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Dirt.
Topic Started: Dec 30 2017, 10:00 PM (72 Views)
Water
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I used to get my kicks from piracetam.
It's a allosteric modulator of NMDA and ampakine channels. Say it again. Does that mean anything to you?
De nada. Its not just the effect it has, it also does science things. Whoo-eee.
It felt really great. Going so fast. Being so smrat.
In hindsight it lead to no useful gain in any area of my life, bar the vanity of feeling smart.

On several occasions I've had the good fortune to trip on LSD.
I've had some great times, learnt some things. Also seen friends burn out and come to turmoil, psychiatric disorders.
I used to think LSD was something necessary, a vital catalyst for the spiritual.
To a lesser extent, I felt the same way about cannabis. I used to always smoke up before meditation. I thought I needed it to get anywhere.

And so on, with brainwave entrainment, a necessity for success with meditation.
As though meditation is something to win at.

Division from what is.
There is more truth in a handful of dirt than there is in all the minds of men.

That phrase popped into my head while I was meditating. I didn't think it. It's not from me.
It doesn't make any damned sense at all. Except that it does, or rather, is.
It's a doing thing, it must be done to be known, thinking is it's antonym.
And while I'm a thinking thing right now, sometimes a part of me, enough of me, can become a doing thing.

I don't need things to meditate, I don't need drugs to make it work. You do it or you don't. But to do it you need to not do it. It's a paradox, a mystery, it is exactly what it is, and although I, caught up in my chains and my burdens, will writhe and kick and scream, I can accept it. I won't always, but I can.

It's kind of funny, I always used to envision getting somewhere through meditation, becoming something more, being more than I am, smarter, better, more confident, sexier. And now having progressed a little further down that road, I find myself wanting to become less. Not all piled on with embellishments lies. To quote SorenL: "I just want to be".
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
You are more than your identity.
More accurately, your identity is less than what you could be, identity reduces you.
Fear in a great greasy bag, slow fear, the invisible kind identified by it's effect.


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Sacred Fire
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That's the issue with psychedelics, or rather, the people who take them. You hear a lot about the spiritual properties of such things. And yet, it doesn't seem as if the people who take that stuff have any deep insights, other than talking about drugs a lot.

Maybe it works for some people. Far be it from me to tell anybody "no." But I stay away from it, myself. Just meditate and stuff. Better to do it without any equipment, so I don't become dependent.
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Water
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I wouldn't have come to this forum without drugs, in a very roundabout way. I used to be a hard atheist, idolised Vijay Prozak and valued intellect above all else.

Experimenting with DXM in my early 20's made me take meditation seriously which lead to a ... attempted/aborted kundalini awakening. Lets just say the experience put me on my ass.

Tripping on shrooms/acid gave me insight into my behaviour and broadly speaking led to some much needed maturity. Attempting to meditate while tripping led to outright acceptance of the things Crow writes.

Pot never did anything useful for me.

Without doing the drugs thing I'd probably still be some entitled manchild.

I saw this interview with David Bowie and he said overcoming his drug addictions made him a better person than he would have been had he never used drugs. He said the journey he took wasn't for everyone but hypothetically if you could go through it your life would be enriched.

Experience maketh the man. In my case I used chemicals to force the matter. It got me there in the end but at the cost a lot of money and mild cognitive/memory deficits.
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