Welcome Guest [Log In] [Register]


Pokemon Godai Staff
Godai News
Quick Links

Admin Administrators
~Mr. Johnapillar~

G-Mod Global Moderators
~Bones~

B-Mod Board Moderators
~DrakeX~

B-Mod Support Moderators
~Finny~
~Silent Partner~

Current In-Character Season:
Spring!


Month's TotM Winner

ON HOLD
For their thread:
ON HOLD


Want to see where you stand amongst
Godai's strongest? Check out the
Top 10 Leaderboard!

Don't forget to
Vote! --> <-- Vote!

Let's make this year a great one guys!
~Pokemon Godai Staff~


{{The Rules/Godai Resources}}
{{Gen I PokeDex}}
{{Gen II PokeDex}}
{{Gen III PokeDex}}
{{Gen IV PokeDex}}
{{Gen V PokeDex}}
{{Gen VI PokeDex}}
{{Gen VII PokeDex}}
{{EXP Table}}
{{Pokemon Master List}}
{{Godai's TM Catalog}}
{{Godai IC Trivia (Special RP Dex)}}
{{Questionable Moves/Abilities/Items}}
{{Error/Problem Report}}
{{Town Map}}

Add Reply
Athena Rose Draikun; She's ready!
Topic Started: 6 Aug 2015, 05:54 AM (314 Views)
Posted Image Apollo
Member Avatar


Trainer Profile
Posted Image
Character Name: [“Lady”] Athena Rose Draikun (pronounce drak-kon)
Nickname: ‘Thena, Rosey, “The Dragon princess”
Gender: Female
Age: 15
Trainer Class: Lady/Coordinator (possibly pokemon trainer if she builds up the courage)
Birthday: April 25th, 185
Atrological Signs: Cirristeir the Bouffalant (or Years of the Magmar)
Allignment: Lawful good
Religion: Meuism

Height: 5’5”
Weight: 125
Hair Color & Style: The women and men of the Draikun family share a handful of traits. The color and texture of their hair being one many people notice at first glance. Like many others in her family, Athena’s hair is chocolate brown color. It is very thick too and perfectly trimmed, stopping just at her shoulders. The thickness of the hair makes brushing it very difficult and almost unmanageable—it sometimes sound like the crunch of an apple when someone takes their first bite. Athena sometimes has to push herself to continue brushing her hair since it begins to hurt a lot after running the brush through her hair just a couple of times. Only the first few times she runs the brush through her hair does it feel like torture. Afterwards, it starts to feel easy, quick and painless. When she’s done, it feels silky and with a touch of olive oil, it looks shiny and silky too.

Living in Aurmouth City, Athena always felt there were expectations of a girl in her position. Attending a lot of social events, the best thing to do with her hair is to just pull it up into a lovely bun with a tendril or two. Sometimes, she will decorate this bun with a few pieces of jewelry or hair clips or a beautiful rose, which she uses as her personal sigil. This particular fashion is only something she is willing to do for parties or (in the future) contests. If a curling iron is willing, she will curl her hair feeling it looks best when it’s curled. On a regular day, Athena Rose wears her hair out with some sort of hair band or rose. Maybe a long and beautiful ponytail if she is up to it.

Eyes: Like I mentioned before, the Draikun’s share a lot of traits. Eyes that bounce from one color to another being another one each person has and passes to their children. Hazel is a gorgeous eye color that is a combination of many other colors. Some say it’s rare but Athena sees it being very common in her family. Athena’s hazel eyes shimmer and glisten when the light touches them. She can admit she is a little vain when it comes to her eyes. Sometimes it saddens her when her eyes change colors. Too many times has she wakened up to find her hazel eyes gone, replaced by a dull blue color which does not compliment the pigment of her skin. The dull color almost makes her look lifeless. Athena's eyes are almond shaped, relly big too with long lashes and very thin eyebrows.
Clothing/Accessories:

