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protect ichimatsu 2k16; since he won't do it himself!
Topic Started: Mar 21 2016, 07:28 PM (414 Views)
IchimatsuBoy
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[Karamatsu's had sort of a bad feeling for a while now, about where Ichimatsu might have gone. He never mentioned a job in specific, nor offered any address for visiting or anything, and he's a little bit harder to contact than his other brothers, so... he's been worried. Today, that feeling is only magnified. It's been two days or so since Ichimatsu's answered his text messages, and that's... actually unusual. He hasn't felt like Ichimatsu really liked him in years, but he'd at least kept up responding to Karamatsu's texts checking in on him. Maybe that was just to make sure he wouldn't be bothered by any more direct meddling...?]

[Whatever the reason, he hasn't answered now, and Karamatsu can't help but worry -- maybe he's worrying too much where he has no place to be, but still... So he's out looking tonight, making rounds at the nearby internet and manga cafes. It makes him feel a little guilty, that that's where he thinks his brother is living, but... It's just a feeling. He hopes he's wrong. It's not like anyone wants to tell him whether or not Ichimatsu's stayed there, and because they're all adults, saying he ran away from home doesn't really work to leverage information out of people...]

[It's been a couple hours of searching, and at this point he just sort of slumps against the wall outside of one, frustrated and trying hard not to cry, because that's not going to help him find his little brother by any means.]
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KaramatsuBoy
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[Ichimatsu has been...managing. As best he can, anyway. The fact that someone would drag him back if he told them exactly how so is precisely why he hasn't. Money is tight to say the least, and he's scraping by more than anything, to be able to stay somewhere at all - the cheapest places he can find. Which means food isn't as regular a thing as it probably should be, let alone the kind of food it takes to keep someone healthy.]

[But he'll be fine! He's determined. He just...hasn't been able to charge his phone to let anyone know.]

[He didn't think that would mean Karamatsu coming to find him, though, much less what seems like so easily -- or against the odds, at least. He has no time to evade him, either, since he rounds the corner and finds himself making direct eye contact with Karamatsu.]

[And if Ichimatsu is being honest with himself, he's probably not looking convincingly fine right now.]

How did you...?
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IchimatsuBoy
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[The shock is plain on his face, though it's quickly replaced by some mixture of fear and concern. He looks... kind of ragged, his hair is even more of a mess than usual, and he looks thinner, and Karamatsu is... really, really glad he acted on his instincts and went to find him.]

Ichimatsu...!

[He moves quickly, maybe afraid Ichimatsu would try to run or something, and goes and reaches for his brother's shoulders, holding onto him tightly. Not as tightly as he'd like, but it'll do, as long as he can hold onto him at all right now.]

Are -- no, of course you're not okay... Why didn't you tell anyone!? Why didn't you go home!? Mom and dad would never want this for you... None of us would!!
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KaramatsuBoy
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[This is why he didn't say anything. This concern is too much for him, it makes him feel almost sick -- it's more than he's worth. But it hurts worst of all from Karamatsu, and he can't voice why.]

[His brother's hands are on his shoulders almost before he can react. Maybe Karamatsu knows there's part of him that would like to turn and walk away, go hide in his room in the manga cafe -- anything but look at the worry on his brother's face that he caused.]

I'm fine is why. Why did you come?

[He's glad that Karamatsu cared enough to do it, in a way, but it's too much to face this.]
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IchimatsuBoy
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You don't look "fine" at all, which is what I was afraid of... You didn't answer, and... I didn't know whether you were sick of talking to me or something had gone wrong. ... But it's been going wrong since you left, if this is how you've been getting along...

[He gulps, his own nerves getting the best of him somewhat here... It feels like this would be so easy to screw up, so easy to make Ichimatsu angry and alienate him, and then maybe he'll never accept help from any part of the family. So he's really got to do this right, somehow.]

I have my own apartment now, why don't you come stay with me for a while? It doesn't have to be long. I just don't want you to have to stay like this. Please. You're my little brother, I can't leave this alone.
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KaramatsuBoy
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[They've all called Karamatsu painful, but Ichimatsu is pretty certain what it means to him is on another level. This hurts, Karamatsu's concern hurts, the idea of staying at his apartment, just the two of them... All ideas he shouldn't be having. But he does, he's gotten thoughts like this for years.]

I didn't answer because my phone died, nothing went wrong. You worry too much...

[You worry about me more than I deserve...]

You can't, huh... Fine. If it doesn't have to be long...
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IchimatsuBoy
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No. Not long at all. Just -- just until you have a sure way to keep making money, alright? Please. That's the very least I can live with, knowing that you won't have to worry about things that way.

[He'd still worry, and he'd still rather Ichimatsu be with him, but that's all sorts of unfair. He can't stifle his brother's independence and probable want for some privacy just because he wants him in more ways than he should. Doing just this much means he's just being a good big brother, he's just doing his job, and that's the least he can do, to make up for how messed up he is.]

... We'll go there, then, and I'll make you a nice dinner and you can have my bed and just -- relax, alright?

[Hesitantly, as if he still expects Ichimatsu to bolt like a kitty, he lifts his hands from his shoulders, but he doesn't look satisfied yet.]
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KaramatsuBoy
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[Ichimatsu huffs a little, like a begrudging agreement. He wants to ask what the most is that Karamatsu could live with then, but... he can't. He shouldn't.]

[And of course it's just like Karamatsu to offer his bed, but that thought is...ugh. Maybe it's easier than all the time spent sleeping next to Karamatsu wishing they could be closer, but maybe he misses just the excuse to be that close too. There's a different weight to this being just Karamatsu's bed too.]

[But he can't possibly bring that up.]

What's that look for? I... I won't run, okay?

[It's an excuse mostly, but he'll take it; he grabs his brother's hand to make his point, supposedly.]

So show me the way.
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IchimatsuBoy
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[He's not offering his bed for entirely selfless reasons, though. There is a part of him that just thinks it'd be nice to have Ichimatsu in there, even if they couldn't be in there at the same time or anything. But that's messed up, so he's sticking with altruism.]

[He has no plans to let go of Ichimatsu's hand, though, now that his brother has his own. Even if he wouldn't run away, Karamatsu will just use this excuse to keep him even close, that's fine with him. It's soft and warm and it belongs to Ichimatsu and that's all he's ever really wanted to get to experience.]

Can you blame me for worrying?

[He starts off back towards his apartment, though -- not home, because it's not quite home, but living by himself and being independent isn't as terrible as he'd thought, sort of. Being a salaryman isn't that fun or rewarding, but he's actually kind of fond of how he looks in his suit...]

It's not that far, luckily...
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KaramatsuBoy
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[Just by the way Karamatsu holds his hand in return, he can tell his brother doesn't plan to let go. He can't decide if that's comforting or if it just hurts. It's something he's wanted, something he's thought about but-- not like this.]

No. But I wish you wouldn't...

[It's all grumbled. He doesn't want to voice all the reasons Karamatsu's concern hurt more than anything. It's awful how the hurt wins out over the warm feelings, glad that his brother cares. Why does he have to be such a mess, on so many levels here?]

You didn't go too out of your way then.

[A small comfort.]
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