her school day but today the driver noticed that she was very, very, quiet.

“You’re awfully mellow today Miss Cecily,” Barnabas said as he glanced at her through the rearview mirror. “You’re either stoned, or that Jeffries boy picked on you again.”

“I don’t think that I’m stoned,” sighed Cecily as she gazed out the window. “Cliff said that on my fifteenth birthday that he’ll let me get stoned with him. “And Peter Jeffries, yuck! I don’t even want to talk about him.”

“I’m sorry that he’s picking on you again,” said Barnabas as he turned into the driveway.

“Everyone’s picking on me,” said Cecily glumly. “I hope this Social Services thing goes okay this afternoon. I don’t want to be sent back. Having everyone in school pick on me, plus being sent back would be too much for me to handle. I'd die of a brokenheart.” She added dramatically.

“We don’t want you to be sent back either,” said Barnabas as he turned around to face Cecily. “It’s been much more fun around here with a little girl around.”

“Even though I’m a stupid little girl?” asked Cecily as she got out of the car.

Barnabas couldn’t help but be a mite confused. The last that he had heard, Cecily had smoked through all of her readers and was doing well. Why was she calling herself stupid?

Cecily dropped her book bag on the floor next to one of Metallica’s many amplifiers that were now strewn all over Josephine’s tidy villa, and made her way to the kitchen. James was sitting at the island working his way through a box of cracker jacks, and a bottle of Beck’s. He was clean shaven, his blonde hair was freshly washed and smelled of sunflowers, and with it still wet he had slicked it back in a tight ponytail. He wore a blazer over his Grosch beer T-shirt, and his least ripped pair of jeans.

“You look nice today Mr. James,” said Cecily as she sadly plopped down at the table.

“It’s all for you kiddo,” James replied. “Got to look good for the Social Services interview. It’s not for the ladies. I don’t have to get hooched up to bed the ladies because I’m well packaged, you know.”

“Packaged?” Cecily asked.

“You’ll find out soon enough,” said James. “Anyway, I’m going to do my best to convince them that you and Cliff kick ass together.”

“Cliff kicks ass,” said Cecily. “But I don’t. I’m a dummy.”

“Dummy?” James snorted and began to raid the refrigerator for more food. “How is Little Miss Smart Ass a dummy?”

Cecily burst into tears right there at the kitchen table. She put her head down on the table and cried. James wasn’t quite sure what to do. It looked like something for Cliff to handle, but he was in the sunroom trying to get to know Emily better. He couldn’t disrupt him at the moment.

“If it makes you feel any better Cecily, I failed the sixth grade and had to go to summer school,” James offered. This sent Cecily into high pitched howls.

“They all laughed at me!” she cried. “Everyone! Even Mandie.”

“Mandie that little blond haired bitch!” James declared. “I’ll kick that little slunt’s ass.”

“She hates me now,” sighed Cecily. “She has a right to though. I’m stupid. Absolutely fucking stupid.”

“If you tell me what’s grinding your ass, I won’t tell Cliffy that you just said fucking,” said James.

“I have to do a presentation for school on Iowa,” lamented Cecily.

“Oh Cecily!” groaned James. “How terrible! That totally blows and sucks all ass. No wonder you’re upset.”

“The worst part is when the teacher told me that I would be presenting on Iowa, I asked her what Iowa was,” cried Cecily. “Everyone laughed, and Peter Jeffries even whispered “dummy” into my ear because I had never heard of it before.”

“You’ve never heard of Iowa before?” James asked.

“I grew up in Denmark remember?” Cecily said. “I know nothing about the United States. I don’t know the names of the states. I didn’t even know where San Francisco was on the map.”

“That’s okay Cecily,” said James as he popped open another Beck’s. “I can’t read a map either. Look, if you need help learning about the geography of the United States you’ve come to the right place.”

“To someone who can’t read a map?” Cecily asked skeptically through tears.

“Cecily, I’ve traveled all over the fucking place,” said James confidently. “I’ve been from one end of this fucking country to the other and back many a time. So has Cliff, and Kirk, and even Lars. We’ll help you.”

“Have you been to Iowa?” Cecily asked hopefully.

“Fuck yeah. Iowa,” James sighed. “I know lots about Iowa.”

“Where is Iowa?” Cecily asked as she took out her notebook and pen.

“In the middle of bumfuck nowhere,” said James as he took a gulp of beer.

“What’s in Iowa?” Cecily asked as she furiously scribbled down notes.

“Laura,” James said dreamily. He plopped down on a kitchen stool and put his hand over his balls. “She wasn’t the best sex that I’ve ever had. That was in Tampa, another place that you need to learn about. She wasn’t the worst either. That was in Michigan somewhere. But the cool thing about Laura was she was the first married woman that I slept with. It was July 1984, hot as all fuck. We didn’t even go to a motel room. We did it in the bathroom at the Kum and Go gas station. Pretty ironic name huh?”

“Gee Mr. James,” said Cecily as she put down her pen. “I didn’t know that Iowa was so exciting…”

***
Meanwhile, in the sunroom Cliff and Emily were trying to somewhat get to know each other. They were dressed nicely (well Emily was at least, and Cliff did borrow Kirk’s spiffy denim blazer once again) for the Social Services people. They sat across from each other on whicker chairs.

“The weather has been nice,” Cliff commented as he sat there like a log.

“I guess,” said Emily as she looked away.

Silence. Part of the reason that things were so awkward for Cliff was the fact that he wasn’t sure if Emily was Kirk’s woman or not. Mrs. Hammett sure seemed to think so, and he didn’t want to hurt Kirk. He and Kirk had been such good friends, and Kirk was perfect for Emily. They both could sew, stitch, and do fine embroidery. Plus, Kirk was clean shaven and smelled nice. Didn’t Emily deserve that? Didn’t Kirk deserve Emily? Still, he couldn’t help but feel a slight inkling of resentment towards Kirk. He always got the finer puss.

“It might rain tonight,” Cliff finally said again. He began to play with the edges to one of his nicotine patches.

“Yeah,” Emily agreed. She frowned at Cliff. “Don’t fuck with your patches,” she snapped. “You’ll only make them dirty, and you’ll wear the sticky off.”