::Winter::

Cold climate, snow and hot beverages, who doesn’t love winter! Winter is Athena’s favorite season and it’s not just because she loves the snow and drinking hot coco. During the coldest season of them all, there is just so much for her to wear. Boots, sneakers, and slippers—jeans, leggings and sweatpants(if permitted by her parents)—a variety of tops! It’s hard for Athena to choose a certain style she likes during the winter since she wears just about whatever she can get her hands on. But if she had to choose, a nice pair of boots, preferably ankle high in either black or some other dark color is always nice. A pair of blue jeans would suit her needs too and a nice long sleeve blouse or sweater too (almost any color is fine with her). However, she is not too big on coats. She finds them to be too heavy, weighing her down all the time. What Athena prefers is a cape cloak, which can be worn in any style. The one she owns is a pearl white color with a blue bow.

::Spring::

Spring is another favorite season of Athena and it’s not just because it’s the season her birthday falls in. Athena was raised to be a lady, one that curtsies while pinching the lower part of her dress and raising it just a little above the ankles. In the spring, Athena loves to wear dresses—maxi dresses, wrap dresses, shirt dresses and sheath dresses. These are all her favorite dresses to wear in the spring time. She absolutely adores wearing the colors blue, pink, purple and yellow. She also loves different patterns on the dress too, especially shapes and flower patterns. Short dresses are nice, but she loves the way long dresses make her feel at times. Long dresses sometimes make her feel as if she’s really the “Dragon princess”. Now as far as shoes go, you will rarely see Athena in a pair of sneakers. Matter a fact, you won’t ever see her in any type of sneaker or anything without a heel (didn’t she wear enough of those in winter?). When spring comes, so do the stilettos and wedges. Athena has perfected the arts of comfortably walking in heels and wedges. Heels can come in a range of colors but when it comes to wedges in spring, Athena only like to wear white and tan colored wedges. Accessories for the spring include gold necklaces, diamond earrings and lots of bracelets. Big floppy and colorful sun hats are worn a lot too.

::Summer::

Athena enjoys the beach and swimming but Summer is her least favorite due to the extremely hot weather. When it comes to summer, Athena makes sure her clothes are extremely light and she avoids dark colors at all cost. Ripped jeans and light colored leggings always look nice and she’ll wear them from time to time but shorts above the knees feels a lot better. Many girls wear short skirts during this time too; however, Athena is not one these girls. She feels very uncomfortable in one. Anyway, short sleeve shirts with different logos, saying and art are always a favorite of hers. Tank tops too, especially in colors like green, baby blue, teal, orange, violet and white. She would also wear dresses during this time too, preferring short dresses that aren’t too tight. With the summer comes a lot of sun, so from time to time Athena will wear a pair of sunglasses. Stud earrings with pokemon faces are her favorite, so she wears those the entire summer and maybe a light gold chain (she tries to avoid wearing heavy jewelry). Sun hats are worn during this season too.

::Fall::

Fall does not hold a lot of clothes options for Athena, so she tries to keep it simple. Jeans of different colors, ripped or not ripped and any color is fine with her. Long sleeve or short sleeve shorts, even a nice top is fine with her. She’ll most like wear a black or white cap with her outfit from time to time too.


Note about clothes: Athena wears kimonos too. She loves just about any color but pink and black are her favorite.

General Appearance:
Posted Image

Athena is an average height girl with a slim figure and glowing olive colored skin. She has lengthy arms and killer long legs you cannot help it but stare at. Athena’s hips are wide and despite her being a little curvy, Athena does not have much body. There is very little muscle in her body too, not needing to lift a finger has given her none whatsoever but carrying her ralts from one place to another is what gives her enough muscle to lift anything under a pound.

