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Crystal Harris-Hefner thread. Crustal's, many faces, lies, failed career moves & infections.; Post that made us LOFAO!
Topic Started: Jul 7 2012, 11:37 AM (6,906 Views)
Teresa
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Crazyfan101

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Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: Mar 8, 2010 9:09 PM in response to: Teresa (; Reply


Posted Image




JOY2

Posts: 4,271
From: At Home
Registered: 10/18/09
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: Mar 8, 2010 9:47 PM in response to: Crazyfan101 Reply


bending over to take one for the team? lol




circe21

Posts: 8,620
Registered: 8/19/05
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: Mar 9, 2010 5:17 AM in response to: JOY2 Reply


First it was that teenage boy pop star and now it's cartoon characters...I guess Crystal is pretty desperate...

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Teresa
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Teresa (;

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Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: Mar 9, 2010 9:14 AM in response to: SassiAani Reply


> The fountain of youth...

In the world of the "Playboy Mansion" youth comes from all different sprays and squirts LOL ewwwwww




Vixxen

Posts: 4,509
Registered: 11/23/08
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: Mar 9, 2010 9:19 AM in response to: Teresa (; Reply


LMAO....ewwwwwwwwwwwwwww




Teresa (;

Posts: 8,244
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Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: Mar 11, 2010 7:07 AM in response to: Vixxen Reply


@crystalharris Just left MTV, they were so much fun. The show is VH1's "Undateable" about what makes a guy undatable its a 5 hour special airing soon!
about 17 hours ago via web
UNDATEABLE....WHAT A HOE...DATE AN 83 YEAR OLD PERVERT AND GIVE ADVICE ON WHAT MAKES A MAN UNDATEABLE! WTF CRUSTAL!!!




starmaker

Posts: 7,769
Registered: 12/4/08
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: Mar 11, 2010 7:19 AM in response to: Teresa (; Reply


i read that also, and was like are you even fcking kidding me, how the hellll is she giving advice after who she is sleeping with, what her advice should be is how to sleep with a rich old man, and shove all his former friends and people around him besides her and her mom and maybe one or two different ho's that you need to do your freaky bed shitttt with hef,, what a title!!!!




Teresa (;

Posts: 8,244
Registered: 11/16/09
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: Mar 11, 2010 7:33 AM in response to: starmaker Reply


ITA Anyone who has a daughter, please block the f in channel when it airs!




MomLovesTheGND

Posts: 3,300
Registered: 11/1/08
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: Mar 11, 2010 7:36 AM in response to: Teresa (; Reply


Heck block it from your sons too!!


MOM




starmaker

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Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: Mar 11, 2010 11:14 AM in response to: Teresa (; Reply


no kidding lol!




pinkjewel

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Registered: 6/22/09
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: Mar 11, 2010 12:42 PM in response to: starmaker Reply


No doubt Star. Rule number 1 in dating: DON'T DATE A DUDE WHO IS BOINKING OTHER CHICKS!! Rule #2: Don't date a dude that is going to die within the next few years.

What was this show thinking inviting her on??????




Oneredshoe

Posts: 76
Registered: 12/1/08
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: Mar 11, 2010 1:07 PM in response to: pinkjewel Reply


Well Crystal has chased off many girls away from the mansion. I think that makes Hef pretty undateable.. That and the fact that Crystal looks and acts like a creature from a sess pool.. Oh and that the urban dictionary version of sess pool.
Nobody wants to date a catty b-itch or a spoiled whiny old man..




starmaker

Posts: 7,769
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Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: Mar 12, 2010 9:31 AM in response to: pinkjewel Reply


well some bright producers once again from mtv, probably like 23 right out of college and want an invite to the mansion so they invited crystal, i am speculating but it sounds good to me lol, and i have also heard like a rattle snake crystal has gotten rid of many girls, hey this is one thing she has accomplished better than holly, she should be proud




YoGabba

Posts: 2,749
Registered: 9/28/09
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: Mar 13, 2010 5:37 AM in response to: starmaker Reply


> well some bright producers once again from mtv,
> probably like 23 right out of college and want an
> invite to the mansion so they invited crystal, i am
> speculating but it sounds good to me lol

Sounds about right to me too! Good speculation starmaker!




starmaker

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Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: Mar 13, 2010 6:41 AM in response to: YoGabba Reply


i know right lol!!!

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Teresa
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circe21

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Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: Apr 6, 2010 5:07 PM in response to: pinkjewel Reply


> Crystal is totally Rock of Love material. She and
> Brett could share extensions.
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Teresa
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Crazyfan101

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Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: Apr 7, 2010 9:57 PM in response to: wildchick86 Reply




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JOY2

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Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: Apr 9, 2010 3:38 AM in response to: bunnyluv Reply


she is the perfect hefmate......lil' miss stepford, duck lips and all.




pdub4

Posts: 5,164
Registered: 2/20/09
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: Apr 9, 2010 4:43 AM in response to: starmaker Reply


Don't forget Linsanity! That would be the greatest album ever!


