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| Her Name Was Ellie | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: January 1, 2013, 6:44 pm (2,184 Views) | |
| Sol | January 5, 2013, 2:06 pm Post #16 |
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Frantic
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The more I spend time here, the more I feel that I need to tell you thank you all. ![]() Thanks for every single post. I was just so happy reading them. Anyways, sorry for the mistakes. ( I tried my best not to make one in this chapter but you may see some. ) ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Chapter Four September 30th, 1987. San Francisco. Lying on her bed, eyes wide open, Deanna's mood was foul. She used to really appreciate the bass player's company. Usually, he used to spend a lot of time with her, just watching Ellie sleeping, talking about silly things. Now, she was picturing James, barely walking on the street, seeking for an unteenth open bar. It was 6:00 am and he had spent most of the night outside with Metallica other members, swallowing his pride and sorrow with alcohol. She knew her brother well enough to see that he was back to his self-alcoholic mode. In fact she was understanding him. It was because of their mother's death, because of their father leaving their house without looking back at them, because of Lily, that pretty and selfish girl that had changed his world and then left him as well, because of Cliff's accident. This last fact was questioning everything, the band he had created, the living he was living. And James never liked remembering. It was making him suffering and he was hiding his true feelings behind drugs and alcohol. Deanna sighed, getting up of the bed. During a couple of seconds, her legs were numb but it quickly stopped as she made her way downstairs, her footstep as quiet as she could. Fortunately, Ellie was sleeping, her head full of beautiful dreams, not a worry in mind. But all in hers. In the kitchen, she took a chocolate bar in her brother's pack, managed to watch tv until he came home, laughing at everything she would say, giving her crazy explanations about him being so late, then sleeping fully clothed on a chair. Every time James was drunk, he was doing this, except when he had met a girl. And, while he was not busy touring, he usually was woken up by his daughter who did not understand why he was not there to sing her a lullaby before she had to go to bed. Deanna jerked when she heard soft knocks on the front door. She already knew that her brother was not able to find his keys and went to open. She faced three drunk boys, laughing about things that she did not want to guess about. She felt anger pounding in her veins. Why should she live like a housewife when she was only nineteen? She had a life too. But, James did not care about her at all. And they both knew it. " Can we come in? " Lars asked, his voice really strange, but she stood still " No. " " Why?" James inquired, giggling " I want you all to think about me, about Ellie, about the questions she asked. Think twice because I won't tolerate any lie. Where the hell have you been all the night? I was worried and she was too. I know Cliff is not here anymore but it is not an occasion to ruin yourself and ourselves, by the way! And I'm not her mother, James. Sometimes I, too, want to have fun without worrying about her or anything. " " But..." James mumbled but his sister cut him in, looking madly at him " You don't understand, James. You are destroying your career hanging out and getting drunk or whatever every night. It's not healthy, for anyone. Just think about that because I'm fed up! " *** September 31st, 1987. San Francisco. Sitting at the kitchen table, eyes lost in his confused thoughts, James' mood was angry. He was attempting to forget his sister's words but that was useless, they kept repeating without interruption in his painful head. His members, his legs and his arms, seemed heavier than usually when he decided to take the glass of water in front of him. On the oven's door, he read the time : 9:00 am, and he hadn't sleep since two days. He was exhausted, in every possible ways, mentally and physically. He remembered when he used to say that he would rather regret doing something than not doing something. That was it. He was regretting his past acts, how he had reacted while he figured out his mother's death, how he had treated Lily, how he was so powerless when Cliff had died. He wished he also would not had been such an idiot with Deanna. She was almost raising his child and all he was doing was being selfish, focused on his only needs. " Daddy, where is Cliff? " Ellie's voice echoed loudly into his ears and he jerked, turning around to face the cute little girl in her pink pajamas. The couple of times he had been sober, he had thought about how he would present Cliff's death to his daughter. He really did not want to hurt her. But, now, something in his heart broke into a million pieces and he had to drink a little more water to breath, hardly. Ellie was still waiting, in the opening of the kitchen door, staring at every single of his movements. " Ellie, please, why can't you go watch the