| Leon Corbin and Jun Mazuki | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: Feb 10 2013, 01:19 PM (170 Views) | |
| Bobbie Hearst | Feb 10 2013, 01:19 PM Post #1 |
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One Rp per team member. Tournament Deadline: Thursday, February 28th, 2013 |
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| braveswordmachine | Mar 1 2013, 08:58 PM Post #2 |
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The Warehouse. Fans of Code Red Wrestling will recognize it, from the handful of appearances it’s made in The Penis Pope‘s previous promos, it has several different sections to it, one resembles the Super Ethical Reality Climax portion of Saints Row The Third with a mini-maze and different obstacles used for breaking up training, a section where there’s an actual high scale gym set up in a corner, although some of the weighs seem a bit unorthodox, there’s even a practice ring set up. It’s a catch-all facility where Jun Mazuki, The Cock That Roars, spends his time living when he’s not on set at his newest Pornduction, or traveling around the world being the magnificent showman that he is. Currently, The PornStarro is relaxing, he’s sitting spread eagle in a massive oversized bean-bag chair known as a LoveSac, it’s a little ol’place where people get together. He's decked out in a Roaring Cock T-shirt because Jun's got bills to pay and you should buy one, no, two for everyone in your family and on his face are his ever present Bret Hart style wrap-around pink-mirrored shades. Jun Mazuki: Greetings people from other feds who don’t know about Jun! Jun will have you know that Jun is a fun-loving guy, Jun is a complete professional, and occasionally, this is only every once in awhile Jun has been known to show explicit material in Jun’s promos. Like right now he’s getting head from a slender blonde girl of questionable age, for Jun’s Jailbait Jamboree 7. Jun warned you. Voice Off-screen: Don’t worry people, I’m sure that’ll be the only time it happens! The camera pans away from the fellatio to show a stout looking man dressed in a colorful Hawaiian shirt and some tan shorts with several rubber-bands tied up in his burly unkempt beard. The Voices of The Film Crew in Unison: Cap’n Kilroy! That’s right, Cap’n Kilroy, The Man With The Plan, the Un-Stable’s own Norm Peterson as evidenced by the unison shouting of his name when he appears. Cap’n Kilroy: Just look at this man, he’s five-feet nine inches of pure animal magnetism, shoulders that Atlas himself would envy, legs that would make Hercules’ take a step back, arms the size of a regular man’s head. Jun Mazuki: You are leaving out Jun’s most impressive feature. Cap’n Kilroy: I’m not going to talk about your junk, Jun. Jun’s Junk is pretty impressive, there’s a reason he was called Louisville Slugger in high school and he didn’t even play baseball. Cap’n Kilroy: I’ve traveled with this man, I’ve competed against this man, I’ve stared into his eyes and I’ve seen the Noid staring back. Jun Mazuki: Jun told you Cap’n-kun. Jun just really needed a sandwich, Jun wasn’t staring into the void. Cap’n Kilroy: I know what I saw! And it was The Noid! Jun raises up his shades and looks right at the Good Captain. Jun Mazuki: Did you Avoid the Noid? Cap’n Kilroy: Yes, Jun, I did. But that’s neither here, nor there, I know full well what this man can do inside that wrestling ring and it’s not all wristlocks, and shoving his junk into your face... Jun Mazuki: It’s quite a bit of shoving Jun’s junk into people’s faces. Cap’n Kilroy: ...that’s true, there will be plenty of junk to face action in this tournament, but what I’m trying to tell you people out there in the Television Kingdom is that you are more than just phallic humor, you are a man who has weathered the storm of several independent feds. You’ve studied the art of systematic dismantling of the human knee, you are as strong as an ox, no, as strong as two, maybe even three oxes. Jun Mazuki: Jun believes the word is oxen. A smartphone appears in our Captain RubberBand Beard’s hand, he types a bit. Cap’n Kilroy: By Brian Regan’s Beard your are correct! But grammatical discourse aside, this man is not a man you want to have dancing