Hef probably is letting her record this cause he's already got someone waiting in the wings




Teresa (;

Posts: 8,244
Registered: 11/16/09
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: Apr 9, 2010 6:41 AM in response to: wildchick86 Reply


> Her song will be worse than RHOA Kim Zolciak singing
> "Don't Be Tardy for the Party"


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Teresa
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Crazyfan101

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Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: Apr 10, 2010 7:11 PM in response to: starmaker




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teresa
Jul 7 2012, 03:29 PM
Crazyfan101

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Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: Apr 10, 2010 7:11 PM in response to: starmaker




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circe21

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Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: Apr 11, 2010 6:33 AM in response to: jogger Reply




Such a weird pic...
Claire looks like one of the Campbell's Soup Kids, Anna looks miserable, Hef looks awful, Crystal looks like a drag queen, and Kimberly looks like she's wearing maternity clothes...what a motley crew...
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Teresa
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JOY2

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Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: Apr 13, 2010 3:59 PM in response to: Teresa (; Reply


Posted Image




circe21

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Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: Apr 13, 2010 4:28 PM in response to: JOY2 Reply


LOL!!! OMG she does look like Kim Z!!!!!!
That is hilarious!!!

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Teresa
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Teresa (;

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Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: Apr 23, 2010 4:18 AM in response to: starmaker Reply






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Pinky's links are NSFW!! Warning: Crustal needed to tuck!!:O




Posts: 7,893
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Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: Apr 23, 2010 5:00 PM in response to: circe21 Reply


I wonder if Crusty still poses like this for Hef:
NSFW!!!!!
http://www.lettherebeporn.com/galleries/2008/12/crystal_carter/crystal_carter_009.php




pinkjewel

Posts: 7,893
Registered: 6/22/09
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: Apr 23, 2010 5:03 PM in response to: pinkjewel Reply


AND, I wonder if she got her cutlets removed during her surgeries. I though Hef didn't like girls with their cutlets hanging out. NSFW!!
http://www.nsfwceleb.com/2009/01/07/crystal-carter-is-hugh-hefners-new-girlfriend/10437jp-8914/




pinkjewel

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Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: Apr 23, 2010 5:05 PM in response to: pinkjewel Reply


And here she is in that cheap Wallmart red thing!!! LOL Her head looks MASSIVE here, wow.
NSFW
http://www.girlsupdates.com/pictures/crystal_carter_350_11.html

http://www.girlsupdates.com/pictures/crystal_carter_350_16.html




YoGabba

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Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: Apr 23, 2010 6:35 PM in response to: circe21 Reply


> Yep. And Crystal looks almost as old as Cher!!!

I said the same thing!




YoGabba

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Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: Apr 23, 2010 6:39 PM in response to: pinkjewel Reply


> And here she is in that cheap Wallmart red thing!!!
> LOL Her head looks MASSIVE here, wow.
> NSFW

That tacky top never fails to crack me up. What's awesome is that she saved it, altered it, and wore it on Super Bowl Sunday years later.lol, I love it.




Modo 3

Posts: 663
Registered: 3/1/09
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: Apr 23, 2010 7:02 PM in response to: YoGabba Reply


OMG! I do believe it is the same top..Crystal is being green and saving the planet¡!! Good for her..hahahaha.1




pinkjewel

Posts: 7,893
Registered: 6/22/09
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: Apr 23, 2010 8:54 PM in response to: Modo 3 Reply


HAHAHAHA!!! Both you and YOG crack me up!!! I've saved some tacky clothers over the years but this top/teddy/negligee/polyester nightmare takes the cake!!!! I'm surprized her jumbo p0rno boobs still fit in it!!




flossygirl

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Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: Apr 23, 2010 9:19 PM in response to: pinkjewel Reply


Geezus, in that nude pic she looks like she has a hint of a penis! That's not right....




pinkjewel

Posts: 7,893
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Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: Apr 23, 2010 9:34 PM in response to: flossygirl Reply


LMAO... you mean her scallop? She should tuck that thing back in.


Edited by Teresa, Jul 7 2012, 03:47 PM.
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Teresa
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pinkjewel

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Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: Apr 23, 2010 9:41 PM in response to: pinkjewel Reply


LMFAO...Look at her head in this pic!!! Did she get a head reduction recently? MAn , this is one big head
It looks like someone cut it and pasted it on the back of her body!! No wonder they never called her back for PM back then, these pics are SCARY

Posted Image




flossygirl

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Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: Apr 23, 2010 9:42 PM in response to: pinkjewel Reply


Man that's scary, I enlarged it on my iPhone - BIG mistake! Yikes.




pinkjewel

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Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: Apr 23, 2010 9:43 PM in response to: flossygirl Reply


Sorry! I should have warned you




flossygirl

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Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: Apr 23, 2010 9:45 PM in response to: flossygirl Reply


I enlarged the pic of her crotch I mean, but that heads scary too. It doesn't look at all like her any more.




Modo 3

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Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: Apr 23, 2010 9:55 PM in response to: flossygirl Reply


Those old pics do need a warning b4 viewing.