tv, please? " " But, Kirk and L..." she started but was quickly cut in by a really dry James " Ellie, please! " " Did he leave your band, Dada? " " No, Ellie, now go away! " The little blond girl frowned, then did was she was told, her twinkling blue eyes turning into a sad pale color as she walked away to the living room. James sighed, hiding his face with his hands. His world was crumbling around him. He was not even able to know how to speak to his daughter. He had dared to yell at her, well aware of her reaction. She was just a child. *** October 1st, 1987. San Francisco. " I don't want her to be like me." James said, leaning over Ellie's cradle, watching her sleep. " I mean, I want her to be happy and not to go through that anymore." " Yeah. Sure. " Lars asserted, following suit " She cried so much, you know, when Deanna told her. I felt horrible because he meant a lot for her too and I wasn't realising this yet. " " Hopefully, she's just a little kid. She'll forget about that soon. " " Yes... " " Well... We all, one day, forget or at least forgive him for passing away. Metallica won't be the same now." James nodded, agreeing silently with his friend. Deanna was right : he should get a grip on himself. Making music was the best way to move on. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Again, thanks a lot and I hope you'll enjoy this! |
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| Powerslave | January 5, 2013, 2:22 pm Post #17 |
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Bad Seed
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I really enjoyed this chapter! Poor Ellie though, and James needs to get a hold of himself Thank you for posting
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| CarpeDiemBaby | January 5, 2013, 4:37 pm Post #18 |
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// Sunglasses indoors.
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Ow, poor James. ;_; Dealing with Cliff's death in a sad way. Great chapter!
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| Zira | January 5, 2013, 11:48 pm Post #19 |
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Frantic
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PoorJames, going out and getting drunk, only to leave Ellie alone with Deanne. Love it |
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| Sol | January 6, 2013, 10:28 am Post #20 |
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Frantic
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Oh my god! It's official, I love you all! Thanks for all the comments you post. It makes me want to scream each time I read one! ![]() As always, sorry if I made mistakes. Hope you'll enjoy this one just as much as I enjoyed writting it. ![]() ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Chapter Five December 3rd , 1987. San Francisco. " Man, you did invite Lily to your wedding!" James croacked, looking at the mirror in front of him He was trying to tie his necktie up. In vain. His hands were so shaking that, each time, he failed. He was litteraly panicking like never before. Why should everything be related to Lily? He knew Kirk was one of his ex-girlfriend's friends but was not expecting the guitar player to betray him that way. Even though Ellie would not go to the party, he would have to see her mother once more and, as their last meeting turned out to be a total disaster, was anxious. Lily was such a complicated girl. " Man... Rebecca wanted her to be part of the ceremony, I couldn't say ' no ', could I? " The curly haired boy said as he turned to help James out " Yeah... Whatever. " " She won't be here the whole night, don't worry. " " Kirk! " Lars shouted so that they could hear from the bathroom in the spite of the door that was separating them. " In an hour, you'll be married, you don't wanna miss that, do you? " " We're coming! " " I just wanna warn you I won't talk to her or do anything that she's about. " James whispered before swunging the door open " I don't have to, man. It supposed to be cool. Just relax. " They both nodded, smiled at each other as Lars was offering them some beers. Because the singer had lived in a crazy house during his childhood, almost like an orphan, and had to deal with this since he was sixteen, Metallica was the thing he was the proudest of, except his daughter. With his band, he succeeded building his own family and, if Kirk had said that, there was nothing he could fear. *** James was taking his unteenth beer at the bar when someone made him turn around by touching his shoulder. He immediately knew it was Lily. He had recognized her long fingers on him, her sweet perfume. His heart jumped up to his chest but he forced himself to look at her. She was wearing a short black dress despite the cold weather and had put make-up on her eyes, which was standing out their color. More than usual, he could tell she was gorgeous. She glanced away from his gaze and shyly cleared her throat. " Hi... Look, I'm sorry about what happened last time. I didn't mean to..." " It's okay. " The young man snapped back " Anyway, I got something to give you. It's about Ellie. " Lily went on, as she took from her handbag a small folder. " I did this for you. " " What is