with the devil at moonlight. He’s dangerous, he’s off-kilter, and he’s teaming with a gentleman who is as violent and sadistic as Jun is Asian and pornographic. We hear a bit of laughter from above, and the camera pans up a slender man wearing a black coat is sitting on the catwalk his barefeet dangling off the edge, and he’s flanked by two mannequins dressed in flapper dresses, one red, the other green. He idly waves down to the two men, and whispers something to the mannequin in the red dress, he nods as if confirming something, and he laughs again. The Dark Curse himself, Leon Corbin must have heard a great joke from the mannequin. Cap’n Kilroy: What’s he doing up there? Jun Mazuki: We were planning our strategy, coming up with a gameplan, we decided we needed a break, so Jun called up... Jun reaches over and grabs a clipboard and reads quickly ...Stephanie Dreyers here. Heh, Stephanie Dreyers, it’s like the woman who wrote Twilight and the Ice Cream place, that’s a good stage name. Stephanie Dreyers: That’s actually my real name. Jun Mazuki: ... Cap’n Kilroy: ... Stephanie Dteyers: ... Red Dress Flapper Mannequin,: ... The most awkward pause between a woman giving a blowjob, a man receiving a blowjob and that man’s manager that has ever occurred in the history of the world lingers just a bit longer until Jun cuts into the silence with a deft change of subject. Jun Mazuki: So we took a little break and Leon-kun wanted to get up high, it sets him at ease he said, so Jun showed him the proper ladder, and up he went. Cap’n Kilroy: But what about the plans I made for you? The Cap’n produces several sheets of paper with diagrams of the human anatomy with little skull and crossbones drawn and arrows pointing to various regions of the figure, predominantly the head and neck region. There’s also a drawing of a cat holding a steel chair. Jun Mazuki: We can add those in, but mainly Jun was going to hit them with Jun’s junk and Leon was going to burn stuff. Cap’n Kilroy turns over a page. Cap’n Kilroy: That’s all well and good, but that’s Stage Two of my master plan, I call How To Succeed at Tag Teaming Without Really Trying. First you need the basics, I call them, Sticks and Stones will Break Their Bones, but a Steel Chair will Work in a Pinch and Still Really Hurt. Jun Mazuki: Now wrestling fans out there, don’t think we are just chair-shots, dick jokes and fire. We aren’t out to hurt people... The Dark Curse suddenly looks really sad. ...all the time. People usually do wind up hurt when we get involved. He cheers up. But know that we won’t stand by for any shenanigans or hijinx, unless we are the perpetrators of said hijinx and shenanigans. Cap’n Kilroy: Unless they are really funny. Jun Mazuki: Then, of course, we’ll have to return the favor. And add a bit of interest on top. We are quite aware that there are some namey-names out there in this shindig. The Terry Marvin’s, The Level-Ones, the Cap’n’s Cousin Rex and Sally Talfourds. There’s our own beloved PERSERVERENCE and tag champions like the CarnEvil Connection, the list goes on and on and on. And then there’s us. Three guys who have nothing in common, other than being a little uncommon. The PornStarro, the Family Man and the Man Who Talks to Mannequins. Just bringing our own sense of fun and games to the Clash of The Titans. Oh the fun we’ll have, oh the games we’ll play... Cap’n Kilroy: Caloo-calay. Jun Mazuki: Leon will wind you up, and Jun will shove you down... down into Jun’s tights where you’ll be driven straight to Nirvana, your skulls rattling off the mat like Michael J. Fox playing Yahtzee, or maybe Jun will take you to the mat and grind your knees like a fine pulp, and then Leon, dearest Leon will lock you in his half-crab whilst stomping your head and you’ll scream your surrender. Maybe for fun we’ll do a bit of both. We won’t say that the ends justify the means, but we do mean that we’ll just end you. A less verbose man once said that you should expect the unexpected, we aren’t that clever, so we will tell you what you’ll get. A face full of Japanese Cock and fire, my little Scare-crows, fire. Not figurative stuff either, actual face melting, skin searing flames. Be prepared for the worst, because we