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Teresa (;

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Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: Apr 24, 2010 10:23 AM in response to: pinkjewel Reply






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Teresa
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Teresa (;

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Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: Apr 24, 2010 1:28 PM in response to: Teresa (; Reply


@crustalharris @hughhefner and I acting goofy on his bday~ http://twitpic.com/1i49lv
about 2 hours ago via Twitpic
Reply Retweet

I thought Crustal's donkey mouth, skanky underwear, lollipop's and a dead looking pervert was part of her everyday life! WTF


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JOY2

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Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: Apr 27, 2010 3:47 PM in response to: Teresa (; Reply


this was on the kendra board.....crystal looks upset about kendra and hef, also she looks very old in this pix....i thot it was mum at first. thnx to whoever posted it first






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Crazyfan101

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Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: Apr 27, 2010 5:20 PM in response to: Teresa (; Reply


Oh well, we'll just keep posting our pics and links over and over if we have to LOL




Malindak2

Posts: 2,338
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Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: Apr 27, 2010 8:15 PM in response to: Teresa (; Reply


> I think it's freaking hilarious she is wearing the
> same dress she had on last night! Is anyone else
> finding humor in this lmfao!! Playboy is broke!!

I do! I do! Isn't that a big no no in Hollywood. ESP Beverly Hills?!

Too funny! Hef should have used that 900,000 to buy Crystal a closet full of clothes.




YoGabba

Posts: 2,749
Registered: 9/28/09
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: Apr 27, 2010 9:26 PM in response to: Malindak2 Reply


> > I think it's freaking hilarious she is wearing the
> > same dress she had on last night! Is anyone else
> > finding humor in this lmfao!! Playboy is broke!!
>
> I do! I do! Isn't that a big no no in Hollywood. ESP
> Beverly Hills?!

Me three! It's one thing if you're just wearing it to lunch or something, but to be on a red carpet with the dress you just wore on national tv? lol. I wish she'd wear that walmart red top on an episode this year. Fingers crossed!




jogger

Posts: 1,717
Registered: 8/10/09
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: Apr 28, 2010 1:51 AM in response to: starmaker Reply


> some one is a hacker, really girls big surprise?
> especially you crazy who can probably hack yourself,
> come on......

Oh great now we have a hacker?




jogger

Posts: 1,717
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Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: Apr 28, 2010 1:59 AM in response to: YoGabba Reply


> > > I think it's freaking hilarious she is wearing
> the
> > > same dress she had on last night! Is anyone else
> > > finding humor in this lmfao!! Playboy is broke!!
> >
> > I do! I do! Isn't that a big no no in Hollywood.
> ESP
> > Beverly Hills?!
>
> Me three! It's one thing if you're just wearing it to
> lunch or something, but to be on a red carpet with
> the dress you just wore on national tv? lol. I wish
> she'd wear that walmart red top on an episode this
> year. Fingers crossed!

Crusty's a walking advertisement for Wal-mart but on the red carpet too?Haha.




jogger

Posts: 1,717
Registered: 8/10/09
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: Apr 28, 2010 2:00 AM in response to: JOY2 Reply


> > Um, I posted this pic on the Kendra board......but
> I
> > can't find it either. I thought I had posted it
> on
> > the episode 6 thread....how did you find it?
>
> i don't know ,just started reading the posts and
> quickly started reposting it...thnx so much cos i've
> had a ton of fun with it

I'm so glad you posted that picture since someone hacked it or whacked it off from where Crazyfan101 posted it. Was it the Queen of Romper Room? I agree that posting unflattering pictures of Crusty are fun and isn't that the reason we come to this forum?

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Teresa
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circe21

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Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 1, 2010 12:23 PM in response to: dawnberlan Reply


Maybe you saw it on the rack at Wal-Mart?




Bobmarley

Posts: 1,700
Registered: 5/12/09
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 1, 2010 7:00 PM in response to: circe21 Reply


SOUNDS like a no-brainer . . . what DOES a gorgeous 24-year-old from West Bromwich see in wrinkly 84-year-old Playboy multi-millionaire Hugh Hefner?

24-year-old model Crystal Harris tells of her REAL love for Playboy tycoon Hugh Hefner



PLAYTIME: Hugh has Crystal in bed by 11But stunning blonde Crystal Harris DOES have brains, a university education, and insists: "I'm NO gold digger and I'm NOT interested in his money. I LOVE him!"


In an exclusive interview with the News of the World, Crystal reveals her life in the £10 million Playboy mansion - and tells how a Black Country publican's daughter saw off the Hollywood sex king's harem and is preparing to become wife No 3.


When a pensioner of 84 falls head over heels it usually means a trip to A & E and a new walking frame. But for legendary lothario Hef it's a new bedtime playmate. And no, that's not tinnitus. . . it's the sound of wedding bells!


Wannabe pop star Crystal is so insistent Hugh's £27million fortune is NOT her target, she vowed: "I'd sign a pre-nuptial agreement. Hugh doesn't throw money at me at all and I don't ask. I get paid for my music work and modelling.


"Hugh has been hinting at a wedding but I'm not pushy. His ex, Holly Madison, was pushing for marriage, but I won't.


"I'd love to go up the aisle, but it would be the only wedding where all the guests - his exes and Playmates - would be vying to outshine the bride.


"I'm used to that already - on Sundays when the Playmates come over, dressed up to the nines, desperate to get his attention. But I roll out in sweat pants, T-shirt and no make-up.


"Hugh just looks over at me and rolls his eyes at some of them. We're like a normal married couple."