it? " " I... I made administrative procedures a-and now, Ellie is officially all yours. After your fight with Dave... Oh god, this is so hard... I spied on you with her, and I've to say that you seem to be a great father. " James was flabbergasted. He wasn't expecting the conversation to be so quiet. At all. He would have thought that he was going to yell at her and to spend the night drinking and smoking to forget her words. But, he was wrong. Replacing a strand of hair that was going into his eyes, he grabbed what she was offering him. He would not have ever imagine that some sheets of paper would have this effect on him. He couldn't help but grinned at her. " Thanks. " he mumbled Then, she walked away. *** December 25th, 1987. San Francisco. " James, why can't you open the door? " Deanna shouted from the kitchen " I'm busy! " He replied, sitting on the sofa, a broad grin on his face He couldn't take his eyes off his baby girl. Drank a few gulps of his beer. How could he have done such a beauty, a little all blond doll? Ellie was playing with her christmas presents, trying to put together several pieces of a puzzle. She was getting on her own nerves since she had not find out how to match them and he laughed. His look suddenly went on the teenager that was running into the room, cursing him for being such an idiot as soft knocks were heard on the front door. Once more. Deanna swung it open. " Oh god... James, someone wants to talk to you! " She said, slamming the door in the stranger's face Deanna quickly made her way towards the kitchen, letting her perplexed brother in the living-room. Was she crazy or something? James got up as fast as he could, warned Ellie he would not be long, walked to the door. " Hi, James. " a familiar voice echoed to his ears as soon as he had opened it Lily. She was facing him with her green eyes, smiling, and he suddenly became serious, straightening up a bit and running his hands in his messy hair to get it done. Her grin immediately faded away and she bit her lower lip, confused, but her eyes kept staring at him. " Why are you here? " James asked, barely trembling " I... Can I just see her? Please! " " Lily... " " I promise I..." " Don't say something you don't think. " the fair-haired young man cut her in " Can I see my daughter, please, James? " Lily begged Why did she always have to make him feel guilty for something he hadn't done yet? Their eyes still meeting, he slowly opened the door so that she could enter. " You got two minutes. She doesn't even know who you are. " He whispered into her ears as they stepped into the house " That's fine. I just wanna hear her voice and see how she really is, now. " They nodded. " Who is it, dada? " Ellie said, dropping her toys on the ground as she saw the two young people moving forward towards her. " It's... hum... a friend of mine, sweetheart. She's gonna be here for a short while. " James answered as they sat on the sofa He quickly glanced at Lily. She seemed fascinated by the little girl, her eyes going up and down to remember every inch of the child. It would be harsh for her but it was her choice after all. He wasn't to blame. Moreover, how couldn't she gaze at their cute baby? Ellie looked like a dream. Words could not describe what he was truly feeling looking at his daughter. She was wearing red pajamas, wich was her favorite outfit since he had bought, two weeks ago. Deanna had brushed her hair that was falling on her small shoulders and her blue eyes were looking at them as if they were really strange, a tiny frown on her forehead. " Is she your girlfriend, dada? " she inquired, taking them by surprise What was he supposed to say, now? James cursed himself for letting his ex-girlfriend come in and his sister raising his child while he was touring because he knew that she was the one to blame for this : she did not like any of his girlfriends and Lily was not an exception. Ellie was nearly four! He felt embarrassed but nothing on his face enabled somebody to say so. " No! " He almost shouted " Is she my mom, then? " ' Oh fuck...' was all he was thinking about. He felt trapped like never before. Was he supposed to say the truth or to lie? During a few seconds, he wished she was not able to speak anymore. " El... " He started But Lily cut him in, flipping her hair over her shoulders. " Yes, I am, Ellie. " she shyly murmured. " We already met before but you were not as tall as now. " " I owe daddy that! He is just so tall! " the cutie chucked, not realising the young woman words'impact Lily slowly laughed and James barely sighed in relief, relaxing on the sofa. She had not really focused on Lily's speech, playing with her toys again, as if nothing had happened. She was just too young to understand what all of this meant and James was thankful for this " I told you she was just like a mini-you! " Lily whispered into his ears " Yeah... " he hardly breathed " Just one last thing, James. Don't let anything tears you both apart, please. " --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Thanks a lot! |
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| CarpeDiemBaby | January 6, 2013, 5:41 pm Post #21 |
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// Sunglasses indoors.
