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Pretending
Topic Started: Apr 30 2016, 10:08 AM (190 Views)
Oscar
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Do you think that its important to pretend with people? To pretend that their opinions are important, or that their suffering is legit?

Because I have tended to clearly state or show that their opinion was not important people have tended to dislike me as if I was self-important. I wouldn't give them an inch.

I don't think that I have pretending down. I'm sure that there is something to be learned here. I just dont know what the right 'balance' is.

Maybe its what they call compassion.
Edited by Oscar, Apr 30 2016, 10:08 AM.
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crow
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No. Pretending is not good. Unless purely for humor and fun.
You are what you are, and your behavior should reflect this. If you don't like what you are, change it.
You will either care, or not care; you'll have an excess of compassion, or you won't.
It's all to do with honesty, and if you're not used to being honest, it can be initially quite scary to project.

Funny thing about people: you can get the idea that they don't like you because of you.
More often, they don't like you because of them.
The trick is to abandon any attachment to having everyone - or even anyone - like you.
"Squawk!" said the crow, and then made space.
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Oscar
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I don't want to put steel to steel, if I can avoid it. When I strike their ego heads on there is this collision and suddenly there is war in the air. Im sure that there is a better way. I want to stay true to myself but maybe change the procedure an inch and not rush in like a bull that sees a red flag.
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crow
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The world is not the way you'd like it to be. Most people are afflicted with varying degrees of madness, about which there is nothing you can do. The only practical course you have, is to ensure you do not become one of them.
It's difficult to disengage from people, but what are you, anyway, a socialist?
With practice, not needing people pays off, bigtime.
And I've found that, over time, you end up being respected, rather than liked, although that too may come later.
Edited by crow, Apr 30 2016, 03:50 PM.
"Squawk!" said the crow, and then made space.
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Mustafa
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You'll grow to be a fine man Oscar. Oscar means man you know that?

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=bxkRoAbJ0tc
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