Two weeks ago we revealed how Hef was ready to settle down with "special lady" Crystal. But she is the most unlikely Playboy Playmate.


Crystal grew up in Ye Olde Rose and Crown, just a ball's throw from West Bromwich Albion's Hawthorns ground. All her family are fans of the Baggies, just promoted back to the Premier League.


It's there she first got a taste for showbiz. "My dad used to perform for the drinkers and I'd sing along with him," she laughed. "My mum says it's in my genes and that's why I'm now embarking on a career in music."


The family moved to a new life in America when Crystal was a schoolgirl and finally settled in San Diego, California, when she was 10. Sadly, her father died a year later from cancer.


As a psychology student Crystal started to do the odd modelling job and first met Hef in October 2008 at his annual Hallowe'en party in the mansion.

"I dressed as a French maid," she said "I spotted Hef by his cabana at the pool so I waved, blew him a kiss and he waved me over. We immediately hit it off. He talked about his psychology degree and after a few hours he asked me to stay for the weekend.


"After I drove home, he called me up and said, 'Hi, this is Hugh Hefner. I dunno how you feel about this - but would you like to move in with me?' I just said yes, as I thought it was a dream. I quit university and packed my stuff."


Eighteen months later Crystal is still there. And she has learned all the secrets of Hugh's amazing life, bedding more than 2,000 women, including movie stars and cover girls, and destroying the evidence to spare their blushes. "I've asked him all about his past," she said. "He even confessed which lovers he made sex tapes with. Some date so far back that they were filmed in 8mm!



"But he had them all dumped in the ocean years ago because he didn't want anyone's career to be hurt.


"He was worried they'd be stolen from his library during one of the parties."


More than 900 beauties have revealed all in Playboy, including Baywatch's Pamela Anderson, who has been close pals with Hef since the Eighties and holds the record for the most cover girl appearances.


"When I asked Hugh which cover girls he's slept with even I was shocked by some of the names," confessed Crystal.


"They were the ones you'd never suspect, the ones who seem so innocent. There are a couple of Brits, but if I told you he wouldn't be happy. It's our secret.


"But he told me he DIDN'T sleep with Pammie, although he WANTED to. He said it was 'bad timing' as he was married and she was in a relationship.


"I'm not jealous of those girls then or even those who still surround him. I love being surrounded by all these hot girls too. When he had seven girlfriends at once he said he had to downsize. They got too catty and fought over him."


Despite his age, Hugh still takes Crystal and her 34DD bust to bed every night. "We always sleep together," she insisted. "Hef's libido and image have been a big part of his whole life.


"He's very intimate and knows what a woman wants and needs. I don't want to offend him by detailing how many times a night we do it. But we're great companions. He's a great kisser, and quite romantic - there's nothing better than waking up in the morning next to him.


"We love to cuddle up on the sofa just watching an old movie in our flannel pyjamas. I wear pink and his are blue.


"We're like an old married couple already. . . although I don't see him as old at all," she adds hastily. "Hef acts like a goofy, silly kid who never grew up. Despite our age difference I'm actually the older, more sensible one."


Last year Hef committed solely to Crystal by kicking out his twin girlfriends Kristina and Karissa Shannon, who were part of his Girls Next Door global hit TV series. "They weren't really there for him," said Crystal. "The twins were a lot of fun but I could tell it's not what they wanted.


"They didn't act like our family and they wanted to use the show as a springboard for fame." Crystal revealed she has tried to drag the octogenarian out of old-fashioned ways and into the 21st Century. "Hef has no mobile phone, email or internet," she said. "I have to help him look at stories online about us.


"I tried to get him more internet-savvy by buying him an iPad, but he still hasn't figured how to turn it on. He doesn't even use a computer for his files. Instead every Saturday he works on his scrapbook, filing reports about what's in the media and photos and notes of our nights in. He has over 2,000 of those books chronicling his life."


Crystal, who still has relatives in south London and wants Hugh to fly her over in his private jet for a visit, hit back at recent reports suggesting dad-of-two Hugh has suffered a string of health issues in recent month.


"He's in excellent health," she said. "It amazes me how much energy he has. He had a stroke in the Eighties but he's very sprightly. He has amazing genetics and looks like he's in his fifties."


And Crystal revealed pensioner Hef enjoys the most expensive meals- on-wheels service in the world.


"Whenever we go out for dinner, or travel around the world, Hef's own chefs pre-cook all his food," she said. "I always order from the menu, but he sticks with his own meals.


"He's very picky. Every day he eats the same food. Scrambled egg, bacon and toast for breakfast, in the afternoon chicken noodle soup, and a slice of apple pie with ice cream at night. His life is totally planned - up at 9.30am most days and in bed at 11pm, except when there are parties."


Dedicated Hef built his fortune from scratch with his publishing empire, Playboy clubs and Bunny girls. And he still works most days, with regular evening playtime routines. Mondays are "guys nights" with business associates, playing cards or watching TV.


The next two days he holds court with Playmates, who stay at a separate house across the street, and then another small-stakes card game.


Hef keeps Thursdays free for dinner dates, parties or surprise trips with his lover. Fridays and Saturdays Crystal and Hef always settle down for a classic movie at his private cinema.