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Aw, such a cute chapter. I wonder if Lily is planning something... I don't know, I don't like that girl at all. More!
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| Powerslave | January 7, 2013, 1:23 pm Post #22 |
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Bad Seed
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Gotta bad feeling bout Lily... Loved the chapter as always more!
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| Sol | January 8, 2013, 7:04 am Post #23 |
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Frantic
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Thanks everyone! This is going to be the end of the first part. ![]() Hope you'll enjoy this one! ------------------------------------------------------------- Chapter Six " Do you wanna come with me to a pub? " " I've to watch on Ellie..." James claimed, suddenly ill-at-ease in front of his ex-girlfriend When the hell did she start thinking that he was actually friend with her? Closing the front door of the house, he put his hands in his jeans' pockets, freezing at the cold wind. The night was there for a while now and maybe some drinks would relax him. " Come on, I promise it won't be long. Plus your sister's with her and I'll pay! " " Alright, then. " " I know a really quiet place really near, it's gonna be funny and you won't be bothered by people asking you autographs!" Lily exclaimed, grinning at him, her deep green eyes watching him as if he were the most incredible creature of the whole world. What was wrong with him, now? He was really about to hang out with the girl that forsook her family, her own daughter, wasn't he? It seemed that she came right on cue because he didn't care that much. He was young and free. If he wanted to spend time with his ex, who could tell him not to? *** " Oh James..." Lily purred as the blond gently pushed her against the toilets'door Almost in the darkness, things looked like dancing around her. Her legs nearly gave way under her so he had to hold her closer to him. The desert hallway allowed her to wrap them around James' waist, that was grinning. They were so drunk... She moaned as she felt his hands on her skin, stroking her body with his delicate touch. He was driving her insane and he knew it, playing with it. She kissed him. A soft and mind-blowing kiss he wasn't expecting. She ran a hand in his hair while he was holding her body up to be at the perfect height. Again, she kissed him, silently telling him that she wanted more. And he obeyed, like a fool. Even though he knew that wasn't right, at all. *** December 26th, 1987. San Francisco. " Yesterday was a mistake, a total mistake. Everything was wrong. You came back, I lost control of the situation. We were drunk. Nothing more. As you said, we don't love each other anymore... And... Oh I don't know why I'm leaving you this damn message! Nothing coming from you worthes it. This's non-sense. I tell you, Lily, even if you saw her once and I didn't start arguing with you, this doesn't mean we're back together. Of course not! You were so naïve thinking I was like that. You don't even know me, Ellie neither! You're holier-than-thou! Just admit that you were only with me because of my name. " James' voice echoed into Lily's answering machine, making her cry. She reached a hand to the table, grabbed her pack of cigarettes. During several minutes, she smoked between her sobs. She felt foul, ashamed of her and of her acts. She could not believe her ex-boyfriend's words. Usually, she used to blame boys not for acting the way she wanted them to. She used to do this with Dave Mustaine's brother and that was why their relationship did not last long. She got married at eighteen and divorced one year later. And, that was the time when James was the one with whom she could find comfort. She used to know how he was dealing with his issues and she helped him out. But, they met in the wrong time, at the wrong place. Both needed attention and love, both had strong minds. Nevertheless,it was cool for her to be with a 'rockstar'. But everything went wrong and became useless. That was all. The clock seemed locked on 9:00am and Lily secretly promised herself not to fetch her daughter nor James anymore. *** August 15th , 1989. Between Los Angeles and San Francisco. " How are you, honey? " James