“Oh yeah,” Cliff replied, blushing. He threw on Kirk’s denim blazer. He would have to wear the damn thing anyway to cover up the patches. “Sometimes they’re uncomfortable,” he complained.

“Are they helping?” Emily asked sympathetically.

“For the most part,” Cliff answered. “They make me able to function. They take care of my shakes and headaches.” He looked at her. “Can you keep a secret?”

Emily nodded.

“Just between you and me, but I snuck a cigarette this morning after I dropped Cecily off at school. I’m a pathetic fuck loser.”

“That’s terrible Cliff!” Emily exclaimed. “Don’t fall off the wagon.”

“I’m know,” Cliff sighed. “I guess I’m just nervous over meeting with these Social Services people.”

“You shouldn’t be,” Emily told him reassuringly. “After all, you did already pass muster with Miss Thelma. She’ll put in the good word for you.”

“You’re right,” Cliff replied, smiling at Emily for the first time. “It should go well. I’m just so worried about losing Cecily. I like having her around, and she has good taste in music. She makes me laugh, and most of all, she makes me feel loved. She looks up to me.”

“Oh dear,” Emily teased. “The poor girl.”

“You bitch!” Cliff shot and he tossed one of Aunt Josephine’s fine needlepoint throw pillows at her. Emil ducked and instead it hit one of Josephine’s exotic looking palm plants that decorated the sunroom. Emily picked up the pillow, and chucked it back at Cliff. It smacked him on the head. Cliff let out a shriek, and then picked up one of the seat cushions, and began to smack Emily with it playfully, yet gently at the same time.

“You better stop or else I’ll hide your nicotine patches!” Emily threatened. Her very neatly done French twist fell down, spilling her long, bushy, hair down over her face. She located a cushion and began to smack Cliff back.

“What the fuck!” Announced James as he, Kirk, and Lars strolled into the room at the sound of all the shrieking and laughter. Feathers from the pillows were flying all over the place.

“Oh looky!” Kirk gasped. “A pillow fight. I adore pillow fights! Let’s join them.” He eagerly grabbed a cushion pillow, but Lars grabbed him by the back of his shirt.

“You’re not in the third grade anymore Hamster,” he snarled. “And Cliff wonders why he gets absolutely zero to none action. He gets a perfectly fine girl alone in the room with him, and instead he chooses to beat the shit out of her with a pillow.”

“Aye,” agreed James as he strolled over to the mini bar to get liquored up before Social Servcies arrived. “If I were alone in a room with that Emily chick, I’d had her clothes off already.”

By now, Emily had the force over Cliff. She was whacking him over and over with the cushion. “Take that! And that!” she exclaimed. “And no more sneaking cigarettes while Cecily is at school!”

Just then, the doorbell rang. They were here! Cliff’s stomach tied up into a big knot. Here they were, and he and Emily had managed to absolutely ransack the entire sunroom. Feathers and shit were flying all over the place, and all of the sofa and chair cushions were strewn about. Emily and Cliff’s hair both was wild and messy, with feathers sticking out of it. Cliff even had feathers lodged in between his nicotine patches.

“Oh fuck,” was all that he could mutter.

“Happy now?” Lars snapped. “They’ll never let you keep Cecily after they see that you act like a focking child yourself.”

“We can’t let them in this room until we clean this mess up,” said Emily as she began to pick feathers out of her hair.

“Why the hell not?” asked Kirk. “They’ll see what fun Cliff is. Back in Copenhagen, we used to have pillow fights all of the time, and then Cliff would tell me a Misfits story.” He sighed glumly. “That was before Cecily came along and got all of the stories. I’ll never get to see if Evil Uncle Murdock lets them out of the dungeon. ”

Cliff softened, feeling guilty for feeling resentment towards Kirk earlier. “I’m sorry Hamster,” he said. “I forgot that you used to like the Misfits too. I’ll tell you what. If you help me clean this shitty mess up in here, I promise to tell you a Misfits story tonight.”

“Really?” Kirk asked, his eyes dancing like to crystal ballet slippers getting caught in the morning light. “Just like old times?”

Cliff nodded as he began to brush feathers off of his denim blazer. “Just like old time,” he agreed. “It’s the least that I can do for feathering your spiffy denim blazer.”

“Aw thanks Cliff,” said Kirk as he immediately began to get to work on sweeping up the feathers. “You can keep the blazer,” he continued. “You’ve been getting a lot of wear out of it.”

“I don’t want to just come and take your clothes Kirk,” said Cliff. “And it is a little short in the sleeves for me.”

“Yeah,” Kirk returned. “But keep it. It still looks better on you anyway, and it’s the least that I can do to repay you for the Misfits story. I’m so excited.”

Cliff smiled as he grabbed a broom. He was happy that things were still cool between him and Kirk. It just meant one thing: That he and Emily’s relationship would strictly be for pretend, even if Emily ever did change her mind. Cliff wasn’t going to lose his friendship with Kirk over her. Emily was strictly off limits.
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Raedoll
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Poor Twisted Me
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BWARH. Cliff, this should be WAR with you!!!!!! Just because Kirk's your bud doesn't mean you shouldn't try to get the girl that's right for you! ARhhhh!!!! Poor thing. I'm glad that Cliff and Emily get along so well with eachother. But Social Services I hope can see that Cliff is a great parent. He knows when to put his foot down or into his mouth, he knows when to crack the whip and when to give proper slack. <3 I can't wait for more.
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Verity
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The Story Girl
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Y'all get two chapters today. :) I'm still having a good time. Today was a very fine day.
I went up in the Arch in St. Louis. That was a good time. Anyway, I was feeling inspired tonight so here is more.


Chapter 90- Cecily Speaks Her Mind


As Kirk, Cliff and Emily set out to clean up the mess in the sunroom, it was up to James to entertain Social Services. James, with the help of Aunt Josephine of course. Aunt Josephine answered the door, as James stood behind her. Miss Thelma was there, and she brought a very stern looking woman named Elsa. Elsa had salt and pepper black hair pulled back in a very staid looking bun, and was dressed in an all brown suit. She also brought a young chick who had long, straight, bleached blonde hair, blue-green eyes, and extraordinary tits, and a fine, chiseled, (I’m stretching for words here) ass.

“This is Holly,” introduced Thelma. James gawked at Holly as he held out his hand. Holly flashed him a room lighting smile.