And on Sundays the Playmates gather to strip off and sunbathe around his pool while Hef plays backgammon with pals. Apparently he has given up swimming to the grotto - the infamous cavern in the pool where anything goes.


At night he watches the latest movies with pals like Kiss singer Gene Simmons, comic Bill Cosby and screen star Jamie Foxx.


"They love to hang out with him and the girls," said Crystal, who has recently secured a £12m seven- album deal with Org- anica Music Group. London-born producer Michael Blakey signed her after seeing her sing on TV in The Girls Next Door.


She said: "When I told Hef about the deal he cried. He's 100 per cent supportive. He kind of likes my demos, although it's not his style. He loves the provocative lyrics though, as he's such a sexually charged man."


Blakey said: "Crystal has an incredible natural talent. I foresee huge things. . . "




Bobmarley

Posts: 1,700
Registered: 5/12/09
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 1, 2010 7:02 PM in response to: Bobmarley Reply


sh!t sorry thats long lol

check it out at (has video too but im not bothering listening - itll be her usual drool about cr@p):

http://www.newsoftheworld.co.uk/news/801126/Model-Crystal-Harris-says-shes-not-interested-in-Playboy-legend-Hugh-Hefners-money.html




Bobmarley

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Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 1, 2010 7:04 PM in response to: Bobmarley Reply


and any who of COURSE any girl will say im not after his money.. that would be the one thing every girlfriend has ever said!!! do they really think she is going to sit in an interview and make her self not look perfect?!

and was i reading right (sorry i just scimmed it got very bored) about the recording contract?? S E V E N albums WHAT THE F**K!!!!!!!

and funny what she admitted about the twins etc.. when wasnt it all supose to be a happy family and they left on good terms? - how good can that be when theyre still representing playboy and shes saying this to the media (even tho we all know it..)




Bobmarley

Posts: 1,700
Registered: 5/12/09
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 1, 2010 7:07 PM in response to: Souleone Reply


and for the record so its obvious were not just "five critics on the board that e! listen too.." (sorry cant remember the words lol) first comments on the article are:

1. I think I feel sick.

2. Of course she's not interested in his money, she's interested in the public exposure his money gives him.

If she was any more airbrushed she'd need a software patent.

3. HAHAHAHA west bromwich town is soo bad you will date a 84-year-old to get out.

and considering no ones mentioned it here yet it clearly wasnt us cause im sure some one would be throwing up about it here !!

haha LOVE the airbrushing / software patent comment!!!!!




dawnberlan

Posts: 174
Registered: 2/19/10
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 1, 2010 9:07 PM in response to: circe21 Reply


> Maybe you saw it on the rack at Wal-Mart?

Doubt it...I don't shop there.




Bobmarley

Posts: 1,700
Registered: 5/12/09
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 1, 2010 9:56 PM in response to: Bobmarley Reply


AND the "big happy family that are all friends".. well she blew that one out the window ******** about the other playmates turning up dressed trying to impress to get somewhere etc while she is there in trackies n no make up..

wow shes starting to show a few of her real colours by sh1tting on anyone thats ever helped her..




JOY2

Posts: 4,271
From: At Home
Registered: 10/18/09
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 2, 2010 3:30 AM in response to: Bobmarley Reply


transfering this from fans side where i accidently posted it
hahahahahaha.....st.ourlady of full-of-sh!t.
"Hugh has been hinting at a wedding but I'm not pushy. His ex, Holly Madison, was pushing for marriage, but I won't.
......oh she's not a snarky biitch at all.lol

But she is the most unlikely Playboy Playmate.
......we know this.lol


It's there she first got a taste for showbiz. "My dad used to perform for the drinkers and I'd sing along with him," she laughed. "My mum says it's in my genes and that's why I'm now embarking on a career in music."
.........she's got the hoe'ing gene too.

As a psychology student Crystal started to do the odd modelling job and first met Hef in October 2008 at his annual Hallowe'en party in the mansion.
.......never graduated cos she majored in plotting to meet hef.

"After I drove home, he called me up and said, 'Hi, this is Hugh Hefner. I dunno how you feel about this - but would you like to move in with me?' I just said yes, as I thought it was a dream. I quit university and packed my stuff."
......oh oh, she left out the hefty bags cos she doesn't want his money.hahaha

But he told me he DIDN'T sleep with Pammie, although he WANTED to. He said it was 'bad timing' as he was married and she was in a relationship.
.........hahaha, pam was never that desperate, and we all know hef's girls come from desperate attraction.

