Countdown to Christmas
| Kia ora! Welcome to our community! We hope you enjoy your visit. Te Marae is a New Zealand themed forum designed to share the alluring qualities of the country and its people. Our friendly members welcome you to join our community regardless of your nationality, especially if you wish to learn something interesting about us! Please browse our forum in guest-mode until your heart's content. If you choose to register you'll have access to special members-only sections. (It's pretty awesome!) We are happy to accomodate members with busy schedules who still love to chat with others, so don't let this be a reason to remain in the shadows. Don't be shy, join in on the fun! Have you already made up your mind? Great! Register Now Already a member? Sign in below: |
| European english. | |
|---|---|
| Topic Started: 11 Jul 2013, 12:58 AM (24 Views) | |
| Sandy | 11 Jul 2013, 12:58 AM Post #1 |
![]()
Administrator
![]()
|
The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the EU rather than German which was the other possibility. As part of the negotiations, Her Majesty's Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a five year phase-in plan that would be known as "Euro-English". In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of the "k". This should klear up konfusion and keyboards kan have 1 less letter. There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year, when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like "fotograf" 20% shorter. In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be ekspekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible. Governments will enkorage the removal of double letters, which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horible mes of the silent "e"s in the language is disgraseful, and they should go away. By the fourth year, peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v". During ze fifz year, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou" and similar changes vud of kors be aplid to ozer kombinations of leters. After zis fifz yer, ve vil hav a reli sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi to understand ech ozer. Ze drem vil finali kum tru! And zen world! |
| Offline Profile | Quote ^^^ |
| 1 user reading this topic (1 Guest and 0 Anonymous) | |
| « Previous Topic · Jokes. · Next Topic » |





2:02 PM Jul 11
