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Keeping Secrets
Topic Started: Jul 13 2012, 09:55 PM (111 Views)
Leon
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When you keep secrets, does that make you just as guilty as the person who you're keeping a secret for? Is it even keeping a secret when the person doesn't know you know?

Because unfortunately, of my three family members (my mom, my dad, and my sister), I have so much dirt on them... and they don't even know it. I keep their secrets without them knowing. They each think the rest of our family is too stupid to ever catch them, but perhaps their arrogance will be their downfall. After all, I know. So it can only be a matter of time before everyone else does, too.

Does keeping their secrets make me just as guilty and as bad a person when it all comes out? D: I've really been thinking about this. I mean, if it's going to keep your family together, I think it's worth being a bad person in the end... Don't you?
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Geoffrey
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I don't think not exposing their dirt makes you a bad person. You haven't done anything, and you aren't obligated to tell anything (unless it involves some serious crime and then you have to report it) but I doubt that's the case here.
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Leon
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Geoffrey
Jul 13 2012, 09:58 PM
I don't think not exposing their dirt makes you a bad person. You haven't done anything, and you aren't obligated to tell anything (unless it involves some serious crime and then you have to report it) but I doubt that's the case here.
No, it's nothing like that, but still... I can't help but wonder. :srsly:
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Stacha
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I have loved the stars too fondly to be fearful of the night.

I don't mind keeping secrets. Friends confide in my all the time, and I don't feel guilty at all knowing what I know. Ultimately it's their life and not my place to say anything, regardless of how I feel.
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Leon
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But this is your family. Say you knew one of your parents was having an affair. Not in the act, per se, but on the way to it for sure. Say you knew all of what your sibling was doing, and you knew your parents would be angry. Say you knew your other parent was making decisions he swore long ago to quit. Wouldn't you feel slightly guilty or at fault when everything spilled out in the open? Again, they don't know that I know... But how can I look at myself, knowing I know, and that I did nothing?
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Stacha
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I have loved the stars too fondly to be fearful of the night.

I know a lot about my family that I don't agree with, at all. But if they aren't willing to step up and do the right thing, that's their problem and I won't be weighed down by it. My dad is dangerously close to alienating me to the point where we are a very small part of each other's lives. I'm seriously considering trying to convince David to move us out of state after we're married.
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Geoffrey
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You should move to your western neighbors. We have no secrets over here.

Ha, can't even type that with a straight face. xD
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Stacha
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I have loved the stars too fondly to be fearful of the night.

Haha, I don't know where we'll go. Just not Chicago. XD
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Beverly
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No one is perfect. Everyone has their private vices and secrets. No one is above reproach. Just as you are keeping their secrets, they are keeping yours.
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Ardy
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I would say no, it doesn't really make you a bad person. Some things should be said, others not so much. I've always been a person who believes that some things should be left unsaid if they're really not all that important. When Ashley and I just started dating we fought about everything, eventually we stopped worrying about the little things and just stopped talking about them. Problem solved.

So keep some stuff to yourself. If it's super-serious or anything like that it should probably be talked about, but otherwise secrets are fine.
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Leon
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Quote:
 
If it's super-serious or anything like that it should probably be talked about, but otherwise secrets are fine.

I suppose, perhaps, I should have been more clear. One of the instances above concerns an affair. D:
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