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Jokes
Topic Started: Apr 9 2013, 12:54 AM (390 Views)
Cleorara
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Em.. I have to tell some jokes in class tomorrow as a assignment and i want to try and do some funny ones... I'm going to post a few, please tell me what you think... (They said it has to be school appropriate and we can do blonde jokes. Heres the first one --blond joke, im blond too so no offense if I upset you...)
A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do.

"Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?"
The blonde said, "How about 50 dollars?" The man agreed and told her that the paint and ladders that she might need were in the garage. The man's wife, inside the house, heard the conversation and said to her husband, "Does she realize that the porch goes all the way around the house?"
The man replied, "She should. She was standing on the porch."

A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money.
"You're finished already?" he asked. "Yes," the blonde answered, "and I had paint left over, so I gave it two coats. "Impressed, the man reached in his pocket for the $50. "And by the way," the blonde added, "that's not a Porch, it's a Ferrari."
Don't steal my gold. -_-
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Kyokuku
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Theres no room for optimism in my position... If I tried seeing the glass half full I'd just be lying to myself.
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Baruru
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... you're like a constant downer huh?

OOC
Bububu! don't take it personally~
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Kyokuku
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You could say that...
(( Charlie the unicorn? ))
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Baruru
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bubu, you need some lightening up!

((yes xD))
Bububu! don't take it personally~
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Kyokuku
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I'll lighten up when I'm no longer considered a menace to society.
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Baruru
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.... since when did THAT happen...?
Bububu! don't take it personally~
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Kyokuku
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N-Nevermind... I don't want to talk about it.
Edited by Kyokuku, Apr 13 2013, 03:17 AM.
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Tsububu
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Nitohei
Neheh. She says it like its a bad thing. Menace to society. Hah. Society has better things to do that go around labeling 'menaces'.
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Cleorara
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((Whats charlie the unicorn?))
Everyone's hypocrites, and while I dislike hypocricy I have to keep in mind that I'm one too. It doesn't even have to be a big deal. You could go on a rant and tell someone else that lying is bad and then later you'll probably tell one yourself. There's not really anything you can do about it - you'd have to be impeccable to not be a hypocrite, and nobody's perfect. ^_^
Don't steal my gold. -_-
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Kyokuku
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Nope. Society has nothing better to do. All they care about is being exactly like everyone else and finding scapegoats, ignoring the real problems like corrupt politicians, a flawed legal system and an extremely large gap n the distribution of weath that leave many starving on the streets while rich families live in luxury and rarely work a day in their lives.
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Cleorara
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...i duno how hypocricy has to do with political-societyish stuff but sure. i guess. i duno..
Don't steal my gold. -_-
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Tsububu
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Nitohei
Not everyone is a hypocrite; someone who believes one thing but does another. Some people know what they want and they just go for it without a second thought. Thus making them not hypocrites, Cleo.
But politicians will promise people everything under the sun to get you to vote for them; when they get elected they don't do jack squat. So they are hypocrites.
Edited by Tsububu, Apr 13 2013, 04:43 PM.
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Baruru
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Cleorara
Apr 13 2013, 12:46 PM
((Whats charlie the unicorn?))
Everyone's hypocrites, and while I dislike hypocricy I have to keep in mind that I'm one too. It doesn't even have to be a big deal. You could go on a rant and tell someone else that lying is bad and then later you'll probably tell one yourself. There's not really anything you can do about it - you'd have to be impeccable to not be a hypocrite, and nobody's perfect. ^_^
((Charlie the Unicorn is a short series on youtube of a male unicorn named charlie who is constantly almost killed by [male or female? no one knows for sure] a pink and blue unicorn. XD it's kinda hard to explain.... but they're one of SecretAgentBob's many projects XD))
Bububu! don't take it personally~
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Calili/226
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oh... okay~....
ill look at it later. maybe.
my profile explains everything.. mrow~
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Umimi
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Ehh... I thought this here was a joke thread... Oh I got a good one!
Umimi's Actions

Why wouldn't the lobster share?
Because...
Umimi's actions

Answer + More of Umimi's Actions
At least people can't ask if I'm right-handed. Heheh.
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Itacici
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Eheh. I thought it was going to be; because Nu-su ate it!
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Edited by Itacici, May 24 2013, 09:20 PM.
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Bananu
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Cleo: snicker xD
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Umimi
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I have another.
What is black and white and goes: "oooooooooooooooo?"
Answer


Edited by Umimi, May 25 2013, 09:28 PM.
At least people can't ask if I'm right-handed. Heheh.
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Kyokuku
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Nu-su: Did somebody say lobster? :D
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Umimi
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Uhm... Yes. :3
At least people can't ask if I'm right-handed. Heheh.
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Kyokuku
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Nu-su: -gets a fork and a knife- where'd the critter go, Hahahah!
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