This girl was blessed with a perfect heart-shaped head with a strong chin and small ears to compliment it. A pretty and slim face Athena was given; she does not need makeup to touch herself up. She is like a porcelain doll – many would agree—with her glowing complexion, slim face with high cheek bones, a small yet pointy nose and very thin lips. Athena’s eyes are very large and tightly knight together above the bridge of her nose. Athena’s hair falls down the side of her face almost effortlessly too curling just a bit at the bottom and hiding her ears and sometimes her cheeks.

At a very young age, Athena was taught that a girl of her status is supposed to carry herself a certain way. Athena has great posture and that can clearly be shown when she walks. When Athena walks, her back is straight and her hands stay by her side. She makes sure to pick up her feet, never dragging them. Athena takes long graceful steps that almost look like she is strutting. She was taught not to walk too slow and not too fast, finding a pace just between the two—this keeps her from falling or doing anything clumsy. Her walk does not look like much until she is in a long flowing dress. When she is in this particular dress, Athena does not appear to be walking but gliding. She looks like an angel.



Hometown: Aurmouth City, South Godai

Personality:

Many would describe Athena as a sweet and very kind individual. She is the type of person who tries to befriend everyone she meets and that is never too hard for her. People seem to be attracted to her peaceful demeanor and gentle behavior. The girl is truly soft at heart and oh my, how big is her heart. You would think a girl who was raised in an environment where everything was handed to her, where she received the best and only the best, would be more stuck up and uncaring for those beneath her status. This might be true for many of her family members but never Athena Rose. How kind she is can be proven through her words, which are never anything negative or foul. The girl’s actions too and the way she looks after everyone else, especially the pokemon. The young girl has a love for pokemon like no other and many may sense that about her.

Athena is very generous and perhaps this is the first thing many notice about her. She is willing to help those in need out the most. Whether it is a person in need of a few dians just to get by or a pokemon in critical condition, Athena is more than happy to help. “Treat others the way you want to be treated” often comes to mind when she takes care of others—it is actually her motto. Athena believes that whatever you give out to the world, you shall receive. Athena is willing to give in order to receive; however, that does not mean she will allow people to take advantage of her. To take what she is giving without so much as showing a little gratitude is just wrong and that is something she knows.

As a lady, Athena tries her best to be as polite as possible; minding her P’s and Q’s and being quite the civil person. Athena is one person who shows respect all the time, even when it seems like a person does not seem worthy of it. A rare sight for young girls nowadays, Athena shows a ladylike nature in every possible way from the way she walks to the way she speaks.

All of this may be due to her father’s own negative attitude toward certain people and situations. Athena’s father cares very little for pokemon and even people at times. Athena sees that too and tries her hardest to be everything he is not. Being honest and truthful for one, Athena tries her best to be honest with those around her and herself. In her opinion, honesty is essential to keep a good relationship with the people you surround yourself with. She surrounds herself with many close friends and family members, maintaining a healthy relationship with all of them due to her striving to be truthful. Lying has never been something she has been very good at and even if she did successfully commit telling a lie, in the end she would have to tell the truth. Guilt would overwhelm her and force her to tell the truth.

Being everything Mormont is not can strike up a few good traits but they can also create bad ones. Athena lacks the courage many others—especially people of her status—have. At one point, Athena had no courage whatsoever especially when it came to pokemon battles. Little by little she is surely building the courage up, but it is not enough to stop her from doubting herself at times and her capability to do things. She fears many things at the moment, including losing her pokemon who she cares deeply for. She also fears the unexpected. You may say she also lacks bravery, letting these certain fears get the best of her (same goes for her emotions).

It is true that Athena tries her hardest to be everything her father is not but she is still a girl fortunate enough to be born into a family with money and with money comes a very luxurious life and exquisite taste. Athena’s taste is indeed very exquisite. The girl’s taste in clothing, food and many other things has always been rich and nothing less. She loves clothes by big designers and cannot see herself wearing anything less. Food is not just something you put in a microwave for a minute and eat to her, she values a home cooked meal that has been made with love and care. Athena expects only the best at times and many find that hard to believe since she seems to be fine with just about everything. You can say she likes living the life of a pampered princess.