are going to do our best to be entertaining in the only ways we know how. By having a Roman Holiday. I. AM. PORRRRRRRRRRRRRNSTAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAROOOOOOOOOOOO And he... Jun points up to the catwalk. Leon is saying something we can't pick up but he seems to be in a heated argument with the mannequin in the green flapper dress. ...is a Dark Curse. And we are lead by one of the brightest minds in wrestling today. The camera cuts to Cap’n Kilroy working on a Rubik’s Cube, via taking off the stickers and moving them to more favorable spots. He manages to solve it in three seconds, so suck it Tobias Burden. Unfortunately for you, you are not us, you are you, and we are coming for you. Be prepared. We fade out as The Good Cap’n starts singing Scar’s song from The Lion King. |
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| LeonCorbin | Mar 1 2013, 11:43 PM Post #3 |
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[A large, out-of-service fairground. Since he burned the remains of his warehouse after it was turned to rubble by Hurricane Sandy, this disused fairground has become the playground of Leon Corbin and his associates. And yes, for those of you who already saw the Jun promo, we do mean the mannequins. This is the place where Leon comes to ponder the most important things in his life. How to win matches.. Which CRW official to toast next.. What percentage of Cain has to be adapted by that crazy experimental surgery before he becomes the real-life RoboCain... And how much marzipan can one man eat before he throws up. (For those interested, Kilroy managed to get through quite a lot before upchucking behind the ferris wheel. Nobody actually counted accurately however, because that would have been logical). It's also where he shoots the majority of his CRW promos, so it's only fitting that he does the same for ViW. Don't want you all feeling left out now do we? As the camera cuts from the helicopter cam flypass to a building interior, we're faced with a traditional Corbin sight. A corridor of mannequins, each attired in some other crazy getup reflecting different potential tournament opponents. Down the centre of the lines strides Leon, dressed in his usual black gothic trenchcoat, sitting above ROOOOAAAARRRIIIINNNGGG COOOOCCCKKK T-shirt (available now from the CRW Shop!!). His lower half black jeans and boots, rounding out the dark look of the Dark Curse. As per usual, his hair is unkempt and crazy, much like the man himself. Leon reaches the front of the line, where a the Rex and Talford mannequins appear to be in conversation. He shushes them, before giving the camera his best stern look.] (Leon): My fellow Visionaries... [Is that the term for people involved in ViW? I've no idea. Let's assume it is.] (Leon): I have been told that by the time you see this, you will already have met my team-mates, even though this is being filmed first. So you're seeing the bit done first second, and the bit done second first. Think of it like time travel. Except without the car-slash-police box-slash-phonebooth. Anyway... Hello future people from the past!! [Leon waves at the camera. He slowly begins to look distracted, turning towards the Rex mannequin again.] (Leon): I THOUGHT I TOLD YOU TO SHUSH WHILE I'M TALKING TO THE AUDIENCE... YOU GET YOUR OWN PROMO DAMMIT!! STOP STEALING MINE!!! [A moments of silence. For those of you who haven't yet twigged, this is when the mannequin replies to Leon. No, I will not be translating. Or providing a guide book. You'll have to infer from context.] (Leon): I don't care what everyone else is doing. And anyway, who let you in here? Shouldn't you be in prison? [Some murmured discussion can be heard off-screen, before Kilroy wanders into shot. He places a set of cardboard prison bars into the mannequin's hands, so it's holding them before it's face, much like you'd see in some low-budget amateur dramatics. Leon nods at Kilroy as he leaves the shot again.] (Leon): Now.. With factual-accuracy preserved... Back to my point. [No, there hadn't been a real point yet, but we'll get back to getting to it. Hopefully.] (Leon): So.. I've been told by my people... Yeah, I have people. No, not those people, the other