You work for Social Services?” he asked astounded that such a nice piece of ass could work for something as mundane as the government.

“I do,” Holly replied. “I just love children, and their welfare is my utmost priority.”

“Yeah,” James sighed. “I love children too. You want one?”

“Someday perhaps,” Holly said as she began to fuck around with her clipboard.

“I could help you with that,” offered James. “Is it alright if I call you Beautiful?”

Holly blushed, and looked down at her trendy little shoes. “I guess if you really want to,” she said. She shyly looked up at James. It was over. James Hetfield had worked his magic on at least one of the Social Services broads.

“I don’t think that hitting on one of us is appropriate,” Elsa scoffed as she frowned at James and Holly. She turned to Thelma. “I told you that Holly was too dumb and immature to handle today’s meeting.”

“Give her half a chance!” Thelma retorted. She turned to Holly. “Holly, why don’t you ask Mr. Hetfield a few questions about his friend Mr. Burton.”

“Uh okay,” Holly blurted out. She blushed at James again.

“Hey Beautiful,” said James as he smiled at her, and made an obscene gesture. Holly giggled. She was totally enchanted by the Het.

“I need to ask you about your friend,” she finally stammered.

“I’m much better in the sack in case you’re wondering,” James replied. “And I’m much better hung. Want a drink?”

“Oh yes,” Aunt Josephine chimed in. “Do come in and have a drink. Welcome to my home.”

“It is a lovely home,” Thelma observed, and scribbled something down on her notepad.

“Humph!” Elsa snorted in disgust. “Lovely my eye! It’s completely ostentatious and ridiculous! Why on earth does one lady, her nephew, and a little girl need all of this space? It’s utterly extravagant if you ask me!”

“She needs all of the space because not only is she housing Cliff and Cecily, but she’s also housing my band,” said James as he fixed Holly a potent rum and coke. “We’re going to hit it big and make lots of money someday. Then I’m going to buy a big house for myself. I want a big house with a hot tub right in my living room and a pool table in my dining room. I’m going to have parties every night, and I want to buy myself a boat and go sailing around the world with just me and five or six chicks.”

“That’s a lofty goal,” Elsa quipped, unimpressed. “Well if you ask me, I think that this house is a bit much. Big screen TVs, in ground swimming pools, saunas! It will only teach the little girl to grow up to be spoiled and rude.”

“So she should stay with her mother in Denmark who can’t even afford to take her to a doctor?” Aunt Josephine shot. “Her mother couldn’t even afford a dentist. I had to take her to her first teeth cleaning.”

“Back in my day, children were given a spoon and a tin can to play with,” Elsa snapped. “We didn’t have newfangled TV sets and stereos. We had love to play with! Love! That’s all that a child needs.”

“I can teach Cecily how to be a fantastic lover,” said James as he winked at Holly, who blushed yet again. James purred.

Just then, Cecily came into the room dressed in her fine purple dress. The Social Service people frightened her, and she found herself hiding behind Aunt Josephine. She buried her face in Aunt Josephine’s skirt.

“Hi there Cecily,” said Miss Thelma. “How’s your new tooth doing?”

“It’s fine,” replied Cecily, smiling shyly at Thelma.

“I need to ask you about Mr. James,” said Thelma. “Is he nice to you?”

Cecily nodded and smiled.

“Oh yes,” she said. “He’s helping me with a school report on Iowa.”

Elsa was glaring at Cecily. Cecily noticed this, and fell shy again. She hid behind Aunt Josephine.

“Come forward!” Elsa barked at her.

Just then, Cliff came into the room. Cecily immediately ran over to him, and threw herself into his arms. She caught him a little off guard since he too was gawking at Holly’s tits.

“I’m afraid Cliff,” Cecily confessed.

“Don’t be Cess,” said Cliff. “I won’t let anyone hurt you.”

“I told you to come forward you silly child!” Elsa ranted again. “Come forward, so that I can get a good look at you.”

“You have to do what the lady says Cecily,” said Cliff as he nudged her forward.

“She frightens me,” Cecily replied clinging to Cliff.

“Go on,” Cliff said and gave Cecily another gentle nudge. Cecily stepped forward, right in front of Elsa.

Elsa frowned at the girl. “That dress is ridiculous!” she snapped. “It’s four-thirty in the afternoon, and she’s dressed as if she’s going dancing!”

“I just wanted to look nice,” Cecily mumbled looking down at her shoes.

“What was that?” Elsa snapped. “Speak up child, and look at me when you speak to me! I can’t hear you when you mumble!”

“Yes Miss,” replied Cecily, as she shyly looked up at the mean, glowering, harsh, woman who loomed over her. “I just wanted to look nice for you,” she repeated.

“Nice?” Elsa snorted. “Well good luck. You certainly not one for looks are you?”

Cecily’s lip began to quiver. She looked near tears.

“Do you agree?” Elsa demanded. Cecily just stood there, fighting ever so hard to hold back her tears. The words “not one for looks” played over and over in her mind.

“Answer me!” Elsa snapped. She walked right over to Cecily and took her chin in her hand. She studied the girl closely. “You’re much too small and thin for your age. Don’t the Burtons feed you?”

“My Mummy told me that I’ve always been small,” said Cecily as the tears began to make their way down her cheeks. “I was even born smaller than most.”

“Humph!” Elsa snorted. “You’re short, scrawny, and your hair is way too long for a young girl. I believe that children should have their hair cropped off short until they’re twelve.” She turned to look at Cliff and James. “But apparently, no one seems to cut their hair around here.”

“Cecily has beautiful, long, hair,” said Josephine. “I wore my hair long as a child, and still do. There’s nothing wrong with it. Clifford always keeps her hair very neatly maintained.”

“Judging by the way that his own hair looks, I’d say that he’s the blind leading the blind,” snapped Elsa. She turned back to Cecily. “And she has freckles! You know what that means? She’s been outdoors too much. Do you go outside often?”

“I go out to ride the horses with Cliff on Saturdays, and sometimes he’ll take me after school if I don’t have much homework,” said Cecily. “He also takes me to baseball games.”

“She should be kept indoors learning how to be a proper young lady,” ranted Elsa. “Not out riding horses and watching baseball! I heard that you have fainting spells, and that your health is fragile. Your scrawny appearance backs that up. You should not be riding horses. No one in their right mind would put you on a horse.”

