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| [A]Keifael Chrystosom; [Accepted] "Sod off." | |||||
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| Tweet Topic Started: 1 Sep 2013, 12:33 AM (410 Views) | |||||
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1 Sep 2013, 12:33 AM Post #1 | ||||
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Character Name: Keifael Chrystosom Nickname: Keif, Kei Gender: Male Age: 17 Trainer Class: Pokemon Trainer Height: 5'11" Weight: 160 lbs. Hair Color & Style: Keifael sports black cow-licked hair. Eyes: Keifael has very peculiar purple eyes. Clothing/Accessories: Keifael wears a three-fourths long hooded white jacket with a red formal suit inside. He wears black formal pants and pointed shoes. General Appearance: Keifael is not handsome, neither is he ugly. He’d look like a punk if you put earrings, but he doesn’t really like those styles. He has long legs, used to work out, although not anymore giving him a half muscular half skinny impression. Hometown: Winterhart Village, North Godai Personality: “Become stronger. You’re not powerless,” are the words that would always reverberate in Keifael’s hollow, thick skull. These exact same words are the words his mother told him, while they were at the brink of despair. Keifael Chrystosom was born an only child into a rich family. His parents were businessmen, so they were often not at his gigantic house. He didn’t care. He understood, at least, somewhat. He understood that it was all for the good of himself. His parents were very business-minded as well, and most of the time had tunnel vision, so they didn’t have enough time with him. He understood this too. He was an obedient son that did well in his grades. He loved his parents, and never wanted them to let go. He gradually gained his parents’ tunnel vision and became much focused, but later on, his love gradually fell as he desperately wanted attention. This later built up into rage and hatred for his parents. He started to resent them for not appreciating his feats. On top of all that, he would come home from school to find his parents fighting… about money. He hated seeing his parents this way, so he rebelled, called his parents’ ambitions for him “a load of bollocks,” and ran away. He ran deep into the woods, where a Croagunk dropped on his head, knocking him out. He later wakes up to the same Croagunk, who’s taking care of him. He shrugged him off saying that he doesn’t need any other power other than his own. He ran from the Croagunk, but it later dropped on his head again, not wanting to leave him alone. The Croagunk follows him, until Keifael got tired of it and wanted to throw it over a nearby waterfall. The Croagunk was nimble, and was able to evade by vaulting over his head. This action made Keif lose his balance and he toppled over the edge, and into the cascades of the waterfall. Thinking this would be the end, he suddenly felt a wet appendage cling on to his arm, and he saw the same Croagunk when he looked up, struggling to bring him up. Keif was touched; he never knew anybody had that kind of compassion for him. He ended up adopting the Croagunk and named it Cascade, since he saved him from one. Cascade followed Keif until he went and returned to his parents. He saw his parents on a small, metal hut beside their old house, which is now abandoned. They were flooded with debts, and couldn’t handle it. His father later left, and this is where his mother wanted him to become stronger. He took it directly, and he started to train to become stronger, he also became more anti-social and aggressive onto people, but he would always help them, like his friend Cascade helped him. He wanted to find his dad, as he wanted to say sorry, and so, he left his mum (who approved of his decision) and journeyed on with Cascade. Inventory Dians: 1,000Items: Key Items: PokéDexAdvancement Points: (0/30) - Tier 0 Pokemon Total EXP Gained: 0
PC Box: Stored Pokemon Journal
Edited by Septentrione, 6 Sep 2013, 09:42 PM.
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Keifael Chrystosom | |||||
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6 Sep 2013, 06:16 PM Post #2 | ||||
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Okay, good job~ Now to be nitpicky lol. Your moves are numbered incorrectly, your EXP gauge should read 7/9, your total stats should be 45, not 40, and I need to know what percent you used on speed. I'm also not too terribly happy with the history but I'll get another's opinion on it before we ask you to change anything. |
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![]() Seth Halley Thawyer • Astronomer • Total EXP Gained: 369 • Dians: 300 • Location: Serenity LakePokemon | |||||
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6 Sep 2013, 07:21 PM Post #3 | ||||
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To be honest, I am not a big fan of the history. There is, to be blunt, no story behind this. I would like for there to be a little more meat on the bones, more in depth on how they owed money, and what happened while he was gone. So that way this is more fleshed out, and we know what exactly he came home to. So we can see the mental effect as well as his resolve. The blaming of one-self is understandable. Rich kid with no priorities, no care for anyone but himself lost the people who cared for him the most. Just flesh it out, follow what John said and we'll proceed from there~ |
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![]() Corvo Marek Jacob Sterling
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6 Sep 2013, 08:25 PM Post #4 | ||||
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Alrighty, I can give this Approval 1/2 | ||||
![]() Seth Halley Thawyer • Astronomer • Total EXP Gained: 369 • Dians: 300 • Location: Serenity LakePokemon | |||||
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6 Sep 2013, 09:47 PM Post #5 | ||||
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And here's my approval~ Your character application has now been accepted! Please make sure to create a signature of your character. Once that is done, you are now free to RP! If you made a personal mistake with your character, please submit a modification process involving a revamp. This topic is now closed without further ado. |
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![]() Corvo Marek Jacob Sterling
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