Athena finds every pokemon to be special and unique creatures who appeal to different people in different ways. Athena absolutely loves all pokemon but it’s the cute type pokemon that make her go insane. Yes, she is a typical lady trainer who cannot resist the cuteness of baby pokemon or the beauty of certain pokemon. She is willing to catch ‘em all ( ;) ).

There are a lot of things Athena loves/likes, which is what I mentioned above but there is not a lot that Athena dislikes. A rude or self-absorb person is probably one thing Athena dislikes. She tries her best to be selfless and to see others not try to do the same makes her very upset. Another thing she dislikes is seeing her pokemon in the worse condition ever, this sickens her and that is something that can be clearly seen.




History:

Athena Rose is one of the fortunate children of Godai, being born into a very wealthy and very powerful family known as the Draikun Dynasty. The Draikuns are somewhat known for their talents in dragon taming and it is often you will hear them boasting about how their family are the descendants of the “first” people to train dragon type pokemon—obviously this is not true seeing that there are different types of dragon pokemon and each pokemon is different than the next. But people let the family believe they are descendants of the “first” dragon tamers because not only were they really good with dragon type pokemon but they were partnered with a few big industries in Godai and owned a couple of businesses themselves too including an academy school that specializes in training dragon-type pokemon and a luxurious country club in their hometown, Aurmouth City.

Athena Rose was born to the head of the Draikun dynasty, a man who liked to call himself the “Dragon King” and a gorgeous dragon tamer who only became a Draikun by marriage—she was referred to –by her husband- as the “Dragon Queen”. While Athena Rose’s father, Mormont Draikon IV was more of a self-absorb, pompous jerk, the girl’s mother, Lily Ann was a sweet and very generous woman and although she loves her husband very much, she admits from time to time that his attitude is not a very pleasant one and because of Mormont’s unpleasant attitude, Lily Ann tends to spend a lot of time with her children and she tries her best to teach them what is right. Lily Ann did not have to teach her third child and only daughter, Athena Rose, how to behave. The moment she was born, it was clear to her mother that she was different than the others in the Draikun family. Even as a baby she was gentle, kind and very sweet just like her beloved mother. Still, she was pampered and lavished in the lap of luxury.

At a very young age, she was exposed to pokemon—specifically dragon-type pokemon. The Draikun dynasty owned a very large estate in Aurmouth City with a mansion big enough to give each and every member of the family their own room. Pokemon battles happened often outside on the property and as long as a nanny, an older sibling or one of her parents were with her, she was allowed to go outside and watch these battles and after the battle is done and over with, she was allowed to play with the pokemon. She enjoyed chasing the pokemon around and vice versa—if the pokemon belonged to her parents or one of her older brothers, she was allowed to ride the pokemon. Athena’s love for pokemon seemed only natural. Though many of the pokemon she played with did not belong to her, Athena still cared for the pokemon as if they did. She made sure they were well fed, healthy and happy. The members of the Draikun family often joked about Athena and the pokemon. “One day, my pokemon will leave me for the little Dragon princess and I’ll never get ‘em back” was a common joke around the household whenever Athena interacted with the pokemon.

Mormont’s every day routine included making business deals, starting new businesses and making sure the other businesses ran smoothly; to make sure all of this was possible, Mormont did a lot of traveling and he would often be gone for several days. When he is gone for too long (which is always), Athena’s mother, her two older brothers and herself would go visit him. Athena’s mother would have to force her father to take a day off and do something with their family. If there was a beach in the specific location they were currently in, they would visit it and if not, the family would tour the city or town until they find something to do—they never failed. The family always found something to do and enjoyed it for the most part and it created fond memories for little Athena Rose. But none of those little vacations and trips could compare to the one vacation she had in Cascadia City.