“Jasmine is an old horse,” said Cliff. “She’s a piece of shit really. Cecily could kick that horse’s ass in a heartbeat. The old nag is harmless.”

“Hold your tongue Mr. Burton!” Elsa cried. She turned to Cecily. “You’re a sickly, skinny, homely, and freckled little girl who would benefit from being kept in a home where you are more protected, and kept indoors, not running about like a ruffian.”

This was just too much for Cecily. Sickly, skinny, homely, and freckled! She burst into tears.

“How dare you call me homely!” she cried. “I can’t help it that I’m small, and that I’m not as pretty as my Mum! I know that I’m too small, and not very pretty, but you didn’t have to rub it in! How would you feel if someone called you ugly? You are ugly! You’re ugly, and mean, and you act like you have sand in your crotch, and I hate you! I hate you! I hate you! I hate you!”

Cecily ran crying out of the room, and up the stairs.

“Why I have never met such a brat in my life!” Elsa gasped. “What a horrid, putrid, ungrateful, child!”

“She’s not the horrid and putrid one!” Cliff snapped as he lost his wit’s end as well. “You are! Who in the nation’s fuck do you think that you are? Coming into my home and picking on a poor, frightened, little girl! What the fuck is the matter with your head calling her shit like homely and scrawny? She has feelings you know! How dare you say such things and hurt her!”

“Yeah,” put in James. “She’s going to grow up to have fine tits and a great ass just like her Mom someday. In ten years time Cecily is going to be prime real estate, let me tell you.”

“And Cecily’s not as fragile as you think!” Cliff went on. “She hasn’t fainted once since coming to live with me! That poor little girl has been through a lot of shit, shit that no little girl should ever have to go through, and she’s very strong because of it.”

“Mr. Burton!” Elsa gasped in horror. “I am disgusted and shocked that you condone this behavior out of the girl. I may have been hard on her, but I am her elder, and I deserve to be treated with respect.”

“Well you haven’t done jack shit to earn any respect,” Cliff quipped. “You fucking just ripped into her. Nobody does that to my little girl! Fuck you! She’s an adorable and beautiful little girl on the outside and on the inside as well. Fuck you! You can go straight to hell! Fuck. Hell isn’t even good enough for you.”

Cliff flipped Elsa off and then went off running upstairs to go comfort Cecily. Elsa was left standing there completely flabbergasted.

“Well,” Thelma said as she cleared her throat. “That was sure um interesting. Shall we meet the girlfriend?”

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MissMetallica;;
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oh.. my..GOD! that was AMAZING! poor cecily! :( that elsa is one mean old bitch. aww i just wanted to give cecily a big hug. and im glad cliff stood up for her. someone had to tell the old hag where to shove it.

i hope they haven't screwed up their chances of keeping cecily. :( cause that would suck big-time! typical james checking out Holly. :lol: ahh his character is so cute and predictable. i love it!

sounds like you're having a great time away. :) travel safe!
cant wait for more
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Shayi
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Bring me that horizon
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My oh my! Two episodes? Now I feel spoilt ;)

Seriously though - the first episode was great, fun, lighthearted (and Kirk filled which makes anything good!) Bless him volunteering to give Cliff his oh so very spiffy blazer! And Cliff had best not forget his Misfits story!

I didn't realise Iowa was quite so exciting either - I'm glad James can enlighten us all! Although I'm not entirely certain how Cecily's teacher would take that report... However, it was great to see Cliff and Emily getting on so, so well!

The second episode was absolutely crazy. I can't believe what that evil bitch from social services said to little Cecily! (but I couldn't help laughing at James hitting on Holly... seriously, can the man keep it in his pants?!). I hope that Thelma sees through that evil cow and doesn't threaten to take Cecily away from Cliff, nothing could be worse!

This story is so awesome, I'm really looking forward to the next bit!
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Simone
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ELSA IS A BITCH!!!! :angry how dare she?? I'd stab her with a dagger! :angry

That old bitch scared Cecily :( awwwww...poor Cecily...but they'll let her because Cliff loves her a lot...and James should stop with the tits and ass,the SS people will think they're all pervs(not that they aren't :lol: )



Another awesome chapter!!! can't wait for moooore...I see everything is well with you Verity :P who are you on tour with? :)
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Verity
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I'm glad that y'all enjoyed the multiple updates. Only one update today though. We had to drive through Arkansas, so I wrote this. Anyway, we're back in a fuck motel again. The lady in front of me even tried to get a room for 1 hour. :lol: And I'm hungry and must go searching for food and liquor. All I've had today is candy corn. :blink:


Chapter 91- Cliff’s Disaster


Cliff could hear Cecily sobbing even through her closed bedroom door. He felt terrible. He couldn’t stand it when she cried. He opened her door just a crack.
“Can I come in?” he asked.
Cecily didn’t even answer. She was much too absorbed with weeping into her pillow. Clif walked over and sat down on the edge of her bed.

“Cecily,” he began as he smoothed out her hair. “That woman is just an old cow. What she says is bullshit.”

“No it’s not,” cried Cecily. “My Mum used to say the same thing. She’s right. I am ugly, and I’m stupid too. I don’t even know where Iowa is.”

“Neither do I really,” Cliff admitted. “I think it’s next to Maine. Anyway, you’re not stupid and you’re not ugly. I say so, and so does James, and trust me, we know a lot about beautiful women.”

“I guess James would,” said Cecily thoughtfully.

“Very funny,” Cliff shot. He took off his spiffy denim blazer and began to wipe Cecily’s teary eyes with it.

“I just hope to be beautiful when I grow up,” Cecily sighed. “I want to be beautiful so that you guys will still like me when I’m older. You might like me now because I’m a little girl, but if I grow up to be ugly, then you guys won’t want me around anymore.”

“Cecily Virginia!” Cliff exclaimed, actually getting her middle name right. “Do you really believe that?”

“Well, you guys never have any ugly chicks around,” Cecily returned.

“There’s nothing wrong with ugly chicks,” said Cliff. “Best sex that I’ve ever had was in Phoenix Arizona with an overweight, pock marked, fifty-two year old, toll booth worker.”