inquired, looking at the landscape that was flashing across his eyes Sitting in the tour bus, he was quite nostalgic, thinking of his daughter growing so fast without him being around. That was torture. " I'm sad, daddy. " " Why? " " I miss you and... I want to be with you. " " Ellie, we've already talked about that. My job's to make music and to tour. Yours is to be at home, with uncle David and auntie Deanna, and to study at school. " James said, really serious, but his heart looked like bleeding within. Touring while his baby girl was at home seemed harder now that Ellie was big enough to express her feelings. James wished she still was a baby so that he had not have to say these words to her. But, unfortunately, he couldn't go back to that time. Even if he had prayed for it. That would had been useless. Ellie was there, on the phone, breathing in and out at a regular pace, remaining silent. As he focused on her, he figured out that she was crying. " I don't wanna be with auntie Deanna and uncle David, daddy. I wanna be with you and Kirk and Lars and Jason. " She insisted, her little voice broken with sobs. He sighed, thinking of a plausible solution. Ran a hand in his hair, lost in his thoughts. " Can I come with you all, dada? " " Ellie..." " Please! I promise I'll be nice! " Trapped, just like that. This girl was making him so weak sometimes! " I... You promised? " " Yes! Please, daddy! I want to play with your instruments. " That was official now. She was making him so weak all the time. " Yeah, honey. You won. " he gave up, yet smiling He couldn't say no because that was all he was hoping. To spend time with her. Even though, he should be careful with the medias. She should to be hidden from the press, the cameramen or anything else and, he would definitely make sure everything that right at this point. " But I've got to tell you that it's the first and last time for this to happen, do you understand? " he went on, rather dryly " Yes, I do. " " Aright, then. I'll call your aunt to tell her. " As James hung up the phone, he found three heads foolishly grinning at him. " What? " he almost shouted He had no answer, just laughters echoing into his ears. And he knew the reason why. They couldn't look forward to see his daughter again. He followed suit, laughing. FLASH-BACK July 26th , 1986. San Francisco James used to love skateboarding. When he was not attempting to catch himself from falling with his wrists. Oh god, he couldn't even hold his daughter now. Even the Metallica manager had told him to be careful while doing this. " If you break your leg or anything else, you still shall play, you know that? " the man had warned him. But he just had burst into laughter. Doing some tricks before a concert was not his best idea. At all. He was exhausted, laying on his bed, his hair still wet from the last concert they had given earlier, his cast itching him, his eyes looking at the ceiling. Ellie was sleeping in the another bedroom with Deanna since, because of his injury, he couldn't be with her. He heard shoutings and music coming from downstairs. Closed his eyes, trying to fall asleep. In vain. The door swung open and Kirk appeared. He slowly sat up on his bed as the guitar player followed suit. " Man, why don't you go downstairs with us? " " I don't know. " " C'mon! There're beers and lots of other things you need to try! Don't be so reasonnable! " His friend was right. He used to be the first one who wanted to party, the one to be drinking too much and messing thing up. But the difference was there : he used to. Oh god, what happened to him? It seemed like the old James was him on stage and the new James was him at home. " Yeah, I'll come. " He said, grinning at the curly-haired young man " Alright! ” He laughed as he got up. They left the room. " Cliff 's something to give you, James. " Kirk went on, as they were reaching the staircase. " It's from Lily. She gave him a card for Ellie. ” " Are you kiddin' me? " James exclaimed " No! Apparently, she wants you to be happy with your little cutie and she still loves you! " " What a fucking joke! " END OF THE FLASH-BACK --------------------------------- As always, sorry for the mistakes. |
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| CarpeDiemBaby | January 8, 2013, 4:01 pm Post #24 |
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// Sunglasses indoors.
