Welcome Guest [Log In] [Register]
Add Reply
About me; life story
Topic Started: Oct 14 2012, 09:11 AM (21 Views)
harrelsonceleste

hello My name is Celeste I am now 20 year's old and getting married this month on the 20th of October. I would like to talk about my life story because I know many people have been through this same thing and even for people who are going through this right now hopefully this help's you know that you are not alone. I will start in different section's of ages.

((1-3 YEAR'S OLD)) I was born on May 26th, 1992 I don't remember much these few year's of my newborn life but I do know that my mom was a drug addict and did cheat on my Father frequently while I was 1 year's old. At 2 year's old my mom started to get abused by her Boyfriend's and this was the year that my parent's split up and got divorced. At 3 year's old my father had become a volunteer firefighter and he tried to be around as much as possible but being a volunteer firefighter was a 24/7 hr/day job.

((4-7 YEAR'S OLD)) At 4 year's old I started to notice that my mother always had cop's coming to the door for disturbances from neighbor's. After awhile neighbor's started to notice are broken down home and when they would come to visit the stench of mold would burn there eyes. Our house was basically falling apart and we were very poor. At 5 year's old My big sister was being sexually abused by my mother's boyfriend and the child protective services were called very frequently during my 4-7 year's of age. At 6 Year's old My father started to have issues with his eyes that continued which led to him finding out that being a firefighter led to chemical's in his eyes which caused his eyesight to be lost, It was Glaucoma. This is where I started to not care for myself but more for other's. I use to take care of him 24/7. One day My home was disturbed by child protection services and we were forcefully taken away from my mother.. Me and my brother's/sister's were in foster homes but we were separated and we were in foster care up until we were 8 year's old. At 7 year's old I blocked everyone out of my life and stopped eating the usual amount of your daily food's, This continued until I was out of foster care.

((8-11 YEAR'S OLD)) At 8 year's old I was finally out of foster care and greeted by my father at the front door, Made me extremely happy that he had gotten full custody of me and my other brother's and sisters. At 9 year's old I started to get bullied by next door neighbor's and at school. I only had 4 friend's who i still do care for deeply. My father started to notice me hiding burn's on my skin.. This is when my mother and her boyfriend started to burn me with cigarette's if i did even one mistake, Made my father very upset.. At 10 years old I took my first drink of alcohol, I started to hide anything i took from my mother's house anywhere in my room.. At 11 year's old I lost my virginity to some guy, I knew him from school and yes it was my mistake and to be that young I felt very horrible that I had let someone mess with me like that but I wasn't myself then because of the alcohol. This is when the bullies started to get more energetic with pushing my feelings. My family argued every single day and it was nonstop. it was a daily ordeal for them but me and my father were the ones who kept that space and wanted no part of it. There was one day where my father got so upset with my mom's side of the family because i was treated unfairly out of all the other children and it or forceful and the cop's were called. I had to see through my very own eyes the person I care for more deeply then anything in this world get thrown on the floor and handcuffed and driven away in a police car.

((12-16 YEAR'S OLD)) At 12 year's old I started to get jumped and i started to get very insecure with my skin and body and especially my color.. The town i lived in was based on your color and who you hung out with, Almost like what every school is still based on. At 13 year's old I was then introduced to Marijuana, I was very grown up during these past few year's though. I bottled up all of my emotion's and helped as many of my friend's or internet friend's to cope with there issues as possible. I then started to get a habit of scrubbing my arm's with the top of pencil eraser's and made it to where my skin was completely damaged. This is when I started to get bullied more for my rising issues. At 14 year's old I was completely bottling up my issues and did not talk to anyone. I still hurt my body in many different way's because i did not like the way i was. I had so much stress weighing over me too. I wanted to be so perfect but ended up still be so unliked. At 15 year's old Me and my father took upon ourselves to move out of that state and start fresh, First I was starting to look up and become a whole new person. I had very nice fiend's in high school, Until one day they started to reveal to me who they really were.. They were addicted to drug's, sex, and some very bad violence and attitude behavior's. I than started going to parties with them for most of these month's and I started to act out but i never showed my father who i was becoming because i knew it would break his heart. At 16 year's old I started to date my friend's friend's who were much older then i was. Jerry was one of my first abusive boyfriend's.. I could not talk back to him or I would end up getting choked or slapped and even bruised in certain areas.. I then got the courage to brake this relationship off even if it did end up with me lying about my broken rib to my father.

((17-20 YEAR'S OLD)) At 17 year's old not even 3 month's after me and jerry had split up I then met Micheal. He was very fun to be around and he was completely different when i first met him up until i started to get intimate with him.. I started to realize that he was very glued to me as in i couldn't do anything without him knowing where i was going 24/7.. He then started to get very forceful sexually which made me really uncomfortable.. My father knew something was going on but he couldn't grasp that certain issue because i led him to believe that everything was just fine because then again his feeling's always came first.. One night i was at his party and my drink was spiked.. I ended up being used over and over again by his friend's.. ((AND AGAIN I KNOW THIS WAS MY MISTAKE FOR EVEN GOING TO THIS PARTY, I SHOULD'VE KNOWN BETTER AND STILL DO BLAME MYSELF)). Other than that at 18 year's old i was on the verge of leaving him and he grasped the fact that i was getting farther away from him and he did not like it, which i then found out i was being threatened with a certain video if i was to brake up with him.. This was the video that ended up being from that was night of my drink getting spiked and me blacking out.. My father did find this video and it was traced back to Micheal.. They saw it as consensual and it still follows me everywhere i go.. At that time i broke up with him and suffered some head trauma and some scars to show for my battle of leaving him.. At 18 year's old i was taking aspirin pill's and my daily routine to relieve myself from stress. I than met my soon to be fiance on the internet.. He was facing some heartache by splitting up with the one true love of his. I helped him through tis and it became a daily and nightly thing with talking 24/7 and even us falling asleep together on the phone. He was there for me while i had my panic attack's and he was there for me when he found out i then did try to take my life because of everything that was following me around. He was my inspiration of getting better. I first quit my aspirin habit with his help, and once that happened the happiest day of my life had become true.. He asked me out, So i then became his girlfriend.. It was long distance though.. I than stopped smoking and drinking and partying slowly because i did not want to lose the most happy part of my life which was having him. my life started to look better with him beside me.. I did leave school but i went to online schooling. at 19 year's old it was our second year of being together and he bought me a plane ticket by surprise and my father did not stop me because he never seen his babygirl this happy in his whole life. I met with him for 2 week's and everything went so great it was the time of my life... 3 month's later he was at my doorstep ready to move me in with him at his home state.. until this day i still have these memories but they are just a small figment of my past and with his help i overcame everything and im happy that i am still alive today. im marrying this man this month and i can never be more happy than i am right now..


I PRAY THAT THIS YOUNG GIRL IS HAVING THE TIME OF HER LIFE WITHOUT ANYMORE PAIN IN HEAVEN WITH GOD.. MAY YOU REST IN PEACE AND MAY YOUR BEAUTIFUL SOUL BE THE PATH TO HELP OTHER'S COPE WITH THERE PAIN AND TRAUMA. R.I.P AMANDA MICHELLE TODD
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
1 user reading this topic (1 Guest and 0 Anonymous)
« Previous Topic · Introduce yourself · Next Topic »
Add Reply