“Really?” Cecily asked, trying to commit the name Phoenix Arizona to memory. She was realizing that she could do her geography lessons by memorizing all of the wonderful, and glorious, places that her Metallica friends had had good and bad sex.

“Yep,” Cliff nodded and sighed dreamily. “Don’t even remember what her name was, but fuck, she was a pleasure goddess. But,” he said as he ran his fingers through Cecily’s hair. “You don’t need to be worrying about that shit for a long time because I told you that you can’t get laid until you’re thirty-six.”

“I’m ugly. I’ll never get laid,” said Cecily glumly.

“Trust me, you will someday,” Cliff reassured her. “You want to know what?”

“What?” asked Cecily. She noticed that one of Cliff’s nicotine patches was peeling off and went to fix it.

“You’re much prettier than your Mom,” said Cliff. “Your Mom does have a nice ass, but you have a much prettier face, and pretty eyes.”

“No way!” Cecily gasped, her eyes lighting up. She had never, ever, been told that before. She had always thought of her mother as the most beautiful woman in the entire world, at least all of Claudia’s boyfriends seemed to think so. She gave Cliff a big hug. “I hope they let me stay with you,” she said. “You always make me feel better.”

“Yeah,” Cliff sighed. “Though I doubt they’re going to let me keep you. Telling the Social Services lady to fuck herself probably wasn’t a good move.”

“Was I wrong to yell at her?” Cecily asked, feeling heartbroken if she had embarrassed or upset Cliff in any way.

“You’re never wrong standing up for yourself, or for something that you believe in,” Cliff replied. “That woman was a fucking bitch. But, she is your elder and you’re going to have to tell her that you’re sorry, even if you don’t really mean it.”

“I’m not sorry in the least,” said Cecily. “But I’ll tell her that I am because I want her to let me stay with you. I miss my Mum, but you actually care about me. She never would take out the time to come and comfort me whenever I’d be off crying over something. But still, I miss her some.”

“Maybe I can get my Aunt to spring for a ticket so that your Mom can come and visit,” Cliff replied. “I really don’t want you going over to Denmark alone. I don’t like the thought of you alone in that hotel room while your Mom gets the shit fucked out of her every night, but maybe she can come over here sometime.”

“You’d let me my Mum come over here?” Cecily asked. “But you hate my Mum. You said that you would never even like her.”

“Yeah,” Cliff admitted. “I don’t like the things that she has said to you. But she is your mother, and I want you to be happy, so if seeing her once in a while makes you happy, I guess that I can tolerate her for a little bit.”

“Thank you so much Cliff,” said Cecily.

“Shall we go back downstairs and try to convince Social Services to let me keep you?” Cliff asked as he stood up and pulled Cecily off of the bed.

“I’m going to do everything that I can,” answered Cecily. “Even if I have to kiss Miss Elsa’s ass.”

***

Emily had been having a rather cordial tea with Thelma, Elsa, Aunt Josephine, and Kirk. James and Holly had mysteriously disappeared off into the other room. No one was sure where they had gone, and what they were up to.

So far, Emily was having an easy time, but Cliff wasn’t around. It was easy to pretend when Cliff wasn’t around. Cliff and Cecily came down the stairs. Emily looked up.

Oh dear, she thought. I knew that it couldn’t stay this easy for long.

“Hello Clifford my darling,” Emily greeted as she got up from the table and threw herself into Cliff’s arms.

“Hey Baby Doll,” Cliff greeted. Emily tried not to cringe at the nickname. For some reason when Cliff said it, it sounded sleazy. Again to Emily’s disdain Cliff took her into his arms and gave her a huge kiss right on her lips. Thelma, Josephine, and Elsa watched wide-eyed as the kiss went on for a few minutes, and then Cliff tried to even use some tongue action, baring no shame in the least. Little Kirk let out a squeak.

Cliff’s hand made its way down to the waistband of Emily’s skirt. He stuffed his hand in between the waistband, and was just about to grab the cheek of Emily’s ass when she pulled away.

“Enough Cliff,” she whispered irritably. Tonguing and ass grabbing was crossing the line. She was absolutely humiliated and embarrassed.

“Those two seem to really um, like each other,” said Thelma as she scribbled notes down onto her pad. “I’ve never seen such a greeting between two people who had just seen each other.”

“Me and Emily,” said Cliff. “There’s a lot of love between us.” He stuffed Emily’s head under his arm and gave it a squeeze, while ruffling her hair.”

“Knock it off,” Emily hissed to him again. “I’m not a dog Cliff. You’re suffocating me.”

Cliff let go of Emily’s head, and followed her over to the tea table. Emily started fixing him a cup of tea.

“There you go Clifford my darling,” she said as she handed him a tea cup and saucer. “Tea with nothing in it, just the way you like it.”

Cliff rolled his eyes. He hated tea, and much preferred coffee. The only way that tea was even halfway drinkable for him was with lots of milk and sugar.

“Thank you Baby Doll,” Cliff said and choked down some of the tea. He knew that she was getting him back for nearly grabbing her ass. Two could play Emily’s game. “Emily, my love,” he said as he leaned back in his chair. “Last night I was headbanging and I got a case of the whiplash. Could you massage my neck for me Baby?”

Emily was ready to die. She looked at little Cecily, who was hopefully gazing up at her. She had no choice really.

“My pleasure,” Emily grunted as she got up and stood behind Cliff’s chair. She started rubbing his neck.

“Yeah baby,” Cliff moaned. Emily began to massage very, very, roughly. She pushed down on his shoulders as hard as she could. She’d get him back. She pushed down really hard with her knuckles, and Cliff let out a yelp of pain. He was about to tell her to watch it, but caught himself.

“You give the best massages Sweetie,” he grunted as he clenched his teeth. He was in agony.

“And you’re the best boyfriend in the world,” Emily returned. This time, she dug her nails deep into the skin on the back of his neck. Cliff squirmed. Aunt Josephine could see that her nephew wasn’t enjoying his massage, and anyone with a half a brain would be able to see it as well.

“Clifford, Emily dear,” she said. “Why don’t you two go out to the kitchen and help Brunhilda bring out the appetizers?”

Cliff, grateful to not have to endure another moment of Emily’s painful massages got up from the table in a heartbeat, managing to bang his knee into it, splashing tea all over himself and Elsa.