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Cool chapter! James always so tender and sweet with Ellie More!
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| Powerslave | January 8, 2013, 5:47 pm Post #25 |
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Bad Seed
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I really liked the flash back! loved the chapter, more!
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| Verde Manzanita | January 8, 2013, 9:50 pm Post #26 |
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I have no feelings in my soul, where most have passion I got a hole
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Lily... ok, I officially don't like Lily. I don't trust her, call it intuition, but I am expecting her to do something really stupid. Talking about stupid stuff, sleeping with her was definitely a bad stupid idea, James, and you know it, but well, it's done now and you can't help it. Ellie is still a cutie
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| Zira | January 8, 2013, 11:53 pm Post #27 |
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Frantic
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Oh, James, you are such a naughty boy, sleeping with your evil ex-girlfriend. Will it come back and bite him on the ass? Loved it, Ellie is so cute. |
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| Sol | January 9, 2013, 6:35 am Post #28 |
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Frantic
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Wow! I wasn't expecting all these comments! Just great! As you all noticed, Lily may be back in the next chapters... ![]() This one is the first of the second part, so be careful with the dates. You'll probably be surprised by how things are going. Anyways, sorry if I did make mistakes ( I think my English is improving but we never know ) ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Chapter Seven July 14th, 2001. San Francisco. This couldn't be real, couldn't be happening. Not now. Not like that. How could she have been so careless and immature? It was a mad nightmare, for sure. Ellie closed her eyes, focusing on her uneven breath. She was so stupid, she couldn't be eighteen alrealdy. She felt like a scared little girl lost in a desert without anyone to bring her home. She slowly opened her eyes, her vision suddenly focusing on the teenager that was looking at her in the mirror she was facing, letting the tears she was holding back run down on her cheeks. She could not recognized herself. Her long blond hair was still wet from the shower she had just taken, falling in her back. She looked drawn even though her delicate features were harmonizing her picture. She turned her head, avoiding her own reflection. She did not want to see the sorrow in her pale eyes. She sat on the ground, her back against the bathroom wall, her legs neatly folded against her chest, hoping that she would awaken a few minutes later in her bed. In her warm bed. That was all she was craving for. But a cold tiled floor beneath her was her only respond, apart her sobs. Ellie glanced at the small window, it was nearly time for diner. A knock on the locked door startled her out of her thoughts. " Ellie, can you please hurry up? Cali and Castor need to wash before the meal. " James' familiar voice echoed through the door. Her heart started pounding loudly in her chest and she had a lump in her throat. She truly wanted to run away from here. To live in another country. Far away from the reality. " I don't want to. " she mumbled, sniffing " Honey, what's happening? " " I... I just want Fran'! " she wailed " Oh... Okay. " She waited half a minute, holding her breath, just to make sure he was really calling his wife. Heartbroken teenage girls was something he knew nothing about and he probably felt it was time to throw in the towel. She heard his footsteps making their way down to the kitchen and slowly relaxed, yet her hands still shaking. How would he react? She already could imagine him yelling at her, angry as he had never been. Then, the front door slamming and him with his hunting gun walking on the driveway. Oh god, that thought was frightening her! " Ellie, are you okay? " Francesca asked, softly from the other side of the door, already there Ellie got up and swung open the door, facing her worried step-mother, still wearing her cooking apron. " Y... Yes. " she said slowly " What's wrong? " " I... I made a mistake. A terrible one." " Oh, god. " Francesca chucked, as the girl led her to the bathroom, taking time to lock the door up behind them. *** " What's happening? " Cali, James' youngest daughter, inquired without taking her eyes off her drawing " I dunno, sweatheart. I guess Ellie has a girly issue. " " Oh. Alright. When will she and mom come