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Tell me about your brushes with death
Topic Started: May 2 2008, 10:48 AM (672 Views)
Pestiferous
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Never anger the demon baby. If there isn't a cliff nearby to fully secure their death, you must forever live with your demon baby, mentioning nothing of your desire to kill them.

Remember, some day they will be teenagers and you don't want them to stab you in the middle of the night While you sleep, and end up on some made-for-tv movie called "Daughter's Love" or some horseshit like that.



Like my avatar? It has your eyes, doesn't it?
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serendipity
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we posted at the exact same time!


this finally lays to rest all the rumors that wes and i are the same peson.










lol
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theDootle
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I'm still getting over tonsillitis, and my throat swelled up a few days ago. I almost couldn't breathe.

It was fun! :wub:
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ConfusedMonkey
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Cygnus-X1
May 3 2008, 05:16 AM
Well, I was held hostage in a bank by Islamic terrorists that behead people, so...

And, when I was born my umbilical cord was wrapped around my neck 10 times, so...

And, I fell into a bed of man-eating, extra-terrestrial plants that came here on an a meteoroid, so...

And, I was in mud up to my nose with a pack of starving wolves circling me, so...

And, my heart stopped beating for three days, so...

And, I had a tracheotomy in my chest because my neck was too swollen, so...

And, I had my tonsils out twice and nearly bled to death both times, so...


(for Mori)

Que?
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theDootle
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Just ignore it, and it will go away, Monkey...
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ConfusedMonkey
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Lol - like that's ever been the case before, Doots.


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Cygnus-X1
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Here, Monkey:


[dohtml]<embed allowNetworking="all" allowScriptAccess="always" src="http://widgets.nbc.com/o/4727a250e66f9723/4820d551cbec91f" width="384" height="283" quality="high" wmode="transparent" id="W4820d551cbec91f" pluginspage="http://www.macromedia.com/go/getflashplayer" type="application/x-shockwave-flash"> </embed>[/dohtml]
* This post is not a veiled, cryptic insult about anyone.
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ConfusedMonkey
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Uhuh. Perhaps you should change your signature now.
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stevapalooza
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That skit is sooooo unfunny.
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ConfusedMonkey
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Ooh, I remembered something that happened when I was about seven or eight.

I was walking home from school with my mum, and some of the other kids from school and their parents were around. I was running about on the grass by the side of the pavement with a friend, and then suddenly I fell. Down a manhole. Or a maintenance hole or whatever you want to call it.

The concrete around the hole which the lid was fixed to had crumbled away, and when I stood on it it just gave way. But I didn't fall right in, I was sort of wedged because I was wearing a backpack. I was hanging from my backpack with my feet dangling in sewage. If I hadn't been wearing that bag, I would have gone straight in. Mmn, human excrement.

So anyway, my mum pulled me out, and we got some builders from down the road to put the cover back and put some cones around it. Then my mum called the council to tell them what had happened, and they got it fixed a few days later. This is before all the adverts started appearing on TV telling you that you can sue people for just about anything - I would have totally sued if I could have. It ruined my shoes and caused me emotional distress! :D
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stevapalooza
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I don't know if you would've died, but that's definitely a brush with extreme grossness. Although the image of little Jen wedged in a sewer hole is kind of precious. Did the other kids laugh?

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ConfusedMonkey
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Mneh, I doubt I would have died... but if I'd been dunked in raw sewage I would have WANTED to die.

One girl did laugh, but she was an evil evil girl. I hear she's a crackwhore now. :nod:
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stevapalooza
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This gives me a brilliant idea for a children's book. "Jenny the Little Poo Girl"

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ConfusedMonkey
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What is that hat all about?

I hate you. :angry:
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stevapalooza
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It's a Tam O'Shanter! Everyone loves a Tam O'Shanter.
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Cygnus-X1
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Monkey, my reference to that skit was an inside joke between myself and Mori, who sometimes scrolls through the threads here. She and I were recently laughing about that skit in the chat room. Hence: (for Mori).

You've really become quite jaded, haven't you.
* This post is not a veiled, cryptic insult about anyone.
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Pestiferous
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Cyg's a little sensitive today.

Quote:
 
Que?


That's all she said, Cyg. How did you get "jaded" out of that, exactly?
Like my avatar? It has your eyes, doesn't it?
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ConfusedMonkey
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Cyg - for whatever reason, I couldn't see the video you posted yesterday. As much as I refreshed the page and tried to see what you'd posted - I didn't even realise it was a video. So yeah, it just looked like you were being an arse. Particularly in light of all the recent sniping going on here.

Glad to see you weren't really.
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Xx_SwordWords_xX
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Posted Image

This almost killed me.
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ChlamydiaRuntlestuntle
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Ha! Der_Greg.
Midway along the journey of our life
I woke to find myself in a dark wood,
for I had wandered off from the straight path.
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