“You idiot!” Elsa shrieked. “Watch yourself! You just spilled tea all over me!”

“I’m sorry,” Cliff choked as he rubbed his now throbbing neck. “I didn’t mean to do it on purpose.”

“Humph!” snorted Elsa in disgust. “Maybe you did, between you and that bratty kid of yours.”

“I’ll go fetch you a damp rag and some napkins,” said Emily and she made her way to the kitchen, with Cliff right behind her.

“God damn it!” he cursed as he splashed water on his spiffy tea soaked denim blazer. “I can’t even have one nice article of clothing.”

“Here let me help you,” said Emily as she squirted some dish soap onto her rag, and reached over to dab it on his sleeve. Cliff snapped backward.

“You’re not fucking touching me!” he snarled. “Just what the fuck were you doing in there? Trying to fucking snap my neck off? What kind of a sick fuck are you?”

“You’re the sick fuck!” Emily retorted. “You had no right to tongue me when we kissed, or grab my ass. That was very disrespectful.”

“You’re pretending to be my girlfriend right?” Cliff snapped.

“I don’t know about you, but I’ve never tongued with any of my boyfriends in front of Social Services,” snapped Emily. “But then again, you’re probably only used to cheap, truck stop groupies. Maybe that’s the norm.”

“They don’t have groupies at truck stops,” Cliff muttered as he looked down at his tea soaked sleeve. He started to cry.

“What are you crying for?” Emily snapped harshly. “That massage couldn’t have been that bad.”

“It’s not the massage,” he moaned. “I’m mad that I got tea all over Kirk’s blazer.”

“Cliff, you wear the same sweat and beer stained Misfits shirt almost everyday,” Emily replied as she began to work on cleaning the blazer’s sleeve. “You don’t give a rat’s ass about clothes. Now really,” she said gently. “What’s wrong?”

“This has been just a disaster,” Cliff groaned as the tears came faster. “I’m going to lose Cecily. They’ll never let me keep her!”

Emily sat down next to Cliff and put her arms around him as he cried. She couldn’t argue with him there. They had gotten off to a horrible start with that Elsa woman. “I won’t let them take Cecily away from you,” Emily said, though she knew it was in vain. She had no control over Social Services. “You love Cecily, and she belongs with you. Anybody can see that, I’m sure that Thelma and even Elsa can see it.”

“I’m trying to be good to Cecily,” Cliff balled.

“You are good to Cecily,” said Emily as she passed him a paper towel to blow his nose in. “You’re the best thing that has ever happened to Cecily, and she’s the best thing that has ever happened to you.”

Cliff wiped his eyes and looked at Emily. “No,” he said. “You’re the best thing that has ever happened to me. I’m sorry that I tried to grab your ass earlier. I was just trying to take all that I could, you know? I mean, I can never have you in real life, so I guess I was just trying to get it all in the pretend life.”

Emily sighed. “I just don’ t like having my ass grabbed in public in front of people and a five-year-old child. And you’re right. This is only pretend Cliff. Just pretend. There, you’re blazer is fine now. It just needs to dry off a little.” She gave him a quick kiss on the cheek and then stood up and left the room.

“Wow,” Cliff sighed as he tried to get himself together enough to go back out and face that crabby old Elsa bitch again. “Kirk Hammett is the luckiest man in the entire world…”
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Raedoll
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Poor darlings, both of them. Ms. Elsa is a frigid stone-hearted bitch. Cliff is very gallant and bold for telling Cecily the things he did, and that he'd even tolerate her wretched mother for Her. Anybody with half a brain could see that Cliff loves Cecily more than he can possibly explain. And Kudos to him and Cess for standing up to that obnoxious Elsa cow. Hmph. Elsa needs to pull her head out of her ass. I'm all caught up and I can only say I need to know what happens with social services. Emily's such an amazing sport for putting up with all of Cliff's nonsense, and that peck at the end? Uhoh. That could lead to trouble for Emily's brain and heart.
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MissMetallica;;
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poor cliff. he loves cecily so much and that elsa witch can't just stop being a snobby old cow and realise how much they mean to each other and how much they need each other!!

end rant. :P

ooh james and holly sitting in a room. k-i-s-s-i...actually.. probably more than just kissing going on in there! :lol:
emily was being a sweetheart at the end. but i hope that they will get together soon! AHH.

cant wait for more :D :D
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Simone
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Mistress of Puppets
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Another one!!! yaaaayyyy!!!!! Loved it!!! Why does Elsa need to be such a fag??? <_< I'd spill boiling tea all over her!!! :angry


It's getting from better to amazing! It's like watching a soap opera(the episodes way not other shit they put as soap operas...I hate soap operas but now I can say I love ONE ''soap opera''

YOURS!! :P

:horns: :) :horns2 Trashing continues!
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Raluque
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ooohhh, where to begin?!?!! sorry for not commenting much on your updates, but i've been sick for almost two weeks now.. keeping a clear head while having high fever isn't easy.

i love the updates! everybody's soooo sweet! except for that elsa bitch. funny, smart and deep when it needs to be deep!

hope cliff and emily start understanding that they really are made for each other. they both adore cecily and even if they're so different, opposites attract, right? so what are they waaiting for?...

one more thing, on that elsa... she is a bitch, that's very clear, but i think there's more to her than this face she's showing. acting like that makes cliff and cess react like they normally would, and maybe that's what she wants. maybe she wants them to stick up for neach other, or to see how they interact when they do so. am i making any sense?? this micht be her way of checking if the two really are each other's patch. she might not be the bitch. she might be the one with the most experience in such cases.

i'll stop now :blush:
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Verity
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This chapter gets wild. Hope y'all don't mind.

Simone- This is definitely a soap opera. I guess I seem to gravitate towards writing soap operas. :lol:

Raluque- Hope that you feel better soon. And you make perfect sense!

Kristen- You're right. You've got James and Holly down to a tee. :lol: :lol:

Rae- Elsa is a cow. That's a good name for her.

Now back to the madness...



Chapter 92- Cecily Gets Ordered to Church


Cliff wiped his eyes, took a deep breath, and made his way back out to the parlor. Cecily was just finishing up her apology to Elsa.
“I’m very sorry that I told you that you were ugly and mean,” said Cecily as she smiled at Cliff who entered the room. “Even though those things are true, I shouldn’t have said them, and I’m so so so very sorry. Please don’t blame Cliff. It’s not his fault. Don’t send me away from him, or else I’ll be a fatherless girl again. Could you find it in your heart to please forgive me?”