Blakey said: "Crystal has an incredible natural talent. I foresee huge things.
.........poor blakey hasn't seen her huge hanging things.lol

can't wait to hear what other's have to say about this article.......this made me laugh,thnx bobmarley




JOY2

Posts: 4,271
From: At Home
Registered: 10/18/09
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 2, 2010 3:31 AM in response to: Bobmarley Reply


hahahahahahahahaha, more good laughs bob,thnx.




bugsie

Posts: 1,649
Registered: 9/9/09
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 2, 2010 5:26 AM in response to: Bobmarley Reply


WHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA Bob alla this shiit is 2 funni! CrustHO aka HeftyBag HO is such a sucking liar




dawnberlan

Posts: 174
Registered: 2/19/10
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 2, 2010 6:05 AM in response to: JOY2 Reply


I liked where she dissed the twins. That was funny. Yup, her true colors are shining through, now!




pdub4

Posts: 5,164
Registered: 2/20/09
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 2, 2010 6:17 AM in response to: Bobmarley Reply


Oh BARF. That story makes me sick to my stomach. Was it dripping in fakeness for anyone else????
Next time please post a warning




pdub4

Posts: 5,164
Registered: 2/20/09
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 2, 2010 6:21 AM in response to: dawnberlan Reply


> I liked where she dissed the twins. That was funny.
> Yup, her true colors are shining through, now!

Exactly




circe21

Posts: 8,620
Registered: 8/19/05
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 2, 2010 6:57 AM in response to: Bobmarley Reply


LOL!!! She TOTALLY trashed the Twins!!!




Demigoddess

Posts: 1,155
Registered: 12/25/06
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 2, 2010 8:45 AM in response to: Bobmarley Reply


I have to ask - has any girlfriend/Playmate attempted a pop career? Oh, I think Monica Leigh did. She did one auto-tuned dance song - it's on iTunes. Anyone else? Crusty may be the first girlfriend to do this...

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Vixxen

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Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 2, 2010 8:54 AM in response to: Bobmarley Reply


I am just shaking my head at this...Crystal is SUCH a liar it's unreal...




pdub4

Posts: 5,164
Registered: 2/20/09
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 2, 2010 9:00 AM in response to: Demigoddess Reply


No. Barbi Benton also attempted a music career.




dawnberlan

Posts: 174
Registered: 2/19/10
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 2, 2010 11:30 AM in response to: pdub4 Reply


I think a few of her songs were successful.




Crazyfan101

Posts: 9,048
Registered: 2/25/09
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 2, 2010 11:36 AM in response to: pdub4 Reply


Gross, she said Hef's a great kisser?? Do they really have full on makeout sessions?

......and then the sex, ewwwwwwwwww!!!!!!!




Demigoddess

Posts: 1,155
Registered: 12/25/06
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 2, 2010 12:18 PM in response to: pdub4 Reply


Oh right - I totally forgot - Barbi attempted a career in country music. Thanks guys.




Souleone

Posts: 4,482
Registered: 5/13/07
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 2, 2010 12:40 PM in response to: Crazyfan101 Reply


Yeah that part made me almost throw up in my mouth a little! Maybe THAT's why she is so overly thin, just the thought of Hef's old, wrinkly bålls and dementor's soul-sucking mouth makes my appetite go away. I can't imagine actually seeing, touching and kissing him. EW!

And the thinly-veild snarks show her fakeness is starting to shine through. That whole article was as Pdub put it, dripping with fakeness. Who does she think she's fooling? If he was Hugh Hefner, retired tank mechanic living in the 55+ trailer park she wouldn't give him the time of day. Oh, and what happened to all sickening "we're all like sisters!" talk she used to do with the twins. Nice way to show your true colors Crystal!

Oh and let's not forget that Crystal herself admitted on the E! boards that she posed as a cyber girl because she was trying to "catch Hef's eye" she always now makes it seem like she just so happened to be at the party and she just so happened to catch Hef's eye. It's sooooo convenient that any post she herself made with regards to anything to how she met Hef and other things have majickally disappeared. POOF. So sad, because there were some wonderful gems that she slipped back then!




pinkjewel

Posts: 7,893
Registered: 6/22/09
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 2, 2010 12:45 PM in response to: Souleone Reply


She is such a liar. On her Myspace, she says she is a college graduate. What HASN"T she lied about???




MomLovesTheGND

Posts: 3,300
Registered: 11/1/08
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 2, 2010 1:05 PM in response to: Demigoddess Reply


Barbi Benton attempted a music career and had two hit singles through it has been said Hef paid to make them hits..Who knows maybe he did?


Mom



bugsie

Posts: 1,649
Registered: 9/9/09
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 2, 2010 5:31 PM in response to: MomLovesTheGND Reply


Bent nose & rubber lips eating taco & Check out tha crows feet on her right eye

Posted Image


xlipgl0ssx

Posts: 75
Registered: 3/20/07
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 2, 2010 5:42 PM in response to: bugsie Reply


She honestly gets more and more like Cristal Camden everyday.

Also she seems to be really quite skinny in this picture. Unless it is just because her head is so big she looks so small...




bugsie

Posts: 1,649
Registered: 9/9/09
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 2, 2010 5:57 PM in response to: xlipgl0ssx Reply


Big head & fish tacos




Modo 3

Posts: 663
Registered: 3/1/09
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 2, 2010 8:39 PM in response to: xlipgl0ssx Reply


This is so true, she is vanishing.

> She honestly gets more and more like Cristal Camden
> everyday.
>
> Also she seems to be really quite skinny in this
> picture. Unless it is just because her head is so big
> she looks so small...




Modo 3

Posts: 663
Registered: 3/1/09
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 2, 2010 8:42 PM in response to: Bobmarley Reply


This interview is totally tacky and vindictative, Crystal was so stupid to give it, she sounds like she is the one ready to write the tell all book. I bet this interview burn alot of bridges for her, oh well her bad choice.