downstairs? " " Soon. " He asserted, kissing the little girl's forehead and she grinned at him *** " Pregnant. " Ellie looked down her bare feet, nervously blushing. She was ashamed. Ashamed since she secretely went to the doctor's while her father was touring to be sure. Ashamed since she did not inform Francesca earlier. Perhaps she could have given her advices. Ashamed since she used to be completely drunk when it was happening. Francesca remained silent a second, seeking what she could say, lost in her own thoughts. " Please, say something. " Ellie begged, starting weeping again. " Anything. " " I... Are you sure? " Her step-mother's voice became so low she barely heard her She nodded, not knowing what else to do. " Have you planned something? " " It's too late, Fran'. " " Okay... Oh god... What the hell happened? " " Do you remember when dad and you went on holidays with Cali and Castor? " " You did invite a boy to our house, didn't you? " " Not really... " " What do you mean, 'not really' ? " Ellie breathed out slowly, bracing herself for that moment. The one she was fearing the most since she learnt her pregnancy. It was harder while two eyes were staring at her. A lot harder. She threatened to let out a small sob but countained herself. She was the one to blame for being in this situation. " I slept with Lars. Several times. " the teenage croaked as fast as she could, her heart burning in her chest *** Francesca silently slipped into the bed. For the first time ever since she had met James she awkwardly was anxious. She had dealt with her husband's cheatings, his alcoholism, his anger and their children. She had thought she would be able to bear anything now. She wasn't really right. An understatement. Her step-daughter expecting her husband best friend's baby had never passed through her mind. " What was wrong with Ellie? " " She was upset. " " About what, Fran'? " " About us. She's scared of you and me breaking off. " " She loves you too much! " James chucked, joking " She's like my daughter, you know. " " Yeah... " A silence took over, filling every inch of their bedroom. The light was off, the only way they could see each other was the window letting the stars' light penetrate within the room. Francesca rolled her arms around her husband. Some months ago, he was in rehab and the whole family had to go through a tough time. Maybe that was the reason for all of Ellie's misbehavings. " Thanks for being there for her too. " he said, his voice huskier than usual " You're welcome, babe, but I need to tell you something else. Just promise me you won't be mad and stay in bed, okay? " *** July 16th , 2001. San Francisco. James was sitting on the sofa, dialing without interruption numbers on his cell-phone, writing on a sheet of paper notes, his glasses almost falling off his nose. But he wasn't listenning. At all. His mind was as busy as his hands. And he had to keep it that way. Otherwise, he would be shouting at everyone. This was a bad nightmare. His daughter, pregnant. His baby girl having a baby. When the hell did she start liking boys? Where were the dolls, the teddy bears and the pink pajamas? When did all that go? She was already eighteen but it seemed like yesterday he was holding her tiny body against him, introducing her to his close friends, Metallica members. Things had changed so much. When he had had Ellie, he was not twenty yet, focusing on booze, girls and music. He did not want her to be just like him, living the same things he had to go through, attempting to be two different people at a time. A young talented musician searching for his limits and an experimenting father. That used to be a crazy life. Ironically, he would had regret not living this kind of life rather than not doing something. Since it enabled him to be who he was today. Oh god, he was seeking excuses to her pregnancy! " Honey, we're home! " Francesca chirped, opening the front door, making him almost jerk. He quickly glanced at her, silently telling her to be quiet so he could hear what Kirk was saying about their upcoming tour. She did as she was told, carrying the groceries she just made into the kitchen. While two little blond children moved forward in his direction, James hung up the phone and sat them next to him on the sofa. " Shooping with mommy was good? " James asked his one-year-old son, Castor, and the little boy nodded his nead, looking at him with seriousness. " Great, then. What do you all wanna do? " " Ellie's waiting for you near the swing! " His wife said, with a powerful voice, from the kitchen. " She wants to talk to you! " " Alright... " James swallowed with difficulty, looked at his children, all smiling and sweet. Got up, made his way out of the house and found Ellie in the yard. She had turned her head to see him and slowly grinned at him. Everyone