Elsa sighed, not that impressed by Cecily’s dramatic antics. Someone must have given this child weed at some point, she thought. “I guess I can forgive you,” she said flatly. “But learn how to control your tongue and your temper. Has Mr. Burton had you to church?”

Cliff’s face fell. Cecily looked over at him. There was nothing that Cliff could do to help her. “He makes me say my prayers every night,” Cecily volunteered. “We pray that God will let Ozzy rejoin Black Sabbath, and for the souls of Bon Scott and Randy Rhoads.”

“The child is next door to being the consummate heathen!” Elsa exclaimed. “You’ve never been to church?”

Cecily shook her curly head. “No, and my Mum never took me to church either.”

“Disgraceful,” Elsa muttered as she frowned at Cliff. “Simply disgraceful. You are to start taking this child to church at once.”

“Um okay,” Cliff mumbled.

“Do you go to church?” Elsa barked at him.

“Does playing bass at a church service for fifty bucks on Christmas Eve count?” Cliff asked.

“You both have to start going to church,” Elsa ordered. “There’s a nice little Presbyterian church down the street. I will see to it that you both attend services there.” She turned to Emily. “You are to go as well.”

Emily and Cliff exchanged looks. Going to church together? This would surely start rumors.

Elsa dug into her black bag and pulled out a card. She handed it over to Cecily.

“Can you read?” she asked.

“Oh yes,” Cecily nodded. “I love to read. Cliff helps me with my reading.”

“That’s a wonder,” Elsa snapped. “This card has the Lord’s Prayer printed on it. You are to memorize it by heart by the time that I come back in a week to check up on you.”

“Does this mean that I’m staying with Cliff?” Cecily asked, hope flooding into her face.

“No,” Elsa answered. “I still need to speak with your teacher, and Thelma and Holly and I still need to discuss some things. We also would like to speak with your mother. But, I will give Mr. Burton a week to try and get some religion into your life.”

“Oh surely Cliff will,” said Cecily. “He’ll teach me all about church.”

“And stop calling him Cliff,” Elsa retorted. “I know that you have no respect for elders, but it’s time that you learn some.”

“I told her to call me Cliff,” Cliff defended. “I prefer it over Mr. Cliff.”

Elsa scowled at him and turned back to Cecily. “From now on, you are to address him as Mr. Burton.”

“Could I call him Daddy?” Cecily asked. “I’ve always wanted to be able to call someone Daddy, that has been my grandest wish. I’ve never had anyone to call Daddy before. Please?”

“It’s fine by me,” Thelma answered. “I’m sure that Holly would be okay with it.” She turned to Cliff. “Are you okay with it?”

Cliff gulped. He knew that in the past, he hadn’t been cool with it, but things had changed now, especially since Cecily had come to live with him in San Francisco. Actually, there was nothing else that he wanted more.

“I’d love it,” he said replied. “I would really like that.”

“Well I’m not okay with it,” Elsa retorted. “He’s not your dad.”

“But we could pretend that he is,” said Cecily.

“I don’t believe in pretending,” Elsa snapped.

“Oh Miss Elsa,” sighed Cecily. “You don’t know what you’re missing.”

“Enough of that silly childish gibberish,” said Elsa. “You are to call him Mr. Burton, or else I’m going to send you straight back to Denmark. You are also to memorize that prayer. Understood?”

“Yes Ma’am,” said Cecily nervously.

“Good,” said Elsa. “Now go run along and start memorizing your prayer.”

Cecily nodded. “Thank you for the tea Miss Josephine, Miss Emily, Mr. Kirk,” she turned to Cliff. “And Mr. Burton,” she said awkwardly. She gave Cliff another hug and then ran out of the room taking her new prayer card with her.

Emily fixed Cliff another cup of tea. This time she put lots of milk and sugar into it. It was like a peace offering.

“Thanks,” Cliff said taking the tea, and leaving out any sleazy terms of endearment. He sat down next to her on the couch, and put his arm around her.

“How long have you two been seeing each other?” Thelma asked.

“Five years,” Emily answered.

“And he’s not yet put a ring on your finger?” Elsa asked.

Emily turned red. “We just aren’t ready for that yet,” she said.

“Why not?” Elsa snapped. She eyed Cliff. “You’ve been dating for five years! That’s an appropriate amount of time. When are you planning on making her an honest woman?”

“When the time is right,” Cliff mumbled uncomfortably. He had never been fond of the idea of marriage in general. To him, it had always seemed like a sick, fucked up, government conspiracy.

“Five years isn’t enough time?” Elsa asked.

“Elsa please,” said Thelma. “This is personal.”

“I’m making sure that they have valid reasons for not marrying,” shot Elsa. “Maybe he’s not financially stable enough to support a wife. If he isn’t, he shouldn’t be adopting the little girl. If he can’t even commit to his girlfriend of five years, how in earth can he commit to the chore of raising a child until she’s eighteen?”

“I’m not ready for marriage yet,” Emily blurted out. “It’s not Cliff. Cliff can’t wait to get married. He’s asked me at least four or five times. Isn’t that right?”

“I have,” Cliff agreed. “Shot down each time.”
“Is there a problem with Mr. Burton?” Elsa asked Emily. “Why do you keep saying no?”

“Because, I just don’t feel ready,” Emily stammered.

“Well then Mr. Burton must not be right for you,” said Elsa. “You should move on to someone else. You’re much too good for him anyway. I just feel bad for the little girl though. She’ll grow attached to you, only to have you leave.”

Elsa began to scribble furiously in her notepad while shaking her head. “There’s actually a very nice family who lives out in Arkansas who has been wanting a little girl,” Elsa prattled on. “I know that they wanted to adopt one younger than Cecily, but they might be willing to take her. They’re a nice, married, stable, and most of all Christian family.”

“But I said that I would take Cecily to church!” Cliff exclaimed feeling threatened.

“Yes, but Cecily needs stability,” said Elsa. “You’re not a very stable person. You don’t even have a real job. Playing in a rock band in deed! That’s kid’s stuff, not a job!”

“But we’re Metallica!” Cliff cried, as if that was going to help anything.