When Athena turned five her parents bought a lovely home in the beautiful city and they stayed in this lovely home for many months now. Athena and her two brothers got to know the city like the back of their hand, not to mention the locals too—many pokemon battles happened between her brothers and the locals. It was during a battle one of her brothers was having that she noticed a gardevoir, teleporting whenever she pleased from one place to another. Leaving the area where the battling was happening, she followed this gardevoir, who eventually led the little girl into an abandon building. When the two were alone, the gardevoir approached Athena with a very large object in her hands. The object was then placed in front of Athena, who picked it up and once she did, the gardevoir had vanished. Athena had no idea where the gardevoir had come from and she had no clue about the object the pokemon has given her. It was not until she showed her brothers that she learned that it was a pokemon egg.

Immediately, they rushed home and showed their parents. Athena’s mother encourages her to hold on to the egg since she believed the gardevoir had given her the egg for a reason. Athena’s father discouraged her from keeping the egg. He believed the Draikun dynasty could only train dragon-type pokemon and taking on any other type that was not part dragon would disgrace the family and what they stood for. Listening to her mother, she kept the egg. This made her father very upset—he tried to bribe her, give her other eggs that were of dragon-type pokemon but she refused. Mormont tried everything he could to influence his daughter to give up the egg but she still refused. Whilst, he loved his daughter Mormont was very disappointed and he had given up all hope for her.

Athena carried that egg with her everywhere, even school—which wasn’t really prohibited but with much persuasion from her father, she was able to continue carrying it around school. She did everything with the egg, including sleep. The egg never left her sight; it was always in her hands until one day… it finally hatched. She was sleep when this happened and when she awoke, she found nothing in her hands, not even pieces of the broken shell. The little girl began to panic, screaming and crying, drawing the attention of the entire household. For his little girl, Mormont started a big search group—it only include the family and their dragon-type pokemon but the group was big enough to search the entire city and they almost did if Athena Rose did not sit in her room and continue to sob over her missing pokemon. The pokemon, a ralts, sensed the very unhappy girl and she too became unhappy and began to cry. Athena quickly stopped, following the sound of a crying pokemon. She followed the sound until she reached her closet, where the pokemon was. The ralts was all dressed up in her clothes and crying until it sensed her happiness and became happy too.

The ralts made Athena very happy and earned the nickname, Lady Joy (or just Joy). The ralts, who was now called Joy, was treated the same way her owner was treated. Joy became a pampered pokemon, who grew a liking for clothes, jewelry and only the best. Frequently, Athena and her pokemon would dress alike and almost act a like due to the ralts’ senses. Athena took care of Joy and Joy did her best to take care of Athena. There was much love between the two and the ralts was always walking about and never in a pokeball; had Athena never really had the heart to put her in one. The ralts and Athena cuddled, they laughed, she even took the ralts to her secondary school where she joined a little club that care very much for cute pokemon. It was in this club, Athena met her two best friends, Bianca and Jessica. Athena and ralts would often go over their house and have pokemon play dates or sleepovers where the girls would talk about becoming what they most desired. The two did everything except battle—and that’s what the ralts yearned for the most. The two would watch the family get together and battle, ralts would always want to join in but Athena never wanted to. It was not until she was thirteen, the ralts finally convinced Athena to let her fight—to take on a pokemon.

It was a battle with her brother, who was a really good pokemon trainer. He treated his sister like all other opponents he had taken on, showing no mercy whatsoever. The pokemon he commanded did the same, beating ralts like a punching bag and squeezing the life out of her. This scared Athena Rose, who forfeits the match. She did not like seeing her ralts get hurt and thought the best way to prevent it was to never fight again. That is exactly what she did too for the next year. Ralts wanted to continue on but without Athena’s permission, did not. The ralts became a little miserable and the only one that noticed that was Athena’s mother, Lily Ann. She confronted her daughter about this problem, who denied it. Athena Rose saw nothing wrong with her pokemon, believing all was fine. Well, she tried to believe it but eventually saw that her ralts really wanted to battle from time to time.