was always saying that she was her father's look-a-like but, at this instant, she seemed to be the spitting image of her mother. Just gorgeous. Her blue eyes glanced away from his gaze. She was there, suddenly looking at the sky, her hair waving with the hot summer wind. He knew it was hard for her too since her fingers had become entangled, a habit she had when she was really nervous. James braced himself, once he was next to her, looking at the sky as well. He grabbed a pack of cigarettes from his jeans and smoked one of them, his eyes staring at the small plane, so far away from both of them. His mood was foul. He could not imagine his baby girl with a man. " What happened, Ellie? " he said, his voice strangely calm " I'm so sorry, dad. I really am. " she asserted, her words broken with sobs She was crying, could not countain herself. It was too much for her to handle. James stood still, he didn't want to feel any compassion for his daughter. " I... I promise I'll try my best not to yell at you. " yet he explained, really uncomfortable " Thanks. " A short silence took over, only broken by Ellie, crying like never James saw her doing this. " But... I want to understand why you didn't say you were in a relationship. " Thank god, Francesca had not told him the whole truth. Ellie barely relaxed, breathing slowly to settle down a little bit. He did not know she was expecting Lars's baby. What a wonderful piece of news! " 'Cause you said you'd kill him, daddy! " " Yeah... I might've said that one day, I admit! " He slowly laughed " I was afraid...I still am. Because I don't wanna lose you, dad. You're my only 'true' parent and I couldn't stand if you reject me. " " I'll do my best to try to... accept the fact that my baby'll have a baby. " " I'm so sorry. " " I wasn't much older than you are when you came into my life, so I can't really blame you. I wished you wouldn't have done this so early but... what can I say? " That was the most akward conversation they had ever had. Within, James was attempting not to shout at her, not to tell her she was ruinning her future as a journalist, the job she always dreamt of, not to say he was really going to kill the man who did that to her. And Ellie was craving for him to be sincere. " Did Fran' tell you what she'd planned, for the medias, when the baby'll be here? " " No. What is it? " " She wants me to say that she's pregnant so that noone won't ever ask a thing. " James chucked, amused by his wife's good sense of responsibilities. " I think that's a great idea since I've planned to study at home. " " Oh, you wanna study, good news! " " Yes... Love you, dad. " Ellie said as she wiped her tears away with a hand " I love you too, honey. " *** " Hum... Are you... " James cleared his throat once more, hoping to get rid of the lump he had in it, his hands trembling on the phone. " Are you Lily Paninter? " He finally finished in his sentence " No, I'm her daughter, Chelsea. She's at the grocery by now. Can I convey your message or something? " Shocked, James swallowed hard, glaring at ouside though the window. The night was there for a while now but he still could see Francesca smoking in the yard, lost in her own thoughts. Suddenly, he heard little cries coming from upstairs : Ellie was playing with her brothers and sisters, not a worry in her head about what was happening with him. He had all in his. When the hell had he thought calling her mother was a good idea? " Hello? " " Oh sorry... No, it's okay. Cool, great..." James was lost, confused in a mass of thoughts. " I mean, just tell her that James called. She'll understand. " ' Just kill that stupid Lily ' kept repeating in his head. God, she had a daughter, a younger daughter, that she was raising and loving. What was wrong with her? James could not focus. Everything around him seemed to scream his name. And he hung up the phone. -------------------------------------------------------------------- Hope you'll enjoy this one too ![]() |
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| Verde Manzanita | January 9, 2013, 8:32 am Post #29 |
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I have no feelings in my soul, where most have passion I got a hole
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Ellie and Lars. Ok, that was utterly unexpected, for sure. Well, wonder how James' gonna take it (not too happily, I think).
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| Powerslave | January 9, 2013, 4:38 pm Post #30 |
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Bad Seed
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Ellie and Lars!? What...! Lars, how could he sleep with his best friends DAUGHTER I really enjoyed the twist, wasn't expecting it all! Lovely chapter moar!
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8:41 PM Jul 10