MMA050

Posts: 3,366
Registered: 7/29/09
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 2, 2010 9:06 PM in response to: Crazyfan101 Reply


> Gross, she said Hef's a great kisser?? Do they
> really have full on makeout sessions?
>
> ......and then the sex, ewwwwwwwwww!!!!!!!

Ewe, I bet his breath stinks! Lol.




MMA050

Posts: 3,366
Registered: 7/29/09
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 2, 2010 9:11 PM in response to: circe21 Reply


> LOL!!! She TOTALLY trashed the Twins!!!

Yep, I wonder if they will start trashing her back now. She would so deserve it! As for not being a gold digger, well, how does she get money to but tampons, and thongs, and make up, and perfume? Afterall, she doesn't have a job, so how is she surviving? Inquiry minds wants to know.









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Malindak2

Posts: 2,338
Registered: 3/1/09
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 2, 2010 10:10 PM in response to: MMA050 Reply


Does she get a grand a week from hef? Paid to be his gf? Because it's love, after all. She wouldn't take it, right.




Bobmarley

Posts: 1,700
Registered: 5/12/09
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 3, 2010 1:06 AM in response to: Malindak2 Reply


right but shes not getting the money if u ask her..!!

oh yes i hope the girls all retaliate, how can they not??

and yes it made me want to vomit too i couldnt even read it was too boring..

so she thinks shes come out all sweet but **** she has just opened her mouth a bit much ! lol just think what shes like in real life if this is what comes out of her mouth when shes tryna suck up and be perfect!!

hmmmm i thought hef did sleep with pammy?




circe21

Posts: 8,620
Registered: 8/19/05
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 3, 2010 5:24 AM in response to: Modo 3 Reply


> This interview is totally tacky and vindictative,
> Crystal was so stupid to give it, she sounds like she
> is the one ready to write the tell all book. I bet
> this interview burn alot of bridges for her, oh well
> her bad choice.

ITA. It's horrible. And she totally comes across as a self-promoting gold digger, IMHO.




circe21

Posts: 8,620
Registered: 8/19/05
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 3, 2010 5:25 AM in response to: bugsie Reply


HOLY CR@P!!! She looks like an ALIEN!!! LOLOLOL!!!




pdub4

Posts: 5,164
Registered: 2/20/09
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 3, 2010 7:38 AM in response to: Bobmarley Reply


>
> hmmmm i thought hef did sleep with pammy?

That's what I thought too, but we all know by now she's got a little honesty problem.




circe21

Posts: 8,620
Registered: 8/19/05
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 3, 2010 8:51 AM in response to: pdub4 Reply


>
> That's what I thought too, but we all know by now
> she's got a little honesty problem.

Who? Crystal or Pammy? LOL




starmaker

Posts: 7,769
Registered: 12/4/08
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 4, 2010 4:12 AM in response to: Crazyfan101 Reply


the kissing part is the one that makes me want to blow chunks, yuck!!!!




Vixxen

Posts: 4,509
Registered: 11/23/08
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 4, 2010 10:48 AM in response to: pdub4 Reply


Pammy did sleep with Hef as appreciation for being put on the PB cover a few times ....Pammy is also sleeping with her dancing partner from DWTS....Pammy sleeps with anything (and I'm also including women)




pinkjewel

Posts: 7,893
Registered: 6/22/09
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 4, 2010 11:05 AM in response to: Vixxen Reply


I never knew she slept with Hef. Not that I'm surprised. SHe look horrible these days. She use to be so beautiful. She looks like an alcoholic to me.




Vixxen

Posts: 4,509
Registered: 11/23/08
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 4, 2010 11:26 AM in response to: pinkjewel Reply


NSFW...

http://seriouslyomg.com/?p=9721




pinkjewel

Posts: 7,893
Registered: 6/22/09
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 4, 2010 11:50 AM in response to: Vixxen Reply


That whole scene was so awkward. Did you see Hef's hair?? OMG..LOL.. Pam seemed totally messed up. Did she sleep with him that night?




Vixxen

Posts: 4,509
Registered: 11/23/08
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 4, 2010 11:51 AM in response to: pinkjewel Reply


lol I don't know but by the way she was practically licking his face, how could she have not slept with that old buzzard?




pinkjewel

Posts: 7,893
Registered: 6/22/09
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 4, 2010 12:29 PM in response to: Vixxen Reply


EWW he does look like an old buzzard!! I thought Hef gets pizzed off when people touch his hair? I guess Pam can do no wrong in his eyes.




shortattspan

Posts: 799
Registered: 2/5/06
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 4, 2010 5:42 PM in response to: Bobmarley Reply


"They love to hang out with him and the girls," said Crystal, who has recently secured a £12m seven- album deal with Org- anica Music Group. London-born producer Michael Blakey signed her after seeing her sing on TV in The Girls Next Door.