Athena was still too scared. She did not want to see her precious pokemon get hurt. She told her mother this when she finally admitted that ralts wanted fight in a pokemon battle and Lily Ann decided to help her daughter with her fear. Lily Ann taught her daughter that it was okay for pokemon to get hurt in battle sometimes, she taught her daughter how to be stronger in battle too and with much practice, Athena became a little stronger in battle.

Now, she battles quite often with ralts. Athena became a Lady, who battled pokemon trainers passing by Aurmouth and giving them money whenever she lost (which was almost always). When she first started out as a lady trainer, Athena did one on one battles. Later on, when she soon got the hang of it, Athena started doing triple battles with her friends—who became well-known as one of the best trio to battle. Ralts enjoyed teaming up with other pokemon and She began to like battling pokemon. The more battles the two took on, the more Athena began to notice something about her pokemon. The ralts fought gracefully and each move she made was beautiful. The last trainer she battled in Aurmouth noticed this too and told her Joy would do great in a contest.

Athena watched a few on TV and decided ralts would do very well. She had dreams too of her ralts winning all sorts of competitions and finally decided she wanted to become a coordinator. Being a coordinator was never a thought she had until now and she is determined to become the best.




Inventory

Dians: *dian* 1,000

Items:
Posted Image 5x Pokéball

Key Items:
Posted Image PokéDex
Posted Image Journal
Posted Image Holocaster

Trainer AdvancementAdvancement Points: 0
Tier 0:


Pokemon

Total EXP Gained: 0

Pokemon
Posted Image
(Ralts)
Caught at Level 5


Nickname: Lady Joy or Joy
Gender: Female
Type: Pyschic, Fairy
Ability: Synchronize
Height: 1’4”
Weight: 14.6 lbs
Health: Weak
EXP Rate: Slow
EXP Gauge: (7/9)
EXP Gained: 0
Level: 5
Division: D10
Total Stats: 45
  • Attack: 9
  • Defense: 9
  • Sp. Attack: 11 (25%)
  • Sp. Defense: 8
  • Speed: 8

Vitamins Used: None
Moveset:
1. Growl
4.Confusion

Unique Moves:
-
-
-
-
Item:


PC Box: Stored Pokemon


Journal

Adventure Log
 
Adventure Log goes in here



Edited by Apollo, 10 Aug 2015, 07:43 AM.
Posted Image
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Posted Image Mr. Johnapillar
Member Avatar


This is some good work~ nice use of table formatting as well. We do need to clarify a few things though. Moving down the profile, I'll list what needs altering.

Make sure to use Capitals at the start of things. It's also spelled Bouffalant.

Next, Hair and eyes are more than color. For hair, how long is it, what's it's texture, thinkness? Does she use product to keep it that way? With Eyes, what about shape? expressiveness? what about their relation to her brow? So much more information than just color exists within the eyes.

Moving down, a picture is not acceptable for clothing. Use your words, describe her usual style, what she wears when it's hot, when it's cold, if she feels like dressing up, these are all useful tools for helping you write a setting without describing the scenery.

Most of the information in your general appearance belongs above. You start off nice, but give more information about how she moves, her posture, what people might think when looking at her, things like that really bring a character to life.

About her personality, unfortunately what you've described isn't quite possible given the history. It's true that there can be genetic triggers for more empathetic people, but unfortunately it's very very uncommon for someone without knowledge of what it's like to be impoverished to be so compassionate all around. That's not to say you need to make her stuck up or mean, but without that knowledge, she can't be empathetic or compassionate all the time, which means that her naivete leads to her being ignorant of their struggles.

Otherwise, you could round her out by having her relationship with her father be strenuous and lead her to be wary about people like him. Very nice people can come out of relationships like these, and they can be naive to a point, but they do recognize people who can hurt them.