“Cecily needs two parents,” said Elsa sternly. “Not a broke, hippie, father with a revolving door of girlfriends who leeches off of his aunt.”

The words stung Cliff. They really hurt. He was even more hurt than the time that Lars had suggested they kick Cliff out of the band because he didn’t dress sexily enough. He had never been so offended in his entire life.

“I think that Cecily will flourish living in Arkansas with this other family,” Elsa said.

Without giving it another thought, Cliff went down on one knee in front of where Emily was sitting.

“Cliff, what are you doing?” Emily asked, starting to panic a little.

“Emily,” Cliff began as he slid off his skull ring and held it up to Emily. “I know that I keep asking you, and you keep turning me down, but would you please, please, please, marry me?”

“Jesus Clifford!” Aunt Josephine shrieked, earning a frown from Elsa.

Emily wasn’t sure what to say. She could see Elsa just glaring at her out of the corner of her eye. “Yes Cliff. I will.”

Cliff slid the skull ring on Emily’s ring finger on her right hand. He had the right finger, but wrong hand.

“Wow!” Kirk exclaimed. “There’s going to be a wedding! Oh do let me plan it! Please? I love weddings.”

“Congratulations,” said Thelma warmly as she jumped up to hug the new couple.

“You’re mother is going to be thrilled,” Aunt Josephine said as she gave Cliff a smirk.

Elsa was still frowning, which was nothing unusual. “A skull ring?” she balked. “That’s romantic.”

“I love skulls,” said Emily as she admired the ring. The ring was much too big for Emily. You could practically drive a truck through the space that was between the ring band and her finger.

“We’ll have to get it resized,” said Cliff.

“Have you two set a date?” Thelma asked. “Sooner would probably be better than later for Cecily’s sake.”

“Oh I don’t know,” sighed Emily. “Perhaps in the spring. There’s no rush. Maybe we could have the ceremony in my native home of England.”

“Yeah, that would be hot,” said Cliff. “Then Black Sabbath could play the reception.”

“If you plan on getting married in England, that will be a long time,” Elsa scoffed. “I don’t trust you two anyway.” She turned to Cliff. “I’m sorry Mr. Burton, but I simply don’t like you. I don’t see you marrying a girl as polite and cordial as Emily.”

“Why the hell not?” Cliff demanded. “I’m polite. I even use my napkin now.”

“He does,” Aunt Josephine vouched.

“I just prefer to see you two marry sooner,” Elsa said with a shrug. “Take it or leave it.”

“But my family is all in England,” said Emily. “There’s no way that we could plan a wedding in England without it taking a fair amount of time. I plan on staying with Clifford forever.” She linked her arm with his. “This will be my only wedding, and I want it to be perfect.”

“You could have a small ceremony over here,” Kirk volunteered. “And then a bigger ceremony in England later.”

“I guess,” Cliff replied as he looked down at his shoes. How the fuck were they going to get out of this mess?

“That does sound like a better idea,” agreed Elsa and even Thelma.

“Then it’s settled then,” said Kirk as he began to dance around.

“Can’t we wait until after the album is finished?” Cliff asked, starting to feel a little sick. He would rather be tarred, feathered, and disemboweled than married. “I’m not going to have the time to run around with wedding plans and shit,” he moaned.

“You just leave the wedding planning to me,” Kirk said as he gave his friend a pat on the back. “We can have the ceremony here at your Aunt’s villa. The gardens here would be the most beautiful place for a ceremony and reception.”

“Oh yes,” Aunt Josephine agreed. “You must have it here.”

“Can’t we just have a shot gun wedding in Vegas?” Cliff asked. “We can do the big ceremony with all of the bullshit later in England.”

“Your mother is going to want you and Emily to have a beautiful ceremony,” Josephine whined. “This is the first marriage for both of you. Plus, she owes me fifty bucks. She bet me that you would never marry.”

“Don’t you worry Cliff,” said Kirk as he once again congratulated the couple. “Leave all the details to me. I’ll choose and send out the invitations, pick the caterer, the entertainment, the flowers, the cake, the favors. All you’ll have to do is show up.”

Ha ha, Cliff thought. The one thing that I won’t be doing, because it’s all pretend. I better remind Kirk so he doesn’t go out and buy a bunch of wedding shit.

“Well,” Elsa scoffed as she stood up to leave. “At least he is making her an honest woman. You need to settle down if I’m going to let Cecily stay with you, and just for the record, I still don’t like you.” She turned to Thelma. “Now where’s Holly? That tit has been nothing but worthless.”

“Trust me,” said James as he came back into the room, his neatly combed hair was now all askew, and his jeans were unbuttoned. “Holly ain’t worthless.”

“Cliff and Emily are getting married!” Kirk chirped as he began bouncing around. “They’re getting married here at the villa! Let’s have the ceremony this coming Saturday!”
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Raluque
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OMGOMGOMGOMGOMG!!!!!!!!! yes!!! this was bound to happen! they need to finally realize that they need to be together, not just for cess. OMGGG!!!! kirk as the wedding planner :lol: i still believe that elsa is kinda testing them to see how far they would go to keep cecily.

:heart: mooooooooooooooooooooooore!!!!


thank you :blush:
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Raedoll
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OHMAHGOD. What the hell?!?!?! What if Emily really DOES end up wanting to Marry Cliff?! BLWAHRH. AHHH. I feel like I just got punched when I read that update (and yes, I have been punched and it hurts ><. Especially from a trained martial artist). I don't know what to say. I really have no fucking clue. AWH. THere it is! haha, AWH!!!! Damn Cliff's Behemoth hands. I mean DAMN THEM. But then again No because that buys them time! Ahhhhh what happens if Cliff doesn't show up and Social Services takes Cecily away from him?!@ Cliff use your HEAD. You could REALLY be married to Emily for awhile! You're passing up a HUGE OPPROTUNITY! It'd be Cecily's dream come true! ;_; I just hope things don't get ruined....
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Verity
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Thanks you two. :dance

I will try and update soon but tomorrow I have a LONG ASS drive to Virginia Beach. It's for a good cause though. We're playing a concert on a big music fesitval there. Very excited indeed.
Anyway, I can write in the car until my piece of shit laptop battery dies.

But I should come up with more soon. :dance
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