That is just beyond amazing-unleashing 7 crystal albums on the world!Probably millions of actually talented people will never be heard and she gets a deal like that?BS




shortattspan

Posts: 799
Registered: 2/5/06
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 4, 2010 5:51 PM in response to: MMA050 Reply


> > LOL!!! She TOTALLY trashed the Twins!!!
>
> Yep, I wonder if they will start trashing her back
> now. She would so deserve it! As for not being a
> gold digger, well, how does she get money to but
> tampons, and thongs, and make up, and perfume?
> Afterall, she doesn't have a job, so how is she
> e surviving? Inquiry minds wants to know.

Didn't she make $10 an hour in the musty scrap-booking room? Plus $1000. weekly for sleeping with the musty ol' man.

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pinkjewel

Posts: 7,893
Registered: 6/22/09
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 4, 2010 5:56 PM in response to: shortattspan Reply


YIKES, $1,000 an hour wouldn't be enough money to cuddle up to him. I've heard he smells bad and spits his food out all over the place when he eats. Not to mention he rips old man f@rts all the time..YUCKKKK




shortattspan

Posts: 799
Registered: 2/5/06
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 4, 2010 5:57 PM in response to: bugsie Reply


> Bent nose & rubber lips eating taco & Check out tha
> crows feet on her right eye
> > src="http://i39.tinypic.com/fk8675.jpg" border="0"
> alt="Image and video hosting by TinyPic">

This picture reminds me of one thing-Witchie-poo from H.R. Pufinstuff.




wildchick86

Posts: 5,718
From: Rockville
Registered: 3/22/06
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 4, 2010 6:44 PM in response to: Vixxen Reply


my eyes are burning from seeing Pam Anderson naked. yuck!




JOY2

Posts: 4,271
From: At Home
Registered: 10/18/09
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 5, 2010 4:09 AM in response to: Souleone Reply


crystal was pretty quiet on kendra's show.......i hope this is a sign of things to come for crystal's tv career.




starmaker

Posts: 7,769
Registered: 12/4/08
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 5, 2010 4:32 AM in response to: JOY2 Reply


i thought the same thing joy, i found her to have no personality , at first i saw anna, and didn't even notice crystal, that is a pure example why crystal could not carry a show, no one really notices her, she is not a stand out, she is a blender




circe21

Posts: 8,620
Registered: 8/19/05
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 5, 2010 9:19 AM in response to: JOY2 Reply


> crystal was pretty quiet on kendra's show.......i
> hope this is a sign of things to come for crystal's
> tv career.

And at one point, she looked totally zoned out.
She has absolutely zero personality and zero on-camera appeal, IMHO.
Probably why they decided to go in a "fun new direction" on GND by featuring Tweedles Dum and Dee and the PM house antics.




starmaker

Posts: 7,769
Registered: 12/4/08
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 5, 2010 10:57 AM in response to: circe21 Reply


so true circe




pdub4

Posts: 5,164
Registered: 2/20/09
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 5, 2010 11:05 AM in response to: circe21 Reply


Maybe too much of that mansion specialty Adderall or whatever it's called?




pinkjewel

Posts: 7,893
Registered: 6/22/09
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 5, 2010 1:45 PM in response to: pdub4 Reply


Yes, she and Alexis Neirs (pretty wild) BOTH have that spaced out hazeed look in their eyes and that is the result of too much adderall!!!




starmaker

Posts: 7,769
Registered: 12/4/08
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 5, 2010 1:47 PM in response to: pdub4 Reply


the diet pill of the mansion you mean lol




jogger

Posts: 1,717
Registered: 8/10/09
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 5, 2010 10:17 PM in response to: circe21 Reply


> > crystal was pretty quiet on kendra's show.......i
> > hope this is a sign of things to come for
> crystal's
> > tv career.
>
> And at one point, she looked totally zoned out.
> She has absolutely zero personality and zero
> on-camera appeal, IMHO.
> Probably why they decided to go in a "fun new
> direction" on GND by featuring Tweedles Dum and Dee
> and the PM house antics.

She was just there to agree with Hef during the whole for ratings and drama of the sex talk. Dirty sex talks worked on GND but not so much on Kendra in a four way sex talk with the ex,new hubs and new #1. The diet drug probably helps her[Crusty] zone out since she has to handle the old man all alone now for the most part.

Her=Crusty
Message was edited by:
jogger




JOY2

Posts: 4,271
From: At Home
Registered: 10/18/09
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 6, 2010 3:14 AM in response to: starmaker Reply


she's like a wind up toy......i wonder what will happen when she snaps out of her fog. by then she'll be married so at least it will be a good payday for crystal, she'll need the money cos she won't get far without hef.




JOY2

Posts: 4,271
From: At Home
Registered: 10/18/09
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 6, 2010 3:16 AM in response to: circe21 Reply


> > crystal was pretty quiet on kendra's show.......i
> > hope this is a sign of things to come for
> crystal's
> > tv career.
>
> And at one point, she looked totally zoned out.
> She has absolutely zero personality and zero
> on-camera appeal, IMHO.
> Probably why they decided to go in a "fun new
> direction" on GND by featuring Tweedles Dum and Dee
> and the PM house antics.

yea, she's zoned out ........the fun new direction could not possibly be cystal.lol


Teresa (;

Posts: 8,244
Registered: 11/16/09
Re: Crystal Harris-Hefner thread
Posted: May 6, 2010 6:07 AM in response to: JOY2 Reply

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