So my advice to you would be to consider possibilities like these and flesh them out in your history, I think the first would be more organic for what you have now, but the latter can make for more interesting and diverse interactions with NPCs and other characters, and possibly make her more relatable. It's up to you as a writer to decide~

While you're in there, maybe add some more information about different likes and dislikes, what kinds of morals she has (what she considers to be right and wrong in the extreme) and maybe some other things that hopefully Wremn or another mod can help with because I'm still not very good at helping to build personalities.

Next, I do just want to ask about your intentions with the gardevoir bestowing Athena with the egg. If that is part of a later plot point, then please keep it, and kudos for thinking ahead. If it is just a mechanism to get an egg, then please reconsider as it seems excessive and implausible. Otherwise your history is pretty good, maybe a note about her schooling and childhood friends besides her siblings and pokemon, these are very important factors in the development of a child.

Moving down, your inventory only needs game affecting items, your supplies should be included as the plot is necessitates them.

You cannot have a hidden ability. Good job with the EXP though~ For stats, 25% of 45 is not 10, try the math again and redistribute accordingly.

And finally, you need to bold all STAB moves, that is all Psychic and Fairy type moves that deal damage.

Otherwise, great job, I hope this helps you build up your character a little more. Thanks for writing with us~
Posted Image

Seth Halley Thawyer • Astronomer • Total EXP Gained: 369 • Dians: *dian* 300 • Location: Serenity Lake

Pokemon


Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Posted Image Apollo
Member Avatar


Made the necessary changes and edits :) and yes, gardevoir is apart of a plot I hope to play out once I reach Cascadia city!
Edited by Apollo, 9 Aug 2015, 03:53 PM.
Posted Image
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Posted Image Wremn
Member Avatar
Blerrraaaugh -fire-

Hello, Apollo! *Squeals* Athena is soooo adorable! I apologize on behalf of the rest of the staff, however, on how long it took give you a response to your great edits! Just a few more enhancements and you're good to go.

  • Bad to balance the good. How does Athena react when she isn't treated like a pampered princess? You spoke about her fear. Does she speak up when her status is threatened? How does she react to negativity and rudeness on the inside? How does she deal with her fear? Disgust? Anger? Does she avoid her problems and turn to what she owns and what she is most familiar to? Or does Athena have a more round-about way of dealing with her shortcomings and failures? Is she harsh on herself if she is sometimes unable to live up to her lady-like standard? You said she loves to give. Does this also include her possessions, or simply her time? What does she enjoy giving the most? The least?

    I'd say your personality is almost there! You just need to add a little more regarding her negative traits, for she still seems too perfect.

  • As for your history. It is pretty good to me. Just make sure to captialize Pokemon names (such as Ralts and Gardevoir) and be wary of your tense. Athena's father/other disdain regarding the Ralts seemed to have dissipated after it hatched, making it seem like you omitted an event that allowed the Ralts to be accepted in the dynasty. Finally, if the majority of the history is written in past tense, then the rest should be written in past tense.


The rest of your profile is splendid! Next time, please, please, please post here again if we happen to overlook your profile. This should not happen again in the future, but if you don't receive a response after a day, you can always B.U.M.P. it. (Bring Up My Post). I apologize again.

You're almost there Apollo! Just a little more patience and you'll be on your way. :)

Posted Image


Characters
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
1 user reading this topic (1 Guest and 0 Anonymous)
« Previous Topic · Incomplete Characters · Next Topic »
Add Reply

~Affiliates~
FTG Pokemon: Terrene Living the Dream: a Pokemon RPG Pokemon: Forever Forgotten Ironside image Bleach Platinum Hearts


Remember to vote for Pokemon Godai as your favorite Pokemon RP Site!!!

Vote for us every day by clicking the banner above!

Black Water created by tiptopolive of the Zetaboards Theme Zone
Pokémon ©1995-2016 Nintendo, Creatures, The Pokémon Company and GAMEFREAK.