people. The manager-y ones... But they told me that his big tag-team tournament thing is for some shiny new titles. And that there will be people I know and people I don't know. Which means there are people that don't know me. Now, I don't have a time machine, so I don't know how much you'll know about me at the point you see this. With that in mind, I shall introduce myself... Via the medium of dance... [Kilroy walks back into shot, whispering something into Leon's ear that causes the Dark Curse to look disappointed.] (Leon): So.. Apparently I'm not doing the dance thing.. Too much complication securing the musical rights... Plan B it is... [The scene wipes, bringing us to a super-close-up of Corbin's face.] (Leon): Paint me like one of your French girls! [A camera cut, and we see the ViW tournament mannequins, each stood before a blank easel in a semi-circle around a presumably naked Dark Curse (the handily placed bowl of fruit on a table preventing us from seeing any of the inappropriate parts. This isn't a Jun promo!.. That's above..). The camera cuts again, this time to the end of the sofa Leon is laying upon, with the end providing the perfect cover again for his lower body. To our left, we can still see majority of the mannequins.] (Leon): So, about myself. Well, I'm the man that broke both of Carlisle Cain's legs. I set a referee on fire. I locked a guy in a dumpster so he couldn't compete. I carried around a blood-spattered title belt. I threatened a guy with a knife upon first meeting him. Errm... Oooh, and I put my therapist in hospital!! [And that was all in under a year. Leon's been busy.] (Leon): Sure, it's nothing compared to a lot of you. Former World Champions. Tournament winners. Experts competitors. But I have something none of you do. I have them. [A sly double-tap on the side of his head] (Leon): I know what you're thinking. They're not real. They're just in your head... Well let me tell you.. The Curse is very real. And it's very dangerous... They know things. They see things. They sense things. And they want things.. Like the ViW Tag Team titles. [Corbin's face contorts in a cruel smile] (Leon): You better start praying we don't get to the final. Me, let loose in a TLC match where anything goes? ANYTHING?! Have you not watched Code Red Wrestling at all? Fire, crucifixion spikes, and more fire.. And that's before I stomp heads. And before Jun hits you with his... [Leon goes to point to his t-shirt, then realises he's no longer wearing said t-shirt] (Leon): Dammit... That's before he hits you with his... [Leon points off screen. The camera follows, past Kilroy playing Chess with a mannequin, and on to the face of the Pornstarooooo] (Jun): ROOOOOOAAAAAAAAARRRRRRIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNGGGGGGGG COOOOOOOOOOOOOOCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKKKKK [We head backwards again, just in time to see Kilroy flipping the table as he's put into checkmate, and back to Corbin.] (Leon): So be prepared.. And expect the unexpected... [The camera slides backwards, and tracks right, passing what used to be a series of blank easels. Each now bears a different image. A bowl of fruit... A shark... What appears to be a wrestling ring surrounded by a large perspex box, inside which Donovan Davenport and Tobias Burden appear to be wrestling surrounded by bees... Heath Ledger as the Joker.. A perfect copy of the Mona Lisa... And finally, a picture of Jun sat on a large bean bag, receiving fellatio from a blonde-haired woman, with Kilroy next to him in a Hawaiian shirt, and Leon on a walkway above them, a flapper-mannequin either side of him. Corbin peers around the frame, now fully-dressed as he was to begin this promo.] (Leon): We are Pornstarroo... We are The Dark Curse... We are UnStable... [Leon takes one look at the picture, before looking across at Kilroy] (Leon): Hey... Kilroy... If Timmy's drawn a perfect representation of the Promo we're about to film at Jun's, you buy ice-cream for the team? [From off-screen, we hear the voice of the Un-Stable manager.] (Kilroy): You're on! [Corbin grabs the picture and walks from shot. We fade to black.] |
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3:40 AM Jul 11